After be inspired by Fat_McNastys thread here, I thought that we could all get together and compile our favorite assmonkey recipies. I'll start by reiterating


I can tell you from first hand experience that assmonkey is a damn fine meat. It's a red meat, but not gamey, and very tender with a mild aroma. Best cooked after a 24-48 hour marinade and put on a rotissery for about an hour. You want to make sure it's cooked, but not well-done. Medium is best. Or if you can't get a rotissery, then stick it in the oven on 400 for 55 minutes. Cajun marinade injections work well when using the oven method. Make sure your side dish is a goat feta and spinach salad. Cover the assmonkey well with a habenero mango salsa. The mango makes it sweet and it won't cut the heat of the salsa.

When using the cajun marinade method:

The trick is not to kill them right away. This may become difficult, because as you all know, they can be hard to handle when wounded and still kicking. The secret of getting the cajun marinade in the beast is as follows (I should be charging money for this): Have the assmonkey tied on a table with the marinade in a large container hanging from the ceiling and tubing coming from said container. As you start to gut and clean the assmonkey make sure that the heart is still beating (if not, then this procedure is for not). Make a small cut in apex of heart and right atrium. Insert the tube from the cajun marinade into the apex. Let gravity take over and the marinade shall flow through the assmonkey. Continue this for at least 1min. 30sec. or until there is no longer any blood coming from the right atrium. Now the marinade will have completely saturated the assmonkey. Remove all internal organs and butcher as you would anything else.

in short you profuse the little bastard

what? you people have no recipies????

I like my grilled on a panini. With a side of fries!

You're treating this as if it's some sort of joke.

Quoted: You're treating this as if it's some sort of joke.

I know it's not a joke. I just wanted more recipies for the wife to cook up. Is that so wrong?

If you make assmonkey chili you MUST add beans!