Warning

 

Close

Confirm Action

Are you sure you wish to do this?

Confirm Cancel
Member Login

Site Notices
1/22/2020 12:12:56 PM
Arrow Left Previous Page
Page / 2
Posted: 9/18/2009 11:30:19 PM EST
I really like this chick I've been hanging out with for a while, and I asked her out a while back and she said she just views me as a friend. I really like hanging out with her and she still likes to hang out with me but sometimes it just really gets me down cause I'm not with her. For a while now I have been debating bout whether or not to hang out with her and was wondering how often any of you end up going with a guy you viewed as just a friend?
Link Posted: 9/18/2009 11:31:36 PM EST

Originally Posted By ak47man91:
I really like this chick I've been hanging out with for a while, and I asked her out a while back and she said she just views me as a friend. I really like hanging out with her and she still likes to hang out with me but sometimes it just really gets me down cause I'm not with her. For a while now I have been debating bout whether or not to hang out with her and was wondering how often any of you end up going with a guy you viewed as just a friend?


Link Posted: 9/18/2009 11:32:29 PM EST
Originally Posted By ak47man91:
I really like this chick I've been hanging out with for a while, and I asked her out a while back and she said she just views me as a friend. I really like hanging out with her and she still likes to hang out with me but sometimes it just really gets me down cause I'm not with her. For a while now I have been debating bout whether or not to hang out with her and was wondering how often any of you end up going with a guy you viewed as just a friend?


Guy here.

Seriously, move on. Drop her from your life. It will be nothing but grief for you, and shit will never change. Don't put yourself through that. Sever ties.
Link Posted: 9/18/2009 11:32:42 PM EST
Originally Posted By ak47man91:
I really like this chick I've been hanging out with for a while, and I asked her out a while back and she said she just views me as a friend. I really like hanging out with her and she still likes to hang out with me but sometimes it just really gets me down cause I'm not with her. For a while now I have been debating bout whether or not to hang out with her and was wondering how often any of you end up going with a guy you viewed as just a friend?


Cut your losses and move on. You are being used as an emotional tampon in an entirely selfish way.
Link Posted: 9/18/2009 11:32:56 PM EST
As a guy all I can do is quote Pearl Jam: It's no crime to escape.
Be prepared for the words "eject" "bail out" and really cool pictures of pilots punching out of their jets.
Link Posted: 9/18/2009 11:33:42 PM EST
Abort.

not worth it.... of all the women friends I've had, I think maybe only 1 has EVER had the capacity to be an actual friend.
Link Posted: 9/18/2009 11:34:49 PM EST
[Last Edit: 9/18/2009 11:37:56 PM EST by AnnaTrocity]
You should probably just move on. You're "friend zoned" for a reason. Usually it's complete lack of physical attraction and it's pretty unlikely that you're going to wind up getting her to change her mind.

Edit: Personal experience, when I've broken the friend zone it's been because there was always potential there but mitigating factors kept us platonic.

Other times I've broken the friend zone have been because we were both intoxicated and horny . If you've got a crush on her it's going nowhere good even if she has sex with you one night.
Link Posted: 9/18/2009 11:36:52 PM EST
Chick here.

It *could* change, but it isn't horribly likely.

That being said, if you actually like her, keep her as a friend. Then, when you find the next girl you want to date, one of two things will happen.

1. Current chick will be able to suitably advise you on your path to success with new chick (that's what friends do).

2. Current chick will develop green-eyed-monster syndrome, and decide you are date-worthy after all.

I suppose the 3rd option, and, unfortunately, maybe most likely, is current chick will develop GEMS, remain in denial, and give you shitty advice, being all catty and all.
Link Posted: 9/18/2009 11:37:48 PM EST
Yeah she really is a good friend but I want more and I doubt that will ever happen I do just need to drop her. thanks think I just needed to hear someone else say it.
Link Posted: 9/18/2009 11:37:49 PM EST
Originally Posted By CanadianDave:

Originally Posted By ak47man91:
I really like this chick I've been hanging out with for a while, and I asked her out a while back and she said she just views me as a friend. I really like hanging out with her and she still likes to hang out with me but sometimes it just really gets me down cause I'm not with her. For a while now I have been debating bout whether or not to hang out with her and was wondering how often any of you end up going with a guy you viewed as just a friend?




can't believe this. but dave might be right.
Link Posted: 9/18/2009 11:42:19 PM EST
[Last Edit: 9/18/2009 11:49:06 PM EST by fefu23]
Originally Posted By Lancair:
Originally Posted By ak47man91:
I really like this chick I've been hanging out with for a while, and I asked her out a while back and she said she just views me as a friend. I really like hanging out with her and she still likes to hang out with me but sometimes it just really gets me down cause I'm not with her. For a while now I have been debating bout whether or not to hang out with her and was wondering how often any of you end up going with a guy you viewed as just a friend?


Cut your losses and move on. You are being used as an emotional tampon in an entirely selfish way.


this

my ex is trying pull this shit

chilled with her once and noticed, thats exactly what she was doing. now i just pretty much ignore her

not getting anything from her current bf, so he comes to me like i wanna hear the shit, i could barely stand it when i was with her





Link Posted: 9/18/2009 11:43:09 PM EST
Originally Posted By ak47man91:
I really like this chick I've been hanging out with for a while, and I asked her out a while back and she said she just views me as a friend. I really like hanging out with her and she still likes to hang out with me but sometimes it just really gets me down cause I'm not with her. For a while now I have been debating bout whether or not to hang out with her and was wondering how often any of you end up going with a guy you viewed as just a friend?



Move on. If you must persist, try treating her like shit you'd be surprised how some girls (to immature to be woman) respond to that. Don't be the friend or the emotional tampon. The only women it is your job to listen to is the woman you are committed to or those in your immediate family.

Link Posted: 9/18/2009 11:44:12 PM EST


Off topic but to me this picture just looks like it advocates jerking off.

Guess it can be appropriate to thread in either context.
Link Posted: 9/18/2009 11:45:11 PM EST
Originally Posted By meep:
Chick here.

It *could* change, but it isn't horribly likely.

That being said, if you actually like her, keep her as a friend. Then, when you find the next girl you want to date, one of two things will happen.

1. Current chick will be able to suitably advise you on your path to success with new chick (that's what friends do).

2. Current chick will develop green-eyed-monster syndrome, and decide you are date-worthy after all.

I suppose the 3rd option, and, unfortunately, maybe most likely, is current chick will develop GEMS, remain in denial, and give you shitty advice, being all catty and all.


Option #4 Threesome!
Link Posted: 9/18/2009 11:46:37 PM EST
Originally Posted By AnnaTrocity:


Off topic but to me this picture just looks like it advocates jerking off.

Guess it can be appropriate to thread in either context.






Would this one be a bit more clear for you ?


Link Posted: 9/18/2009 11:47:00 PM EST
She's not using me to let her emotions out thats for sure. It sucks cause I haven't met many chicks like her she's not slutty, shes smart, attractive and responsible. I thought they stopped making them like this lol. I need to find a good place to meet a decent woman that will make me a sandwich on command lol.
Link Posted: 9/18/2009 11:49:42 PM EST
[Last Edit: 9/18/2009 11:50:05 PM EST by AnnaTrocity]
Originally Posted By the-fly:
Originally Posted By AnnaTrocity:


Off topic but to me this picture just looks like it advocates jerking off.

Guess it can be appropriate to thread in either context.






Would this one be a bit more clear for you ?


http://www.btfh.net/posting/bail-out.jpg




Thanks, I don't even like guns, I just come here to collect eject pictures and I Haven;t seen that one yet.
Link Posted: 9/18/2009 11:49:44 PM EST
[Last Edit: 9/18/2009 11:53:12 PM EST by wutzu]


In the time it would take you to break through the friend zone(assuming you even could), you could go get yourself several other, better girls. ETA: Like her friends

EDIT

She's not using me to let her emotions out thats for sure. It sucks cause I haven't met many chicks like her she's not slutty, shes smart, attractive and responsible. I thought they stopped making them like this lol. I need to find a good place to meet a decent woman that will make me a sandwich on command lol.


Aww... She's perfect for you and she just doesn't realize it? You should tell her. Try to hook up with her friends. If she really wants to be your friend, she'll put in a good word.
Link Posted: 9/18/2009 11:50:42 PM EST
Originally Posted By ak47man91:
I really like this chick I've been hanging out with for a while, and I asked her out a while back and she said she just views me as a friend. I really like hanging out with her and she still likes to hang out with me but sometimes it just really gets me down cause I'm not with her. For a while now I have been debating bout whether or not to hang out with her and was wondering how often any of you end up going with a guy you viewed as just a friend?


A good relationship always starts out as friends...Just hang in there...Maybe she will come around...Trust me this works....

I started out with the hubby as just friends. Thought he was cool to hang with and then I saw him talking to another girl and that is when I knew...He hung in there (I had just gotten out of a really shitty relationship and didn't want to get into another) but then when I saw him talking to other girls––that was it for me...11 years later––married with a kid...

Us women are some strange beings––-hang in there––especially if you really really like her...
Link Posted: 9/18/2009 11:53:06 PM EST
lol this is thread 999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999­9999999999 about another guy being stuck in the friend zone


maybe 2 or 3 of those people actually end up moving up to more than a friend

and the other bazillion think they are going to beat the odds and be one of those 2 or 3, because they feel so strongly about this woman





good luck dude.


like most other people have said so far, try to find another one.
Link Posted: 9/18/2009 11:56:56 PM EST
Don't believe any of these people!

You still have a chance, you just have to be patient, and not give up hope, but most important, keep your eye on the prize, no matter how far you stray from your goal. I had this same exact thing happen and ended up working out for me.

First, you have to create space between the two of you, not so much you lose contact, but enough maybe only a E-mail now and again. Possibly chat on Facebook or Myspace.

Most importantly, GET A GIRLFRIEND! If you stay all sad sack and mopey, holding out for her you won't get ANYWHERE. You flat out won't be attractive, since your NOT attracting Females. Doesn't have to be serious, just some flings to bide the time. Hell I dated a girl for 3 years, moved her down to Fla for a bit, sure took the girl out of my mind I was waiting for, then that old relationship killer of money came up, and that relationship dissolved.

BUT fortunately, the stars had aligned, the girl who I had always hoped to be with, and had kept up with through sporadic messaging happened to be getting out of a relationship also! Well we talked every night on the phone for awhile (I was out of state) and next thing you know, I told her we should get together, bing bang boom I book a flight to Wa and my dream came true!



2 1/2 months later we broke up, that chick was nuttier than a squirrel turd.

So the way my buddy handles situations like that, is after finding a girl that doesn't want to get with him, but he HAS to be with her; He'll sleep with her least attractive friend, then make a name for himself, working his way up building the gossip about how great he is until finally the gal he's after folds and gets with him.

This is also how he ended up with the nickname "garbage dick" but it worked!

So good luck!
Link Posted: 9/18/2009 11:58:57 PM EST
Originally Posted By Madcap72:
Don't believe any of these people!

You still have a chance, you just have to be patient, and not give up hope, but most important, keep your eye on the prize, no matter how far you stray from your goal. I had this same exact thing happen and ended up working out for me.

First, you have to create space between the two of you, not so much you lose contact, but enough maybe only a E-mail now and again. Possibly chat on Facebook or Myspace.

Most importantly, GET A GIRLFRIEND! If you stay all sad sack and mopey, holding out for her you won't get ANYWHERE. You flat out won't be attractive, since your NOT attracting Females. Doesn't have to be serious, just some flings to bide the time. Hell I dated a girl for 3 years, moved her down to Fla for a bit, sure took the girl out of my mind I was waiting for, then that old relationship killer of money came up, and that relationship dissolved.

BUT fortunately, the stars had aligned, the girl who I had always hoped to be with, and had kept up with through sporadic messaging happened to be getting out of a relationship also! Well we talked every night on the phone for awhile (I was out of state) and next thing you know, I told her we should get together, bing bang boom I book a flight to Wa and my dream came true!



2 1/2 months later we broke up, that chick was nuttier than a squirrel turd.

So the way my buddy handles situations like that, is after finding a girl that doesn't want to get with him, but he HAS to be with her; He'll sleep with her least attractive friend, then make a name for himself, working his way up building the gossip about how great he is until finally the gal he's after folds and gets with him.

This is also how he ended up with the nickname "garbage dick" but it worked!

So good luck!


+1...See??? Someone on here agrees with me....It works!!!
Link Posted: 9/19/2009 12:03:09 AM EST
Ugh. This poor guy. You can ask folks here how to take a bandaid off and you'll get everything from "do it quick" to "really slow and enjoy the pain." Where the hell are all the kickass eject pictures? must be the day crew that has those
Link Posted: 9/19/2009 12:03:47 AM EST

Originally Posted By AnnaTrocity:
You should probably just move on. You're "friend zoned" for a reason. Usually it's complete lack of physical attraction and it's pretty unlikely that you're going to wind up getting her to change her mind.

Edit: Personal experience, when I've broken the friend zone it's been because there was always potential there but mitigating factors kept us platonic.

Other times I've broken the friend zone have been because we were both intoxicated and horny. If you've got a crush on her it's going nowhere good even if she has sex with you one night.

OP is currently driving to the liquor store.
Link Posted: 9/19/2009 12:05:07 AM EST
Thanks guys think Im gonna just stop talking to her and try to move on I got enough chick friends lol. Maybe when I get a new phone I will get a new number too.
Link Posted: 9/19/2009 12:07:49 AM EST
Originally Posted By ak47man91:
Thanks guys think Im gonna just stop talking to her and try to move on I got enough chick friends lol. Maybe when I get a new phone I will get a new number too.


Well if you don't really really like her––then yeah move on...But if you like her it is worth it to stay and see what happens...
Link Posted: 9/19/2009 12:08:46 AM EST
[Last Edit: 9/19/2009 12:16:08 AM EST by sherrick13]
You are an intellectual whore.

check out the ladder theory

http://www.laddertheory.com/
Link Posted: 9/19/2009 12:15:10 AM EST
[Last Edit: 9/19/2009 12:16:39 AM EST by Madcap72]
Originally Posted By sherrick13:
You are a cuddle whore.

check out the ladder theory

http://www.laddertheory.com/


So true.

edit- about the link, not the OP being a cuddle whore.

Link Posted: 9/19/2009 12:15:27 AM EST
I do like her it's just that when I'm around her I'm not looking at other women i'm only focusing on her and I just feel like I'm wasting time. I think that if she changes her mind she would come to me
Link Posted: 9/19/2009 12:19:29 AM EST
Originally Posted By ak47man91:
I do like her it's just that when I'm around her I'm not looking at other women i'm only focusing on her and I just feel like I'm wasting time. I think that if she changes her mind she would come to me


You are 100% correct on ALL of that.

You are being distracted by her, you are wasting time, and if she does EVER change her mind, she may just as well come calling. So, basically, get your balls out of her purse, your NOT in a relationship, you CAN go after other girls and bide your time.


And for GODS SAKE read that "ladders" web page!!!

If I'd have read that before I got started in the dating world I'd have been better off!
Link Posted: 9/19/2009 12:21:47 AM EST
Like I said, the fastest way to get with her is to spend time with other women. As soon as she realizes that she doesn't have that power over you anymore, it's fair game.
Link Posted: 9/19/2009 12:24:07 AM EST
Originally Posted By AnnaTrocity:


Off topic but to me this picture just looks like it advocates jerking off.

Guess it can be appropriate to thread in either context.


Anna is right. You need to think about her, rub one out, rinse and repeat a few times. Then you will begin to realize that is the most its goanna be. If you really want to spice it up tell her about it.
Link Posted: 9/19/2009 12:24:28 AM EST

For what it's worth, and some here will disagree, no harm in being a friend and interested.

The rub comes when you put the blinders on and can't see what else is available to you. When you start ignoring what have for what if. Most people can't handle this, and I think why it's usually the common advice to just run away.

Not to slam you OP, but, it sounds like you should take the commonly held advice. I had to at one point, too.
Link Posted: 9/19/2009 12:24:34 AM EST
Yeah I will read that later today going to bed think last 2 posts are the advice I'm going with thanks a lot guys, have a good one.
Link Posted: 9/19/2009 12:26:18 AM EST
Stand outside her house during the night and wait for her to look out the window. Then flash her your wang. Chicks dig that kind of persistance.
Link Posted: 9/19/2009 12:29:30 AM EST
Originally Posted By Room101:
Stand outside her house during the night and wait for her to look out the window. Then flash her your wang. Chicks dig that kind of persistance.


Ahh, the "trolling" technique. I don't know if our OP is wise enough in the ways of the world to pull that one off yet.
Link Posted: 9/19/2009 12:33:07 AM EST
Originally Posted By ak47man91:
Yeah I will read that later today going to bed think last 2 posts are the advice I'm going with thanks a lot guys, have a good one.


Don't forget to wash your hands.

Link Posted: 9/19/2009 1:57:30 AM EST
BTDT bail dude. I like the analogy from earlier, you like ripping the bandaid off or peeling it off slow? Just bail. Don't let this chick treat you like her girlfriend any longer, because I can tell by your post that she is. You want to waste your life being a chicks bitch? Absolutely disregard the advice of those telling you to stick it out, you have a better chance of winning the lotto.
Link Posted: 9/19/2009 2:00:19 AM EST
she views you as a friend because there is no hope for you, ever

trust me when a chick mentions being "just friends" you don't have a chance you aren't hot/cool/rich enough to date them
Link Posted: 9/19/2009 2:07:03 AM EST
Originally Posted By ak47man91:
I got enough chick friends lol.


Why do you have so many "chick friends"?

I think your problem goes quite a bit deeper then this one girl if you have a lot of "chick friends".
Link Posted: 9/19/2009 2:09:18 AM EST
[Last Edit: 9/19/2009 2:14:46 AM EST by ehunter30]
Originally Posted By meep:
Chick here.

It *could* change, but it isn't horribly likely.

That being said, if you actually like her, keep her as a friend. Then, when you find the next girl you want to date, one of two things will happen.

1. Current chick will be able to suitably advise you on your path to success with new chick (that's what friends do).

2. Current chick will develop green-eyed-monster syndrome, and decide you are date-worthy after all.

I suppose the 3rd option, and, unfortunately, maybe most likely, is current chick will develop GEMS, remain in denial, and give you shitty advice, being all catty and all.


4th possibility.....future threesome damn nevermind been said already thats what i get for getting stuck on the redheads post


in that case..you have recieved the kiss of death ..lets be friends
Link Posted: 9/19/2009 2:41:17 AM EST
Originally Posted By AnnaTrocity:


Off topic but to me this picture just looks like it advocates jerking off.

Guess it can be appropriate to thread in either context.


Well sometimes the night isn't generous to all of us
Link Posted: 9/19/2009 2:54:22 AM EST
Originally Posted By CanadianDave:

Originally Posted By ak47man91:
I really like this chick I've been hanging out with for a while, and I asked her out a while back and she said she just views me as a friend. I really like hanging out with her and she still likes to hang out with me but sometimes it just really gets me down cause I'm not with her. For a while now I have been debating bout whether or not to hang out with her and was wondering how often any of you end up going with a guy you viewed as just a friend?




Yep, you lost right there.


Link Posted: 9/19/2009 2:59:13 AM EST
If she truly is a good friend she will set you up with some of her friends. As soon as she finds a cock she wants, you'll be a distant memory.
Link Posted: 9/19/2009 3:02:48 AM EST
Ditch her but have some fun doing it. The next time you are with her start complaining about this girl that just keeps leading you on and when she starts calling the girl a bitch and saying you deserve more stand up and tell her "It's you, you fuking basket case"
Link Posted: 9/19/2009 3:18:16 AM EST
Roofies dude, roofies







No, seriously, you need to start tapering off the "friendship" you are never going to get what you want, and she is going to use you for as long as she can.
Link Posted: 9/19/2009 3:26:39 AM EST

Originally Posted By Currahee:
Roofies dude, roofies

No, seriously, you need to start tapering off the "friendship" you are never going to get what you want, and she is going to use you for as long as she can.

That's a really cynical attitude. What's wrong with having a friend?
Link Posted: 9/19/2009 3:32:50 AM EST
Originally Posted By max229:

Originally Posted By Currahee:
Roofies dude, roofies

No, seriously, you need to start tapering off the "friendship" you are never going to get what you want, and she is going to use you for as long as she can.

That's a really cynical attitude. What's wrong with having a friend?


When one friend is more emotionally attached than the other generally the one with less emotional attachment is in a position of power and the one with the more attachment is letting life pass them by in hopes that the other will change. If both are on a friendship level then that is fine but that isn't what we have here.
Link Posted: 9/19/2009 3:33:13 AM EST
[Last Edit: 9/19/2009 3:33:34 AM EST by psyops4fun]
Originally Posted By conservativeblkfem:
Originally Posted By ak47man91:
I really like this chick I've been hanging out with for a while, and I asked her out a while back and she said she just views me as a friend. I really like hanging out with her and she still likes to hang out with me but sometimes it just really gets me down cause I'm not with her. For a while now I have been debating bout whether or not to hang out with her and was wondering how often any of you end up going with a guy you viewed as just a friend?


A good relationship always starts out as friends...Just hang in there...Maybe she will come around...Trust me this works....

I started out with the hubby as just friends. Thought he was cool to hang with and then I saw him talking to another girl and that is when I knew...He hung in there (I had just gotten out of a really shitty relationship and didn't want to get into another) but then when I saw him talking to other girls––that was it for me...11 years later––married with a kid...

Us women are some strange beings––-hang in there––especially if you really really like her...




TRUTH here.

Link Posted: 9/19/2009 3:36:47 AM EST

Originally Posted By conservativeblkfem:
Originally Posted By ak47man91:
I really like this chick I've been hanging out with for a while, and I asked her out a while back and she said she just views me as a friend. I really like hanging out with her and she still likes to hang out with me but sometimes it just really gets me down cause I'm not with her. For a while now I have been debating bout whether or not to hang out with her and was wondering how often any of you end up going with a guy you viewed as just a friend?


A good relationship always starts out as friends...Just hang in there...Maybe she will come around...Trust me this works....

I started out with the hubby as just friends. Thought he was cool to hang with and then I saw him talking to another girl and that is when I knew...He hung in there (I had just gotten out of a really shitty relationship and didn't want to get into another) but then when I saw him talking to other girls––that was it for me...11 years later––married with a kid...

Us women are some strange beings––-hang in there––especially if you really really like her...

This is sound advice. I have seen this scenario played out countless times. Really troll looking guys ending up marrying beautiful, on the ball women because they were persistent. As mentioned by cbf above, she needs to see that other women are interested in you, and that may well close the deal. Not a guaranty by any stretch, but slow and steady does usually win the race.

Women generally don't know what they want...but they DO know they want what other women want. If you want to go full Machiavellian, I'd even PAY some decent looking girls to come up and start flirting with you the next time you are out with this girl. There are no rules in love and war!

I should add, though, that a relationship not built on Christ will be a rough ride. I learned this the hard way.
Link Posted: 9/19/2009 3:38:51 AM EST
[Last Edit: 9/19/2009 3:46:11 AM EST by VooDoo3dfx]
Originally Posted By ak47man91:
I really like this chick I've been hanging out with for a while, and I asked her out a while back and she said she just views me as a friend. I really like hanging out with her and she still likes to hang out with me but sometimes it just really gets me down cause I'm not with her. For a while now I have been debating bout whether or not to hang out with her and was wondering how often any of you end up going with a guy you viewed as just a friend?


BTDT

Move on.

Unless you like the drama.

Because if you do, ARFCOM sure likes seeing train wrecks.
Arrow Left Previous Page
Page / 2
Top Top