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9/22/2017 12:11:25 AM
Posted: 10/8/2001 6:37:36 AM EDT
I'm not married yet, but I've been with my girlfriend for a few years now and our day is certainly coming... Anyway, I'm actually a bit hesitant to teach her how to use and operate my firearms... See, she has a really bad temper and I'm afraid she would try to use them on me someday, you know, while I'm sleeping... hehe Sounds like a healthy relationship...right? :)
Link Posted: 10/8/2001 6:43:06 AM EDT
I have an ex that I would never have trusted with a firearm. When we were married, she didn't have access to the gun case. On the other hand, my daughter has been shooting since she was eight years old. Watch yourself on this issue. If she has a temper, all she needs to do is get a restraining order against you and you'll never see your guns again.
Link Posted: 10/8/2001 6:50:15 AM EDT
I have been with my wife for over 10 years. I taught her to shoot right at the biginning. Fortunetly my wife is a puncher. When I get outa line she will punch me without thinking twice about it. Shes only about 5 feet tall so there is usaully no damage... except the time she punched me two days after my hernia operation.... that really hurt. Go ahead, teach her to shoot. Just dont give her the combo to the safe. [bounce]
Link Posted: 10/8/2001 6:59:37 AM EDT
Since you brought up the issue of a health relationship, please tell us why you're with this woman? I would not stay with someone I feared like that, no matter how she was in bed. I suggest you think hard before you commit to a lifetime of fear and suspition. Good luck.
Link Posted: 10/8/2001 7:03:42 AM EDT
I don't fear her normally... but I might if she knew how to lock and load my ar or ak or any of my other pieces... Sometimes she flies off the handle at the dumbest little things... her parents spoiled her...
Link Posted: 10/8/2001 7:05:00 AM EDT
Link Posted: 10/8/2001 7:07:19 AM EDT
Link Posted: 10/8/2001 7:28:44 AM EDT
You guys have problems. I trust my wife with everything, she is my best friend, if there is no trust....time to take a wolk!
Link Posted: 10/8/2001 7:37:50 AM EDT
Originally Posted By TheWind: You guys have problems. I trust my wife with everything, she is my best friend, if there is no trust....time to take a walk!
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Amen to that!
Link Posted: 10/8/2001 7:42:43 AM EDT
I just took my fiance shoot for the first time this weekend. I would trust her with access to my gun safe, and know I have nothing to fear from her. Not a good relationship when you think the wife/girlfriend will kill you. Av.
Link Posted: 10/8/2001 7:45:37 AM EDT
Originally Posted By Scipio: our day is certainly coming...
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I think that I would think real hard about this if I were in your position.
Link Posted: 10/8/2001 7:47:52 AM EDT
Amen to that, Ice
Link Posted: 10/8/2001 7:48:29 AM EDT
Originally Posted By TheWind: You guys have problems. I trust my wife with everything, she is my best friend, if there is no trust....time to take a wolk!
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Exactly. If you can't trust your girlfriend/wife around your guns then you shouldn't be with her. Relationships are about trust, and if there isn't any then what is in your relationship? God Bless Texas
Link Posted: 10/8/2001 8:11:36 AM EDT
Wow, I have been married to my German for 21 years, she can shoot, I taught her early on. But if I felt I could not trust her, she would be gone. I have 2 daughter's that it is my job to protect. I also have a temper, I just control it, the wife has a temper, but she also controls it. That is part of the deal. SFC (ret)Rew E. Williams All glory to the Infantry!!
Link Posted: 10/8/2001 9:07:59 AM EDT
Originally Posted By Scipio: I don't fear her normally... but I might if she knew how to lock and load my ar or ak or any of my other pieces... Sometimes she flies off the handle at the dumbest little things... her parents spoiled her...
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Good thing she can't operate a baseball bat or kitchen knife.
Link Posted: 10/8/2001 9:16:49 AM EDT
My wife once told me (joking) that if I didn't stop bugging her about whatever it was we'd been argueing about, I'd wake up with one of my many knives sticking out of my chest. I asked her why she wouldn't just use a pistol or rifle... "So the neighbors won't hear." CREEPY!!! That was when I knew I really loved her. [B)] Seriously though, if you can't trust the person sleeping next to you with a gun, you should rethink your entire situation.
Link Posted: 10/8/2001 9:29:14 AM EDT
[Last Edit: 10/8/2001 9:25:09 AM EDT by Nuckles]
Dude, I would seriously think about the situation if I was you. I mean really think about it. I was married to a woman like this once, and all was well, but I knew it was coming [i]someday[/i], and it did. Marriage is alot different than a boyfriend/girlfriend situation. If I had had guns in those days, well, I wouldn't have any today. I'm glad thats all behind me. Just consider the possibilities; seriously. Nuckles. [smash] P.S. Let me guess, shes a Gemini? [:O]
Link Posted: 10/8/2001 9:51:27 AM EDT
After over 50 years of being married to the same irrational and, at times, insane person, I think I can offer some advice. (I'm glad the web proxy at her job doesn't work with this site!) Talk about what you're worried about with her. Make her promise not to shoot you. It sounds silly, but if she can get that mad and screwed-up, she might not be able to keep right from wrong or figure-out what is justifiable, but she should still be able to remember a promise. My uncle, who worked at the state mental hospital or "Bull Street" as we affectionatly call it, gave me that advice. It works.z
Link Posted: 10/8/2001 11:14:54 AM EDT
Nuckles... I don't buy into that zodiac stuff...but yes, she is in fact a gemini... so am I...
Link Posted: 10/8/2001 11:24:48 AM EDT
I'm not married yet, but I've been with my girlfriend for a few years now and our day is certainly coming... Anyway, I'm actually a bit hesitant to teach her how to use and operate my firearms... See, she has a really bad temper and I'm afraid she would try to use them on me someday, you know, while I'm sleeping... hehe
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[b]Teach her[/b] - she may need a gun to defend herself someday when you're not there. God forbid something would happen to her, and all you would have had to do to prevent it is teach her how to shoot. Anyway, if you're seriously concerned about her shooting you then maybe you should reconsider the whole thing! Either that or only give her a gun when you leave the house for awhile, then put it back in the safe when you return...if she lets you have it back!
Link Posted: 10/8/2001 12:50:44 PM EDT
My GF recently got a Turk Mauser for her birthday, and she keeps threatening (jokingly) to run me through with the bayonet if I dont sporterize it for her. Of course, she cant decide which stain she wants on the stock. Women, you cant live with them, but without them, who would help you load stripper clips until 3am? Kharn
Link Posted: 10/8/2001 1:05:21 PM EDT
My wife hates guns. Being from New York City you understand that no one up there has a use for them. None of her friends had guns. [>:/] That's why we compromised on ownership. I don't hunt, but I am a history buff, so I got a C&R license and joined the NRA. [argue]
Link Posted: 10/8/2001 1:17:35 PM EDT
I have taught my wife how to use my Glock 22. Now she feels safer when she is at home alone. I also want my wife friend to get a gun. This lady has two kid and she has been harassed by an X-boyfriend for a long time. She has court orders saying he can't come near her or her children but he still does(He works for the state so some how he's getting off with it.) I it was on Stp 29 this guy was banging and kicking her door trying to get in so she called the PD it took the 45mins to get there. At that time he was gone. They told her they would of been there sooner but they where at the beer feast making sure no one got out of hand(More like they wher wanting to get the money for the DUI's.I was there and saw no cops around.)But the funny thing was the place that this beer feast was at was only 2 blocks away from her house.
Link Posted: 10/8/2001 2:44:34 PM EDT
i may be way off base here, but i think you're leaving out a crucial point: her tendency to react violently. there is a big difference between bad temper and a tendency towards violence. the former just means one gets pissed. the latter means one act on that pissy attitude. i am mean tempered. i get mad easily, i get mad quickly, and i stay mad for a long time. but i have NEVER acted out on that anger. ever. unless you count punching the bed pillows a few times. matt has often said (half-jokingly) that he's worried about me carrying a gun because of my tendency to use it. which is a total crock because i've never (knock on wood) had to use my weapon for self-defense, nor have i ever brandished it to make a point. he think my quick temper equates to violent action too. and it's just not true. of course, he's not worried about me shooting him! sounds like you need to have a talk with her about your concerns. has she ever been violent before? like throwing things at you (or anyone else)? breaking out car windows? smashing walls or doors with fists or feet?
Link Posted: 10/8/2001 3:20:02 PM EDT
scarry dude, don't teach her!
Link Posted: 10/8/2001 3:24:00 PM EDT
ARLAdy... she has actually struck me a few times... nothing I couldn't handle (I'm 6'3" and about 240 lbs. she is about 5'3" and 110 lbs.), but still, enough to make me think twice about whether or not I wanted to be in a relationship with her... We've been on and off for about 8 years now, so its not a simple matter of just walking away. I love her, and would never lay a hand on her, but I'm just not sure I want to teach her how to use a gun... I've let her hold them, some of which she can barely hold up, like my M1A, but I haven't shown her how to load, charge, or shoot...
Link Posted: 10/8/2001 3:36:39 PM EDT
Link Posted: 10/8/2001 4:04:04 PM EDT
Dude, some advice from someone going through the big "D" If you are at least hesitant to teach her how to use guns then you should be worried. My soon to be ex has violent outbursts of temper that has gotten worse. Believe me take care of this "really bad temper" before making an important decision regarding marriage. It is much cheaper!
Link Posted: 10/8/2001 4:51:23 PM EDT
[Last Edit: 10/8/2001 4:47:48 PM EDT by GodBlessTexas]
Originally Posted By Scipio: ARLAdy... she has actually struck me a few times... nothing I couldn't handle (I'm 6'3" and about 240 lbs. she is about 5'3" and 110 lbs.), but still, enough to make me think twice about whether or not I wanted to be in a relationship with her... We've been on and off for about 8 years now, so its not a simple matter of just walking away.
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If she's struck you then it is just simply a matter of walking away. You may think you love her, but if you're afraid that she might be capable of shooting you then that is not love. You don't hit the people you love, unless they ask you nicely and are into that sort of thing. Seriously, that's how my brother started out abusing women, and it didn't stop until he died. I watched him punch his wife in the face and break her nose because she dropped a dish on Christmas day. This is the same women he said he "loved." God Bless Texas
Link Posted: 10/8/2001 5:49:56 PM EDT
[Last Edit: 10/8/2001 5:45:21 PM EDT by ARlady]
Originally Posted By GodBlessTexas:
Originally Posted By Scipio: ARLAdy... she has actually struck me a few times... nothing I couldn't handle (I'm 6'3" and about 240 lbs. she is about 5'3" and 110 lbs.), but still, enough to make me think twice about whether or not I wanted to be in a relationship with her... We've been on and off for about 8 years now, so its not a simple matter of just walking away.
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If she's struck you then it is just simply a matter of walking away. You may think you love her, but if you're afraid that she might be capable of shooting you then that is not love. You don't hit the people you love, unless they ask you nicely and are into that sort of thing. Seriously, that's how my brother started out abusing women, and it didn't stop until he died. I watched him punch his wife in the face and break her nose because she dropped a dish on Christmas day. This is the same women he said he "loved." God Bless Texas
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GBT is so right. i would never consider marrying a man who hit me. and the situation shouldn't be any different just because you're a man and bigger and stronger than she is. however, i also know how powerful love can be. is it possible that she could benefit from some (forgive the phrase, gentlemen, but i believe it applies here) anger management classes? people CAN change, but they have to want to. it may not be a lost cause, but you would definitely need to talk with her (and possibly someone else) about that. but back to the topic: having a bigger picture now, i wouldn't recommend teaching her how to shoot. in your situation (and i mean no offense here, please take it as a simple analogy of situation, and not an analogy of people), it would be like us giving bin Laden tactical weapons and the know-how to use them. we don't do that as a country. you prolly shouldn't be doing it as an individual. [;)] good luck, man. i hope things work out well. and she could probably stand a sharp smack on the arse the next time she hits you. if she's gonna act like a child.....
Link Posted: 10/8/2001 6:04:47 PM EDT
I don't worry about mine with a gun. But I did dissuade her from buying herself a taser. She would know a gun is final, but she might think a taser or cattle prod would be a good training aid. (Just kidding honey!!!)
Link Posted: 10/8/2001 6:23:23 PM EDT
Originally Posted By BigMac: Go ahead, teach her to shoot. Just dont give her the combo to the safe. [bounce]
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good advice
Link Posted: 10/8/2001 6:36:14 PM EDT
Originally Posted By cnatra:
Originally Posted By BigMac: Go ahead, teach her to shoot. Just dont give her the combo to the safe. [bounce]
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good advice
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i thought that too. but it only works if he keeps every single freakin' gun in the safe. which i doubt, given the propensity for most of us here to keep one "handy" for "emergencies." i think this is the root of the problem. she would need to know about this firearm for said emergencies (assuming she knew how to shoot, because what good is the knowledge without the application?) and i think he's afraid she'll use that firearm for violent purposes.
Link Posted: 10/8/2001 6:38:28 PM EDT
[Last Edit: 10/8/2001 6:35:10 PM EDT by btip]
You need a new girlfriend, drop her like a lead balloon. Remember that 90% of women out there from 18 - 35 today are not worth 2 cents, they are materialistic, inmature, uncommited, lazy, and refuse to grow up. You got to find one in that 10%. Written by a male chauvinist gun toting heterosexual Republican Christian. Ladies Flame on.
Link Posted: 10/8/2001 6:46:48 PM EDT
Here's a word of advice, friend to friend. If you think she gets angry NOW...just wait until you're married. Seriously. No matter how long you've been together, things change when you get married. All the "guards" are taken down. That usually means tolerances and limits. IN OTHER WORDS, she will have even less tolerance with you, and will REALLY go ape if she is prone to fits of rage. Not healthy. Not for her, and definitely not for you. As a bit of humor (with truth added in), here's something I heard once: It is a proven fact that married men live longer than single men--but they are much more willing to die!
Link Posted: 10/8/2001 7:07:03 PM EDT
Leaving her would doubless be the most difficult thing you have ever done. Marrying would be worse. Think for a moment about the possibilities. 1. She could use a gun against you. Even if you don't show her, it's not that difficult. She watches movies right? 2. She could press charges against you. A FAR more likely scenario. All the laws are stacked against you. You will lose your rights and become a criminal. Or go broke trying to defend your good name. 3. You could end up divorcing, see #1 and #2 Marrige does not solve any problems, it just makes the ones you already have more evident. People do NOT change long term. I learned this the hard way. It's a bitter fact of life that you cannot change another, and you cannot save someone from themselves. (unless you are Billy Graham) Good luck. "My first wife was crazy, hell, they all are, you just find the level you can live with" (an old unnamed guru)
Link Posted: 10/8/2001 7:18:56 PM EDT
Originally Posted By BillofRights: Marrige does not solve any problems, it just makes the ones you already have more evident.
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If you have a great relatioship, you may have a REALLY great one. If you you have a poor relationship, you will have a REALLY poor one. Sorry, but if you are afraid she will shoot you, trust your fear.
Link Posted: 10/8/2001 7:34:13 PM EDT
[Last Edit: 10/8/2001 7:32:17 PM EDT by BigMac]
Originally Posted By Scipio: ARLAdy... she has actually struck me a few times... nothing I couldn't handle (I'm 6'3" and about 240 lbs. me too she is about 5'3" and 110 lbs. same here, shes a runt... ), but still, enough to make me think twice about whether or not I wanted to be in a relationship with her... not me We've been on and off for about 8 years now, so its not a simple matter of just walking away. I love her, and would never lay a hand on her, but I'm just not sure I want to teach her how to use a gun... I've let her hold them, some of which she can barely hold up, like my M1A, but I haven't shown her how to load, charge, or shoot...
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hell at my house my wife punchin me is kinda like foreplay. Shes gota get my attention ya know.. I taught my wife to shoot. I wouldn't have it any other way. I trust her with my life. If I didn't think I could we would not be together. This is the only time in your life you will get to chose relitives. Chose wisely. edited cause even i could find typos
Link Posted: 10/8/2001 8:01:34 PM EDT
I don't want to bad mouth your girlfriend, but this just sounds really bad. I agree with those who have said that you should bail out now while you can. The fact is that she has hit you before, and if you ever so much as restrain her after she hits you, she will probably call the cops, and YOU will be the one who goes to jail for domestic abuse. After all, only men hit women, and if she hit you, she was only defending herself right? [rolleyes] How many cops would believe you anyway? I would think seriously about all this. ARlady made some good points as did others. FWIW, my advise is to run and save yourself before you get trapped with kid and the prospect of losing half of your possessions. Good luck.
Link Posted: 10/8/2001 9:22:09 PM EDT
I have not been married as long as some on this board, but I do know that my husband and I have happened onto a unique relationship that few find. I say this only because of the reactions I get from those who are around us. What I have learned in our time together is that #1 everything should be shared equally. This includes love and trust. I do not expect my husband to call 'his' guns 'our' guns, or feel like he should have to relinquish half of his material belongings to me just because we are married. I do expect that if he expects me to love him unconditionaly (which I do) then I expect the same out of him. If I am to trust him with a 12 guage and a pistol by the bed, then he needs to be able to trust that i will not use them against him. If you can not trust her with a gun against you then you might want to rethink your situation. Marriage accentuates everthing, good and bad. If she has a bad temper now that worries you and makes you not trust her - then immagine how it will be after you become more comfortable together. If you can not trust her to share in your hobbies do you want to trust her to share in your life? [stick] Azaria
Link Posted: 10/8/2001 10:34:20 PM EDT
When I first got married my wife was curious about my guns. She learned how to shoot and got her carry permit. She lost interest in shooting and I ended up with a couple nice guns that she bought. My wife no longer has access to the guns. It's not because I don't trust her, but because she hasn't shot them in years and would need a refresher safety course. She kind of forgot about her guns until some houses in the neighborhood were broken into. About 5 or 6 years ago she shot in a Ladies Classic handgun event. I couldn't believe she hit 38 out of 40 targets. She hadn't fired a gun for at least 10 years when she did that. If you live in a state that requires some type of permit or licence to own a firearm your wife should also have a licence or permit. Where I live if I were to die and my wife didn't have a permit, by law she would have 2 days to dispose of my guns. I don't know of any widows who were arrested but this is how the law is written.
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