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Posted: 6/15/2009 6:52:43 PM EST
[Last Edit: 6/15/2009 6:55:33 PM EST by HoustonHusker]
I'd like to hear what everyone has to say regarding the problem that Iran presents to the world. Just how would you handle the issue?

HH

ETA: One of my best buddy's from Tehran––Shiite, and has family in Tehran. Nuking them from earth really isn't an option in my mind, but dealing with the mullahs and their spokesman is, of course, problematic.

Give your best estimate.

HH
Link Posted: 6/15/2009 6:55:01 PM EST
I would use the CIA to foment internal dissension and an overthrow of Iran's current rulers.
Link Posted: 6/15/2009 6:55:05 PM EST
[Last Edit: 6/15/2009 6:55:25 PM EST by DK-Prof]
Link Posted: 6/15/2009 6:56:06 PM EST


Nah, just kidding, thats above my pay scale.
Link Posted: 6/15/2009 6:58:30 PM EST
Originally Posted By bstonemega:
http://emmaline2.homestead.com/files/nuke4.jpg

Nah, just kidding, thats above my pay scale.


I knew you were kidding, but I'm looking for doable, workable solutions like DK posted.

HH
Link Posted: 6/15/2009 7:01:59 PM EST
Shower them with western culture. Smuggle in makeup through Iraq and Afghanistan. Music and tawdry magazines. Radios with plenty of radio stations in the neighboring countries.

Link Posted: 6/15/2009 7:03:16 PM EST
Originally Posted By autumnsong:
I would use the CIA to foment internal dissension and an overthrow of Iran's current rulers.


Yeah! I like that one ... keep supplying the underground movement.

Give the students iPods of Obama's speeches ... wait WUT???
Link Posted: 6/15/2009 7:05:15 PM EST
[Last Edit: 6/15/2009 7:08:13 PM EST by machinisttx]
Originally Posted By HoustonHusker:
Originally Posted By bstonemega:
http://emmaline2.homestead.com/files/nuke4.jpg

Nah, just kidding, thats above my pay scale.


I knew you were kidding, but I'm looking for doable, workable solutions like DK posted.

HH


DK's solution is the best possible...except possibly for the "cut a deal" part.

Don't just sever the major trading lines though, cut them ALL. Starve them of all foreign commerce. Destroy the economy, and you'll destroy the government.

ETA: just finished reading it... Negotiate with Iran? If you have to negotiate, you haven't weakened them sufficiently.
Link Posted: 6/15/2009 7:05:17 PM EST
[Last Edit: 6/15/2009 7:05:47 PM EST by Pegasus6]
Originally Posted By Keith_J:
Shower them with western culture. Smuggle in makeup through Iraq and Afghanistan. Music and tawdry magazines. Radios with plenty of radio stations in the neighboring countries.



This. Their young generation is going to start wanting what democracy has given the rest of the world
Link Posted: 6/15/2009 7:07:50 PM EST
Originally Posted By Keith_J:
Shower them with western culture. Smuggle in makeup through Iraq and Afghanistan. Music and tawdry magazines. Radios with plenty of radio stations in the neighboring countries.



According to my buddy, many already love western culture....not sure that would really work now.

HH
Link Posted: 6/15/2009 7:08:43 PM EST
Originally Posted By DK-Prof:
I would cut a deal (whatever it takes) with the Russians, Chinese and French/Germans to TOTALLY freeze Iran out of all the markets they want access to, and to cripple them. Once the mullahs realize just how pissed off the younger generation in Iran is getting at their shenanigans and the consequences, then they'd be willing to negotiate seriously.



That's really the only rational alternative.

The ways we would have handled them in the past is have the CIA channel funding and train internal opposition groups, hopefully encourage violent action and possible assassinations. But I don't think that would even work here, they have plenty of religious nutjobs to take the place of anyone successfully assassinated. Besides killing the SOB's would make them martyrs.

I guess we could re-task some ICBM's to cover Iran. Make a big deal out of it, invite the press. Send Iran a welcome letter to the nuclear club and remind them of the consequences our half century head start might give us if they ever try to use them...hell it worked against the USSR. If we get desperate, we might allow Israel to try to take out some of their nuclear sights. However, that'd be difficult, Israel would have to over fly a few Muslim countries. We could always try surgical strikes, but even if we were successful that'd help bolster support for Iran among the Muslim Masses.

No, I hate to say it but your option is the only that makes sense.
Link Posted: 6/15/2009 7:11:07 PM EST
Well...mines not doable. But, I'm inclined to sweep the airspace; then airdrop around 2 million M16s along with a few thousand AT4s and such for the protestors. But then, Iran has been on my S-list since we found out where those improved IEDs have been coming from.
Link Posted: 6/15/2009 7:14:34 PM EST
"Bullets change nations far more surer than votes do."

I would give the protestors, WP grenades and glocks. lots and lots of glocks. (they can get what they need from their oppressors after that)

and then to insure they became an ally I would as Keith_J said, smother the fuck out of them with western culture.
Link Posted: 6/15/2009 7:16:12 PM EST
Originally Posted By DK-Prof:
I would cut a deal (whatever it takes) with the Russians, Chinese and French/Germans to TOTALLY freeze Iran out of all the markets they want access to, and to cripple them. Once the mullahs realize just how pissed off the younger generation in Iran is getting at their shenanigans and the consequences, then they'd be willing to negotiate seriously.



You are making the assumption that the Russians and Chinese share our interests. They do not.

Iran's support of trouble in Iraq continues to weaken the US. Couple that with Obozo unilaterally disarming and wrecking the economy at home, and you have a recipe for China & Russia to emerge as the dominant powers from the rubble of a crushed US. What incentive do they have to mess with this? What could we offer them to do so (answer: NOTHING)
Link Posted: 6/15/2009 7:17:22 PM EST
I'd airdrop Opra, Jimmy Carter, Letterman, the SNL cast, and Cindy Sheehan into Tehran, and hope for the best
Link Posted: 6/15/2009 7:17:24 PM EST
Originally Posted By bstonemega:


Nah, just kidding, thats above my pay scale.


That's just what I was going to post. You beat me to it.

Link Posted: 6/15/2009 7:18:07 PM EST
Originally Posted By Keith_J:
Shower them with western culture. Smuggle in makeup through Iraq and Afghanistan. Music and tawdry magazines. Radios with plenty of radio stations in the neighboring countries.




they already have all that stuff. They are HIGH TECH. Havent you noticed how done up the women are? Persian women are some of the most beautiful. I should know....
Link Posted: 6/15/2009 7:18:19 PM EST
Non-persistent bio-toxins delivered by B-2, depopulate wholesale, roll in and claim the oil infrastructure.
Link Posted: 6/15/2009 7:20:03 PM EST
Originally Posted By beatjunglist:
Originally Posted By Keith_J:
Shower them with western culture. Smuggle in makeup through Iraq and Afghanistan. Music and tawdry magazines. Radios with plenty of radio stations in the neighboring countries.




they already have all that stuff. They are HIGH TECH. Havent you noticed how done up the women are? Persian women are some of the most beautiful. I should know....


You oughta see Farhad's wife....

She is drop-dead gorgeous.

HH
Link Posted: 6/15/2009 7:21:33 PM EST
Originally Posted By ManBearPig:
Originally Posted By bstonemega:
http://emmaline2.homestead.com/files/nuke4.jpg

Nah, just kidding, thats above my pay scale.


That's just what I was going to post. You beat me to it.



72 hours ago I would have agreed with this.

But I'm not so sure now that I've seen how outraged these people are about Ahmedenjahistanokapi winning.

However if we were to take military action I would definitely support dropping in the Rangers and SF to "pacify" the would be evil regime, and all those associated with and supporting it.
Link Posted: 6/15/2009 7:22:24 PM EST
i'd find all the anti-ahmadinejad groups inside iran who are willing to fight and give them all the required materials to make IEDs. return the favor for iran's involvement with the iraqi insurgency. sweet justice.
Link Posted: 6/15/2009 7:22:49 PM EST
Originally Posted By Armed_Scientist:
Non-persistent bio-toxins delivered by B-2, depopulate wholesale, roll in and claim the oil infrastructure.


So you are willing to kill everyone there? That will make us look really good. These types of comments give Americans a bad name. So admit you were joking.

Link Posted: 6/15/2009 7:22:54 PM EST
Bombs. A whole bunch of bombs. For quite a long time. Til the bombs ran out.

Thank you for asking.
Link Posted: 6/15/2009 7:25:00 PM EST
Originally Posted By scottfire1957:
Bombs. A whole bunch of bombs. For quite a long time. Til the bombs ran out.

Thank you for asking.


What are you, twelve?
Link Posted: 6/15/2009 7:26:07 PM EST
Originally Posted By TheBernice:
i'd find all the anti-ahmadinejad groups inside iran who are willing to fight and give them all the required materials to make IEDs. return the favor for iran's involvement with the iraqi insurgency. sweet justice.


yep.

Payback times x100
Link Posted: 6/15/2009 7:27:38 PM EST
Originally Posted By scottfire1957:
Bombs. A whole bunch of bombs. For quite a long time. Til the bombs ran out.

Thank you for asking.


...just where would you drop the bombs?

HH
Link Posted: 6/15/2009 7:29:39 PM EST
Originally Posted By beatjunglist:
Originally Posted By Armed_Scientist:
Non-persistent bio-toxins delivered by B-2, depopulate wholesale, roll in and claim the oil infrastructure.


So you are willing to kill everyone there? That will make us look really good. These types of comments give Americans a bad name. So admit you were joking.



If the goal was to obtain the cheapest oil possible, he'd have a winning plan.
Link Posted: 6/15/2009 7:29:49 PM EST
[Last Edit: 6/15/2009 7:30:30 PM EST by beatjunglist]
Originally Posted By HoustonHusker:
Originally Posted By scottfire1957:
Bombs. A whole bunch of bombs. For quite a long time. Til the bombs ran out.

Thank you for asking.


...just where would you drop the bombs?

HH


I dont think he cares -because it just sounds so cool to say "Bomb'em"

So with his logic, if TX decides to leave the Union then we can just drop bombs until Houston, Dallas and the rest of little Mexico is gone... Heck, They have oil too.

Link Posted: 6/15/2009 7:30:17 PM EST
Originally Posted By HoustonHusker:
Originally Posted By scottfire1957:
Bombs. A whole bunch of bombs. For quite a long time. Til the bombs ran out.

Thank you for asking.


...just where would you drop the bombs?

HH


Government structures?
Link Posted: 6/15/2009 7:30:59 PM EST
DK_Prof pretty well nailed it. The one thing I would add to it is asking the Israelis not to do anything too provocative for the time being. An attack by outsiders would allow Ahmadinejad to say "I told you so!" and rally some of the opposition back to his side. If that's done then, yeah, try to keep the Russians at bay while using the CIA to covertly funnel as much logistical and small arms support to the opposition as possible. Then if it looks like the theocracy is starting to tumble stand ready to help whatever emerges after them.

On a personal level I wouldn't mind us walking a few IEDs in to their country and blowing up some of the IRG. Aside from the aide it would give to the resistance, paybacks are a bitch.
Link Posted: 6/15/2009 7:31:57 PM EST
Originally Posted By beatjunglist:
Originally Posted By HoustonHusker:
Originally Posted By scottfire1957:
Bombs. A whole bunch of bombs. For quite a long time. Til the bombs ran out.

Thank you for asking.


...just where would you drop the bombs?

HH


I dont think he cares -because it just sounds so cool to say "Bomb'em"

So with his logic, if TX decides to leave the Union then we can just drop bombs until Houston, Dallas and the rest of little Mexico is gone... Heck, They have oil too.



That might work...if military aircraft wasn't manufactured/serviced/updated/etc. here.
Link Posted: 6/15/2009 7:33:22 PM EST
Originally Posted By FlawlessCowboy:
DK_Prof pretty well nailed it. The one thing I would add to it is asking the Israelis not to do anything too provocative for the time being. An attack by outsiders would allow Ahmadinejad to say "I told you so!" and rally some of the opposition back to his side. If that's done then, yeah, try to keep the Russians at bay while using the CIA to covertly funnel as much logistical and small arms support to the opposition as possible. Then if it looks like the theocracy is starting to tumble stand ready to help whatever emerges after them.

On a personal level I wouldn't mind us walking a few IEDs in to their country and blowing up some of the IRG. Aside from the aide it would give to the resistance, paybacks are a bitch.


Yeah, we need somewhere else to throw taxpayer dollars.
Link Posted: 6/15/2009 7:34:17 PM EST
De-Stablize there country through subersion and covert action, with recent events it might not take much. If there more worried about brutally oppressing there own people there less likely to be fucking around with the rest of the middle east, pump weapons and bomb making material into the hands of the dissidents within there country, Attempt to effect a regime change and try to ensure the next one is at least apathetic to the west if not in favor of the west.

I don't think dealing with China or Russia will be very successfull as the're interests and ours don't nescesarily align.


If none of the above options were on the tablel, I do think that publicly announcing we had re-tasked several ICBM strike packages to cover Iran would give them a moment of pause, especially if we made it abundantly clear that we were holding them responsible for the actions of known terror groups that they support and supply outside of there country, and that said strike package would be utilized in the event of a WMD event tied to any of those groups even if it didn't originate from there country. That might serve as a moment of pause for there leaders.
Link Posted: 6/15/2009 7:35:43 PM EST
Originally Posted By machinisttx:
Originally Posted By FlawlessCowboy:
DK_Prof pretty well nailed it. The one thing I would add to it is asking the Israelis not to do anything too provocative for the time being. An attack by outsiders would allow Ahmadinejad to say "I told you so!" and rally some of the opposition back to his side. If that's done then, yeah, try to keep the Russians at bay while using the CIA to covertly funnel as much logistical and small arms support to the opposition as possible. Then if it looks like the theocracy is starting to tumble stand ready to help whatever emerges after them.

On a personal level I wouldn't mind us walking a few IEDs in to their country and blowing up some of the IRG. Aside from the aide it would give to the resistance, paybacks are a bitch.


Yeah, we need somewhere else to throw taxpayer dollars.


Without the Iranian government backing what's left of the Iraqi insurgency we could dial down our forces there and save a bunch of money.
Link Posted: 6/15/2009 7:37:48 PM EST
CIA operatives building organizations within Iran and flood the fucking country with M16s and hand grenades. If the rioting crowd had guns then this problem would be over.
Link Posted: 6/15/2009 7:38:53 PM EST
Originally Posted By FlawlessCowboy:
Originally Posted By machinisttx:
Originally Posted By FlawlessCowboy:
DK_Prof pretty well nailed it. The one thing I would add to it is asking the Israelis not to do anything too provocative for the time being. An attack by outsiders would allow Ahmadinejad to say "I told you so!" and rally some of the opposition back to his side. If that's done then, yeah, try to keep the Russians at bay while using the CIA to covertly funnel as much logistical and small arms support to the opposition as possible. Then if it looks like the theocracy is starting to tumble stand ready to help whatever emerges after them.

On a personal level I wouldn't mind us walking a few IEDs in to their country and blowing up some of the IRG. Aside from the aide it would give to the resistance, paybacks are a bitch.


Yeah, we need somewhere else to throw taxpayer dollars.


Without the Iranian government backing what's left of the Iraqi insurgency we could dial down our forces there and save a bunch of money.


Without any foreign commerce, the iranian government has no income. At most, it would cost us a couple of U.S. Navy ships patrolling the shipping channels to deny access.
Link Posted: 6/15/2009 7:40:10 PM EST
With 3 hours sleep and a long day under my belt, right now I'd say, "Fuck all y'all, I'm goin' to bed."

In the morning, I would awaken with a master plan.
Link Posted: 6/15/2009 7:40:21 PM EST
[Last Edit: 6/15/2009 7:41:49 PM EST by beatjunglist]
I have to get the link but a year or so ago an Iranian American citizen was caught trying to shipp several thousand UZIs out of LA. The guns were intended for resisting the regime. The FBI arrested him and he is in jail. The FBI should have asked him what else he needed and hooked him up with some CIA help.
Link Posted: 6/15/2009 7:41:09 PM EST
Originally Posted By machinisttx:
Originally Posted By beatjunglist:
Originally Posted By Armed_Scientist:
Non-persistent bio-toxins delivered by B-2, depopulate wholesale, roll in and claim the oil infrastructure.


So you are willing to kill everyone there? That will make us look really good. These types of comments give Americans a bad name. So admit you were joking.



If the goal was to obtain the cheapest oil possible, he'd have a winning plan.


Neutron Bombs were invented for a reason
Link Posted: 6/15/2009 7:41:19 PM EST
I have an axe to grind with Iran.

I would fully back Israel in any endevour they chose with regard to Iran.

Iran has been a thorn in our side since 1979, they have repeatedly encouraged terrorist and extreme acts against the US.

The have supplied arms to insurgants in Iraq as well as infultrated their own Spec-Ops groups into Iraq to train insurgants as well as carry out attacks against US servicemen, in Iraq.

Iran has in my mind committed repeated acts of war against the US in Iraq. If I were the president of the US, I would be gathering all the information and evidence I could about Iran's involvement in Iraq and use it as an excuse to carry out and extended bombing campaign on Iran, while I allowed the newly formed Iraqi and Kurdish governments to carve up Iran as I saw fit.

Link Posted: 6/15/2009 7:42:39 PM EST
I'd write them a strongly worded letter and threaten economic sanctions.
Link Posted: 6/15/2009 7:42:51 PM EST
You guys are doing this all wrong.

Get the CIA and .FED together. .FED prints trillions of dollars in counterfeit Iranian currency. We use this to pay off our debts and send the Iranians into super high inflation while the CIA implants the tools needed to make a revolution happen.

Kill 2 birds with one stone.
Link Posted: 6/15/2009 7:42:54 PM EST
Originally Posted By Frost7:
With 3 hours sleep and a long day under my belt, right now I'd say, "Fuck all y'all, I'm goin' to bed."

In the morning, I would awaken with a master plan.


Get some sleep then weigh in.



HH
Link Posted: 6/15/2009 7:44:57 PM EST
Smuggle in capitalist propaganda as well as other american goods that tout liberty and freedom and let the students do the rest.

Link Posted: 6/15/2009 7:46:44 PM EST
I would just ignore them, same with North Korea if they decide to use nuclear weapons, then destroy their whole country! The whole bunch of them is not worth one American life!
Link Posted: 6/15/2009 7:48:06 PM EST
Originally Posted By beatjunglist:
Originally Posted By scottfire1957:
Bombs. A whole bunch of bombs. For quite a long time. Til the bombs ran out.

Thank you for asking.


What are you, twelve?


Actually, I'm 10 and a half.

I'd call you a dumbass, but I might get a timeout, so I won't. If you can't see humor/sarcasm/ whatever, Then that's what I'd call you.

Link Posted: 6/15/2009 7:50:41 PM EST
I would let Israel protect themselves .And deal with the consequences as they come up .
Link Posted: 6/15/2009 7:51:48 PM EST
Originally Posted By machinisttx:
Originally Posted By FlawlessCowboy:
Originally Posted By machinisttx:
Originally Posted By FlawlessCowboy:
DK_Prof pretty well nailed it. The one thing I would add to it is asking the Israelis not to do anything too provocative for the time being. An attack by outsiders would allow Ahmadinejad to say "I told you so!" and rally some of the opposition back to his side. If that's done then, yeah, try to keep the Russians at bay while using the CIA to covertly funnel as much logistical and small arms support to the opposition as possible. Then if it looks like the theocracy is starting to tumble stand ready to help whatever emerges after them.

On a personal level I wouldn't mind us walking a few IEDs in to their country and blowing up some of the IRG. Aside from the aide it would give to the resistance, paybacks are a bitch.


Yeah, we need somewhere else to throw taxpayer dollars.


Without the Iranian government backing what's left of the Iraqi insurgency we could dial down our forces there and save a bunch of money.


Without any foreign commerce, the iranian government has no income. At most, it would cost us a couple of U.S. Navy ships patrolling the shipping channels to deny access.


Then it comes down to whether it's cheaper to fund the opposition of to patrol the ports. I don't know enough about the relative costs to make that call though both ideas have merit.

I think cooperation with the opposition is more viable at the moment because of the current situation on the ground in Iran. In all likelihood the CIA's been active inside Iran for years (if they can sneak across the Iraqi border then we should be able to, too) and has been awaiting an opportunity like this. If so then I think we ought to go for it. If not then your plan seems good. Stop the inflow of refined petroleum products and let them squirm.
Link Posted: 6/15/2009 7:54:02 PM EST
Originally Posted By scottfire1957:
Originally Posted By beatjunglist:
Originally Posted By scottfire1957:
Bombs. A whole bunch of bombs. For quite a long time. Til the bombs ran out.

Thank you for asking.


What are you, twelve?


Actually, I'm 10 and a half.

I'd call you a dumbass, but I might get a timeout, so I won't. If you can't see humor/sarcasm/ whatever, Then that's what I'd call you.



Scott, the sarcasm wasn't that easy to see...just saying. It's hard to detect some sarcasm without the use of icons.

Just sayin...

HH
Link Posted: 6/15/2009 7:55:07 PM EST
This is an extremely difficult question to come up with a good answer to.

Most Iranians are fairly pro-western, but they are still pretty paranoid about foreign intervention/influence. Of course, some of the younger Iranians might be less inclined to refuse assistance from us, but it still presents a tricky situation.

I tend to agree with DK's comments, but unfortunately I don't see Russia or especially China playing ball. China is very reliant on Iran's oil/natural gas, and unless they thought they would get a better deal quickly, I don't think we could provide the incentive.

It would be unfortunate to not assist the Iranian opposition and be able to take advantage of this situation, but an overplayed hand could backfire easily. Sorry I didn't have any good ideas to add. Hopefully I contributed positively to the discussion though.

In a semi related note, I wonder what the Mujahedeen e-Khalq (hybrid Marxist/Islamist Iranian opposition group) is doing? I know the U.S. wants them out of Iraq (where they are in exile). It sounds like a really horrible combination, but they are reportedly still partially armed, and would theoretically be willing to attack government forces in Iran.
Link Posted: 6/15/2009 7:56:03 PM EST
Nuke em till their shadows glow
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