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Posted: 9/2/2010 10:11:32 AM EDT
Cocain in particular. I am distraught and don't know what to do right now.
Will those whom believe in the power of prayer pray for my son Joshua?
Link Posted: 9/2/2010 10:12:53 AM EDT
Prayers sent.

Offer help and if he doesn't want it stop supporting him.
Link Posted: 9/2/2010 10:14:00 AM EDT
Without hookers?

Seriously, put him in a rehab program.

Link Posted: 9/2/2010 10:14:10 AM EDT
Prayers for your whole family.

If you need help there are some damn fine folks in the HTF.
Link Posted: 9/2/2010 10:14:45 AM EDT
Prayers sent.
Link Posted: 9/2/2010 10:15:08 AM EDT
Do whatever it takes to straighten him out

I have an older brother that ruined his life (and I'm 46)


I will keep You and Him in my prayers, I fear you
are in for a rough ride, but you will make it through.

Link Posted: 9/2/2010 10:15:14 AM EDT
Do more than pray...
Link Posted: 9/2/2010 10:15:40 AM EDT
Link Posted: 9/2/2010 10:15:44 AM EDT
Prayers sent for you and your family. Hope this gets fixed quickly.
Link Posted: 9/2/2010 10:15:55 AM EDT
I've seen that stuff ruin 2 lives.

Get right on it.
Link Posted: 9/2/2010 10:16:19 AM EDT
Time for a big man to man talk, isolate him from the bad friends, and lock up rehab if needed.
Link Posted: 9/2/2010 10:16:29 AM EDT
Originally Posted By jmb_nova:
Do more than pray...


I certainly will.
Link Posted: 9/2/2010 10:16:32 AM EDT
Is he any different than Dad was at his age? Some people learn through their mistakes.
Link Posted: 9/2/2010 10:16:35 AM EDT
Step 1: Introduce his ass your your foot.

Step 2: Get him to rehab, STAT
Link Posted: 9/2/2010 10:16:56 AM EDT
Drugs can mean lots of things from cigs, over the counter pills to shooting heroin.

Even motion sickness pills are considered "drugs".
Link Posted: 9/2/2010 10:17:38 AM EDT
After my initial urge of "beat him senseless with a blackjack" passed, I would begin by stripping him of absolutely everything you have ever provided him.

No car. No cell phone. No bedroom door. No bed. No clothing/shoes/etc. that you bought for him, except for those which you provide him to wear the following day. No food other than oatmeal made with water. Drop him off at school personally, and likewise when picking him up. No more after-school or extracurricular activities. No more TV - only school textbooks and any other books which are required reading. No more music. No more computer, except for when completely supervised for school project research.

And especially, no more inheritance.

He may earn these things back in an order, and at a rate, of your choosing, little by little, for every piss test he passes.

If he has yet to satisfy you that he has rehabilitated himself, his 18th birthday present should be a hand-written card that says "Happy Birthday!" on the front, and "Pack your shit and get the fuck out." on the inside.

But hey, I only have a 3 year old girl –– so I only suppose this will work.

_MaH
Link Posted: 9/2/2010 10:17:45 AM EDT

Originally Posted By Flathead9:

Step 1: Introduce his ass your your foot.

And repeat as necessary.


Link Posted: 9/2/2010 10:17:56 AM EDT
Ass whooping and then rehab. Take away anything that he enjoys doing and tell him he can't have them back until he can pass a drug test. I know of too many friends who fucked their lives up while their parents just sat back and watched. If you really want to help him, turn your hardass mode on now.
Link Posted: 9/2/2010 10:18:07 AM EDT
I live pretty close to Bristol, and so my little town has more than it's fair share of Cocaine. At one time I am sure there were as many 18-30 year olds sneaking a quick snort in as there were under 18 year olds sneaking a bit of cheap Cider when they could get it.

This is the West Country, so that's quite a lot of Cider, for reference.I think a lot of these young guys and girls treat it as they would Cannabis or Alcohol - something to do every Friday and Saturday night.

I hope you can help out your son.

Link Posted: 9/2/2010 10:18:41 AM EDT
where is your kid getting money for coke?
Link Posted: 9/2/2010 10:18:45 AM EDT
[Last Edit: 9/2/2010 10:20:46 AM EDT by sarahjane]
Prayers...but you need to cut him off from all his access to drugs and the scum bags who help him obtain them...reham- boot camp- something- move- don't let him ruin his life.

He may be one of the kids that just wanted to try it and move on or he may like cocaine a little too much- don't risk it.
Link Posted: 9/2/2010 10:18:46 AM EDT
I'll pray that you don't get caught.

You have some hunting to do, get busy.
Link Posted: 9/2/2010 10:18:47 AM EDT
PM me. He's going to need help, but he'll need more than that, too.
Link Posted: 9/2/2010 10:18:49 AM EDT
[Last Edit: 9/2/2010 10:21:21 AM EDT by FueledByGuinness]
Is he doing it with friends on the weekends or full blown coke head?
Either way, nip this in the bud because recreational can turn into full time in a hurry.
Link Posted: 9/2/2010 10:18:52 AM EDT
Originally Posted By tojan19:
Time for a big man to man talk, isolate him from the bad friends, and lock up rehab if needed.


This... let his friends know that if any of them are involved in supplying him, they will be going to jail... if they are lucky.

You need to put your foot on his neck and get him into rehab right fucking now.
Link Posted: 9/2/2010 10:18:59 AM EDT
[Last Edit: 9/2/2010 10:20:24 AM EDT by marksman121]
Originally Posted By MillerSHO:
Drugs can mean lots of things from cigs, over the counter pills to shooting heroin.

Even motion sickness pills are considered "drugs".


Thats just dandy. OP's son is using coke. And yes those are drugs.


Prayers sent. OP do you know your son's friends? Bet they are who go him into it.
Link Posted: 9/2/2010 10:19:01 AM EDT
dont sweat it, he is young, experimenting, get him some education, help if its an addiction and not just for recreation.
Link Posted: 9/2/2010 10:20:41 AM EDT

Originally Posted By MillerSHO:
Drugs can mean lots of things from cigs, over the counter pills to shooting heroin.

Even motion sickness pills are considered "drugs".

Reading is fundamental. 17 year olds shouldn't be doing cocaine.
Link Posted: 9/2/2010 10:21:12 AM EDT
Prayers inbound. Now, go turn his fucking world upside down.
Link Posted: 9/2/2010 10:21:44 AM EDT

Originally Posted By NoVaGator:
where is your kid getting money for coke?

Over here a gram may set you back between £20 and £40, from what I have read. That's supposed to be 10-20 lines, dependent on strength.
Link Posted: 9/2/2010 10:22:32 AM EDT
Originally Posted By AKSU:
Is he any different than Dad was at his age? Some people learn through their mistakes.


Yes much different, I have never used drugs. ,cocaine, pot, meth none of of it.
Link Posted: 9/2/2010 10:22:58 AM EDT
His ASS and your BOOT need to meet!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!


Repeat as necessary and then call the cops and get him into rehab yesterday.

Prayers for you guys as well!!!
Link Posted: 9/2/2010 10:23:03 AM EDT
Prayers sent

on a side note, how did you find out?
Link Posted: 9/2/2010 10:23:03 AM EDT

Originally Posted By bonnevillain:
dont sweat it, he is young, experimenting, get him some education, help if its an addiction and not just for recreation.

There is a difference between trying it once and doing repeat "experiments". One way or another, the OP is going to wind up missing money if he stands by watching his son develop a coke habit.
Link Posted: 9/2/2010 10:23:15 AM EDT
Hope you can turn thing around.
Link Posted: 9/2/2010 10:24:38 AM EDT

Originally Posted By millfire517:
His ASS and your BOOT need to meet!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!


Repeat as necessary and then call the cops and get him into rehab yesterday.

Prayers for you guys as well!!!

Bad idea.
Link Posted: 9/2/2010 10:25:33 AM EDT
Originally Posted By GrIlLa:
Cocain in particular. I am distraught and don't know what to do right now.
Will those whom believe in the power of prayer pray for my son Joshua?


How did you come by this information? Are you certain it's accurate?

Thoughts are with you buddy. Coke got pretty big in my high school, living in a wealthy bedroom community where kids had lots of free time and parents money to spend on that trash. Turned my back on many friends over that shit.
Link Posted: 9/2/2010 10:26:06 AM EDT

Originally Posted By Cromlech:

Originally Posted By NoVaGator:
where is your kid getting money for coke?

Over here a gram may set you back between £20 and £40, from what I have read. That's supposed to be 10-20 lines, dependent on strength.


Hm, I always thought it would be pricier than that. Dunno why.
Link Posted: 9/2/2010 10:26:33 AM EDT
Originally Posted By odiedodi:

Originally Posted By millfire517:
His ASS and your BOOT need to meet!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!


Repeat as necessary and then call the cops and get him into rehab yesterday.





Prayers for you guys as well!!!

Bad idea.


Very bad idea. Unless OP wants all his belongings to go to a police auction.
Link Posted: 9/2/2010 10:29:25 AM EDT
Kicking his ass and totally alienating him is the surest way to make sure he becomes a full blown coke head and ruins his (and maybe your) life.

In my limited experience with coke heads, I have observed that some people are really sensitive to cocaine's effects. I went to a fancy private university, so i can tell you that most people that use cocaine 1, or 5, or 50 times do not have much trouble outgrowing it. Some people, though, are never the same after their first time.

I guess my point is, your son is by no means a lost cause, or an "addict." so be careful not to push him away.
Link Posted: 9/2/2010 10:29:48 AM EDT

Originally Posted By odiedodi:

Originally Posted By millfire517:
His ASS and your BOOT need to meet!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!


Repeat as necessary and then call the cops and get him into rehab yesterday.

Prayers for you guys as well!!!

Bad idea.

The only reason I say call the cops is hopefully since the kid is still a juvenile it will scare him into not wanting to go down this road. A lot of times this approach will scare the kids straight.
Link Posted: 9/2/2010 10:29:59 AM EDT
yes
Link Posted: 9/2/2010 10:30:13 AM EDT
[Last Edit: 9/2/2010 10:32:08 AM EDT by easttxshooter]
Think about this. What would Red of that 70's show do?

On a more serious note, my brother screwed his VERY bright future up in high school with all sorts of drugs. 7 years later he is doing ok now. I'll keep you in my prayers.

ETA: my dad kicked my brother out and cut him off completely. no contact for a couple years. my bro lived a shithole trailer trash park on the sabine river for a few years, got tired of it, and decided he wanted to change.
Link Posted: 9/2/2010 10:30:16 AM EDT
Prayers sent.

OP, I know you want to help, but if he doesn't wanna stop, you won't make him
Link Posted: 9/2/2010 10:30:19 AM EDT
You might be in for a long, difficult haul. I'm sorry for your troubles.
Link Posted: 9/2/2010 10:30:19 AM EDT
Originally Posted By bonnevillain:
dont sweat it, he is young, experimenting, get him some education, help if its an addiction and not just for recreation.



He is 17. I would sweat the shit out of it. He is below the "recreational use" threshold age. He is well outside the "norm" for that age group. I would say his current use is a symptom of other behavior issues. He will soon only be surrounded by turds as the normal crew will move on.

At this point, everyone he hangs out with is a piece of shit. I don't know a single person doing that stuff at that age who is not fucked up/dead right now. (i'm 30)

You have a 3-4 year window to get him cleared up, or he is screwed. I like Mhoffmans approach. It may feel like you are driving him away, but he needs to fall fast and extremely hard.

For what it's worth, I just attended the funeral of a childhood best friend last week. Again. Heroin...Again. The key to ALL these situations was a continuing pattern of enabling behavior by those around them. That is your biggest battle. You need to locate some good treatment sources and be prepared and willing to face some serious soul-searching yourself. Treatment is not only about him.

I wish the best for you and your family, and hope your son finds the peace he is looking for.
Link Posted: 9/2/2010 10:31:30 AM EDT
im only 25 so im closer to his age than most here.. buddy, its the people hes hanging with. period.

lock down is the only way. school or work. then home..

parents did it to me when I was his age.(not for drugs, skipin school). took everything out of my room, except my bed... even took the door off.. couldnt leave at all.
they rode me to school and picked me up.. mom had probation officers in school up my ass too..

it worked to say the least..

personal experience from just a few years ago... the people I hung around were the main influence on anything wrong I did..once I realized they WERE losers and going nowhere in life, I made new friends and never looked back..

Link Posted: 9/2/2010 10:31:33 AM EDT

Originally Posted By odiedodi:

Originally Posted By bonnevillain:
dont sweat it, he is young, experimenting, get him some education, help if its an addiction and not just for recreation.

There is a difference between trying it once and doing repeat "experiments". One way or another, the OP is going to wind up missing money if he stands by watching his son develop a coke habit.

maybe, maybe not. You and I dont know anything. It could just be kids experimenting, Im not saying to let it slide. But to fuck his world up could make things much, much worse. Be a loving parent, get him the help he needs.
Link Posted: 9/2/2010 10:31:43 AM EDT
Really, your plan of action should be based on your current and past relationship with your kid. If he does not have a relationship that he cherishes with you in the first place, hard action will just push him father away.

How often is the use, daily, weekly, monthly?

Is it a party thing or just hang out and get high thing?
Link Posted: 9/2/2010 10:32:12 AM EDT
Coke!! Damn man sorry to hear that! You need to beat his ass!
Link Posted: 9/2/2010 10:32:15 AM EDT
Prayers sent.
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