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Posted: 7/10/2008 8:47:12 AM EST
While Capt. James T. Kirk is pretty fabulous and got to sleep with all the alien babes (and probably Spock), Picard's ensigns didn't die every five minutes, and he was borg and came back, and his voice is downright sexy... You decide, who would you want to fly into space with.
Link Posted: 7/10/2008 8:48:28 AM EST
Q
Link Posted: 7/10/2008 8:52:22 AM EST
Link Posted: 7/10/2008 8:52:26 AM EST
picard was the shit man.
Link Posted: 7/10/2008 8:53:30 AM EST
Which one had kids on his fucking ship?

'nuff said.


Kirk would have 'spaced' the little bastards.

Picard let them sit in his fucking chair.
Link Posted: 7/10/2008 8:53:34 AM EST
Picard is a much better speaker than Kirk. I get tingles up my leg when I hear him speak. He's all about that "hope" and "change" that this galaxy needs.
Link Posted: 7/10/2008 8:53:51 AM EST
[Last Edit: 7/10/2008 8:54:43 AM EST by Infallible]
Kirk wins hands down for not being French alone.
Anyone who votes Picard has a latent homosexual desire for bald old men wearing leotards.



Link Posted: 7/10/2008 8:53:55 AM EST
Obvious answer is Kirk, but Picard was a more traditional Captain.
Link Posted: 7/10/2008 8:55:10 AM EST

Originally Posted By HardShell:
Archer

+1
Link Posted: 7/10/2008 8:55:14 AM EST
How many ladies did Picard bed during TNG? Yeah, I thought so.

Plus there's the whole issue of Cabin Boy Wesley...

Kharn
Link Posted: 7/10/2008 8:55:41 AM EST
I vote Picard myself... that voice... so HOT!!

but this is magical


Link Posted: 7/10/2008 8:55:41 AM EST
100. Kirk is a leader, not a follower.
99. Kirk never really got into that kinky "Jumpsuit" look.
98. Kirk has sex more than once a season.
97. One Word: Hair.
96. Another Word: Pretty-good-looking-can't-see-the-weave-WIG.
95. Kirk can beat up a Klingon bare-handed.
94. Picard is a French man with an English accent.
93. Kirk would date Beverly Crusher -- and damn the consequences!!
92. Kirk never drinks tea. Ever.
91. Diplomacy for Kirk is a phaser and a smirk.
90. Kirk would personally throw Wesley off his bridge.
89. Two words: Shoulder Roll.
88. Kirk doesn't wear dresses when admirals arrive for lunch.
87. Kirk once said: "I've got a belly-ache -- and it's a beauty."
86. Kirk would never sing to children in a crisis.
85. Kirk can almost drive a stick shift.
84. Kirk, almost single-handedly, re-populated the Earth's whale
population.
83. Kirk says "Prime Directive? What Prime Directive?"
82. Kirk knows 20th Century curses.
81. Kirk was NEVER infiltrated by the Borg and used against the
Federation.
80. Kirk ate little coloured cubes and still remained relatively healthy.
79. Kirk made do with obviously low performance technology.
78. Kirk never pretends to be a barber in order to gain a tactical
advantage.
77. Kirk wasn't shy about taking his shirt off
--even around those pesky Yeomans.
76. Kirk would never waste a holodeck on something stupid like Dixon Hill.
75. Kirk never once stood up and had to straighten his shirt.
74. One Word: Velour.
73. Kirk can beat a Vulcan at Chess.
72. When Kirk was Picard's age, he retired from Admiral and took to
climbing rocks.
71. When Picard was 37, he was only Captain of the lowly freighter,
Stargazer. When Kirk was 37, he was Captain of the flagship
Enterprise.
70. Kirk liked a good belt of liquor every now and again.
69. One Word: Iman.
68. Kirk looks good with a ripped shirt.
67. If Kirk ever met a Ferengi, he would rip off its head and shit down
its neck.
66. Kirk says "Shoot first and wait for retaliation."
65. Kirk's first officer NEVER tells him to stay on the bridge.
64. Kirk never leaves the room to bawl somebody out.
63. Kirk doesn't rely on the wisdom of some dumb old
janitor to get him out of intergalactic scrapes.
62. Two Words: Funky Sideburns.
61. Kirk never asks his bartender for advice.
60. Kirk never once said "Abandon ship! All hands abandon ship!"
59. Kirk is not politically correct.
58. Kirk never got "dumped" by a woman for an intergalactic busy body named
after a letter of the alphabet.
57. Kirk never wore green tights and frolicked about in Sherwood Forest.
56. If there was ever a Klingon on Kirk's bridge, Kirk would likely be
dead.
55. Ever hear of a bar shooter called "Make it so?" No? How about a
"Beam me up Scotty" then? See the difference?
54. One Word: Miniskirts.
53. Kirk's girlfriends always look good in soft light.
52. Kirk never went anywhere without a whole bunch of guys in red
shirts.
51. Kirk's first officer didn't play some wimpy instrument like the
trombone.
50. Kirk had more dates than his first officer.
49. The extent of Kirk's knowledge of Klingon vocabulary can be roughly
translated as "GO F*CK YOURSELF."
48. If something doesn't speak English -- it's toast.
47. Kirk wasn't some prissy archaeology fan.
46. Picard's middle name isn't tough or awe-inspiring like Tiberius is.
45. If Kirk finds a strange spinning probe, he blows it up.
44. Picard never met Joan Collins.
43. Picard flunked his entrance exams to Starfleet.
42 Picard hasn't fathered any children; Kirk -- probably millions.
41. Kirk has a cool phaser -- not some pansy Braun mix-master.
40. Two Words: Line Delivery.
39. Picard grew up on a quaint little French vineyard, squishing grapes
with his toes, while Kirk slung bails of wheat and hay
in Iowa to put himself through school.
38. Kirk emphasizes his orations with pertinent hand gestures.
37. Kirk once made a cannon out of bamboo, sulphur, potassium nitrate,
charcoal and then fired diamonds into the hearts of his
enemies. (Need we say more?)
36. Kirk is not put off by green skin.
35. Kirk knows how to deal with peace loving hippy goofs.
34. Kirk once fought a Greek god. And won.
33. Kirk barely asks for suggestions. And if he does, he asks Spock only.
32. Kirk doesn't let the doctor tell him what to do.
31. One Word: Fisticuffs.
30. Kirk's name is hated throughout the galaxy.
29. Kirk appreciates Shakespeare, but he doesn't let it show.
28. You can never lock up Kirk for very long.
27. Kirk's eulogies can actually make you cry.
26. Kirk plays god with lesser cultures, and then exploits them for
resources.
25. Kirk's son would never drop out to become a musician.
24. Kirk can climb up a Jeffries Tube and fix anything.
23. Kirk never hired an engineer with punk glasses.
22. The Klingons didn't have a word for surrender -- until they met Kirk.
21. Kirk's bridge is not beige.
20.Two Words: Crane Shots.
19. Picard likes wimpy violin music -- and coerces Data into playing it.
18. Picard allows cats on board, while Kirk beams away even really cute
things, like Tribbles.
17. Kirk is a cultural icon -- Picard is just some guy who's really nice.
16. Kirk specifically ordered a swivel LA-Z-BOY for the bridge.
15. Kirk would never touch SYNTHAHOL.
14. Kirk looks distinguished in reading glasses -- and nobody dares to
call him"four eyes."
13. Kirk can infiltrate Gangsters, Nazis, and even the Pentagon -- easily.
12. Picard likes painting nudes, for art's sake.
11. When Kirk doesn't trust the Romulans, he fires at them. When Picard
doesn't trust the Romulans, he gets fired at.
10. Kirk never once, ever,wore a wiener wrapping Speedo banana hammock on
shore leave.
9. Kirk never gets his command codes locked out by some pimply acting
ensign.
8. Kirk doesn't test the engines -- he just fires them up.
7. When Kirk says "Boldly Go," he MEANS it.
6. Three Words: Flying Leg Kick
5. Picard's crew would never ever think of him as a sexual object.
4. Kirk traveled through The Great Barrier, met God, and wasn't even
impressed.
3. Kirk's bedroom is a passion pit with electric sheets.
2. Kirk would never let his Chief of Security wear a ponytail.
1. One Word: Balls.
Link Posted: 7/10/2008 8:55:49 AM EST
Kirk.

Picard was French. It's a wonder he ever ordered phaser fire.
Link Posted: 7/10/2008 8:57:56 AM EST
Cpt. Kangaroo
Link Posted: 7/10/2008 9:02:36 AM EST

Originally Posted By Infallible:
100. Kirk is a leader, not a follower.
99. Kirk never really got into that kinky "Jumpsuit" look.
98. Kirk has sex more than once a season.
97. One Word: Hair.
96. Another Word: Pretty-good-looking-can't-see-the-weave-WIG.
95. Kirk can beat up a Klingon bare-handed.
94. Picard is a French man with an English accent.
93. Kirk would date Beverly Crusher -- and damn the consequences!!
92. Kirk never drinks tea. Ever.
91. Diplomacy for Kirk is a phaser and a smirk.
90. Kirk would personally throw Wesley off his bridge.
89. Two words: Shoulder Roll.
88. Kirk doesn't wear dresses when admirals arrive for lunch.
87. Kirk once said: "I've got a belly-ache -- and it's a beauty."
86. Kirk would never sing to children in a crisis.
85. Kirk can almost drive a stick shift.
84. Kirk, almost single-handedly, re-populated the Earth's whale
population.
83. Kirk says "Prime Directive? What Prime Directive?"
82. Kirk knows 20th Century curses.
81. Kirk was NEVER infiltrated by the Borg and used against the
Federation.
80. Kirk ate little coloured cubes and still remained relatively healthy.
79. Kirk made do with obviously low performance technology.
78. Kirk never pretends to be a barber in order to gain a tactical
advantage.
77. Kirk wasn't shy about taking his shirt off
--even around those pesky Yeomans.
76. Kirk would never waste a holodeck on something stupid like Dixon Hill.
75. Kirk never once stood up and had to straighten his shirt.
74. One Word: Velour.
73. Kirk can beat a Vulcan at Chess.
72. When Kirk was Picard's age, he retired from Admiral and took to
climbing rocks.
71. When Picard was 37, he was only Captain of the lowly freighter,
Stargazer. When Kirk was 37, he was Captain of the flagship
Enterprise.
70. Kirk liked a good belt of liquor every now and again.
69. One Word: Iman.
68. Kirk looks good with a ripped shirt.
67. If Kirk ever met a Ferengi, he would rip off its head and shit down
its neck.
66. Kirk says "Shoot first and wait for retaliation."
65. Kirk's first officer NEVER tells him to stay on the bridge.
64. Kirk never leaves the room to bawl somebody out.
63. Kirk doesn't rely on the wisdom of some dumb old
janitor to get him out of intergalactic scrapes.
62. Two Words: Funky Sideburns.
61. Kirk never asks his bartender for advice.
60. Kirk never once said "Abandon ship! All hands abandon ship!"
59. Kirk is not politically correct.
58. Kirk never got "dumped" by a woman for an intergalactic busy body named
after a letter of the alphabet.
57. Kirk never wore green tights and frolicked about in Sherwood Forest.
56. If there was ever a Klingon on Kirk's bridge, Kirk would likely be
dead.
55. Ever hear of a bar shooter called "Make it so?" No? How about a
"Beam me up Scotty" then? See the difference?
54. One Word: Miniskirts.
53. Kirk's girlfriends always look good in soft light.
52. Kirk never went anywhere without a whole bunch of guys in red
shirts.
51. Kirk's first officer didn't play some wimpy instrument like the
trombone.
50. Kirk had more dates than his first officer.
49. The extent of Kirk's knowledge of Klingon vocabulary can be roughly
translated as "GO F*CK YOURSELF."
48. If something doesn't speak English -- it's toast.
47. Kirk wasn't some prissy archaeology fan.
46. Picard's middle name isn't tough or awe-inspiring like Tiberius is.
45. If Kirk finds a strange spinning probe, he blows it up.
44. Picard never met Joan Collins.
43. Picard flunked his entrance exams to Starfleet.
42 Picard hasn't fathered any children; Kirk -- probably millions.
41. Kirk has a cool phaser -- not some pansy Braun mix-master.
40. Two Words: Line Delivery.
39. Picard grew up on a quaint little French vineyard, squishing grapes
with his toes, while Kirk slung bails of wheat and hay
in Iowa to put himself through school.
38. Kirk emphasizes his orations with pertinent hand gestures.
37. Kirk once made a cannon out of bamboo, sulphur, potassium nitrate,
charcoal and then fired diamonds into the hearts of his
enemies. (Need we say more?)
36. Kirk is not put off by green skin.
35. Kirk knows how to deal with peace loving hippy goofs.
34. Kirk once fought a Greek god. And won.
33. Kirk barely asks for suggestions. And if he does, he asks Spock only.
32. Kirk doesn't let the doctor tell him what to do.
31. One Word: Fisticuffs.
30. Kirk's name is hated throughout the galaxy.
29. Kirk appreciates Shakespeare, but he doesn't let it show.
28. You can never lock up Kirk for very long.
27. Kirk's eulogies can actually make you cry.
26. Kirk plays god with lesser cultures, and then exploits them for
resources.
25. Kirk's son would never drop out to become a musician.
24. Kirk can climb up a Jeffries Tube and fix anything.
23. Kirk never hired an engineer with punk glasses.
22. The Klingons didn't have a word for surrender -- until they met Kirk.
21. Kirk's bridge is not beige.
20.Two Words: Crane Shots.
19. Picard likes wimpy violin music -- and coerces Data into playing it.
18. Picard allows cats on board, while Kirk beams away even really cute
things, like Tribbles.
17. Kirk is a cultural icon -- Picard is just some guy who's really nice.
16. Kirk specifically ordered a swivel LA-Z-BOY for the bridge.
15. Kirk would never touch SYNTHAHOL.
14. Kirk looks distinguished in reading glasses -- and nobody dares to
call him"four eyes."
13. Kirk can infiltrate Gangsters, Nazis, and even the Pentagon -- easily.
12. Picard likes painting nudes, for art's sake.
11. When Kirk doesn't trust the Romulans, he fires at them. When Picard
doesn't trust the Romulans, he gets fired at.
10. Kirk never once, ever,wore a wiener wrapping Speedo banana hammock on
shore leave.
9. Kirk never gets his command codes locked out by some pimply acting
ensign.
8. Kirk doesn't test the engines -- he just fires them up.
7. When Kirk says "Boldly Go," he MEANS it.
6. Three Words: Flying Leg Kick
5. Picard's crew would never ever think of him as a sexual object.
4. Kirk traveled through The Great Barrier, met God, and wasn't even
impressed.
3. Kirk's bedroom is a passion pit with electric sheets.
2. Kirk would never let his Chief of Security wear a ponytail.
1. One Word: Balls.


wow
Link Posted: 7/10/2008 9:03:05 AM EST
Kirk?

Picard FTW!!

Link Posted: 7/10/2008 9:03:08 AM EST
[Last Edit: 7/10/2008 9:05:51 AM EST by Zan]
Remember the original episode where Kirk decided to give weapons to a village that was being attacked by Klingon trained raiders? He did that because he wasn't allowed to directly help them. Let that sink in, and tell me how anyone could vote for the Frenchman.

Not only is Kirk better than Captain Metrosexual but so is Spock and Scotty.


Link Posted: 7/10/2008 9:03:11 AM EST
James Tiberious Kirk!!!!
Link Posted: 7/10/2008 9:03:29 AM EST

Originally Posted By Kharn:
How many ladies did Picard bed during TNG? Yeah, I thought so.

Plus there's the whole issue of Cabin Boy Wesley...

Kharn


+1. Kirk made the moves on at least one alien chick every episode, usually with some success.

It's such a part of the script that when my son and I watched it in addition to predicting which member of the landing party wouldn't come back, we could predict which hot alien chick or even crew member would be swapping spit with Kirk before the end of the show.
Link Posted: 7/10/2008 9:04:56 AM EST
Just think, 10,000 years from now, Shatner's seed will have infected most of the universe.
Link Posted: 7/10/2008 9:05:30 AM EST
Picard.
Link Posted: 7/10/2008 9:06:18 AM EST
James T. Kirk, FTW...

Picard is teh ghey...
Link Posted: 7/10/2008 9:08:24 AM EST
They both were good but have to go with Kirk cause I am a bowhunter.




Link Posted: 7/10/2008 9:08:46 AM EST
Picard was a real actor!
Link Posted: 7/10/2008 9:10:28 AM EST
[Last Edit: 7/10/2008 9:10:41 AM EST by kitwulfen]
Which one would I want to serve with?

Kirk. Definitely Kirk.

That way I could try and get my hands on Lt. M'ress.



What, did you think I was going to vote for that bald Frenchman who has to have a Counselor on board to discuss his feelings with? Screw that. I'm going for the bad ass who has a fine furry female working in Engineering.
Link Posted: 7/10/2008 9:13:43 AM EST
Picard traipsed around the galaxy in the family truckster with his therapist in tow, Kirk kicked ass and banged green chicks, Indian princesses, and any other alien female that stood still long enough for him to get his pants down. Kirk, accept no substitute.

Link Posted: 7/10/2008 9:14:40 AM EST


From Star Trek III

"My God, what have I done?" -- Kirk

"What you always do. Turn death into a fighting chance to live." -- McCoy


Kirk all the way
Link Posted: 7/10/2008 9:14:53 AM EST
[Last Edit: 7/10/2008 9:15:56 AM EST by DWFAN]
Kirk


eta- He laid more pipe than the Mario Brothers
Link Posted: 7/10/2008 9:16:43 AM EST

Originally Posted By kitwulfen:
Which one would I want to serve with?

Kirk. Definitely Kirk.

That way I could try and get my hands on Lt. M'ress.



What, did you think I was going to vote for that bald Frenchman who has to have a Counselor on board to discuss his feelings with? Screw that. I'm going for the bad ass who has a fine furry female working in Engineering.


I believe the fan's love of Kirk is the entire reason Riker's existence on TNG. Riker WAS kirk. He had no problem running around blowing shit up and banging alien chicks.
Link Posted: 7/10/2008 9:17:36 AM EST

Originally Posted By HardShell:
Archer


"Enterprise" could have been a great series if they would have stayed away from all that temporal bullshit.

Link Posted: 7/10/2008 9:17:44 AM EST
Is everyone forgetting Picards assimilation and then kicking the borgs ass later.

And don't tell me that none of you see the sexual tension between Kirk and Spock

Link Posted: 7/10/2008 9:19:35 AM EST

Originally Posted By PrairiePhoenix:
Is everyone forgetting Picards assimilation and then kicking the borgs ass later.

And don't tell me that none of you see the sexual tension between Kirk and Spock



YOU might have seen it...I didn't.

Now McCoy and Spock, that's a different story....
Link Posted: 7/10/2008 9:21:39 AM EST
Picard FTW. He got some action, he just preferred humans.
Link Posted: 7/10/2008 9:21:39 AM EST
ghey
Link Posted: 7/10/2008 9:22:43 AM EST
'Nuff said:



Kirk FTW
Link Posted: 7/10/2008 9:23:41 AM EST

Originally Posted By The_Gooch:
'Nuff said:
img.photobucket.com/albums/v223/tula1954sks/misc/pq377.jpg


Kirk FTW


/thread
Link Posted: 7/10/2008 9:26:49 AM EST
Picard couldn't hold Kirk's jock strap.
Link Posted: 7/10/2008 9:27:35 AM EST
Kirk = Colt

Picard = Bushmaster

Both good enough to do the job, but one just...has it.
Link Posted: 7/10/2008 9:31:10 AM EST

Originally Posted By PrairiePhoenix:
And don't tell me that none of you see the sexual tension between Kirk and Spock



It's called, "Projecting".

Look into it.
Link Posted: 7/10/2008 9:31:16 AM EST
Kirk. I can't believe this is even close.
Link Posted: 7/10/2008 9:32:46 AM EST

Originally Posted By The_Gooch:
'Nuff said:
img.photobucket.com/albums/v223/tula1954sks/misc/pq377.jpg


Kirk FTW


What the in Fvck!
Link Posted: 7/10/2008 9:33:33 AM EST
Picard FTW!

He wrecked 2 Enterprises, one to kill his clone. How many did Kirk wreck?
Link Posted: 7/10/2008 9:36:34 AM EST
who the hell is archer?
Link Posted: 7/10/2008 9:38:25 AM EST

Originally Posted By VBC:
Just think, 10,000 years from now, Shatner's seed will have infected most of the universe.



Bond's seed will kill it just before it gets a roundhouse from Chuck Norris.
Link Posted: 7/10/2008 9:41:54 AM EST
Capt. Pike would kick both there asses from his wheelchair but Kirk over Picard easy
Link Posted: 7/10/2008 9:44:46 AM EST
Captain James Tiberius Kirk, the original and still the best captain of the Enterprise.
Flyingrhino
Link Posted: 7/10/2008 9:48:13 AM EST

Originally Posted By Infallible:
Kirk wins hands down for not being French alone.
Anyone who votes Picard has a latent homosexual desire for bald old men wearing leotards.

i2.photobucket.com/albums/y48/InFALaBill/aagorn3ic1.jpg



+ 1,000,000
Link Posted: 7/10/2008 9:49:32 AM EST
FWIW, Kirk would have wrecked 7 of 9.

Kirk
/thread
Link Posted: 7/10/2008 9:59:42 AM EST

Originally Posted By flyingrhino:
Captain James Tiberius Kirk, the original and still the best captain of the Enterprise.
Flyingrhino


Sorry but I can't let this discretion slide.
Capt. Kirk replaced Capt. Pike who replaced Capt. April but I get what you meant
Link Posted: 7/10/2008 10:02:43 AM EST

Originally Posted By out-a-ammo:

Originally Posted By HardShell:
Archer


"Enterprise" could have been a great series if they would have stayed away from all that temporal bullshit.



I actually didn't mind the concept; it was just poorly done.
Link Posted: 7/10/2008 10:03:24 AM EST
OK, let's be serious:

"Jean Luc" or "James Tiberius"?

French or American?

Acting like a Klingon or killing them by the ship load?

Earl Grey Tea or Romulan Ale?

There can be only one...

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