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9/19/2017 7:27:10 PM
Posted: 2/11/2006 7:45:04 PM EDT
It was rainy and cold this morning so my 8 yo son and I were sitting in his room playing Playstation 2. The night before at a cookout I had eaten about 3 helpings of cabbage based coleslaw. Well I ripped loose a very impressive string of farts. We're both laughing then IT hits. I'm talking about roadkill type odor here, I was appalled at myself. He tries to run away so I grab him so he can stay there and really appreciate it you know. Well I guess the combination of the laughing and then gagging at the smell got him and he threw up all over the floor Then continued laughing. I was laughing the whole time while cleaning the carpet.

Never made anybody puke from a fart before, it is almost like achieving some kind of lifelong goal. You hear people say "I was about to puke from the smell" just never seen it happen before. Everyone has been laughing about it all day, he thought it was funny as hell too.
Link Posted: 2/11/2006 7:46:01 PM EDT
Link Posted: 2/11/2006 7:46:33 PM EDT
HAHAHHAHAHHAA
Link Posted: 2/11/2006 7:47:26 PM EDT
Thats just damn evil

Link Posted: 2/11/2006 7:47:34 PM EDT
The joys of fatherhood.
Link Posted: 2/11/2006 7:47:43 PM EDT
Ah, male bonding! I'd cry, if it weren't so unmanly!
Link Posted: 2/11/2006 7:47:43 PM EDT
That is a moment he will remember forever.....sniff....
Link Posted: 2/11/2006 7:48:39 PM EDT






Link Posted: 2/11/2006 7:48:55 PM EDT
So you made your 8 year old kid throw up from a fart and your proud...I call that child abuse and I guess your teaching him some good habits...LOL
Link Posted: 2/11/2006 7:51:57 PM EDT
Thats hilarious!

I ripped one when I was in Korea (after a long night of kimchee, soju, and unidentifiable Korean foodstuffs) that will live in my memory forever. I cleared out our launch truck in the middle of a launch, I almost made myself puke it was so rancid.
Link Posted: 2/11/2006 7:53:47 PM EDT

Originally Posted By bulldog1967:
That is a moment he will remember forever.....sniff....



Well, perhaps without the sniff, as it were.

G
Link Posted: 2/11/2006 7:54:02 PM EDT

Good work, male bonding


girls just don't (and wouldn't) understand
Link Posted: 2/11/2006 7:55:52 PM EDT
Hooah!
Link Posted: 2/11/2006 7:56:42 PM EDT
One has not truly lived until they've dry-heaved at the smell of their own fart.
Link Posted: 2/11/2006 7:57:19 PM EDT
That is really sick man....to but your son through that tramatic experience.....one I'm sure he'll be telling his kids....

Farts are the funniest things....I think God gave us farts just so we can laugh sometimes....when I was in school someone would crack one and I just couldn't stop laughing...it got so bad that kids started laughing at me laughing....then guess who stayed for detention for insighting a riot.....and I didn't even crack the fart.

It's good that you spend quality time with your kids....even laughing while cleaning up the puke.....that's great.

Laugh on!!!
Link Posted: 2/11/2006 8:01:25 PM EDT
Somehow, I just never get this type of behavior........
Link Posted: 2/11/2006 8:04:16 PM EDT
Your man card has been renewed!
Link Posted: 2/11/2006 8:12:27 PM EDT

Originally Posted By fight4yourrights:
Somehow, I just never get this type of behavior........



At the last unit I was stationed at we took great pride in our bodily gases. You always tried to catch someone in a confined area if you knew you had "it" that day. Framerooms, crawl spaces, and vehicle cabs were popular spaces so that the person was trapped. Cropdusting people's desks is also very effective.
Link Posted: 2/11/2006 8:18:17 PM EDT
After three days of consuming nothing but bratwurst and German beer and sleeping in an Escort station wagon at Octoberfest '97 in Munich, I made a girl puke while we were standing in line waiting to be processed on to the plane going back to Turkey.
Link Posted: 2/11/2006 8:20:07 PM EDT
[Last Edit: 2/11/2006 8:21:53 PM EDT by JS1050]
My two-year-old has recently learned to giggle when he pulls daddy's finger. My wife just rolls her eyes.

BTW, your "father of the year" award is in the mail.

Potty humor rocks.

ETA: We used to have a morning meeting with 15-20 guys. If you walked out of the room and entered back in the stench would over take you.

There's something about chow hall food that fosters good gas.
Link Posted: 2/11/2006 8:20:53 PM EDT
Man!!! I'm envious!!! I was only able to make my daughter say, Mommy!! My nose!!!!
Link Posted: 2/11/2006 8:21:55 PM EDT
I remember at a conference for work, I was in the hotel public bathroom letting it rip, when I heaed somebody enter, pause, then " oh god!" and leave! What satisfaction!
Link Posted: 2/11/2006 8:24:50 PM EDT
Link Posted: 2/11/2006 8:28:04 PM EDT
Assault with cabbage gas? Hope he downs a quart of kimchee and returns the favor.
Link Posted: 2/11/2006 8:37:55 PM EDT


everyone has a special talent
Link Posted: 2/11/2006 8:42:24 PM EDT

Originally Posted By LANCEMAN:

Originally Posted By fight4yourrights:
Somehow, I just never get this type of behavior........



At the last unit I was stationed at we took great pride in our bodily gases. You always tried to catch someone in a confined area if you knew you had "it" that day. Framerooms, crawl spaces, and vehicle cabs were popular spaces so that the person was trapped. Cropdusting people's desks is also very effective.




Bastage!

Ban cropdusting, it's for the childeren.
Link Posted: 2/11/2006 8:57:19 PM EDT

Originally Posted By danpass:
Good work, male bonding hr


I beg to differ.
I thought it was hilarious. I had a nickname in college with
my boyfriend's friends. Imagine a room full of college boys
and one girl; who has the raunchiest farts of them all, that's
right the girl. I wasn't called Fart Queen for no reason! Those
guys acted like it disgusted them, but I know they respected
me much more for it than if I was grossed out by their farts.
There's nothing funnier than a fart.
Link Posted: 2/11/2006 9:14:15 PM EDT
Laughter with tears....



Thanks man, I needed that.
Link Posted: 2/11/2006 9:15:03 PM EDT
OK Im BLAAGH
that is!
Link Posted: 2/11/2006 9:33:03 PM EDT

Originally Posted By Chairborne:

I ripped one when I was in Korea (after a long night of kimchee, soju, and unidentifiable Korean foodstuffs) that will live in my memory forever. I cleared out our launch truck in the middle of a launch, I almost made myself puke it was so rancid.



I really dont know what in the hell it is, but it seems that whenever you are in a set of BDU's, and in a Military veh, Your farts always take on a extra strong punch... I have cleared out M577's without any prob.
Link Posted: 2/13/2006 7:20:06 PM EDT

Originally Posted By Reapers_Wife:

Originally Posted By danpass:
Good work, male bonding


girls just don't (and wouldn't) understand



I beg to differ.
I thought it was hilarious. I had a nickname in college with
my boyfriend's friends. Imagine a room full of college boys
and one girl; who has the raunchiest farts of them all, that's
right the girl. I wasn't called Fart Queen for no reason! Those
guys acted like it disgusted them, but I know they respected
me much more for it than if I was grossed out by their farts.
There's nothing funnier than a fart.



My ex-wife could probably go toe to toe with you then
Link Posted: 2/13/2006 7:26:56 PM EDT
That does border on child abuse...but it has to be one of the funniest things I have read in while.

My favorite area is the elevator. I let out huge clouds right before my floor when I am in an elevator by myself. Then I walk out and people walk in. Door closes and they are trapped! LOL.
Link Posted: 2/13/2006 7:33:50 PM EDT
[Last Edit: 2/13/2006 7:39:05 PM EDT by lippo]
Jumpin Jesus, I can't believe how immature you people are.

Yeah, that sure is something to be proud of...making your kid puke. What an asshole.

What's your next lifetime achievement? Shitting your pants?

Some of you people need to grow up. Making your kid puke and then be proud of it. Too bad he didn't puke right on your face. I hope someday your kid returns the favor and see how you like it.


Yeah, and your some kind of great father. No wonder kids hate their dads. Going to beat him next? You must be into masocism, from the sounds of it.
Link Posted: 2/13/2006 7:35:08 PM EDT
someone needs to post that video of the guy who pukes on the other guy, causing him to puke, starting a chain reaction of people puking....
Link Posted: 2/13/2006 7:38:31 PM EDT


Thats funny as shit.

What did the Mrs. have to say?
Link Posted: 2/13/2006 7:42:18 PM EDT

Originally Posted By lippo:
Jumpin Jesus, I can't believe how immature you people are.

Yeah, that sure is something to be proud of...making your kid puke. What an asshole.

What's your next lifetime achievement? Shitting your pants?

Some of you people need to grow up. Making your kid puke and then be proud of it. Too bad he didn't puke right on your face. I hope someday your kid returns the favor and see how you like it.



Please relinquish your man card now. Maybe it would have been awful if he cried but he thought it was one of the funniest things ever. If he had puked on me it would have made it that much funnier IMO. I would have deserved it
Link Posted: 2/13/2006 7:45:18 PM EDT
[Last Edit: 2/13/2006 7:47:47 PM EDT by Dilbert_556]
I was about halfway through an hour long briefing to a US Congressman when I just couldn't hold back any longer, and I silenced a good one. We were in a medium/small sized conference room and that puppy filled the whole thing with the nastiest smell you can imagine.

At first no one reacted, and I just kept on talking. Finally it got so bad that the Congressman said "Oh my!" After the laughter died down, he said "It's gratifying to know that my constituents are so well fed".

I never owned up to it to my boss, and to this day he thinks the Congressman did it!
Link Posted: 2/13/2006 7:48:49 PM EDT

Originally Posted By LANCEMAN:

Originally Posted By lippo:
Jumpin Jesus, I can't believe how immature you people are.

Yeah, that sure is something to be proud of...making your kid puke. What an asshole.

What's your next lifetime achievement? Shitting your pants?

Some of you people need to grow up. Making your kid puke and then be proud of it. Too bad he didn't puke right on your face. I hope someday your kid returns the favor and see how you like it.



Please relinquish your man card now. Maybe it would have been awful if he cried but he thought it was one of the funniest things ever. If he had puked on me it would have made it that much funnier IMO. I would have deserved it




Yeah, and that makes you really fucking mature doesn't it?

Sounds like your kid is learning from a master.
Link Posted: 2/13/2006 8:00:03 PM EDT

Originally Posted By lippo:

Originally Posted By LANCEMAN:

Originally Posted By lippo:
Jumpin Jesus, I can't believe how immature you people are.

Yeah, that sure is something to be proud of...making your kid puke. What an asshole.

What's your next lifetime achievement? Shitting your pants?

Some of you people need to grow up. Making your kid puke and then be proud of it. Too bad he didn't puke right on your face. I hope someday your kid returns the favor and see how you like it.



Please relinquish your man card now. Maybe it would have been awful if he cried but he thought it was one of the funniest things ever. If he had puked on me it would have made it that much funnier IMO. I would have deserved it




Yeah, and that makes you really fucking mature doesn't it?

Sounds like your kid is learning from a master.



Lighten up, geez!

I laughed so hard, it took 5 minutes just to finish reading the first post.
Link Posted: 2/13/2006 8:37:39 PM EDT

Originally Posted By VooDoo3dfx:


Thats funny as shit.

What did the Mrs. have to say?



She ain't around, he maybe sees her once a month if she shows up
Link Posted: 2/13/2006 8:39:39 PM EDT
Be very proud.
Link Posted: 2/13/2006 9:47:34 PM EDT
That is funny.
Link Posted: 2/13/2006 10:46:36 PM EDT
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