Is self administered surgery in all our futures?

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[ARCHIVED THREAD] - Is self administered surgery in all our futures?

Posted: 11/21/2012 6:51:53 PM EDT

Who's ready for .gov healthcare for everyone!

Posted: 11/21/2012 7:57:02 PM EDT

[#1]

Someone snipped a tendril off of the bottom of their tongue awhile back. I wonder if anyone besides me remembers that thread.

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Posted: 11/21/2012 8:22:19 PM EDT

[#2]

That's some fucked up shit, man.

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Posted: 11/21/2012 8:35:14 PM EDT

[#3]

Robots.

Posted: 11/21/2012 8:42:54 PM EDT

[#4]

Don't worry it'll be a felony to perform any form of medical treatment without a license. gov authorization, and to use non FDA approval materials.

So when you cut yourself, do not reach for a shop rag, electrical tape and a flask of whiskey, install call your designated health care administrator and hope they can treat you before you bleed to death or from an infection. Failure to do so will cost you your 2A and voting privileges, some time in jail, and a raping of your bank accounts. This is for your own good after all. Don't question it. Gov knows better than you.
Don't think this can happen? WTF do I need to sign for some allergy pills?

Posted: 11/21/2012 8:57:46 PM EDT

[#5]

and eating leafy green vegetables puts oncologists out of work

Posted: 11/21/2012 9:01:04 PM EDT

[#6]

I'm not surprised by these animals.

Posted: 11/21/2012 9:28:55 PM EDT

[#7]

Quoted:
Don't worry it'll be a felony to perform any form of medical treatment without a license. gov authorization, and to use non FDA approval materials.

So when you cut yourself, do not reach for a shop rag, electrical tape and a flask of whiskey, install call your designated health care administrator and hope they can treat you before you bleed to death or from an infection. Failure to do so will cost you your 2A and voting privileges, some time in jail, and a raping of your bank accounts. This is for your own good after all. Don't question it. Gov knows better than you.

Don't think this can happen? WTF do I need to sign for some allergy pills?

most all medical devices are only legally allowed to be sold to a physician or under their orders.

Everything at work is stamped with that warning. From the drugs down to cotton swabs and bandages.

Also the surgical chinese finger traps. Those are cool.

And while you can get most of them from wally world, the ones sent to the hospital are regulated.

Also, I once cut out a wart with a spyderco a pair of pliers and a bottle of whiskey... Right out of my big toe.

Posted: 11/21/2012 10:22:21 PM EDT

[#8]

That's nothing. One time I cut a sebaceous cyst out of my butt. It was about an inch and a half away from my heinie hole. I used my dissecting kit from college biology, superglue, and a bandaid to do the job and effect the repair. The first cut hurt like hell, but I almost passed out on the second cut, which wouldn't have been to good considering I was standing in front of the bathroom door bent over looking between my legs at the mirror. Of course it may have been the position I was in that almost caused the blackout. After I dug everything out I used the glass eye dropper in the kit to flush the wound with peroxide which almost caused another blackout. Finished it up, squirted superglue all over it, and put the bandaid over it.

Hurt like hell, but sure beat having a Dr with his hands stuck back there touching me.

I'm not lying. Simple surgeries aren't that big a deal if you can handle a little pain.

Posted: 11/22/2012 12:56:37 AM EDT

[#9]

Quoted:
That's nothing. One time I cut a sebaceous cyst out of my butt. It was about an inch and a half away from my heinie hole. I used my dissecting kit from college biology, superglue, and a bandaid to do the job and effect the repair. The first cut hurt like hell, but I almost passed out on the second cut, which wouldn't have been to good considering I was standing in front of the bathroom door bent over looking between my legs at the mirror. Of course it may have been the position I was in that almost caused the blackout. After I dug everything out I used the glass eye dropper in the kit to flush the wound with peroxide which almost caused another blackout. Finished it up, squirted superglue all over it, and put the bandaid over it.

Hurt like hell, but sure beat having a Dr with his hands stuck back there touching me.

I'm not lying. Simple surgeries aren't that big a deal if you can handle a little pain.

And why didn't you post this on YouTube?

Posted: 11/22/2012 1:06:03 AM EDT

[#10]

I've extracted an impacted broken molar and I've stitched up a cut in my hand. I'd rather not do either again.

Posted: 11/22/2012 1:13:59 AM EDT

[#11]

If you can't at the very least get an EMT-I you are not a conservative, and you do not believe in hard work and American ingenuity.

Posted: 11/22/2012 1:19:14 AM EDT

[#12]

Wait so did he get it all out? Didn't sound like he was clueless to what he was doing, except that he used some pretty fucked up tools and looked like a staph infection waiting to happen. Any word on post-op?

Posted: 11/22/2012 1:37:34 AM EDT

[#13]

Fucked up but if they sterilized the shit out of everything and practiced proper wound care it probably was orders of magnitude better than surgery two centuries ago and on par with a century ago. Not that good but people lived through it then.

Also they didn't do a good job excising it all. Guess that's why some people go to a school for that kinda thing.

Posted: 11/22/2012 3:06:35 AM EDT

[#14]

Quoted:

Quoted:
That's nothing. One time I cut a sebaceous cyst out of my butt. It was about an inch and a half away from my heinie hole. I used my dissecting kit from college biology, superglue, and a bandaid to do the job and effect the repair. The first cut hurt like hell, but I almost passed out on the second cut, which wouldn't have been to good considering I was standing in front of the bathroom door bent over looking between my legs at the mirror. Of course it may have been the position I was in that almost caused the blackout. After I dug everything out I used the glass eye dropper in the kit to flush the wound with peroxide which almost caused another blackout. Finished it up, squirted superglue all over it, and put the bandaid over it.

Hurt like hell, but sure beat having a Dr with his hands stuck back there touching me.

I'm not lying. Simple surgeries aren't that big a deal if you can handle a little pain.

And why didn't you post this on YouTube?

YouTube didn't exist back then. This was in 1992.

Posted: 11/22/2012 3:15:00 AM EDT

[#15]

Quoted:
Wait so did he get it all out? Didn't sound like he was clueless to what he was doing, except that he used some pretty fucked up tools and looked like a staph infection waiting to happen. Any word on post-op?

There's a few videos to it. I didn't watch them, but they tell the full story, this is just one of the videos. Google yknot dwain williams to find this one, and you'll then have the rest. In a news story about it in one of its in the google search he said it was successful and took 10 weeks to fully heal.

Posted: 11/22/2012 6:31:02 AM EDT

[#16]

Quoted:

Quoted:

Don't worry it'll be a felony to perform any form of medical treatment without a license. gov authorization, and to use non FDA approval materials.

So when you cut yourself, do not reach for a shop rag, electrical tape and a flask of whiskey, install call your designated health care administrator and hope they can treat you before you bleed to death or from an infection. Failure to do so will cost you your 2A and voting privileges, some time in jail, and a raping of your bank accounts. This is for your own good after all. Don't question it. Gov knows better than you.
Don't think this can happen? WTF do I need to sign for some allergy pills?

most all medical devices are only legally allowed to be sold to a physician or under their orders.

Everything at work is stamped with that warning. From the drugs down to cotton swabs and bandages.

Also the surgical chinese finger traps. Those are cool.

And while you can get most of them from wally world, the ones sent to the hospital are regulated.

Also, I once cut out a wart with a spyderco a pair of pliers and a bottle of whiskey... Right out of my big toe.

I'm sure somewhere in that 2000 page law that's illegal.