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Posted: 2/22/2007 10:31:10 AM EST
Lately at my workplace, someone has been stealing lunches out of the refrigerator.

Food has had the seal broken like someone tasted the food and then left it.

I really cannot fathom how some dirty SOB could do this to the people they work with everyday. Do they sell a padlock for lunchboxes?
Link Posted: 2/22/2007 10:32:23 AM EST
Ex-lax brownies usually do the trick.
Link Posted: 2/22/2007 10:32:51 AM EST

Originally Posted By GabbasaurusRex:
Ex-lax brownies usually do the trick.

+ #2
Link Posted: 2/22/2007 10:33:40 AM EST
Fiddle dee dee! I seemed to drop rat poison in the Duncan Hines!
Link Posted: 2/22/2007 10:33:53 AM EST
ham & cheese sandwich w/ gojo substituted for the mayo...
Link Posted: 2/22/2007 10:34:50 AM EST

Originally Posted By V-Match:
ham & cheese sandwich w/ gojo substituted for the mayo...




seriously though - exlax brownies.
Link Posted: 2/22/2007 10:35:34 AM EST
LOL

spit on it and put lard inside.
Link Posted: 2/22/2007 10:37:19 AM EST
Or, grind-up a few Niacin supplement tablets in which to flavor the food. Should give the perp a good case of red-face.

Dave.
Link Posted: 2/22/2007 10:41:14 AM EST
Leave some ham out in the sun for a few days. Make a ham sandwich out of it, and leave it where the thief can find it. You can identify him/her when he's out from work for 3 days with food poisoning.
Link Posted: 2/22/2007 10:42:27 AM EST

Originally Posted By anr6t:
Leave some ham out in the sun for a few days. Make a ham sandwich out of it, and leave it where the thief can find it. You can identify him/her when he's out from work for 3 days with food poisoning.


Just use Peter Pan peanut butter.
Link Posted: 2/22/2007 10:43:07 AM EST
[Last Edit: 2/22/2007 10:46:59 AM EST by BillTheButcher]
-
Link Posted: 2/22/2007 10:47:02 AM EST

Originally Posted By GabbasaurusRex:
Ex-lax brownies usually do the trick.

Years ago we had a lunch thief at the factory i worked at. It was a BIG guy. So a bunch of us saved our old work boots till we got enough of them. On night one of us brought in EX-Lax chocolate chip cookies, we went around to all of the rest rooms, placed a pair of boots in each stall and then locked each one. Those of us who caught the show later almost wet their pants watching this guy run from rest room to rest room looking for an open stall.
Hot sauce sandwhiches work well too.
Link Posted: 2/22/2007 10:48:20 AM EST

Originally Posted By DancingBear:

Originally Posted By GabbasaurusRex:
Ex-lax brownies usually do the trick.

Years ago we had a lunch thief at the factory i worked at. It was a BIG guy. So a bunch of us saved our old work boots till we got enough of them. On night one of us brought in EX-Lax chocolate chip cookies, we went around to all of the rest rooms, placed a pair of boots in each stall and then locked each one. Those of us who caught the show later almost wet their pants watching this guy run from rest room to rest room looking for an open stall.
Hot sauce sandwhiches work well too.
Link Posted: 2/22/2007 10:48:57 AM EST
Epicac is a bitch.
Link Posted: 2/22/2007 10:58:30 AM EST
We had a woman storm around here demanding people leave food in the break room for her becuase she is pregnant. Everyone had stopped bringing stuff cause it got stolen
Link Posted: 2/22/2007 10:58:41 AM EST

Originally Posted By SJSAMPLE:
Epicac is a bitch.


Nice thing about it, if used corrrectly, everyone will assume either food poisoning or stomach flu.
Link Posted: 2/22/2007 11:01:10 AM EST

Originally Posted By Kalahnikid:

Originally Posted By V-Match:
ham & cheese sandwich w/ gojo substituted for the mayo...




seriously though - exlax brownies.


+ eleventy billion.

You don't fuck with another mans food.
Link Posted: 2/22/2007 11:02:17 AM EST
No comment other than if your a Work Fridge Bandit 'You get what you Deserve'

Link Posted: 2/22/2007 11:02:21 AM EST

Originally Posted By SJSAMPLE:
Epicac is a bitch.


oh hell's yeah.

The perp will be "PRT" (puking right there).
Link Posted: 2/22/2007 11:04:21 AM EST
Grease sammiches work pretty good too.
Link Posted: 2/22/2007 11:11:25 AM EST
[Last Edit: 2/22/2007 11:11:48 AM EST by BaxterStockman]
a friend solved his lunch thief problem by setting a rat trap inside his own lunch bag while it was laying sideways. Surprise! lunch thief came to work the next day with four broken fingers!
Link Posted: 2/22/2007 11:12:23 AM EST
Water line tracer dye. One teaspoon is enough to dye 100 gallons of water. Put a little of that on your sandwich, and he'll be peeing and sweating bright red for a day or two. That ought to make him stand out.
Link Posted: 2/22/2007 11:15:11 AM EST

Originally Posted By MAT-49:

Originally Posted By anr6t:
Leave some ham out in the sun for a few days. Make a ham sandwich out of it, and leave it where the thief can find it. You can identify him/her when he's out from work for 3 days with food poisoning.


Just use Peter Pan peanut butter.


I've got 2 jars of that magic 21116 batch on my counter to be returned, want some?
Link Posted: 2/22/2007 11:15:18 AM EST
Grind up a couple viagra and sprinkle on what ever they seam to like the most you will know it is for sure!!!
Link Posted: 2/22/2007 11:16:19 AM EST
My grandfather did the ex-lax chocolate bar back in the day when he used to work in the coal mines here in IL... from what I've been told, having to take an emergency core dump is not a good thing when you're 2 miles underground.

Link Posted: 2/22/2007 11:19:04 AM EST
Carefully open an "oreo" type cookie and very carefully cut a cicle out of the frosting leaving a ring of frosting on one side of the cookie. Fill the void with the filling of your choice. I like ground red pepper, but you may be more evil than that. Put the two halves back together again and put into a baggie in your lunch bag.


Hilarity ensues...



efxguy
Link Posted: 2/22/2007 11:21:28 AM EST
[Last Edit: 2/22/2007 11:22:27 AM EST by the_ak_kid]
hollow out a little puddle inside your oreo's, and fill it Tabasco....just tell him you like your food hot!



ETA: Dammit, I got beat.
Link Posted: 2/22/2007 11:26:46 AM EST
I would try something very bad like some kind of modified trap
Link Posted: 2/22/2007 11:30:50 AM EST

Originally Posted By GabbasaurusRex:
Ex-lax brownies usually do the trick.


although it's technically a felony to put chemicals like that in food....

But I don't know about laws where the food is supposed to be your own.
Link Posted: 2/22/2007 11:32:41 AM EST
[Last Edit: 2/22/2007 11:33:48 AM EST by BaxterStockman]

Originally Posted By Greenfeet:

Originally Posted By GabbasaurusRex:
Ex-lax brownies usually do the trick.


although it's technically a felony to put chemicals like that in food....

But I don't know about laws where the food is supposed to be your own.


hell, if you get questioned after the fact, just say it's difficult for you to swallow the pills, so you bake them into brownies for ease of consumption. You had no idea someone was going to steal your medicinal brownies.

eta: better yet, say you have to take your ex-lax in the middle of the day but it's embarrassing to do it out in the open.
Link Posted: 2/23/2007 5:06:01 AM EST
[Last Edit: 2/23/2007 5:06:13 AM EST by Admiral_Crunch]

Originally Posted By Greenfeet:

Originally Posted By GabbasaurusRex:
Ex-lax brownies usually do the trick.


although it's technically a felony to put chemicals like that in food....

But I don't know about laws where the food is supposed to be your own.


I wouldn't write my name on the bag or anything. No way to prove whose food it was, unless they want to start dusting for prints, and I doubt the police are going to get that involved.
Link Posted: 2/23/2007 5:07:53 AM EST
Find the most insane hot sauce and put about a pound of it into a sandwich.
Link Posted: 2/23/2007 5:12:16 AM EST
Mayo + Sun + 4 Days + Cat Food "Tuna" =
Link Posted: 2/23/2007 5:15:39 AM EST
Link Posted: 2/23/2007 5:17:56 AM EST

Originally Posted By SJSAMPLE:
Epicac is a bitch.


Ground up Dulcolax tablets are even worse. They are enteric coated for a DAMN good reason.
Link Posted: 2/23/2007 5:21:43 AM EST
www.peppers.com

Had a friend who put pepper oil on his food. The instructions said no more that a drop or two. He put 20.
Link Posted: 2/23/2007 5:30:28 AM EST
Exlax in anything works good.
Link Posted: 2/23/2007 7:32:32 AM EST
back when I was younger I lived at this place that was the social gathering/hangout spot for all our friends and their friends. bastards kept taking things from our fridge. Finally got fed up with it so I bought a bottle of hawaiian punch, drank some and then replaced the missing punch with a small bottle of syrup of ipecac. About a week later, half the bottle was gone, and there was a trail of vomit out the door, down three flights of stairs and down the sidewalk. I had no idea it was physically possible to hold that much vomit! good times I tell ya...
Link Posted: 2/23/2007 7:36:15 AM EST
Pick out something good to take in. Run a batch in it. Don't leave your name on it. After it is gone, post an anonymous note describing your dirty deed. Enjoy your cold dish of revenge.
Link Posted: 2/23/2007 7:42:21 AM EST

Originally Posted By ArimoDave:
Or, grind-up a few Niacin supplement tablets in which to flavor the food. Should give the perp a good case of red-face.

Dave.


OMG I am still laughing... that would be the best ownage I could think of.

(You owe me a new keyboard)
Link Posted: 2/23/2007 7:46:30 AM EST
Boot polish on the bottom of a sandwich is good. Leaves a mark.
Link Posted: 2/23/2007 7:46:42 AM EST
I had a problem with people stealing my food when I was stationed overseas.

I'm Chinese and my buddies know it. So I started labeling my food with "Diced Chicken, strips of dog meat with noodles." I never had a problem afterwards.

Another time, I had a problem with officers taking my fav coffee cup. I put a waterproof label on it that said, " Strep-throat infected cup, DO NOT USE."

Again, never had a problem since then.
Link Posted: 2/23/2007 7:54:16 AM EST
Link Posted: 2/23/2007 8:07:20 AM EST
Go to a health food store and get a bottle of APPLE PECTIN tablets. Not expensive at all. Pulverize the tablets into powder and mix the powder in any food or drink. APPLE PECTIN is a vitamin supplement for fiber, but pectin is the stuff in apples that causes gas = fart. ONE tablet will make plenty of gas. Two or three powdered tablets of this in food / drink will cause LOUD and LONG stinkies!!!!! voyola!!!!! you have found the thief!
Link Posted: 2/23/2007 8:08:45 AM EST
[Last Edit: 2/23/2007 8:10:26 AM EST by callgood]
Two words-

Gentian Violet

I had a problem with beer disappearing from my cooler. A single Budweiser on top of the ice and a stern warning to my date to ONLY drink Miller solved my problem.

Later that night I heard someone say, "Drinsky's upstairs burshing his teeth, and his mouth is all PURPLE!"

Gentian violet's worst common side effect is staining skin and cloth, but if used on ulcerations or open wounds it can cause tattooing. It is generally considered safe for use on children and breastfeeding mothers. It has even been applied to the mouth and lips of premature infants, and has a long history of safe use. Many have recommended it for thrush on the nipple, and La Leche League lists gentian violet as a possible alternative.[1] However, in large quantities, gentian violet may lead to ulceration of a baby's mouth and throat and is linked with mouth cancer. Dr. Sears recommends using it sparingly.[2] Gentian violet has also been linked to cancer in the digestive tract of other animals.[3]

When using gentian in order to purple skin or jackets, care should be taken to mix only low concentrations of the crystal into warm water. This avoids the material attaining a golden hue. Additionally, jackets with a waterproof coating should be scrubbed lightly with a scrub pad or light grade sand paper before dyeing.[4]

Link Posted: 2/23/2007 9:03:27 AM EST
This worked for me.

Go to your local police supply store, buy the dusting powder (can't remember the brand I used right now) that turns their hands any of a variety of colors the next time they wash their hands.

Make a sandwich. Put sandwich in a wrap of some type and then dust the outside of the wrap. Put the wrapped sandwich inside another container.

Wait.

"Hey Steve, what happened to your hands?"



Link Posted: 2/23/2007 9:13:28 AM EST
I worked with a guy that got tired of having his dr peppers stolen so he took a dr pepper can and drilled a hole in the bottom and then filled it up with skoal spit and then sealed it with rtv .
Link Posted: 2/23/2007 9:15:05 AM EST
Put in a wireless webcam to watch the refriDgerator. Nothing says owned like a video at the next employee meeting.
Link Posted: 2/23/2007 9:15:13 AM EST

Originally Posted By ferretrodeo:
www.peppers.com

Had a friend who put pepper oil on his food. The instructions said no more that a drop or two. He put 20.


Is this why you are referring to him in the past tense?
Link Posted: 2/23/2007 9:19:16 AM EST

Originally Posted By Houstons_Problem:

Originally Posted By ferretrodeo:
www.peppers.com

Had a friend who put pepper oil on his food. The instructions said no more that a drop or two. He put 20.


Is this why you are referring to him in the past tense?


Link Posted: 2/23/2007 10:13:11 AM EST

Originally Posted By V-Match:
ham & cheese sandwich w/ gojo substituted for the mayo...

I can think of something else that would mix nicely with the mayo! Then, if you found out who it was, you could ask them how your "man-juice" tasted! Ahh......sweet revenge.
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