Rate the Coarseness of Your Workplace Bathroom's Toilet Paper...

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[ARCHIVED THREAD] - Rate the Coarseness of Your Workplace Bathroom's Toilet Paper...

Posted: 10/8/2007 8:39:33 AM EDT

Using the Sandpaper Grit Chart below as your guide, select the Poll option that best describes the texture of the toilet paper your company provides for its staff.

It seems like almost every place I have worked has had the worst ass-tearing, 'roid-ripping, 30-grit-sandpaper-on-a-roll you've ever seen or felt.

How about where you work?

ETA: Last poll selection should end with word Jewelry (guess there's a line limit I went over).

Posted: 10/8/2007 8:40:56 AM EDT

[#1]

single ply 30 grit TP. Unless I really have to shit, I avoid it like the plague. Also sucks when you have a runny nose.

Posted: 10/8/2007 8:42:24 AM EDT

[#2]

We have John Wayne brand paper here...

Posted: 10/8/2007 8:42:55 AM EDT

[#3]

I very, very rarely shit at work.

Posted: 10/8/2007 8:44:31 AM EDT

[#4]

soft as clouds

asst manager handles purchasing of the TP

he went cheap on me once

I placed 6 cases of TP (unboxed) into his vehicle

never a problem since

Posted: 10/8/2007 8:44:36 AM EDT

[#5]

Actually, our TP at work isn't too bad.. it's a little on the thin side... so you have to make an eagle's nest out of it if you're goint to do any serious wiping..

Posted: 10/8/2007 8:46:44 AM EDT

[#6]

I just shit on the floor, then drag my ass in circles on the floor like a dog..no need for TP

Posted: 10/8/2007 8:47:28 AM EDT

[#7]

The toilet paper is good stuff.

The toilet on the other hand, it doesn't take shit from nobody. At least two flushes and you better hold the fuckin' handle to get maximum water flow or you'll be in there for a good 3 to 4 flushes.

Posted: 10/8/2007 8:48:04 AM EDT

[#8]

Posted: 10/8/2007 8:48:56 AM EDT

[#9]

Quoted:
I very, very rarely shit at work.

Bein' paid to poop is one of life's great pleasures.

Posted: 10/8/2007 8:49:04 AM EDT

[#10]

Somewhere between tree bark and gravel road. I avoid it if at all possible.

Posted: 10/8/2007 8:49:59 AM EDT

[#11]

Think cheese grater

Posted: 10/8/2007 8:50:40 AM EDT

[#12]

We have Charmin at work, but its a small business.

Posted: 10/8/2007 8:51:15 AM EDT

[#13]

If you hold up a sheet of the TP at the office you can see through it.

Good news is homecoming is this week so we should get some decent shit paper from all the kids that get caught.

Posted: 10/8/2007 8:52:01 AM EDT

[#14]

Quoted:

Quoted:
I very, very rarely shit at work.

Bein' paid to poop is one of life's great pleasures.

I'll have to take your word for it. Every minute I'm not working is a minute that I have to make up at night or on the weekends.

Posted: 10/8/2007 8:52:24 AM EDT

[#15]

I've got the good stuff.

Posted: 10/8/2007 8:52:34 AM EDT

[#16]

Quoted:

Quoted:
I very, very rarely shit at work.

Bein' paid to poop is one of life great pleasures.

Seriously. Take your favorite gun mag in with you and enjoy some reading time. No one EVER doubts that I was in there taking care of business. You have to be a brave person to walk in there after I come out.

I am decent enough to warn people.

Posted: 10/8/2007 8:53:39 AM EDT

[#17]

We have nice soft stuff, but they keep it locked up.

Posted: 10/8/2007 8:54:32 AM EDT

[#18]

60 grit sandpaper

Posted: 10/8/2007 8:55:04 AM EDT

[#19]

Sandpaper rough & thin. I am the buyer. Increases employee productivity if they aren't sitting on the john at work.

As I am posting on ARFKOM during work hours.

Posted: 10/8/2007 8:57:11 AM EDT

[#20]

Quoted:
Sandpaper rough & thin. I am the buyer. Increases employee productivity if they aren't sitting on the john at work.

As I am posting on ARFKOM during work hours.

I knew it!

Posted: 10/8/2007 8:58:56 AM EDT

[#21]

I keep a roll of Charmin in my desk for emergencies.
We've got the same crap the airports have, its so thin you could read a newspaper through it.

Kharn

Posted: 10/8/2007 9:01:01 AM EDT

[#22]

We have John Wayne toilet paper at my work.

Rough and tough and don't take no shit off of nobody.

Posted: 10/8/2007 9:03:02 AM EDT

[#23]

Quoted:
We have John Wayne toilet paper at my work.

Rough and tough and don't take no shit off of nobody.

thus explaining your screen name

Posted: 10/8/2007 9:04:41 AM EDT

[#24]

Quoted:

Quoted:
We have John Wayne toilet paper at my work.

Rough and tough and don't take no shit off of nobody.

thus explaining your screen name

Posted: 10/8/2007 9:06:37 AM EDT

[#25]

This is uttered by me on a daily basis:

"OW, FUCK!!! ARE YOU FUCKING KIDDING ME?!?! AM I BLEEDING? FUCK I THINK I SLICED A VAIN!!!! IS THAT...IS THAT A WOOD CHIP? THERE'S FUCKING WOOD CHIPS IN THE T.P.!!! OOOOWWWWWWWWWWW!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!"

Posted: 10/8/2007 9:07:36 AM EDT

[#26]

Practically bleeds every time.

Posted: 10/8/2007 9:08:59 AM EDT

[#27]

Quoted:
I very, very rarely shit at work.

I shit as much as I can at the office. That way, I don't have the urge to drop some wolf bait when I'm sitting on a boat with no shitter 8 miles offshore.

I learned the first time I had to hold it for an hour. I swear my eyes turned brown.

Posted: 10/8/2007 9:09:46 AM EDT

[#28]

the same as the brown paper towels to dry your hands except it is white

Posted: 10/8/2007 9:12:12 AM EDT

[#29]

The TP at work is actually pretty decent. The toilet is amazing, though. You can lay a huge turd across the bowl, basking like a walrus, and then toilet paper on top of that, and it'll snap the turd in two, and suck all that down to the sewers. It's amazing.

Posted: 10/8/2007 9:12:40 AM EDT

[#30]

Quoted:

Quoted:
I very, very rarely shit at work.

Bein' paid to poop is one of life's great pleasures.

I'll have to take your word for it. Every minute I'm not working is a minute that I have to make up at night or on the weekends.

I've been told this:

"Never sweat on company time, never shit on your own time"

With that said the asswipe where I work is like 36 grit

Posted: 10/8/2007 9:15:45 AM EDT

[#31]

Is your washroom breeding Bolsheviks?

Employees lose respect for a company that fails to provide decent facilities for their comfort.

Try wiping six days a week on harsh, cheap paper towels or awkward, unsanitary roller towels __ and maybe you, too, would grumble.

Towel service is just one of those mall, but important courtesies -- such as proper air and lighting -- that help build up the good will of your employees.

That's why you'll find clothlike Scot-Tissue Towels in the washrooms of large well-run organizations such as R.C.A. Victor Co., Inc., National Lead Co. and Campbell Soup Co.

ScotTissue Towels are made of "thirsty fibre"...an amazing cellulose product that drinks up moisture 12 time as fast as ordinary paper towels. They feel soft and pliant as a linen towel. Yet they're so strong and tough in texture they won't crumble or go to pieces. . . even when they are wet.

And they cost less, too -- because one is enough to dry the hands -- instead of three or four.

Write for free trial coupon. Scot Paper Company, Chester, Pennsylvania.

ScotTissue Towels - really dry.

Posted: 10/8/2007 9:20:02 AM EDT

[#32]

I buy the work TP. It is like wiping your assholio with silk.

Posted: 10/8/2007 9:41:14 AM EDT

[#33]

TP magnified 500x:

The long, thin fibers you see here are really elongated cells of the pine tree. The trees are cut down, chipped up and pounded to separate the fibers from the rest of the tree material.

Posted: 10/8/2007 11:40:49 AM EDT

[#34]

The spectrum of cheap toilet paper starts at sandpaper but the other end of the spectrum is like wax paper.

Posted: 10/8/2007 12:33:10 PM EDT

[#35]

Quoted:

Quoted:
I very, very rarely shit at work.

Bein' paid to poop is one of life's great pleasures.

Fuckin' A. Get in there at a quiet time of the day with a newspaper, and you can really relax...

Posted: 10/8/2007 12:34:45 PM EDT

[#36]

Quoted:
Using the Sandpaper Grit Chart below as your guide, select the Poll option that best describes the texture of the toilet paper your company provides for its staff.

i240.photobucket.com/albums/ff134/justth1nk/Sandpapergritchart.jpg

It seems like almost every place I have worked has had the worst ass-tearing, 'roid-ripping, 30-grit-sandpaper-on-a-roll you've ever seen or felt.

How about where you work?

ETA: Last poll selection should end with word Jewelry (guess there's a line limit I went over).

I'd rate it if I could find some...

Go Army... Go buy some TP!

Posted: 10/8/2007 12:36:27 PM EDT

[#37]

Yet another advantage of working from home.

Posted: 10/8/2007 12:38:08 PM EDT

[#38]

The last place I worked at had TP that was so thin that it was practically unusable.

Posted: 10/8/2007 8:45:25 PM EDT

[#39]

We have those huge ass industrial rolls and one day it fell off and rolled out of the shitter I was in and I could still pull it loose from the roll. The only thing it's missing is POLICE LINE DO NOT CROSS.