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10/20/2017 1:01:18 AM
9/22/2017 12:11:25 AM
Posted: 8/23/2005 8:34:26 AM EDT
SEXUAL CALORIE COUNTER


It has been known for many years that sex is a good exercise, but until recently nobody had made a scientific study of the caloric expenditure of different sexual activities. Now after original and proprietary research, they are proud to present the results.


REMOVING HER CLOTHES:
With her consent .......... 12 Calories
Without her consent .......... 187 Calories

OPENING HER BRA:
With both hands .......... 8 Calories
With one hand .......... 12 Calories
With your teeth .......... 85 Calories

PUTTING ON A CONDOM:
With an erection .......... 6 Calories
Without an erection .......... 315 Calories

FOREPLAY:
Trying to find the clitoris .......... 8 Calories
Trying to find the G-spot .......... 92 Calories

POSITIONS:
Missionary .......... 12 Calories
69 lying down .......... 78 Calories
69 standing up ........... 112 Calories
Wheelbarrow .......... 216 Calories
Doggy style .......... 326 Calories
Italian chandelier .......... 912 Calories

ORGASM:
Real .......... 112 Calories
False .......... 315 Calories

POST ORGASM:
Lying in bed hugging .......... 18 Calories
Getting up immediately .......... 36 Calories
Explaining why you got out of bed immediately .......... 816 Calories

GETTING A SECOND ERECTION: If you are
20 - 29 years old .......... 36 Calories
30 - 39 years old .......... 80 Calories
40 - 49 years old .......... 124 Calories
50 - 59 years old .......... 972 Calories
60 - 69 years old .......... 2916 Calories
70 and over .......... results are still pending

DRESSING UP AFTERWARDS:
Calmly .......... 32 Calories
In a hurry .......... 98 Calories
With her father knocking at the door .......... 1218 Calories
With your wife knocking at the door .......... 3521 Calories



Hope it's not a dupe.
Link Posted: 8/23/2005 8:35:50 AM EDT
But how many calories does she gain by swallowing?
Link Posted: 8/23/2005 8:38:12 AM EDT
What's an Italian chandelier?
Link Posted: 8/23/2005 8:39:59 AM EDT

Originally Posted By 2A373:
What's an Italian chandelier?

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