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Posted: 1/5/2012 6:24:41 PM EDT
[Last Edit: 1/5/2012 6:26:07 PM EDT by MHarvey124]
There was a 1911 cocked and locked in my hands along with a M&P 9mm in my wife's hand.

Last night around 9pm I was watching TV in the family room and the wife unit was in the bedroom watching her shows when someone tried to open the door to my apartment which was all of 5 feet away from me. No knock. No ringing doorbell. Just tried to open the door and walk in. Thankfully both deadbolts were locked.

I live in a pretty good area and I've never been super worried about home security but I do keep the doors locked at all times and there is a 1911 in the drawer of coffee table right in front of me.

Grabbed the 1911 and walked over to the door and looked through the peephole. All I see is black. This person trying to open the door to my apartment has apparently covered the peephole. This is where I get a little concerned. We just moved to the area and don't have really any friends or family members that would think it be funny to cover up the peep hole. In the moment I couldn't fathom any reason why someone would cover up the peephole and think that's proper etiquette.

I attempt to find my balls and drop my voice as low as possible and call out "Who is it?" No answer. Person again tries to turn the knob and open my door. I call out again.

This point the wife comes into the room with her 9mm M&P as she can tell is something wrong. I again check the peep hole and see a young lady starts to walk away from the door and down the steps to the first floor.

End of the situation. I waited by the door looking through the peephole for a few more minutes with no further interaction.


Yea I know CSB and all and pics of wife are required per GD rules but I just wanted to share my 5 minutes of fun last night that got my blood flow moving a little faster.
Link Posted: 1/5/2012 6:25:37 PM EDT
My bad dude. I was one floor off from my apt.
Link Posted: 1/5/2012 6:26:44 PM EDT

rulez man.

pics of wife

did you pee yourself?


Link Posted: 1/5/2012 6:26:57 PM EDT
She just wanted a threesome, dude. You lose.
Link Posted: 1/5/2012 6:27:53 PM EDT
Sorry dude I was kinda drunk.
Link Posted: 1/5/2012 6:29:14 PM EDT

Originally Posted By MHarvey124:
There was a 1911 cocked and locked in my hands along with a M&P 9mm in my wife's hand.

.

All I see is black.

That's racist
Link Posted: 1/5/2012 6:29:47 PM EDT
Link Posted: 1/5/2012 6:30:02 PM EDT
Originally Posted By RI0T:

rulez man.

pics of wife

did you pee yourself?




let's not devolve this into another pee pee thread. K?
Link Posted: 1/5/2012 6:31:46 PM EDT
[Last Edit: 1/5/2012 6:32:10 PM EDT by NwG]
Maybe she really had to pee?

Decided the back yard or roof was a better option after you failed to let her in?


ETA- Too late!
Link Posted: 1/5/2012 6:32:34 PM EDT
This point the wife comes into the room with her 9mm M&P as she can tell is something wrong. I again check the peep hole and see a young lady starts to walk away from the door and down the steps to the first floor.



Was she hot?
Link Posted: 1/5/2012 6:34:10 PM EDT

Originally Posted By thylaughingman:
Originally Posted By RI0T:

rulez man.

pics of wife

did you pee yourself?




let's not devolve this into another pee pee thread. K?


i didn't mean to piss anybody off

but that would make me tinkle a wee bit in my dwares


Link Posted: 1/5/2012 6:37:11 PM EDT
Originally Posted By 70satvert:
My bad dude. I was one floor off from my apt.




I shit you not, I did that once. Rode my bike home from a bar. Took it up elevator instead of stairs like normal. Must have hit 3 instead of 2.


I was shaking that door. Putting my key in it. Then noticed the lock was upside down. I strted freaking out that someone had broke into my apartment, and had busted the lock.

I crouched down to look under the door for feet.

Then when I stood up, I saw rhe numbers. I got the hell out of there before I got shot.


Lol.
Link Posted: 1/5/2012 6:38:40 PM EDT
That is when you quickly swing the door open and leave them staring down the barrel of a 12 gauge.
Link Posted: 1/5/2012 6:39:10 PM EDT
[Last Edit: 1/5/2012 6:40:15 PM EDT by 70satvert]
Originally Posted By patchouli:
Originally Posted By 70satvert:
My bad dude. I was one floor off from my apt.




I shit you not, I did that once. Rode my bike home from a bar. Took it up elevator instead of stairs like normal. Must have hit 3 instead of 2.


I was shaking that door. Putting my key in it. Then noticed the lock was upside down. I strted freaking out that someone had broke into my apartment, and had busted the lock.

I crouched down to look under the door for feet.

Then when I stood up, I saw rhe numbers. I got the hell out of there before I got shot.


Lol.


This past August I moved into a new apartment. I lived on the 3rd floor. I tried to go into the apartment under me at least 3 times using the key, and once I actually walked right in because their door was unlocked. I gtfo instantly. This was all in about 4 months.
Link Posted: 1/5/2012 6:39:56 PM EDT
Call the 911 operator and ask permission if you can shoot.
Link Posted: 1/5/2012 6:41:07 PM EDT
Do you think it was an arfcomer? Then why did you write your post as if you were talking to the guy that tried to open your door?
Link Posted: 1/5/2012 6:42:39 PM EDT
That is great your wife is aware. The other day I heard a noise and went out of the bedroom with pistol in hand. My wife walks in front of me to take our son to his room...
Link Posted: 1/5/2012 6:48:07 PM EDT

Originally Posted By Chris0013:

That is when you quickly swing the door open and leave them staring down the barrel of a 12 gauge.

That's a genius idea.
Link Posted: 1/5/2012 6:58:17 PM EDT
Originally Posted By 70satvert:
My bad dude. I was one floor off from my apt.


You look like a "young lady"?
Link Posted: 1/5/2012 6:58:59 PM EDT
Originally Posted By southeast_scrounger:
Originally Posted By 70satvert:
My bad dude. I was one floor off from my apt.


You look like a "young lady"?


Only when I tuck it under.
Link Posted: 1/5/2012 7:04:08 PM EDT
Least your weapons wouldn't have over penetrated..........The closest weapon I have to me usually is a FN.
Link Posted: 1/5/2012 7:05:18 PM EDT
open door 1911 pointed at face area say hi
Link Posted: 1/5/2012 7:07:55 PM EDT
[Last Edit: 1/5/2012 7:10:01 PM EDT by Alaskacajun]
Originally Posted By 70satvert:
Originally Posted By southeast_scrounger:
Originally Posted By 70satvert:
My bad dude. I was one floor off from my apt.


You look like a "young lady"?


Only when I tuck it under.




Would you fuck me? I'de fuck me....

- Clint

Link Posted: 1/5/2012 7:49:38 PM EDT
Dam, I was wondering why my craigslist hook up never showed.
Link Posted: 1/5/2012 7:52:29 PM EDT
Originally Posted By 70satvert:
Originally Posted By southeast_scrounger:
Originally Posted By 70satvert:
My bad dude. I was one floor off from my apt.


You look like a "young lady"?


Only when I tuck it under.


I wish you lived closer to me.
Link Posted: 1/5/2012 7:59:43 PM EDT
Link Posted: 1/5/2012 8:06:33 PM EDT
Does the girl live in the apt complex?
Link Posted: 1/5/2012 8:06:55 PM EDT
Originally Posted By cobra-ak:
Call the 911 operator and ask permission if you can shoot.


Link Posted: 1/5/2012 8:11:05 PM EDT
Insert Smart ass response here______________________.

Link Posted: 1/5/2012 8:17:59 PM EDT
Describing somebody turning a doorknob as "forcibly tr[ying] to open the door to my apartment" is a bit of an exaggeration.
Link Posted: 1/5/2012 8:19:06 PM EDT
I used to always get people with mistaken addresses when I lived in an apartment.

Of course, YOU don't know that it is just a "mistake" when they are trying to get into your apartment.

One of many things that make apartment living interesting, I guess.
Link Posted: 1/5/2012 8:21:52 PM EDT


So, you never got the Stripping Telegram that I sent you then?


Link Posted: 1/5/2012 8:24:54 PM EDT
For you, this means Ann Margaret's not coming.

Link Posted: 1/5/2012 8:26:17 PM EDT
[Last Edit: 1/5/2012 8:26:56 PM EDT by 6winchester2]
Originally Posted By theBUBBAMANcan:
For you, this means Ann Margaret's not coming.



Margret.

Link Posted: 1/5/2012 8:31:47 PM EDT
blah blah blah buy a membership right.., thats the GD trend right?
Link Posted: 1/5/2012 8:35:41 PM EDT
Was this the lady walking away?

Link Posted: 1/5/2012 8:40:27 PM EDT
Originally Posted By Mullah_Atari:
Describing somebody turning a doorknob as "forcibly tr[ying] to open the door to my apartment" is a bit of an exaggeration.


Leaving out the part about covering the peephole.
Link Posted: 1/5/2012 10:13:25 PM EDT
Originally Posted By Tim_the_enchanter:
Originally Posted By Mullah_Atari:
Describing somebody turning a doorknob as "forcibly tr[ying] to open the door to my apartment" is a bit of an exaggeration.


Leaving out the part about covering the peephole.


Meh, if she thought she was at the right place she could have been doing it to fuck with her friends. I've done it before. I know I'm not the only person.
Link Posted: 1/5/2012 10:26:25 PM EDT
That would be a time to unlock the 1911
Link Posted: 1/5/2012 10:27:01 PM EDT
Are you sure the previous renter didn't pull a Kramer and perform a tactical peephole reversal to prevent an ambush upon entering the apartment?
Link Posted: 1/5/2012 10:44:05 PM EDT
[Last Edit: 1/5/2012 10:44:56 PM EDT by Medester]
I hated living in an apartment community where all of the buildings and doors look the same. There wasn't uncommon to have a confused idiot think our door was theirs or their friend/familys. Wasn't worth getting the arsenal out over it though.


Link Posted: 1/5/2012 10:50:19 PM EDT

Originally Posted By Tim_the_enchanter:
Originally Posted By Mullah_Atari:
Describing somebody turning a doorknob as "forcibly tr[ying] to open the door to my apartment" is a bit of an exaggeration.


Leaving out the part about covering the peephole.

That's still not forcibly opening a door. You forcibly open a door by kicking it in, using a battering ram, prying it open with a crowbar, forcing the door-frame apart with a hydraulic jack, using explosives, and the like. Turning the doorknob is how you normally open a door. Covering the peephole isn't how you open a door, at all. I could see calling it forcing the door open if the terminator wrenched the door from the frame with the doorknob, but that's not what happened.
Link Posted: 1/5/2012 10:54:26 PM EDT

Originally Posted By BatchelorGroda:
Was this the lady walking away?

http://30.media.tumblr.com/tumblr_lknd8l8rTd1qapzs5o1_400.jpg


Sees what you did there
Link Posted: 1/5/2012 10:59:19 PM EDT
Originally Posted By Mullah_Atari:

Originally Posted By Tim_the_enchanter:
Originally Posted By Mullah_Atari:
Describing somebody turning a doorknob as "forcibly tr[ying] to open the door to my apartment" is a bit of an exaggeration.


Leaving out the part about covering the peephole.

That's still not forcibly opening a door. You forcibly open a door by kicking it in, using a battering ram, prying it open with a crowbar, forcing the door-frame apart with a hydraulic jack, using explosives, and the like. Turning the doorknob is how you normally open a door. Covering the peephole isn't how you open a door, at all. I could see calling it forcing the door open if the terminator wrenched the door from the frame with the doorknob, but that's not what happened.


Since you want to play the role of the obtuse douchebag, I'll join you, and note that force can be defined as a physical influence that tends to change the position of an object with mass, equal to the rate of change in momentum of the object. Gripping a doorknob and turning it requires force. Therefore, the person did in fact attempt to focribly open the door.


Link Posted: 1/5/2012 11:08:25 PM EDT
Originally Posted By nchapa:
Do you think it was an arfcomer? Then why did you write your post as if you were talking to the guy that tried to open your door?


It's kinda a craigs list thing, among others. Chill out, Noel.
Link Posted: 1/5/2012 11:09:04 PM EDT
Originally Posted By saigamanTX:
Least your weapons wouldn't have over penetrated..........The closest weapon I have to me usually is a FN.


FN makes a variety of weapons.
Link Posted: 1/5/2012 11:11:28 PM EDT
Link Posted: 1/5/2012 11:14:54 PM EDT

Originally Posted By Tim_the_enchanter:
Originally Posted By Mullah_Atari:

Originally Posted By Tim_the_enchanter:
Originally Posted By Mullah_Atari:
Describing somebody turning a doorknob as "forcibly tr[ying] to open the door to my apartment" is a bit of an exaggeration.


Leaving out the part about covering the peephole.

That's still not forcibly opening a door. You forcibly open a door by kicking it in, using a battering ram, prying it open with a crowbar, forcing the door-frame apart with a hydraulic jack, using explosives, and the like. Turning the doorknob is how you normally open a door. Covering the peephole isn't how you open a door, at all. I could see calling it forcing the door open if the terminator wrenched the door from the frame with the doorknob, but that's not what happened.


Since you want to play the role of the obtuse douchebag, I'll join you, and note that force can be defined as a physical influence that tends to change the position of an object with mass, equal to the rate of change in momentum of the object. Gripping a doorknob and turning it requires force. Therefore, the person did in fact attempt to focribly open the door.


Somebody jiggled the wrong goddamned doorknob in an apartment complex. That's not force by any reasonable measure. The OP didn't foil a home invasion; that much is obvious. Probably all he did was remind Jackass McKnobjiggle that she was at the wrong door.

Link Posted: 1/5/2012 11:19:13 PM EDT
Originally Posted By 6winchester2:
I used to always get people with mistaken addresses when I lived in an apartment.

Of course, YOU don't know that it is just a "mistake" when they are trying to get into your apartment.

One of many things that make apartment living interesting, I guess.


30Cal story time...
So I was a sophmore in college, really digging my town home. I had ole girl on the couch, in a celebratory fashion, hands tied and feet skyward.
I have a bad habit of stacking shit in front of my doors, even when I forget to lock them.
Long story short, There I am, 1911 in retention agan my chest, pointed at the 120 pound asian pizza guy who had the wrong place and tried the knob. I was trying to fit the dude through the crack in the door while the chick tried to get her pants on, sans hands.
It all had a happy ending.
I kept my finger along the frame. Got a free pizza. Dude came back for self defense advice. I did appologize alot. True shit.
Link Posted: 1/5/2012 11:23:19 PM EDT
Originally Posted By 70satvert:
Originally Posted By patchouli:
Originally Posted By 70satvert:
My bad dude. I was one floor off from my apt.




I shit you not, I did that once. Rode my bike home from a bar. Took it up elevator instead of stairs like normal. Must have hit 3 instead of 2.


I was shaking that door. Putting my key in it. Then noticed the lock was upside down. I strted freaking out that someone had broke into my apartment, and had busted the lock.

I crouched down to look under the door for feet.

Then when I stood up, I saw rhe numbers. I got the hell out of there before I got shot.


Lol.


This past August I moved into a new apartment. I lived on the 3rd floor. I tried to go into the apartment under me at least 3 times using the key, and once I actually walked right in because their door was unlocked. I gtfo instantly. This was all in about 4 months.


My roommate back in college did the same a few times. We used to live on the second floor and moved to the third floor. A few times he accidentally just opened the door and walked into the apartment below. Once he told me him and his girlfriend walked into the apartment below and noticed a cat. He wondered when we got a cat then realized he was in the wrong apartment. Apologized to the neighbors and stepped out.
Link Posted: 1/5/2012 11:24:50 PM EDT
When I was in the nav, I once found a naked drunk girl sailor in my barracks bunk.




Turns out the base had used only like 4 different cores in the entire barracks complex, we both had the same lock core and so and she and stubmled into my room drunk as a possom. Great, right? well... she was pretty pissed when i work her up. Insisted I get out of "her" room.



Once I got her to understand she was in MY room she decided to leave. That's when I discovered she had pissed bed. She wasn't real happy when I made her replace my pissed on mattress with hers. (later, i realized hers was probably pissed in, too, but dried.)
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