THE most horrible NO scenario just struck me!!!

[ARCHIVED THREAD] - THE most horrible NO scenario just struck me!!!

Posted: 9/6/2005 11:29:35 AM EDT

What if during the storm surge........a baby whale got washed into NO? What would we do? How could it survive? Who would feed it? What does it's mommy think? What if a SUV runs over it? What if a hungry person ate it? The what ifs are mind boggling.

Posted: 9/6/2005 11:30:51 AM EDT

[#1]

Posted: 9/6/2005 11:32:11 AM EDT

[#2]

Im sure sean penn would save it.

Posted: 9/6/2005 11:32:51 AM EDT

[#3]

Most horrible?

Nope.

Above ground graves....

think zombies in the easy open can.

Posted: 9/6/2005 11:33:38 AM EDT

[#4]

I was thinking Zombies as in the 28 Days Later type zombies.

Posted: 9/6/2005 11:34:03 AM EDT

[#5]

What if Sean Penn's boat prop struck the poor thing???

Posted: 9/6/2005 11:34:48 AM EDT

[#6]

Looters would've got it.

Posted: 9/6/2005 11:36:31 AM EDT

[#7]

Those looters will make whale oil lamps and fat-back out of that little beast.

Posted: 9/6/2005 11:37:57 AM EDT

[#8]

BOOM!

perp.com/whale/

Posted: 9/6/2005 11:39:33 AM EDT

[#9]

That's easy. PETA would blame Bush for the whales misfortune.

Posted: 9/6/2005 11:45:50 AM EDT

[#10]

I just hope Sean finds him before the gators do.

Posted: 9/6/2005 11:48:25 AM EDT

[#11]

SAVE THE WHite mALES

Posted: 9/6/2005 1:36:51 PM EDT

[#12]

WHat if it was a big whale that ate people as it swam around NO...........

Posted: 9/6/2005 1:39:16 PM EDT

[#13]

Quoted:
What if a hungry person ate it?

"A" hungry person ate it?

That would have to be one really, really hungry person !!!

Posted: 9/6/2005 1:50:07 PM EDT

[#14]

Another thing that got forgotten was the fact that against all probability a sperm whale had suddenly been called into existence several miles above the surface of an alien planet.

And since this is not a naturally tenable position for a whale, this poor innocent creature had very little time to come to terms with its identity as a whale before it then had to come to terms with not being a whale any more.

This is a complete record of its thoughts from the moment it began its life till the moment it ended it.

Ah ... ! What's happening? it thought.

Er, excuse me, who am I?

Hello?

Why am I here? What's my purpose in life?

What do I mean by who am I?

Calm down, get a grip now ... oh! this is an interesting sensation, what is it? It's a sort of ... yawning, tingling sensation in my ... my ... well I suppose I'd better start finding names for things if I want to make any headway in what for the sake of what I shall call an argument I shall call the world, so let's call it my stomach.

Good. Ooooh, it's getting quite strong. And hey, what's about this whistling roaring sound going past what I'm suddenly going to call my head? Perhaps I can call that ... wind! Is that a good name? It'll do ... perhaps I can find a better name for it later when I've found out what it's for. It must be something very important because there certainly seems to be a hell of a lot of it. Hey! What's this thing? This ... let's call it a tail - yeah, tail. Hey! I can can really thrash it about pretty good can't I? Wow! Wow! That feels great! Doesn't seem to achieve very much but I'll probably find out what it's for later on. Now - have I built up any coherent picture of things yet?

No.

Never mind, hey, this is really exciting, so much to find out about, so much to look forward to, I'm quite dizzy with anticipation ...

Or is it the wind?

There really is a lot of that now isn't it?

And wow! Hey! What's this thing suddenly coming towards me very fast? Very very fast. So big and flat and round, it needs a big wide sounding name like ... ow ... ound ... round ... ground! That's it! That's a good name - ground!

I wonder if it will be friends with me?

And the rest, after a sudden wet thud, was silence.

Posted: 9/6/2005 1:54:48 PM EDT

[#15]

I read a report that a 3' shark had been sluiced thru one of the breaks in the levees. I had hoped it would find the survivors of the POS Pennafore disaster and there would be a repeat of the USS Indianapolis. Alas, it didn't happen. Perhaps it is still out there, lurking, waiting for the next Hollyweirdite to come along. DADA.DADA.DADADADADADADA.

Posted: 9/6/2005 1:56:00 PM EDT

[#16]

I've seen a few down there that could make a Dagwood sammich out of a baby whale and have moma for dessert.

Posted: 9/6/2005 2:01:26 PM EDT

[#17]

Quoted:
Another thing that got forgotten was the fact that against all probability a sperm whale had suddenly been called into existence several miles above the surface of an alien planet.

And since this is not a naturally tenable position for a whale, this poor innocent creature had very little time to come to terms with its identity as a whale before it then had to come to terms with not being a whale any more.

This is a complete record of its thoughts from the moment it began its life till the moment it ended it.

Ah ... ! What's happening? it thought.

Er, excuse me, who am I?

Hello?

Why am I here? What's my purpose in life?

What do I mean by who am I?

Calm down, get a grip now ... oh! this is an interesting sensation, what is it? It's a sort of ... yawning, tingling sensation in my ... my ... well I suppose I'd better start finding names for things if I want to make any headway in what for the sake of what I shall call an argument I shall call the world, so let's call it my stomach.

Good. Ooooh, it's getting quite strong. And hey, what's about this whistling roaring sound going past what I'm suddenly going to call my head? Perhaps I can call that ... wind! Is that a good name? It'll do ... perhaps I can find a better name for it later when I've found out what it's for. It must be something very important because there certainly seems to be a hell of a lot of it. Hey! What's this thing? This ... let's call it a tail - yeah, tail. Hey! I can can really thrash it about pretty good can't I? Wow! Wow! That feels great! Doesn't seem to achieve very much but I'll probably find out what it's for later on. Now - have I built up any coherent picture of things yet?

No.

Never mind, hey, this is really exciting, so much to find out about, so much to look forward to, I'm quite dizzy with anticipation ...

Or is it the wind?

There really is a lot of that now isn't it?

And wow! Hey! What's this thing suddenly coming towards me very fast? Very very fast. So big and flat and round, it needs a big wide sounding name like ... ow ... ound ... round ... ground! That's it! That's a good name - ground!

I wonder if it will be friends with me?

And the rest, after a sudden wet thud, was silence.

Just think, some people in NO could have been saved if they just used their towels to hitch a ride.

Posted: 9/6/2005 2:02:50 PM EDT

[#18]

The whale would take priority over all other issues

Posted: 9/6/2005 2:09:32 PM EDT

[#19]

it would die from the enviornmental disaster of leaking oil and rotting bodies caused by george bush. DU would hold a candlelight vigil in it's honor.

Posted: 9/6/2005 2:11:24 PM EDT

[#20]

What if a pack of a hundred angry sharks got washed into and stuck in NO, and fed on the looters wading through the waters? That would be sweet.

Posted: 9/6/2005 2:25:41 PM EDT

[#21]

Quoted:
What if during the storm surge........a baby whale got washed into NO? What would we do? How could it survive? Who would feed it? What does it's mommy think? What if a SUV runs over it? What if a hungry person ate it? The what ifs are mind boggling.

It would make Geraldo cry ....

Posted: 9/6/2005 2:27:03 PM EDT

[#22]

I'd hit it like a baby seal.

Posted: 9/6/2005 2:28:17 PM EDT

[#23]

But what if it were a Zombie Whale?

Posted: 9/6/2005 3:51:59 PM EDT

[#24]

Sometimes I wonder if topics like this are created by people that have been smokin' weed

Posted: 9/6/2005 4:39:40 PM EDT

[#25]

Quoted:
Quoted:
What if a hungry person ate it?

"A" hungry person ate it?

That would have to be one really, really hungry person !!!

Well, Oprah was in NO.....

Posted: 9/6/2005 4:42:16 PM EDT

[#26]

Quoted:
Quoted:
Quoted:
What if a hungry person ate it?

"A" hungry person ate it?

That would have to be one really, really hungry person !!!

Well, Oprah was in NO.....

I've heard a lot of things said about Oprah, but never that she was a cannibal.

Posted: 9/6/2005 4:42:27 PM EDT

[#27]

Quoted:
I'd hit it like a baby seal.

Club Seals NOT Sandwiches!

Posted: 9/6/2005 4:43:37 PM EDT

[#28]

Quoted:
BOOM!

perp.com/whale/

My favorite explosion film

Posted: 9/6/2005 4:45:27 PM EDT

[#29]

Quoted:
What if during the storm surge........a baby whale got washed into NO? What would we do? How could it survive? Who would feed it? What does it's mommy think? What if a SUV runs over it? What if a hungry person ate it? The what ifs are mind boggling.

Question: What kind of weed is that?

Posted: 9/6/2005 6:55:43 PM EDT

[#30]

Weed? Hmmmm.....we're talking about whales here....sperm types......lantern fuel.....blubber.....all kinds of ugly shit hanging and growing on them.

Posted: 9/6/2005 7:00:01 PM EDT

[#31]

If it had lasers on its head, no one would fudge with it.

Posted: 9/6/2005 7:00:38 PM EDT

[#32]

it would smell really bad

Posted: 9/6/2005 7:02:35 PM EDT

[#33]

Quoted:
What if during the storm surge........a baby whale got washed into NO? What would we do? How could it survive? Who would feed it? What does it's mommy think? What if a SUV runs over it? What if a hungry person ate it? The what ifs are mind boggling.

what if it was rapped by crazed cracksoaked gangbangers while geraldo pleaded helplessy on fox and friends to no avail whilst all the time it squeeled like a 50 ton pig?

Posted: 9/6/2005 7:03:17 PM EDT

[#34]

bark

[ARCHIVED THREAD] - THE most horrible NO scenario just struck me!!!

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