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Posted: 9/18/2004 8:38:35 AM EST
Posted by a lady on another board, and I thought some of you might enjoy it;

[Sing this along to the Gloria Styner tune "I Will
Survive.]

At first I was afraid, I was petrified,
When you said you had 10 inches, Lord I almost died!
But I'd spent so many years just waiting for a man
that long,
That I grew strong, and I knew that I could take you
on....
But there you are, another lie,

I was ready for a big mac and you've bought me a
French fry!
I should have known that it was ********, just a sad
pathetic dream,
Should have known there was no anaconda lurking in
those jeans!

Go on now go, walk out the door,
Don't you promise me 10 inches, then turn up with only
4!
Weren't you a brat to think I wouldn't catch you out!?
Don't you know we' re only joking when we say size
doesn't count???!

(Chorus)

I will survive! I will survive! 'Cos as long as I have
batteries,
My sex life is gonna thrive!
I will always have good sex with a handful of latex!
I will survive! I will survive!. . .Hey! Hey!

[Verse II]

It took all my self control not to laugh out loud,
When I saw your little weiner standing tall and proud!
But to hell with all your egos and to hell with all
your needs
Now I'm saving all my lovin' for a cordless multispeed!

Link Posted: 9/18/2004 8:46:23 AM EST
Knowing the ladies we have here, you ought to be good to go with this one
Link Posted: 9/18/2004 9:00:13 AM EST
That was good!!

Link Posted: 9/18/2004 9:27:20 AM EST
Link Posted: 9/18/2004 9:36:44 AM EST
And now you know why women tend to have problems w/ depth perception...they've always been shown something 4" long and told it is 10"

Link Posted: 9/18/2004 9:53:35 AM EST
I always like to under-promise, and then over-deliver...
Link Posted: 9/18/2004 10:52:42 AM EST

Originally Posted By Persephone:
And now you know why women tend to have problems w/ depth perception...they've always been shown something 4" long and told it is 10"



Priceless - no depth perception - excellent that was better than the song.
Link Posted: 9/18/2004 11:01:32 AM EST
OMG!! I am laughing so hard! Thanks GoGop!!!

Link Posted: 9/18/2004 11:17:06 AM EST

Originally Posted By Persephone:
And now you know why women tend to have problems w/ depth perception...they've always been shown something 4" long and told it is 10"




Now that is funny! LOL
Link Posted: 9/18/2004 2:04:56 PM EST

Originally Posted By MrsGloftoe:

Originally Posted By GoGop:
[Sing this along to the Gloria Styner tune "I Will
Survive.]


Gloria Styner? Is that the love child of Gloria Gaynor (who sang I Will Survive) and Gloria Steinem (the militant feminist)?



I thought the same thing, but who am I to question the lady's post.
Link Posted: 9/18/2004 2:32:59 PM EST
BTW - Nice avatar!
Link Posted: 9/18/2004 2:34:06 PM EST
Love it! that was awesome...

Unfortunately, how true..............



Link Posted: 9/18/2004 3:09:12 PM EST
You into Star Trek Donna? I like the original series and TNG, because of all the ships. The others seemed to be too much about personal conflicts.
Link Posted: 9/18/2004 4:25:12 PM EST
Link Posted: 9/19/2004 3:23:51 AM EST


I LOVED IT!
Link Posted: 9/19/2004 3:44:46 AM EST
Link Posted: 9/19/2004 6:14:26 AM EST
[Last Edit: 9/19/2004 6:15:38 AM EST by Donna]
It is VERY ironic... yesterday I sent an email to an ex boyfriend who didn't treat me very well (emotionally), and I used the real version of this song in the email! I said;

"At first I was afraid - I was petrified
Kept thinkin' I could never live without you by my side..."

[you know the rest!]

And he does know the rest because he really likes that movie "The Replacements" where the whole football team sings this song in jail....

And then later in the day I read this! OMG - it's sorta fitting for him too! I know that's mean, but....

Link Posted: 9/19/2004 8:08:52 PM EST
Loved it!!
Link Posted: 9/20/2004 9:17:27 AM EST
Along these lines....

One day at the local IPSC shoot we were setting targets. The nice woman in charge of our bay tells one guy to set two targets 18" apart. He wanders off, she looks at me and says "I bet he'll put them this far apart" (insert pic of her holding hands 4" apart).

Sure enough, I walked over a couple minutes later and by god he had placed them 4" and was adamant it was 18. I told him I felt sorry for his love life. He still didn't get it.
Link Posted: 9/20/2004 10:45:42 AM EST

Originally Posted By dissipator556:
I always like to under-promise, and then over-deliver...



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