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Posted: 9/30/2011 5:01:23 PM EDT
Our assignment tonight is to write multiple poems about the same object from different points of view.
I decided to write poems about my Sig 556  I hope he likes my poems, now I just have to do about 5 more  The first one: Sig Sauer 556 Classic Piston driven folding stock magazine fed 5.56 NATO 1 in 7'' twist 35.85'' overall, 16'' hammer-forged barrel, 8.2lbs, gas-operated rotating bolt MSRP $1191.00 Not legal in California or Massachusetts |
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Posted: 9/30/2011 5:03:05 PM EDT
[#1]
Limericks count, right?
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Posted: 9/30/2011 5:03:21 PM EDT
[#2]
There once was a man from Nantucket. |
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Posted: 9/30/2011 5:03:28 PM EDT
[#3]
what?
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Posted: 9/30/2011 5:03:39 PM EDT
[#4]
Naaah, write Vogon Poetry instead (Google it if you don't know what it is.)
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Posted: 9/30/2011 5:04:00 PM EDT
[#5]
There once was a man from Nantucket...
Oh, wait, no, you had probably better not use that one. ETA: Beat again. 
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Posted: 9/30/2011 5:04:38 PM EDT
[#6]
I'm sure I was forced to write a sonnet in college.
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Posted: 9/30/2011 5:05:02 PM EDT
[#7]
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Posted: 9/30/2011 5:06:21 PM EDT
[#8]
Quoted:
There once was a man from Nantucket. Bart Simpson: "oh yeah, what about him?" Homer Simpson: "Lets just say the stories about him were GREATLY exaggerated." |
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Posted: 9/30/2011 5:06:35 PM EDT
[#9]
No sig sauer
Makes many a man dour caliber of five point five six makes haji vacate the area most rikki tik while a piston may make go the bolt Op should have bought a fucking Colt |
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Posted: 9/30/2011 5:06:53 PM EDT
[#10]
If he's really a liberal douche bag forego the gun poetry or you might wind up on a campus "WATCH LIST". You know how crazy those gun nuts are, right?
 This is a moment for a more stealthy approach to passing the class.
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Posted: 9/30/2011 5:07:18 PM EDT
[#11]
The teacher annoys me Giving me assignments like this Maybe today I should introduce him Meet mister SIG 556 Hes a nasty mofo With a bad attitude So is my teacher Who masquerades as a dude |
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Posted: 9/30/2011 5:07:22 PM EDT
[#12]
Quoted:
I'm sure I was forced to write a sonnet in college. Was it "The Guns of Will Sonnet"? damn, I'm old... |
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Posted: 9/30/2011 5:07:24 PM EDT
[#13]
Quoted: No sig sauer Makes many a man dour caliber of five point five six makes haji vacate the area most rikki tik while a piston may make go the bolt Op should have bought a fucking Colt Very nice |
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Posted: 9/30/2011 5:08:14 PM EDT
[#14]
Quoted:
Quoted:
No sig sauer Makes many a man dour caliber of five point five six makes haji vacate the area most rikki tik while a piston may make go the bolt Op should have bought a fucking Colt Very nice Dibs on half the grade for that one
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Posted: 9/30/2011 5:08:16 PM EDT
[#15]
I want to buy a Sig
I want to wave the flag My English teacher's big A friggin big douche bag |
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Posted: 9/30/2011 5:09:51 PM EDT
[#16]
Dark and cloudy on a summer night,
Kill my land lord kill my land lord See the doggie, Do he bite? Kill my land lord kill my land lord. Climb through window Break his neck Then his house I start to wreck C-I-L-L my LANLORD |
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Posted: 9/30/2011 5:10:07 PM EDT
[#17]
I think you all are missing the point of the assignment
he likes faggy shit like this.For example, I wrote my second one like I was describing it from an "artistic" standpoint Sig Sauer should hire me as a marketing director  Smooth deep lines contrasted by sharp angles Form and Function come together as one Cold heat-treated steel and smooth polymer Working in conjunction to form A fatal piece of art |
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Posted: 9/30/2011 5:11:04 PM EDT
[#18]
The Creed of a US Marine
This is my rifle. There are many like it, but this one is mine. My rifle is my best friend. It is my life. I must master it as I must master my life. My rifle, without me, is useless. Without my rifle, I am useless. I must fire my rifle true. I must shoot straighter than my enemy who is trying to kill me. I must shoot him before he shoots me. I WILL... My rifle and myself know that what counts in this war is not the rounds we fire, the noise of our burst, nor the smoke we make. We know that it is the hits that count. WE WILL HIT... My rifle is human, even as I, because it is my life. Thus, I will learn it as a brother. I will learn its weaknesses, its strength, its parts, its accessories, its sights and its barrel. I will ever guard it against the ravages of weather and damage as I will ever guard my legs, my arms, my eyes and my heart against damage. I will keep my rifle clean and ready. We will become part of each other. WE WILL... Before God, I swear this creed. My rifle and myself are the defenders of my country. We are the masters of our enemy. WE ARE THE SAVIORS OF MY LIFE. So be it, until victory is America's and there is no enemy, but peace! |
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Posted: 9/30/2011 5:11:07 PM EDT
[#19]
Quoted: I'm sure I was forced to write a sonnet in college. A single sonnet? We had to write dozens of those things in High School. I had no idea what to write them about, so I asked my friends who were into WoW to give me ideas. I made sonnets about Level 60 Warlocks and Elves or some shit like that so I could weird out my English teacher. Many LOLs were had from that. |
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Posted: 9/30/2011 5:11:53 PM EDT
[#20]
Quoted: Quoted: I'm sure I was forced to write a sonnet in college. Was it "The Guns of Will Sonnet"? damn, I'm old... Before my time Pappy |
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Posted: 9/30/2011 5:12:31 PM EDT
[#21]
Quoted: Quoted: I'm sure I was forced to write a sonnet in college. A single sonnet? We had to write dozens of those things in High School. I had no idea what to write them about, so I asked my friends who were into WoW to give me ideas. I made sonnets about Level 60 Warlocks or some shit like that so I could weird out my English teacher. Many LOLs were had from that. We didn't have wow to write about |
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Posted: 9/30/2011 5:12:46 PM EDT
[#22]
Sig weapons are great.
They feel like part of my hand. Let's go to the range. |
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Posted: 9/30/2011 5:13:14 PM EDT
[#23]
Quoted: A good casimir pulaski poem would freak him out. Our assignment tonight is to write multiple poems about the same object from different points of view. I decided to write poems about my Sig 556 I hope he likes my poems, now I just have to do about 5 more The first one: Sig Sauer 556 Classic Piston driven folding stock magazine fed 5.56 NATO 1 in 7'' twist 35.85'' overall, 16'' hammer-forged barrel, 8.2lbs, gas-operated rotating bolt MSRP $1191.00 Not legal in California or Massachusetts |
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Posted: 9/30/2011 5:14:42 PM EDT
[#24]
you could always go the e.e. cummings route
men in blue happy sigs on their shoulders puppy wags his tail pop-pop pop-pop happy men in blue |
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Posted: 9/30/2011 5:14:53 PM EDT
[#25]
What's the class?
I was forced to write a paper about "an out of class interview" for a class. I wrote 4 pages about a cardiac arrest patient and how I interviewed his distraught family while the patient vomited all over me and how I placed an I/O needle. I hope they have nightmares. I didn't have space to fit in the story about the guy who's head exploded the night before the paper was due...I didn't want to rewrite the whole thing. |
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Posted: 9/30/2011 5:15:19 PM EDT
[#26]
Or, how about this?
When I am in a sober mood, I like to worry, work and think. When I am in a drunken mood, I like to gamble, screw and drink. But when my moods are over, and my time has come to pass, I hope they bury me upside down so the whole world can KISS MY ASS! |
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Posted: 9/30/2011 5:16:21 PM EDT
[#27]
Quoted:
No sig sauer Makes many a man dour caliber of five point five six makes haji vacate the area most rikki tik while a piston may make go the bolt Op should have bought a fucking Colt  
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Posted: 9/30/2011 5:17:09 PM EDT
[#28]
Quoted:
I think you all are missing the point of the assignment he likes faggy shit like this.For example, I wrote my second one like I was describing it from an "artistic" standpoint Sig Sauer should hire me as a marketing director Smooth deep lines contrasted by sharp angles Form and Function come together as one Cold heat-treated steel and smooth polymer Working in conjunction to form A fatal piece of art Excellent Sir , may I add that last line to my sig line, with due credit of course As a side note a member here wrote a HELL of a poem about the function of an AR, he is heading to my house right now I'll see if he can post it |
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Posted: 9/30/2011 5:17:21 PM EDT
[#29]
Quoted: you could always go the e.e. cummings route men in blue happy sigs on their shoulders puppy wags his tail pop-pop pop-pop happy men in blue
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Posted: 9/30/2011 5:17:44 PM EDT
[#30]
Roses are red.
Violets are blue. 0bama is a fucking dirty communist. AND SO ARE YOU. Tell her you expect and "A" .
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Posted: 9/30/2011 5:17:55 PM EDT
[#31]
Quoted: What's the class? I was forced to write a paper about "an out of class interview" for a class. I wrote 4 pages about a cardiac arrest patient and how I interviewed his distraught family while the patient vomited all over me and how I placed an I/O needle. I hope they have nightmares. I didn't have space to fit in the story about the guy who's head exploded the night before the paper was due...I didn't want to rewrite the whole thing. Intro to Creative Writing. Its required for my major, secondary english education
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Posted: 9/30/2011 5:18:08 PM EDT
[#32]
Quoted:
What's the class? I was forced to write a paper about "an out of class interview" for a class. I wrote 4 pages about a cardiac arrest patient and how I interviewed his distraught family while the patient vomited all over me and how I placed an I/O needle. I hope they have nightmares. I didn't have space to fit in the story about the guy who's head exploded the night before the paper was due...I didn't want to rewrite the whole thing. the glistening sharp beveled steel tubes of life bored into his marrow... 
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Posted: 9/30/2011 5:18:31 PM EDT
[#33]
Try this...
MY PROFESSOR IS AN ASSHOLE by Casimir Pulaski. My professor is an asshole, yep, that is really what I said. He gives us class assignments, that make me wish that he was dead. I write him poems about my guns, because I enjoy them by the tons. And then my course grade starts to suffer, all cuz he's a mother fucker. Wait...no, don't use that either. Bad idea.
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Posted: 9/30/2011 5:18:43 PM EDT
[#34]
Quoted:
Roses are red. Violets are blue. 0bama is a fucking dirty communist. AND SO ARE YOU. Tell her you expect and "A" .
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Posted: 9/30/2011 5:19:56 PM EDT
[#35]
Quoted: Quoted: I think you all are missing the point of the assignment he likes faggy shit like this.For example, I wrote my second one like I was describing it from an "artistic" standpoint Sig Sauer should hire me as a marketing director Smooth deep lines contrasted by sharp angles Form and Function come together as one Cold heat-treated steel and smooth polymer Working in conjunction to form A fatal piece of art Excellent Sir , may I add that last line to my sig line, with due credit of course As a side note a member here wrote a HELL of a poem about the function of an AR, he is heading to my house right now I'll see if he can post it Go for it |
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Posted: 9/30/2011 5:21:22 PM EDT
[#36]
Quoted:
Roses are red. Violets are blue. 0bama is a fucking dirty communist. AND SO ARE YOU. Tell her you expect and "A" .
I'm going to post that above my desk. |
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Posted: 9/30/2011 5:23:14 PM EDT
[#37]
I didn't realize we had so many Billy Shakespeare's in GD
keep em coming they are making this more bareable
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Posted: 9/30/2011 5:24:14 PM EDT
[#38]
Quoted: Our assignment tonight is to write multiple poems about the same object from different points of view. I decided to write poems about my Sig 556 I hope he likes my poems, now I just have to do about 5 more The first one: Sig Sauer 556 Classic Piston driven folding stock magazine fed 5.56 NATO 1 in 7'' twist 35.85'' overall, 16'' hammer-forged barrel, 8.2lbs, gas-operated rotating bolt MSRP $1191.00 Not legal in California or Massachusetts Liberal douchebag Lament, SIG five point five six GPA hostage m |
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Posted: 9/30/2011 5:25:55 PM EDT
[#39]
SIG
5.56 by 45 millimeters Arm of Freedom kills commies kills socialists kills terrorists kills my enemy kills your enemy kills enemies that just need to be killed choose wisely kill with SIG |
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Posted: 9/30/2011 5:26:37 PM EDT
[#40]
I tried to write one from a lib-tard view
A tool for killing, anger embodied hanging on the wall An evil black rifle for evil black-hearted men Archaic solutions to modern problems Ban weapons of hate, for the children's sake |
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Posted: 9/30/2011 5:27:16 PM EDT
[#41]
Is he asking for Haikus, or traditional western rhyming verse?
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Posted: 9/30/2011 5:28:16 PM EDT
[#42]
Quoted: In before the campus lock down. I tried to write one from a lib-tard view A tool for killing, anger embodied hanging on the wall An evil black rifle for evil black-hearted men Archaic solutions to modern problems Ban weapons of hate, for the children's sake |
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Posted: 9/30/2011 5:29:53 PM EDT
[#43]
Sorry, but I think you may have signed up for this one....
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Posted: 9/30/2011 5:30:17 PM EDT
[#44]
Quoted: Is he asking for Haikus, or traditional western rhyming verse? Neither, he's all about no-rules poetry crap I just try to copy his style so he gives me a good grade
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Posted: 9/30/2011 5:31:18 PM EDT
[#45]
I have a gun
You have not I want an A What have you got? |
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Posted: 9/30/2011 5:31:35 PM EDT
[#46]
I actually wrote a very nice poem about guns for a creative writing class, and my VERY liberal professor gave me top marks and had me recite it for the class.
Most Lit/English/Writing profs recognize good writing even if it's not on a topic they like. |
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Posted: 9/30/2011 5:32:43 PM EDT
[#47]
This old sig
It is fun It goes bang bang Love my gun With a knick knack Paddywack Give a dog a bone This 556 has found a home |
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Posted: 9/30/2011 5:33:18 PM EDT
[#48]
Here's a Sig Sauer
Model five five and six The round's underpowered I'd rather fight with a stick.
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Posted: 9/30/2011 5:33:30 PM EDT
[#49]
Quoted: I actually wrote a very nice poem about guns for a creative writing class, and my VERY liberal professor gave me top marks and had me recite it for the class. Most Lit/English/Writing profs recognize good writing even if it's not on a topic they like. I got a 100% last week in my tech writing class for my essay on a "step by step process we are intimately familiar with" I wrote 800 words on how an AK functions Feedback said "80/80. Horrifying. Great writing Casimir_Pulaski"
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Posted: 9/30/2011 5:34:03 PM EDT
[#50]
Quoted: Here's a Sig Sauer Model five five and six The round's underpowered I'd rather fight with a stick.  |
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