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4/18/2021 9:59:29 PM
Posted: 6/4/2008 10:37:49 AM EDT

Subject: Noah's ark in 2008

In the year 2008, the Lord came unto Noah, who was now living in the
United States, and said, 'Once again, the earth has become wicked and
over-populated, and I see the end of all flesh before me.

Build another Ark and save 2 of every living thing along with a few good
humans.'

He gave Noah the blueprints, saying, 'You have 6 months to build the Ark
before I will start the unending rain for 40 days a nd 40 nights.'

Six months later, the Lord looked down and saw Noah weeping in his yard -
but no Ark.
'Noah!' He roared, 'I'm about to start the rain! Where is the Ark?'

'Forgive me, Lord,' begged Noah, 'but things have changed. I needed a
 building permit. I've been arguing with the inspector about the need for
a sprinkler system.

My neighbors claim that I've violated the neighborhood zoning laws by
building the Ark in my yard and exceeding the height limitations. We had
to go to the Development Appeal Board for a decision.

Then the Department of Transportation demanded a bond be posted for the
future costs of moving power lines and other overhead obstructions, to
clear the passage for the Ark's move to the sea. I told them that the
sea
would be coming to us, but they would hear nothing of it.

Getting the wood was another problem. There's a ban on cutting local
trees in order to save the spotted owl. I tried to convince the
environmentalists that I needed the wood to save the owls - but no go!

When I started gathering the animals, an animal rights group sued me.
They insisted that I was confining wild animals against their will. They
argued the accommodations were too restrictive, and it was cruel and
inhumane to put so many animals in a confined space.

Then the EPA ruled that I couldn't build the Ark until they'd conducted
an environmental impact study on your proposed flood.

I'm still trying to resolve a complaint with the Human Rights Commission
on how many minorities I'm supposed to hire for my building crew.
Immigration and Naturalization are checking the green-card status of most
of the people who want to work. The trades unions say I can't use my
sons. They insist I have to hire only Union workers with Ark-building
experience.

To make matters worse, the IRS seized all my assets, claiming I'm trying
to leave the country illegally with endangered species.

So, forgive me, Lord, but it would take at least 10 years for me to
finish
this Ark.'

Suddenly the skies cleared, the sun began to shine, and a rainbow
stretched across the sky. Noah looked up in wonder and asked, 'You mean
you're not going to destroy the world?'

'No,' said the Lord. 'The government beat me to it.'
Link Posted: 6/4/2008 10:38:53 AM EDT
Was funny the first time I read it and it said "In the year 2001..." too.
Link Posted: 6/4/2008 10:41:06 AM EDT

Quoted:
Was funny the first time I read it and it said "In the year 2001The year 8 BO (Before Obama)..." too.


wow what was the earth like back then OLD MAN...................us youngen's don't know
Link Posted: 6/4/2008 10:50:18 AM EDT

Quoted:

Quoted:
Was funny the first time I read it and it said "In the year 2001The year 8 BO (Before Obama)..." too.


wow what was the earth like back then OLD MAN...................us youngen's don't know


Walked to school in the snow, uphill both ways!! And we had 56k Modems!
Link Posted: 6/4/2008 10:53:07 AM EDT

56k Modems!


why so many modems 55,999 modems not enough
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