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Posted: 1/14/2006 10:49:41 PM EDT
[#1]
Sounds like a pain in the ass.
Thank you, I'm here all week. Try the veal. |
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Posted: 1/14/2006 10:52:24 PM EDT
[#2]
Thats what bothers us. |
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Posted: 1/14/2006 11:07:01 PM EDT
[#3]
My brother had hemmoroiodal surgery, after every other possible alterntive had been exhausted. They gave him some intraveneous medication that killed the pain of the operation, but he pretty much stuck to a liquid diet for a week or so because it really hurt to crap.
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Posted: 1/14/2006 11:09:46 PM EDT
[#4]
I'm glad I'm not you.
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Posted: 1/14/2006 11:12:21 PM EDT
[#5]
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Posted: 1/14/2006 11:13:10 PM EDT
[#6]
Honestly, there's worse things than hemmorhoid surgery.
Like waking up with a hard cock on your cheek. You'll be fine. |
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Posted: 1/14/2006 11:15:29 PM EDT
[#7]
It varies. If you didn't let it go as long as I did, it is outpatient. I put it off until I was having pain, so it took a lot of cutting and they kept me overnight with one of those morphine gizmos that you hit the button when you have pain. By morning, I was able to sit long enough to get home. I did not want to sit too long for several days. Think I took a week off. I won't BS you, it was uncomfortable, but after a couple days it was better than what I had been going through. My Dr gave me stool softner and instrucitions to eat lots of fiber. I listen to them now. Fiber is your friend. Hopefully yours are not as extensive as mine and it will be an easier proceedure. I checked around with other 'victims' and my primary care physician, and almost all of them recommended one Dr in my area. I'd recommend you do the same research.
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Posted: 1/14/2006 11:25:19 PM EDT
[#8]
Good luck with the surgery.
<-- Nasty Link Removed --> -- brass @ • 1-15-06 |
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Posted: 1/14/2006 11:28:24 PM EDT
[#9]
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Posted: 1/14/2006 11:29:55 PM EDT
[#10]
It's probably more painful than they say.
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Posted: 1/14/2006 11:37:21 PM EDT
[#12]
Oh my fucking god. It looks like he has a purple donut on his ass! 
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Posted: 1/14/2006 11:39:14 PM EDT
[#13]
I just threw up! WTF!!!! |
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Posted: 1/15/2006 12:10:25 AM EDT
[#14]
Yeah, I figured you'd all enjoy that. I'm just tryin to help an ARFCOMer out. Help him realize that, hey, it could be worse.
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Posted: 1/15/2006 12:20:48 AM EDT
[#15]
YOU ARE ONE SICK FUCKER!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! |
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Posted: 1/15/2006 12:21:43 AM EDT
[#16]
+1
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Posted: 1/15/2006 12:24:04 AM EDT
[#17]
What the hell is on that dudes ass??
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Posted: 1/15/2006 12:24:59 AM EDT
[#18]
hemmorhoids |
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Posted: 1/15/2006 2:51:08 AM EDT
[#19]
Mmmm. . . Globe grapes.
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Posted: 1/15/2006 3:04:24 AM EDT
[#20]
What?? That shit looks like someone taped a plum on his pucker hole. You cant be serious. Its so big it looks like he couldnt even shit cause his ass is plugged!! |
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Posted: 1/15/2006 3:35:38 AM EDT
[#21]
+1 on that |
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Posted: 1/15/2006 3:46:03 AM EDT
[#22]
I'm no doctor but I think thats an example of a rectal prolapse which is different from a 'roid. www.nlm.nih.gov/medlineplus/ency/article/001132.htm  |
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Posted: 1/15/2006 4:01:28 AM EDT
[#23]
You mean his ass is falling out his ass?! 
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Posted: 1/15/2006 4:02:04 AM EDT
[#24]
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Posted: 1/15/2006 5:08:13 AM EDT
[#25]
Rectal prolapse is that that like when you shit yourself sort of?
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Posted: 1/15/2006 5:10:49 AM EDT
[#26]
On second thought there is nothing pro at all about that. Any time you start shitting your own guts I would think you should be considered as amature status.
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Posted: 1/15/2006 5:56:16 AM EDT
[#27]
I had the 'roid surgery about four years ago. Mine were pretty much up inside. Doc said they are pretty common actually. The surgery was done in the hospital. My colorectal surgeon is reputed to be the best on the Eastern Seaboard. He had the anestheiologist give me an epidural anesthetic. It caused everything below my navel to go completely dead for about two hours. I also had some other stuff to make me sleepy plus some Versed so I wouldn't remember anything.
The last thing I remember was being placed on a folding table in the OR on my stomach with my rear in the air, then I drifted off to sleep. I then woke up in recovery about 45 minutes later. I recovered quickly and they released me just as the epidural began to wear off. My missus drove me home...about sixty miles. About ten minutes into the ride, my ass began hurting very badly and I couldn't find any position comfortable. I was in real agony when we got home. It got so bad my missus called the surgeon's office...and they told her that I should get into the shower or the bath and remove the "bandage". I showered up and removed it...very carefully. It was painful. I was careful to eat the right foods after the operation to ensure easy BMs...but it still hurt like hell for a few days. Lessons learned...take care of your GI tract like you would any other part of your body. I've had other GI surgery and I can assure you, like that old story about which part runs the body? It really is your ass hole! 
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Posted: 1/15/2006 7:10:28 AM EDT
[#28]
 Fuck that |
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Posted: 1/15/2006 7:15:57 AM EDT
[#29]
probably from his boyfriend fisting him too much
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Posted: 1/15/2006 7:22:33 AM EDT
[#30]
Fissures aren't any fun either.
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Posted: 1/15/2006 8:03:14 AM EDT
[#31]
My dad had his roids lanced on two different occasions.
He said that the intense pain of lancing them was worth the almost immediate relief of the throbing, burning misery of a two-month long hemmorhoid flair up. Dad's Dr. says the shit that comes out looks like alfalfa sprouts that you get on a salad bar. |
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Posted: 1/15/2006 8:43:42 AM EDT
[#32]
How do we keep the starfish healthy
 I don't like the idea of a big hairy guy, rubber gloves, and a knife near my derriere at some future point in time.
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Posted: 1/15/2006 8:55:26 AM EDT
[#33]
Speaking from experience  Bomber |
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Posted: 1/15/2006 9:03:01 AM EDT
[#34]
Pateint:''Doctor is that a hemi?
Doctor firing up drill motor:''Your fix'in to find out''!!! 
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Posted: 1/15/2006 9:04:10 AM EDT
[#35]
Yes, it is.
About 10x the pain of the problem (roids or fissure), but the relief after 1 week is worth it. It is trying to live past the first week after surgery and sitting in a bathtub for 20 minutes every time you take a dump that is painful and sucks.
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Posted: 1/15/2006 9:08:54 AM EDT
[#36]
locked - IM inbound, AR_Clint
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Posted: 1/15/2006 9:11:08 AM EDT
[#37]
Edits Made. :)
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Posted: 1/15/2006 10:00:25 AM EDT
[#38]
That's the funniest thing I've seen in a long time. |
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Posted: 1/15/2006 10:24:52 AM EDT
[#39]
I had a hemorroidectomy with proctoplasty for internal and external hemorroids last year. The only real pain was when having a bowel movment. A quick and helpful tip is to use a combination of warm water and epson salt solution to rinse the anus after the bowel movement. This will wash away the bile salts in the feces from some of the wound and decrease the pain. I had a bowl with an asepto (like a small turkey baster) by the toilet. It really helps.
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Posted: 1/15/2006 11:29:19 AM EDT
[#40]
yes.. the prolapse is a nasty deal.. I think it's considered an ulcer if I'm not mistaken Here is one on a sheep... poor thing :( www.pipevet.com/photos/rectal_prolapse.htm |
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Posted: 1/15/2006 2:58:24 PM EDT
[#41]
+1 This guy knows what he's talking about. The initial shot(s) are the worst... think about where they have to put it. I remember being reduced to a whimpering coward... the doctor kept saying "what's wrong?"  Mine weren't stitched, BTW; they were cauterized with some sort of soldering iron type of thing. It is a relief to have them gone, though. After it's healed, expect to have less control of your schphincter (sp?) muscle. You'll need to re-learn how to control it again, but it'll be OK. Rather than getting cut on, try this quick fix: Get some good Hydrocortizone cream and keep it on there... cover it with Witch Hazel pads for comfort (optional), and it's possible that you'll be OK in a day or two.
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Posted: 1/15/2006 3:47:32 PM EDT
[#42]
Gonna depend alot on how bad you let it get before you went to the doc.
Talk to the doc about what you can do to keep them from coming back, you don't want to have one cut off and then have to go back a couple days later with another. The drugs will keep it from hurting, mostly. You can pretty much forget about doing anything but laying facedown for the next 24 hours. Do not, I repeat do not let the drugs wear off. |
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Posted: 1/15/2006 4:28:45 PM EDT
[#43]
I've taken care of these post ops for years. Most painful thing besides kidney stones. Really.
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Posted: 1/15/2006 4:31:09 PM EDT
[#44]
lots of fiber. lots and lots of it.
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Posted: 1/15/2006 4:31:17 PM EDT
[#45]
Will it hurt?
....Some guy is going to stick a knife up your ass, think about that....
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Posted: 1/15/2006 4:58:16 PM EDT
[#46]
1. Drink lots of water 2. Eat lots of leafy greens 3. Drink fruit juices with pulp 4. If you are overweight, try to get back down to fighting trim 5. Don't sit for a long time doing your biz while reading War and Peace and finally... 6. Make SURE you don't push hard!
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Posted: 1/15/2006 5:10:09 PM EDT
[#47]
This is what happens whne you try to make hmaburger from ground beef
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Posted: 1/15/2006 5:35:17 PM EDT
[#48]
I had the surgery about 7yrs ago...Used to get very painful 'roids as a result of alot of straining with alot of heavy workouts...they would bleed and hurt something awful and usually last for a few weeks before they would subside then would come back again...i cant stress how unbearable the pain would be. finally my doc said enough is enough and scheduled surgery for me. it was outpatient..they put me out completely and when I woke up i could barely walk..had to stay in bed for a few days and i had some stiches (cant remmber how many)...I took alot of painkillers to dull things and keep me asleep so I woudlnt eat (was scared to death to take a dump..)luckily the p/killers made me constipated for a few days so I didnt have to take a dump. When I did it was no ordeal and didnt hurt much...my ass was very tender for a few days but everything was great afterwards. THEY DO COME BACK THOUGH!! but thats more then likely due to the heavy weights again and the straining....
well worth it though for the years of comfort edit to add they were outside and i had a few fissures inside which the doc said were long and deep.. plus i did have the outter one lanced one day at the ER, blood spurted on the wall...nasty nasty |
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Posted: 1/17/2006 12:47:24 AM EDT
[#49]
TMI. On the note of Fissures, it is not uncommon to have 2-4 ounces or more of liquid (ehh, "pus"), stretching out the most sensitive area of your entire body, like a golf ball under the skin... I would imagine many PSI, never tested with a tire gauge though... Get them taken care of, then eat right, walk alot, and try to stay active! Also, don't strain yourself lifting/etc, which causes the blood vessels to swell, which could trigger a fissure... To avoid the prolapse, avoid anal sex. You need to be doing some SERIOUSLY wrong things to wind up with a prolpased rectum before you are in enough pain to see a doc... |
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