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Posted: 10/11/2002 7:38:49 AM EDT

> A few minutes before the services started, the townspeople were sitting in
> their pews and talking.
>
> Suddenly, Satan appeared at the front of the church.
>
> Everyone started screaming and running for the front entrance, trampling
> each other in a frantic effort to get away from evil incarnate.
>
> Soon everyone had exited the church except for one elderly gentleman who
> sat calmly in his pew without moving, seeming oblivious to the fact that
> God's ultimate enemy was in his presence.
>
> So Satan walked up to the old man and said, "Don't you know who I am?"
>
> The man replied, "Yep, sure do."
>
> "Aren't you afraid of me?" Satan asked.
>
> "Nope, sure ain't," said the man.
>
> "Don't you realize I can kill you with a word?" asked Satan.
>
> "Don't doubt it for a minute," returned the old man, in an even tone.
>
> "Did you know that I could cause you profound, horrifying, physical AGONY
> for all eternity?" persisted Satan.
>
> "Yep," was the calm reply.
>
> "And you're still not afraid?" asked Satan.
>
> "Nope." More than a little perturbed, Satan asked, "Well, why aren't you
> afraid of me?"
>
> The man calmly replied, "Been married to your sister for over 48 years."

Posted: 10/11/2002 10:28:15 AM EDT

[#1]

Hey!!! I know her!!! [shock]

How about some lawyer jokes? [:D]

1. Did you hear that the Post Office just recalled their latest stamps?
They had pictures of lawyers on them and people couldn't figure out
which side to spit on.

2. How can a pregnant woman tell that she's carrying a future lawyer?
She has an uncontrollable craving for baloney.

3. How does an attorney sleep? First he lies on one side, then he lies
on the other.

4. How many lawyer jokes are there? Only three. The rest are true
stories.

5. How many lawyers does it take to change a light bulb? How many can
you afford?

6. How many lawyers does it take to screw in a light bulb? Three. One
to climb the ladder. One to shake it. And one to sue the ladder company.

7. If a lawyer and an IRS agent were both drowning, and you could only
save one of them, would you go to lunch or read the paper?

8. What did the lawyer name his daughter? Sue.

9. What do you call 25 skydiving lawyers? Skeet.

10. What do you call a lawyer gone bad? Senator.

11. What do you call a lawyer with an IQ of 50? Your Honor.

12. What do you throw to a drowning lawyer? His partners.

13. What does a lawyer use for birth control? His personality.

14. What happens when you cross a pig with a lawyer? Nothing. There are
some things a pig just won't do.

15. What's the difference between a lawyer and a vulture? The lawyer
gets frequent flyer miles.

Posted: 10/11/2002 3:52:10 PM EDT

[#2]

BTT for the night shift

Posted: 10/11/2002 5:07:55 PM EDT

[#3]

Have you been to the restaurant on the moon?

Great food, but no atmosphere.

Posted: 10/12/2002 1:44:36 AM EDT

[#4]

BBAAAWWWWAAA loved the postal recalled stamps!!

Great jokes guys needed that!

Sent whole page !
Bob [:D]

Posted: 10/12/2002 2:24:23 AM EDT

[#5]

[b]Botta-Bing ![/b] [:D]

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