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Posted: 6/18/2014 8:35:16 AM EDT
My daughter just turned 13 and like most kids these days she is all into the social media stuff like snap chat and so on. When she turned 13 I told her she could get a facebook account but I want her user name and password. And while we are at it I said I want the username for those other sites too. She has always been a great kid and very mature for her age. We have a great relationship with her , no major problems what so ever and a straight A student. That being said I think when it comes to these internet sites , I should be able to monitor what is going on.....not so much because I dont trust her but because at 13 I dont think she understands what kind of evil shit is lurking out there. She obviously is against it and says its a total invasion of her privacy and why am I doing this when she has never given me a reason not to trust her. So first of all does anyone think I am doing the wrong thing by requiring the passwords. ( I would be surprised) Second, any good ideas on how to smooth this over without coming off like a overprotective parent or the " because I said so" dad. I know when my parents pulled the "because I said so" card it just made me resentful and made me rebel more. Any ideas?
Link Posted: 6/18/2014 8:36:41 AM EDT
She'll have an duplicate account you don't know about. Find it, friend it under a fake name and never, ever mention something you know only from that duplicate account.

Kharn
Link Posted: 6/18/2014 8:44:59 AM EDT
I'd frame it as a "trust is to be earned" thing. Tell her that if she acts responsibly for x amount of time, she'll be allowed to change the passwords and keep them to herself.

Sounds like you're doing a good job.
Link Posted: 6/18/2014 8:49:39 AM EDT
Learn how to use your router and monitor the sites visited, block the ones you don't want visited.

For the phone, surprise inspections on a regular basis.
Link Posted: 6/18/2014 9:25:42 AM EDT
Remind her that trust, especially with all the internet predation going on, NEEDS to be verified. It's not that you don't trust her -it's because you don't trust the mother fuckers on the other side of the keyboard. You can use free services to monitor and block certain types of traffic. Try using opendns.org as a passive tool inspection tool if necessary.
Link Posted: 6/19/2014 8:55:59 AM EDT
Thanks guys. Im not really worried about her going on websites she knows is wrong....maybe im being naive but so far she hasnt given me a reason to think otherwise. Its more of an issue of who is she "friending" or "following" or whatever. The only way I can see to keep tabs on that would be to get access to her account or like someone suggested make up a fake account and follow her myself. Thats a good idea!
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