Need Your Twisted Ideas Here!!!!!!!!!

[ARCHIVED THREAD] - Need Your Twisted Ideas Here!!!!!!!!!

Posted: 5/13/2004 5:11:28 AM EDT

i have before me a return envelope and a long letter from john kerry telling me how bad a shape the US is in, that he has a "plan" to fix it and for me to send him some money to get that evil bush out of office

my current idea is to mail him a penny and a post it note politely telling him to take it and shove it

but i knoooooooooooow arfcom can come up with something better so help me out here

Posted: 5/13/2004 5:12:58 AM EDT

[#1]

Sounds like some photoshopping is in order.

Posted: 5/13/2004 5:13:36 AM EDT

[#2]

First, post the letter....!

Posted: 5/13/2004 5:15:44 AM EDT

[#3]

If its postage paid, then something heavy - like an old laptop battery.

Posted: 5/13/2004 5:17:48 AM EDT

[#4]

~~suspicious white powder~~
~~tape reply card to brick~~
~~empty envelope~~

Fill envelope with shredded paper. Throw your penny in with that. Make sure the note is the same size as the penny.

Put note+penny in a smaller envelope, and wrap it thoroughly with picture wire, then put "wired" envelope inside Kerry's. (Scissors won't easily cut picture wire.)

Wait a minute...get both. Small "wired" envelope packed along with shredded paper.

Posted: 5/13/2004 5:19:02 AM EDT

[#5]

Get replica medals at a surplus store or a gun show.

Send them to him and tell him that now he wants to be in charge of the military, he might want his back.

Posted: 5/13/2004 5:19:56 AM EDT

[#6]

Posted: 5/13/2004 5:24:49 AM EDT

[#7]

no damnit, unfortunately enough postage is not prepaid so i have to spend 37 cents in order to make an ass out of myself but well worth the price i think

letter is two pages of bullshit, i might type it up later today

Posted: 5/13/2004 5:26:42 AM EDT

[#8]

Mail the entire packet to Castro.

ktm500

Posted: 5/13/2004 5:28:37 AM EDT

[#9]

Quoted:
letter is two pages of bullshit, i might type it up later today

scan it...

Posted: 5/13/2004 5:29:35 AM EDT

[#10]

Put the NRA's latest plea for money in the Kerry envelope and send it back!

Posted: 5/13/2004 5:30:33 AM EDT

[#11]

Send in a body fluid sample of your choice.

Sgtar15

Posted: 5/13/2004 5:33:05 AM EDT

[#12]

Quoted:
Get replica medals at a surplus store or a gun show.
Send them to him and tell him that now he wants to be in charge of the military, he might want his back.

And affix them to an emtpy bottle of Heinz CATSUP. Where the ingredient label is, stick a picture of him and Hanoi Jane... Fill the bottle with piss and three letters: A-R-T (children's magnetic types would work). Put a band-aid on it for good measure.

Posted: 5/13/2004 5:37:15 AM EDT

[#13]

Send a note telling him you spent your last $20 on a blow job from Teresa.....then send in the body fluid.

Sgtar15

Posted: 5/13/2004 7:34:32 AM EDT

[#14]

come on arfcom, that can't be all ya got!!!!

Posted: 5/13/2004 8:00:47 AM EDT

[#15]

here is what you need
1-cardboard box
1-lantern battery
1-pound of clay
lots of different wires
1-Nitro pill(for people with bad hearts)
1-roll of duck tape
1 electronic looking gadget

Note: secure all things that go into package

Step one- take the clay and put it in the box

Step two- put battery in box

Step three-line the inside of the box with wires. Also connect the clay to the battery.

Step four- conect the electronic gadget to the battery or clay

Step five- crush up the nitro pill and sprinkle it all over the package.

Step six- tape box closed. Make sure to get some nitro on the back side of the tape.

Last step- Mail of to the address and sit back and watch to see if it makes it on the news

Posted: 5/13/2004 10:22:06 AM EDT

[#16]

Send a 10 lb stack of the Iraqi GWB Dinars from registered.com using their post paid envelope on the box.

Posted: 5/13/2004 10:23:21 AM EDT

[#17]

Quoted:
If its postage paid, then something heavy - like an old laptop battery.

i was thinking a car battery, but ok.

Posted: 5/13/2004 10:25:31 AM EDT

[#18]

Quoted:
Put the NRA's latest plea for money in the Kerry envelope and send it back!

I like that one!

Posted: 5/13/2004 10:27:00 AM EDT

[#19]

Just take every anti-kerry photoshop you can find, print them, and include them in the envelop with your $.01 donation.

Posted: 5/13/2004 10:31:39 AM EDT

[#20]

Don't send him a penny.

SEND HIM A PESO!

Posted: 5/13/2004 10:33:12 AM EDT

[#21]

No, send him a penny. As I understand it (and I could be wrong) every legal tender donation has to be recorded, and it takes several dollars worth of time/aggravation/postage to record a $.01 donation.

Posted: 5/13/2004 10:41:42 AM EDT

[#22]

Quoted:
Get replica medals at a surplus store or a gun show.

Send them to him and tell him that now he wants to be in charge of the military, he might want his back.

AWSOME!!!!

Posted: 5/13/2004 10:43:21 AM EDT

[#23]

Make it 2 pennies . With all of the photoshop shit . DO NOT SEND ANY OF THIS FAKE BOMB SHIT OR WHITE POWDERS . YOU WILL be FUBAR.

Posted: 5/13/2004 10:57:09 AM EDT

[#24]

send him random porn pics of fat women

or gay porn would probably work too.

Posted: 5/13/2004 11:02:14 AM EDT

[#25]

Send him a penny and a pic.

Posted: 5/13/2004 11:05:27 AM EDT

[#26]

Wipe your ass witha stack of Canadian 5 dollar bills seal them in a zip lock bag and mail it to him.

[ARCHIVED THREAD] - Need Your Twisted Ideas Here!!!!!!!!!

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