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Posted: 4/23/2013 2:11:29 PM EDT
About to be 6yo son came home from school yesterday. Wife asked him to watch his little brother (he's 5 months and on the verge of crawling) for a few minutes while she made a phone call.



(Completely straight faced and flippantly) "Alright mommy! Bros before hos!"

Wife:



She said she was trying not to crack up when she told him that was a bad thing to say.



I explained (generically) what a "ho" was when I got home and why it wasn't a good word and that we weren't going to use it anymore.



I still giggle thinking about that little exchange.
Link Posted: 4/23/2013 2:13:39 PM EDT
I hope you gave him a high five and juice box.
Link Posted: 4/23/2013 2:13:47 PM EDT
Lol
Link Posted: 4/23/2013 2:13:53 PM EDT
Link Posted: 4/23/2013 2:14:12 PM EDT
Kids say the darndest things.
Link Posted: 4/23/2013 2:16:10 PM EDT
He was probably just all jacked up from threatening a teacher's aid with his finger gun.
Link Posted: 4/23/2013 2:16:25 PM EDT
Did your 6 year old happen to make a gun gesture at a parent volunteer in his class today?
Link Posted: 4/23/2013 2:17:59 PM EDT
Link Posted: 4/23/2013 2:18:15 PM EDT
[Last Edit: 4/23/2013 2:20:03 PM EDT by JSteensen]




Originally Posted By woozman:

Did your 6 year old happen to make a gun gesture at a parent volunteer in his class today?




Yeah, that thread reminded me of this.



And no. I don't raise disrespectful children.
Link Posted: 4/23/2013 2:19:08 PM EDT
Link Posted: 4/23/2013 2:24:00 PM EDT
I still remember calling my little sister a cock sucker right infront of my mom one day after school. ( sis was approx. 5yo and I'd guess I was 7-8 )

I learned real quick that new words you learn at recess should not always follow you home.
Link Posted: 4/23/2013 2:24:29 PM EDT
Link Posted: 4/23/2013 2:27:05 PM EDT




Originally Posted By Booze:

I hope you gave him a high five and juice box.




After he finished his chores (tidying up the family room and his room) we sat down and turned allen keys on a little cheap robot project we are doing together.



I'm thinking I'm going to save up to buy him the lego mindstorms generation 3 (coming out in fall) for Christmas....or start working on a real (Rasberry Pi powered) robot once I get past all the legal stuff and can get a 3D printer for the parts and gears and such.
Link Posted: 4/23/2013 2:31:30 PM EDT
Link Posted: 4/23/2013 2:32:32 PM EDT
Originally Posted By StrkAliteN:
I still remember calling my little sister a cock sucker right infront of my mom one day after school. ( sis was approx. 5yo and I'd guess I was 7-8 )

I learned real quick that new words you learn at recess should not always follow you home.


Same thing when I was very young and called my dad a pussy!
Link Posted: 4/23/2013 2:49:42 PM EDT
Originally Posted By Booze:
I hope you gave him a high five and juice box.


First post wins!
Link Posted: 4/23/2013 3:03:39 PM EDT
Yea this made my day thanks for the story op
Link Posted: 4/23/2013 3:13:23 PM EDT
My five year old niece sat on her mom's lap and farted. Her mom goes "We talked about this before."

She goes "Sorry, I don't remember that conversation."
Link Posted: 4/23/2013 4:02:29 PM EDT
Link Posted: 4/23/2013 4:08:15 PM EDT
I can remember sitting at the dinner table as a kindergartener and saying to my little sister "don't be a fucking twat, please pass the rolls".

Mom's arm moved so fast that the backhand was actually a blur. I was stunned, because I had said "please" after all

Link Posted: 4/23/2013 4:13:53 PM EDT
Good one.
Link Posted: 4/23/2013 4:15:15 PM EDT
Don't make a big deal about it.
If he gets a reaction, he will do it again.
Link Posted: 4/23/2013 4:15:43 PM EDT
Link Posted: 4/23/2013 4:16:27 PM EDT
awesome









my 2 1/2 year old niece comes running in the other day, stops,  stars right at me and yells at the top of her lungs  "Bitches BE CRAY"  








turned around and ran back out..  










i was beside myself.  
Link Posted: 4/23/2013 4:16:51 PM EDT
my son is 5 almost 6 and I cant believe some of the things he knows/says



came home carrying a chopsaw and he says "what the hell is that"



playing angry birds on my wifes Iphone and blurts our "god damn it"



the last thing you want them to repeat seems to be what they key in on
Link Posted: 4/23/2013 4:20:41 PM EDT
Originally Posted By groovyrascal:
Kids say the darndest things.


Link Posted: 4/23/2013 4:21:32 PM EDT
Fpni
Link Posted: 4/23/2013 4:21:50 PM EDT
Originally Posted By JSteensen:

Originally Posted By woozman:
Did your 6 year old happen to make a gun gesture at a parent volunteer in his class today?


Yeah, that thread reminded me of this.

And no. I don't raise disrespectful children.


Can i trade my current friend for you?
Link Posted: 4/23/2013 4:22:15 PM EDT
My 1st grade teacher was not happy when I called her a penis wrinkle.
The principal was not happy when my dad laughed after being told.
My older brother was not happy when my mom found out.
Link Posted: 4/23/2013 4:23:37 PM EDT
slip him some cookies under the table
Link Posted: 4/23/2013 4:29:17 PM EDT
Link Posted: 4/23/2013 4:31:11 PM EDT
Originally Posted By JA_Magnum:
He was probably just all jacked up from threatening a teacher's aid with his finger gun.


rolf
Link Posted: 4/23/2013 4:50:11 PM EDT
Originally Posted By JSteensen:
About to be 6yo son came home from school yesterday. Wife asked him to watch his little brother (he's 5 months and on the verge of crawling) for a few minutes while she made a phone call.




Pics of wife aren't loading..........................    
Link Posted: 4/23/2013 5:40:43 PM EDT
when son was about 3 we were driving threw a parking lot up north on Christmas morning and it was full of pot holes and ice chunks, so the truck was bouncing and rocking like a boat in a bad storm, he was almost a sleep, woke up and goes, "FUCK man.. what the fuck are you doin?''  my wife looked at me like and we both busted out laughing....  

another time not too long ago i had to stop suddenly because some car decided to suddenly slow down and turn with no blinker. and my son busts out, " nice blinker asshole "

we have the talk after every time he has a little adult language that, he only ever talks like that around me and no once else, that it is guy talk only.  so far so good. every teacher/ parent thats meet him at school raves on how well behaved he is and what a good listener. followed by whats my secret....  i look at them like and say good parenting i guess, then they look at me like i laugh and say, hes a carbon copy of me, i act like a child with him unless hes about to come into harm, then im a protector, then a teacher, then back to being his best friend... we run wild everyday. there are no rules, only lessons. he learns right and wrong by trial, error, and experience.

they always seem so confused after i tell them like im feeding the a bunch of chocolate covered shit ... yet my kid is polite, respectful, listens and follows directions. theirs is pouting and super bowl spiking toys when its time to go with tears, then is "walked" by one arm held high down the hall while my son and i jump from patch of colored tile to patch of colored tile to avoid the white tiles because they are lava...

Link Posted: 4/23/2013 5:42:26 PM EDT
Originally Posted By StrkAliteN:
I still remember calling my little sister a cock sucker right infront of my mom one day after school. ( sis was approx. 5yo and I'd guess I was 7-8 )

I learned real quick that new words you learn at recess should not always follow you home.



I learned calling my little brother a dildo was unacceptable the same way.
Link Posted: 4/23/2013 5:44:46 PM EDT
Originally Posted By JA_Magnum:
He was probably just all jacked up from threatening a teacher's aid with his finger gun.


Okay, this made me snicker.

Link Posted: 4/23/2013 5:46:03 PM EDT
[Last Edit: 4/23/2013 5:46:23 PM EDT by wjoutlaw]
Originally Posted By SureShot1313:
when son was about 3 we were driving threw a parking lot up north on Christmas morning and it was full of pot holes and ice chunks, so the truck was bouncing and rocking like a boat in a bad storm, he was almost a sleep, woke up and goes, "FUCK man.. what the fuck are you doin?''  my wife looked at me like and we both busted out laughing....  

another time not too long ago i had to stop suddenly because some car decided to suddenly slow down and turn with no blinker. and my son busts out, " nice blinker asshole "

we have the talk after every time he has a little adult language that, he only ever talks like that around me and no once else, that it is guy talk only.  so far so good. every teacher/ parent thats meet him at school raves on how well behaved he is and what a good listener. followed by whats my secret....  i look at them like and say good parenting i guess, then they look at me like i laugh and say, hes a carbon copy of me, i act like a child with him unless hes about to come into harm, then im a protector, then a teacher, then back to being his best friend... we run wild everyday. there are no rules, only lessons. he learns right and wrong by trial, error, and experience.

they always seem so confused after i tell them like im feeding the a bunch of chocolate covered shit ... yet my kid is polite, respectful, listens and follows directions. theirs is pouting and super bowl spiking toys when its time to go with tears, then is "walked" by one arm held high down the hall while my son and i jump from patch of colored tile to patch of colored tile to avoid the white tiles because they are lava...



You are an awesome dad! Me and my dad's backhand had a pretty close relationship. He said I needed to work on my brain mouth filter. Still don't know what he was taking about.
Link Posted: 4/23/2013 5:46:30 PM EDT
and he got the proper usage too.

Your kid is a fast learner.
Link Posted: 4/23/2013 5:47:19 PM EDT
Originally Posted By Booze:
I hope you gave him a high five and juice box.


Link Posted: 4/23/2013 5:49:10 PM EDT
Lulz
Link Posted: 4/23/2013 5:52:53 PM EDT
My 5 yr old responded to something I said the other day in the car - "Daddy, you shouldn't say holy crap, crap is a bad word.  But it's still better than saying holy shit."
Link Posted: 4/23/2013 5:54:59 PM EDT
Originally Posted By Booze:
I hope you gave him a high five and juice box.


First post and all.
Link Posted: 4/23/2013 10:01:42 PM EDT
My son who's two and change the other day was having some tub time fun when he lets off a little toot complete with bubbles. I look at him and ask him if he had gas and needed to excuse himself? He replies, "No Daddy, I was farting." All straight faced. My wife able to contain herself but I needed to step out of the room for a minute.
Link Posted: 4/23/2013 10:04:04 PM EDT
Why would you ever think that is funny for your child  to say.  I don't care what age they are.
Link Posted: 4/23/2013 10:06:05 PM EDT
Link Posted: 4/23/2013 10:06:35 PM EDT
Originally Posted By Clemsonfan15:
Why would you ever think that is funny for your child  to say.  I don't care what age they are.


You must be everyone's favorite at parties.
Link Posted: 4/23/2013 10:09:04 PM EDT
[Last Edit: 4/23/2013 10:15:27 PM EDT by mean_sartin]
Already learning life's lessons. Move him onto the 3 F's.


Link Posted: 4/23/2013 10:10:31 PM EDT
A kid comes home from school and says to his mom, "Mom I've got a problem." She says "Tell me." He tells her that the boys at school are using 2 words he doesn't understand. She asks him what they are.



He says "well, pussy and bitch".



She says "Oh That's no big deal, pussy is a cat like our little Mittens, and bitch is a female dog like our Sandy."



He thanks her and goes to visit dad in the workshop in the basement.



He says to his dad, "Dad the boys at school are using words I don't know, and I asked mom and I don't think she told me the exact meaning.



Dad says "Son, I told you never to go to mom with these matters, she cant handle them. What are the words?"



He tells him...pussy and bitch.



Dad says "OK" and pulls a Playboy down from the shelf, takes a marker and circles the pubic area of the centerfold and says, "son, everything inside this circle, is pussy."



"OK dad, so what's a bitch?"
"Son" he says, "everything outside that circle."
Link Posted: 4/23/2013 10:13:53 PM EDT
Once at the bank, my daughter called a random black guy a "chocolate man". Me and him had a chuckle, although I was a bit red-faced.



Another time, i was ticked off about something and spouted off "this is crap". Sure enough, a few weeks later, something happened my daughter didn't like and, with a stern face, goes "daddy, this is crap!" I nearly bit through my lip trying to keep from laughing.
Link Posted: 4/23/2013 10:16:25 PM EDT
Originally Posted By Booze:
I hope you gave him a high five and juice box.




Awesome.
Link Posted: 4/23/2013 10:16:26 PM EDT
When my oldest boy was around seven, we were soaking in the hot tub with his little brothers and my wife.  
My wife brought the little ones in and I was relaxing for a moment before getting out.  I told him that its time to go inside and get ready for bed.  

He looked at me with a completely straight face and said "why are you treating me like a bitch".


I could barely keep a straight face while I told him why that was not a good phrase to say.
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