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Posted: 9/8/2004 6:17:30 PM EDT
[#1]
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Posted: 9/8/2004 6:17:40 PM EDT
[#2]
The Shriners Hospital is a good charity notwithstanding what you might think about masons.
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Posted: 9/8/2004 6:18:03 PM EDT
[#3]
One way, First Class, window seat. Yup, you're on your way.
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Posted: 9/8/2004 6:19:13 PM EDT
[#4]
Sorry. Doomed. Now, if it was a salesman, or some stupid Kerry supporter, that's one thing. A simple, "Sorry, I can't donate anything right now. >click<" would have sufficed.
IIRC, the Shrine doesn't pay people to do their "telemarketing." They're volunteers. ETA: Clicked the second choice. I couldn't pick more than one! Oh, and I've also applied to the Shrine. 
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Posted: 9/8/2004 6:21:08 PM EDT
[#5]
try this one, "huh, WHAT WHAT, I CAN"T HEAR YOU, then tell them you have to find your hearing aid. One lady waited for like 5 minutes.
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Posted: 9/8/2004 6:23:28 PM EDT
[#6]
Then when I go to sleep tonight, I will stuff marshmallows in my pockets. Yikes...  TRG |
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Posted: 9/8/2004 6:26:05 PM EDT
[#7]
When you get burned in hell dont ask the Shriners for help.
You're too old. |
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Posted: 9/8/2004 6:28:16 PM EDT
[#8]
I give telemarketers one chance. If they persist after I say no, then I break out the "FCC rule book" wherein I state (truthfully) that Arkansas is a "No Rebuttal State" and that he/she is violating FCC rules. I then tell them that if the manager did not inform them of this, that they should tell the manager about it because the FCC doesnt play around.
The acronymn "FCC" usually elicits that "OH SHIT" pause. Its great. And its great because I was a telemarketer. I was one of those Discover Card bastards calling from West Teleservices, otherwise known as the left pinky toe of Satan. |
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Posted: 9/8/2004 6:28:53 PM EDT
[#9]
I'll pay your penance for you tomorrow.
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Posted: 9/8/2004 6:29:45 PM EDT
[#10]
You are mean and probably hurt someone's feelings
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Posted: 9/8/2004 6:29:49 PM EDT
[#11]
Yeah, you're a fuckwad. Drive some of this crippled kids and burn victims back and forth to a hospital for their treatment and maybe you won't think its so funny. I have the honor of driving the shuttle between Albany and Springfield for the local Shriners. Those kids have more courage and integrity than you'll ever have.
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Posted: 9/8/2004 6:30:03 PM EDT
[#12]
Before I switched to wireless I used to have fun with them all the time. If a woman would call I would try to have phone sex with her. I would ask her what color panties she was wearing or ask her what makes her hot.
 They usually hang up in a hurry.
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Posted: 9/8/2004 6:32:39 PM EDT
[#13]
God will forgive you
(however the Shriners won't)  |
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Posted: 9/8/2004 6:33:51 PM EDT
[#14]
You're right I won't... Hiram "Cyprus Shrine" Ranger |
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Posted: 9/8/2004 6:34:59 PM EDT
[#15]
I usually tell the telemarketer that if they will stand up on their desk and yell as loud as they can, "I'm sick of this shit and I'm getting my gun and killing everybody in this room" I will buy their vinyl siding, credit card offer, insurance. Haven't had a taker yet.
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Posted: 9/8/2004 6:36:32 PM EDT
[#16]
I always ask for their personal phone number so I can call them back at a more convenient time.
MT |
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Posted: 9/8/2004 6:40:24 PM EDT
[#17]
Hey, the 'God' status around here is already taken.  TRG PS. If you add up the 'other choices' Ilikelegs and farm animals have me beat... ROFL |
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Posted: 9/8/2004 6:42:57 PM EDT
[#18]
  Very nice! |
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Posted: 9/8/2004 6:46:35 PM EDT
[#19]
We don't ever get telemarketers calling my house anymore. However at work, we get these stupid ass TONER PIRATES! Yes, they try and dupe you into buying their expensive laser printer cartridge by making you think they're the company you lease your printers and copiers from. They ALWAYS have some stupid ass excuse to ask for the model # of your machine like their computers crashed and they have you on the books, or records got deleted, etc. I love fucking with them. They pretty much always hang up the milisecond they realize you are on to them though.
 It's fun fucking with them while they think you're being duped though.
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Posted: 9/8/2004 7:00:43 PM EDT
[#20]
..on a bobsled .....
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Posted: 9/8/2004 7:07:51 PM EDT
[#21]
Oh yeah, you'll smoke a turd in Hell for that one!
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Posted: 9/8/2004 7:29:51 PM EDT
[#22]
I found a VERY effective way to stop telemarketers by accident a while back(and didn't really want to share it but here it goes!!!)
I had a friend calling me back that I used to get in trouble with in my youth...we used to get harassed by a certain local JBT(he really was a nice guyBTW!!!) so I answer what I thought was his return call to me... I answered in my bubba(country) voice "Officer xxx from the xxx police dept fraud department... I get the most scared"I'm really sorry well take this number off our records. Sorry" I have to admit this has cut out almost all my sales calls. |
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Posted: 9/8/2004 7:35:00 PM EDT
[#23]
My friend, you just gave yourself a front row seat to hell. Can I join?
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Posted: 9/8/2004 7:36:43 PM EDT
[#24]
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Posted: 9/8/2004 8:38:21 PM EDT
[#25]
That was harsh...
real harsh... Definately some pitchforks in your future. - BG |
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Posted: 9/8/2004 8:41:59 PM EDT
[#26]
Damn.... TRG |
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Posted: 9/8/2004 8:42:26 PM EDT
[#27]
Schriners is one of less than 5 places I give money to. They fixed my club foot when I was little. Am now 100% and it didn't cost my parents a dime.
S.O. |
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Posted: 9/9/2004 3:22:46 AM EDT
[#28]
You fucked with the Shriners, who are high-level masons.
Great. Now your credit cards will be cancelled, you'll lose your job, and you'll be pulled over constantly. That's what you get for fucking with the global masonic conspiracy!!!!! h However, it is possible that you'll smoke a turd in Hell considering all the good they do for kids. |
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Posted: 9/9/2004 3:45:37 AM EDT
[#29]
[jesse jackson] Remove yo self to the bear pit for proper chastization followed inmedeaitely by a funeralization where you will proceed direct to hell for your inappropitate comments.
[/jesse jackson]
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Posted: 9/9/2004 3:48:45 AM EDT
[#30]
The Poll has multiple yeses. Fix it so we can vote more than once!!
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Posted: 9/9/2004 6:10:32 AM EDT
[#31]
Your going to hell alright. But its because of your poll!
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Posted: 9/9/2004 6:32:29 AM EDT
[#32]
You like that, huh? Your numbers are better than mine. TRG |
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Posted: 9/9/2004 6:35:27 AM EDT
[#33]
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Posted: 9/9/2004 6:38:43 AM EDT
[#34]
I had one call, and do this when my wife is not around.
Ask them what they are wearing, ask them they're favorite sexual position etc. Thong or grannies, etc. Always fun TXL |
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Posted: 9/9/2004 6:39:59 AM EDT
[#35]
In hindsight, I should have done that. LOL TRG |
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Posted: 9/9/2004 6:44:46 AM EDT
[#36]
I fuck with every telemarketer that calls
Here's a general transcript of my script. Them: Hi can I speak with Mr NoVaGator Me: Sure...speaking. Them: I'm calling from xxxx and wanted to see if (ok...here is the critical part....as soon as they pause for a comma or a half breath, I say, in a very agitated tone: Me: ARE YOU DONE? Them: uhhhh, no. Me: Sorry, continue. Them: Blah blah blah (let them continue their whole script) after they're done, wait ....do nothing...until they say Them: hello, are you still there? Me: Sure. I'm sorry, can you repeat that. (then just loop back to step 1 - see how many times you can get them to go through it) |
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Posted: 9/9/2004 7:06:16 AM EDT
[#37]
All telemarketers are satans foot soldiers.
They should ALL be damned, rochambeaued, and slapped in the head. You done good! |
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Posted: 9/9/2004 8:33:16 AM EDT
[#38]
That's right, Girlfriend! TRG |
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Posted: 9/9/2004 8:42:40 AM EDT
[#39]
You are sooooo going to hell..... but not for that - it's only a +1.
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Posted: 9/9/2004 8:47:39 AM EDT
[#40]
The standards for you moderators must really be slipping!
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