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Posted: 9/28/2004 8:15:33 AM EDT
[Last Edit: 9/28/2004 8:18:02 AM EDT by lippo]
You Michgian guys will understand!

Jeff Foxworthy on Michigan:

- If you consider it a sport to gather your food by drilling through 18 inches of ice and sitting there all day hoping that the food will swim by, you might live in Michigan.
-If you're proud that your region makes the national news 96 nights each year because Pelston is the coldest spot in the nation, you might live in Michigan.
-If your local Dairy Queen is closed from November through March, you might live in Michigan
-If you instinctively walk like a penguin for five months out of the year, you might live in Michigan. --If someone in a store offers you assistance, and they don't work there, you might live in Michigan.
-If your dad's suntan stops at a line curving around the middle of his forehead, you might live in Michigan.
-If you have worn shorts and a parka at the same time, you might live in Michigan.
-If your town has an equal number of bars and churches, you might live in Michigan.
-If you have had a lengthy telephone conversation with someone who dialed a wrong number, you might live in Michigan.

1. "Vacation" means going up north past I-69 for the weekend.
2. You measure distance in hours.
3. You know several people who have hit a deer more than once.
4. You often switch from "heat" to "A/C" in the same day and back again.
5. You can drive 65 mph through 2 feet of snow during a raging blizzard, without flinching.
6. You see people wearing camouflage at social events. (including weddings).
7. You install security lights on your house and garage and leave both unlocked.
8. You carry jumper cables in your car and your girlfriend knows how to use them.
9. You design your kid's Halloween costume to fit over a snowsuit.
10. Driving is better in the winter because the potholes are filled with snow. Yep!
11. You know all 4 seasons: almost winter, winter, still winter and road construction.
12. You can identify a southern or eastern accent.
13. Your idea of creative landscaping is a statue of a deer next to your blue spruce.
14. You were unaware that there is a legal drinking age.
15. Down South to you means Indiana.
16. A brat is something you eat.
17. Your neighbor throws a party to celebrate his new pole shed.
18. You go out to fish fry every Friday.
19. Your 4th of July picnic was moved indoors due to frost.
20. You have more miles on your snow blower than your car.
21. You find 0 degrees "a little chilly."
22. You actually understand these jokes, and you forward them to all your Michigan friends.
Link Posted: 9/28/2004 8:20:30 AM EDT


Link Posted: 9/28/2004 8:25:11 AM EDT
23. The local schools all close down for Opening Day.

Link Posted: 9/28/2004 8:37:19 AM EDT
24. Everybody follows behind the state trooper on I-75 going 85 MPH and then slow down again when he exits.

that's a MI classic
Link Posted: 9/28/2004 8:39:37 AM EDT
He forgot, you know what yooper means.
Link Posted: 9/28/2004 8:53:00 AM EDT
[Last Edit: 9/28/2004 8:53:49 AM EDT by Q3131A]
[Hijack]You might be a Floridian if:

You exhibit a slight twitch when introduced to anyone with the first name of Charley, Frances, Ivan or Jeanne.

Your freezer never has more than $20 worth of food in it any given time

You're looking at paint swatches for the plywood on your windows, to accent the house color
You think of your hall closet/saferoom as "cozy"

Your pool is more accurately described as "framed in" than "screened in"

Your freezer in the garage now only has homemade ice in it

You no longer worry about relatives visiting during the summer months

You, too, haven't heard back from the insurance adjuster

You now understand what that little "2% hurricane deductible" phrase really means

You're putting a collage together on your driveway of roof shingles from your neighborhood

You were once proud of your 16" electric chain saw

Your Street has more than 3 "NO WAKE" signs posted

You now own 5 large ice chests

Your parrot can now say" hammered, pounded and hunker down"

You recognize people in line at the free ice, gas and plywood locations

You stop what you're doing and clap and wave when you see convoy of power company trucks come down your street

You're depressed when they don't stop

You have the personal cell phone numbers of the managers for: plywood, roofing supplies and generators at Home Depot on your speed dialer

You've spent more than $20 on "Tall white kitchen bags" to make your own sand bags

You're considering upgrading your 16" to a 20" chainsaw

You know what "Bar chain oil" is

You're thinking of getting your wife the hardhat with the ear protector and face shield for Christmas

You now think the $6000 whole house generator seems reasonable

You look forward to discussions about the merits of "cubed, block and dry ice"

Your therapist refers to your condition as "generator envy"

You fight the urge to put on your winter coat and wool cap and parade around in front of your picture window, when you finally get power and your neighbor across the street, with the noisy generator, doesn't get electric

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