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Posted: 2/1/2011 5:23:13 AM EDT
[#1]
In
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Posted: 2/1/2011 5:23:47 AM EDT
[#2]
4.5/10
Needs more swearing. |
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Posted: 2/1/2011 5:24:01 AM EDT
[#3]
It's the thought that counts
 I think you're being a little harsh there tiger. That's all understandable, though. |
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Posted: 2/1/2011 5:25:27 AM EDT
[#4]
IMO, "her" money and "his" money is for kids that are dating, not adults that are married.
The issue you are describing is about piss-poor communication and responsibility, not about "whose" money it is. |
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Posted: 2/1/2011 5:26:34 AM EDT
[#5]
I can see that being frustrating.
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Posted: 2/1/2011 5:26:39 AM EDT
[#6]
How did she escape the kitchen?
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Posted: 2/1/2011 5:26:47 AM EDT
[#7]
Quoted:
IMO, "her" money and "his" money is for kids that are dating, not adults that are married. The issue you are describing is about piss-poor communication and responsibility, not about "whose" money it is. This. Sounds like a problem with her not knowing well enough what would be desired/acceptable by you. |
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Posted: 2/1/2011 5:26:53 AM EDT
[#8]
Just take it back !
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Posted: 2/1/2011 5:26:59 AM EDT
[#9]
I get your point, and hope you are venting to ARF and didnt treat your wife in this manner. Simply tell her thank you, and that you would rather spind the money on something else.
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Posted: 2/1/2011 5:27:08 AM EDT
[#10]
She'll find someone to appreciate it.
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Posted: 2/1/2011 5:27:43 AM EDT
[#11]
Quoted:
In You know the rules........pics of wife or BAN. 
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Posted: 2/1/2011 5:27:54 AM EDT
[#12]
You are married therefore it's your money collectively. Don't agree then wash your own clothes, cook your own dinner, clean your own home, take care of your own children, etc in all thee free time you have from working outside the home. God bless my wife for keeping our home in order.
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Posted: 2/1/2011 5:28:35 AM EDT
[#13]
Quoted: IMO, "her" money and "his" money is for kids that are dating, not adults that are married. The issue you are describing is about piss-poor communication and responsibility, not about "whose" money it is. Got to go with this answer. |
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Posted: 2/1/2011 5:28:51 AM EDT
[#14]
Quoted:
IMO, "her" money and "his" money is for kids that are dating, not adults that are married. The issue you are describing is about piss-poor communication and responsibility, not about "whose" money it is. You are not reading it fully. I put the money in for everybody. Everybody. All decisions on 'our' money need to be joint decisions. if one person decides to unilaterally take money out to do this shit it's a slap in the face to me personally. This is a woman who has a BS in engineering and has been 'looking' for work for fucking 8 years. There's plenty of blunt communication from me on this issue I guarantee. She's either malicious or dumb as a rock. I still haven't figured out which. |
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Posted: 2/1/2011 5:30:20 AM EDT
[#15]
Tell your wife, not arfcom.
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Posted: 2/1/2011 5:31:00 AM EDT
[#16]
Quoted:
She'll find someone to appreciate it. THIS. EXACTLY. they always do..... |
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Posted: 2/1/2011 5:32:30 AM EDT
[#17]
She is projecting. She is buying you stuff that she wants you to buy her.
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Posted: 2/1/2011 5:33:05 AM EDT
[#18]
She's probably on some other board asking if she should eject from her ungrateful husband...
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Posted: 2/1/2011 5:34:36 AM EDT
[#19]
Quoted:
IMO, "her" money and "his" money is for kids that are dating, not adults that are married. The issue you are describing is about piss-poor communication and responsibility, not about "whose" money it is. This is a good way to put it. |
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Posted: 2/1/2011 5:36:33 AM EDT
[#20]
Quoted: You are married therefore it's your money collectively. Don't agree then wash your own clothes, cook your own dinner, clean your own home, take care of your own children, etc in all thee free time you have from working outside the home. God bless my wife for keeping our home in order. This... If you can't come to this realization, it's simply a matter of time before you divorce. Judging from your self-centered attitude, you would probably be better off single anyway. |
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Posted: 2/1/2011 5:36:34 AM EDT
[#21]
Quoted:
Quoted:
IMO, "her" money and "his" money is for kids that are dating, not adults that are married. The issue you are describing is about piss-poor communication and responsibility, not about "whose" money it is. You are not reading it fully. I put the money in for everybody. Everybody. All decisions on 'our' money need to be joint decisions. if one person decides to unilaterally take money out to do this shit it's a slap in the face to me personally. This is a woman who has a BS in engineering and has been 'looking' for work for fucking 8 years. There's plenty of blunt communication from me on this issue I guarantee. She's either malicious or dumb as a rock. I still haven't figured out which. If this is the way you feel about her, I'd think a divorce would be in order. Certainly, I wouldn't stay with a man for whom I had so little regard. Jane |
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Posted: 2/1/2011 5:36:42 AM EDT
[#22]
I could see that being a problem. You're screwed either way, might as well return it. |
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Posted: 2/1/2011 5:36:47 AM EDT
[#23]
Quoted:
Quoted:
IMO, "her" money and "his" money is for kids that are dating, not adults that are married. The issue you are describing is about piss-poor communication and responsibility, not about "whose" money it is. You are not reading it fully. I put the money in for everybody. Everybody. All decisions on 'our' money need to be joint decisions. if one person decides to unilaterally take money out to do this shit it's a slap in the face to me personally. This is a woman who has a BS in engineering and has been 'looking' for work for fucking 8 years. There's plenty of blunt communication from me on this issue I guarantee. She's either malicious or dumb as a rock. I still haven't figured out which. Yep; you're an engineer all right. 
Good luck with your domestic situation. Sell the ring next time you want a toy and take the wife out to dinner as an apology. Think how you'll feel if she buys toys for some other guy instead of you. |
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Posted: 2/1/2011 5:36:48 AM EDT
[#24]
Just buy her a new AR, or her very own ammo fort for valentines day.
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Posted: 2/1/2011 5:37:28 AM EDT
[#25]
It's your fault for not telling her in a way that she remembers. Marrying a slow learner is a commitment to spend more time teaching and communicating and resorting to creative training methods.
If being direct and forceful isn't working, maybe you could feign an interest in hand crafted sentimental cards. You'll have to ooh and aww over her handiwork, but it will save you money and frustration and make her feel special and useful. 
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Posted: 2/1/2011 5:37:44 AM EDT
[#26]
Divorce thread in a year when she finds someone else who doesn't sound like her master.
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Posted: 2/1/2011 5:39:43 AM EDT
[#27]
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Posted: 2/1/2011 5:40:14 AM EDT
[#28]
Poor guy.
You have a wife who buys you gifts. You have a wife who thinks about you enough to buy you gifts. You have a wife. Lots don't. |
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Posted: 2/1/2011 5:42:05 AM EDT
[#29]
Quoted:
Divorce thread in a year when she finds someone else who doesn't sound like her master. Damn, beat me. |
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Posted: 2/1/2011 5:43:34 AM EDT
[#30]
I understand where your coming from with finances being tight and in a lot of cases non existent, but you need to appreciate her for trying to put a smile on your face. I can also agree with maybe she spent a bit more on a gift than necessary but hell I cant get my wife to let me spend $100 on some shit and we both watch the money - so if shes dropping that much coin on you its either 1) she has some type of spending issue, or big taste and little budget - which is something you guys need to work out or eject or 2) she just thinks your worth it - which is pretty priceless imho
remember one thing - money aint gonna be the issue on your last breath...... |
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Posted: 2/1/2011 5:45:14 AM EDT
[#31]
Quoted:
Quoted:
IMO, "her" money and "his" money is for kids that are dating, not adults that are married. The issue you are describing is about piss-poor communication and responsibility, not about "whose" money it is. Got to go with this answer. Disagree, the Wife and I split up the bills, mortgage etc twice a month. We have no financial stress and both of us work outside of the home. We also split up the chores. Dont know, works for us. |
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Posted: 2/1/2011 5:46:55 AM EDT
[#32]
How dare you not appreciate the metal loop with rocks attached. That's an insult, sir.
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Posted: 2/1/2011 5:47:34 AM EDT
[#33]
Tread lightly on this one OP, there's much danger ahead with the wife.
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Posted: 2/1/2011 5:47:54 AM EDT
[#34]
Quoted:
Quoted:
She'll find someone to appreciate it. THIS. EXACTLY. they always do..... Appreciate...what exactly? A woman who spends large sums of family money on unwanted, pointless shit? I've never met a guy looking for that. Considerate? Sure. Loving? Great. Repetitively stupid spending habbits? Not so much. |
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Posted: 2/1/2011 5:48:55 AM EDT
[#35]
Well good for you guys.
More background: After looking around for years and dating supermodel type chicks, etc. and the usual array of single moms, I decided that I wanted a working woman rather than another mouth to feed. This after losing 250k (effectively my retirement and kids college fund) in divorce #1. So I found a gal working as a tech writer and made a deal. We both work for three years and then you can do anything you want. This way I do the heavy financial lifting and we end up with a paid off house and retirement fund. Now coast for 20 years. NO. she loses her job after 6 months and tries this and that, etc. all the while I'm supporting now.....drum roll....another mouth. Great. I've had counselors get in her face and ask why any adult would think they can do this. I've had apologies from her, but still.....no work. Now after 10 years, I have no hope of retirement because she has been nothing but a financial drain. Damn. On the flip side in every way, she's a good companion, sex is good, she's fairly good looking (former lingerie model), a great cook. But damn. I can't afford to fix my truck or buy my kids the things I would like them to have. But I've supplied her with a car, a nice car. And I get the evil eye if I buy a freakin usb cable for my kid's computer. But she can buy me a damned $1200 ring. WTF? |
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Posted: 2/1/2011 5:51:01 AM EDT
[#36]
Issues............ you two have 'em and it goes beyond money.
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Posted: 2/1/2011 5:52:27 AM EDT
[#37]
I would thank her and then explain that, although I appreciate her thinking of me, I would never wear it as it's a little too fancy for me. I would suggest that we return it for a less fancy gift... even if that turned out to be more jewelry. The joy she feels in giving me something like that is worth what it costs me.
Or, watch her leave you for someone that "understands" her. Your choice.
Quoted:
You are not reading it fully. I put the money in for everybody. Everybody. All decisions on 'our' money need to be joint decisions. if one person decides to unilaterally take money out to do this shit it's a slap in the face to me personally. This is a woman who has a BS in engineering and has been 'looking' for work for fucking 8 years. There's plenty of blunt communication from me on this issue I guarantee. She's either malicious or dumb as a rock. I still haven't figured out which. If that ship hasn't already sailed.
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Posted: 2/1/2011 5:53:26 AM EDT
[#38]
Quoted:
Well good for you guys. More background: After looking around for years and dating supermodel type chicks, etc. and the usual array of single moms, I decided that I wanted a working woman rather than another mouth to feed. This after losing 250k (effectively my retirement and kids college fund) in divorce #1. So I found a gal working as a tech writer and made a deal. We both work for three years and then you can do anything you want. This way I do the heavy financial lifting and we end up with a paid off house and retirement fund. Now coast for 20 years. NO. she loses her job after 6 months and tries this and that, etc. all the while I'm supporting now.....drum roll....another mouth. Great. I've had counselors get in her face and ask why any adult would think they can do this. I've had apologies from her, but still.....no work. Now after 10 years, I have no hope of retirement because she has been nothing but a financial drain. Damn. On the flip side in every way, she's a good companion, sex is good, she's fairly good looking (former lingerie model), a great cook. But damn. I can't afford to fix my truck or buy my kids the things I would like them to have. But I've supplied her with a car, a nice car. And I get the evil eye if I buy a freakin usb cable for my kid's computer. But she can buy me a damned $1200 ring. WTF? Sounds like you married for money. Divorce, say it with me. |
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Posted: 2/1/2011 5:53:56 AM EDT
[#39]
Quoted:
Poor guy. You have a wife who buys you gifts. You have a wife who thinks about you enough to buy you gifts. You have a wife. Lots don't. My experience so far is that wives are highly overrated. I was happier single. And will probably be that way again. And a gift for me bought with my money is not a gift in my view. |
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Posted: 2/1/2011 5:54:47 AM EDT
[#40]
must have pics of wife
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Posted: 2/1/2011 5:55:34 AM EDT
[#41]
This thread reminds me of how good I have it.
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Posted: 2/1/2011 5:57:14 AM EDT
[#42]
My SO bought me a watch for $800, that she could have gotten from her close friend, who works for the company, for around $100.
She spent more because she thought I "deserved" it. I didn't need the watch! I didn't want the watch! If i had wanted the watch, I would have bought it for myself (FROM HER FRIGGING FRIEND!!!!) She is in Dental school, I am in nursing school. I sold my business and I am supporting us both with my savings. It PISSED me off more than one can ever imagine! I agree OP. Tell her to take it back! I hate rings and would never wear one.... |
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Posted: 2/1/2011 5:58:37 AM EDT
[#43]
Quoted:
Quoted:
Well good for you guys. More background: After looking around for years and dating supermodel type chicks, etc. and the usual array of single moms, I decided that I wanted a working woman rather than another mouth to feed. This after losing 250k (effectively my retirement and kids college fund) in divorce #1. So I found a gal working as a tech writer and made a deal. We both work for three years and then you can do anything you want. This way I do the heavy financial lifting and we end up with a paid off house and retirement fund. Now coast for 20 years. NO. she loses her job after 6 months and tries this and that, etc. all the while I'm supporting now.....drum roll....another mouth. Great. I've had counselors get in her face and ask why any adult would think they can do this. I've had apologies from her, but still.....no work. Now after 10 years, I have no hope of retirement because she has been nothing but a financial drain. Damn. On the flip side in every way, she's a good companion, sex is good, she's fairly good looking (former lingerie model), a great cook. But damn. I can't afford to fix my truck or buy my kids the things I would like them to have. But I've supplied her with a car, a nice car. And I get the evil eye if I buy a freakin usb cable for my kid's computer. But she can buy me a damned $1200 ring. WTF? Sounds like you married for money. Divorce, say it with me. Only a fool would marry someone for 'love' alone. And I didn't marry for money. I just didn't want a 'stay at home' wife. I wanted a partner. If I wanted a 'stay at home' wife i would have opted to hire a housekeeper. It would have been much cheaper. There is nothing wrong with being pragmatic. Most of the women I have seen in this life are radically pragmatic and care more about the size of your wallet than anything else. Don't ever tell me it is any other way. |
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Posted: 2/1/2011 5:59:11 AM EDT
[#44]
Quoted: Ever think it's you and not them. When my wife was a stay at home mom she busted her ass and the money I put in the account was just as much hers as mine.Quoted: Poor guy. You have a wife who buys you gifts. You have a wife who thinks about you enough to buy you gifts. You have a wife. Lots don't. My experience so far is that wives are highly overrated. I was happier single. And will probably be that way again. And a gift for me bought with my money is not a gift in my view. |
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Posted: 2/1/2011 5:59:51 AM EDT
[#45]
Wow, now there's a happy marriage.
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Posted: 2/1/2011 6:00:19 AM EDT
[#46]
BTW. I'm just venting.
Rationality will ensue sometime later today. |
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Posted: 2/1/2011 6:00:24 AM EDT
[#47]
Quoted: She'll find someone to appreciate it. |
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Posted: 2/1/2011 6:03:13 AM EDT
[#48]
Quoted: Quoted: IMO, "her" money and "his" money is for kids that are dating, not adults that are married. The issue you are describing is about piss-poor communication and responsibility, not about "whose" money it is. You are not reading it fully. I put the money in for everybody. Everybody. All decisions on 'our' money need to be joint decisions. if one person decides to unilaterally take money out to do this shit it's a slap in the face to me personally. This is a woman who has a BS in engineering and has been 'looking' for work for fucking 8 years. There's plenty of blunt communication from me on this issue I guarantee. She's either malicious or dumb as a rock. I still haven't figured out which. It's kind of hard to discuss a "present". Aren't they supposed to be a surprise? |
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Posted: 2/1/2011 6:03:26 AM EDT
[#49]
Quoted:
Quoted:
Ever think it's you and not them. When my wife was a stay at home mom she busted her ass and the money I put in the account was just as much hers as mine.
Quoted:
Poor guy. You have a wife who buys you gifts. You have a wife who thinks about you enough to buy you gifts. You have a wife. Lots don't. My experience so far is that wives are highly overrated. I was happier single. And will probably be that way again. And a gift for me bought with my money is not a gift in my view. I agree totally with this. Now how would you feel if she had a BS degree and refused to work. NO kids. We have NO kids at home. I do MOST of the housework. How would you feel about your wife if you addressed this issue repeatedly and she still refused to work. Please tell me it would be ok with you and you would not feel the least bit of resentment. |
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Posted: 2/1/2011 6:04:47 AM EDT
[#50]
Quoted:
Quoted:
Quoted:
IMO, "her" money and "his" money is for kids that are dating, not adults that are married. The issue you are describing is about piss-poor communication and responsibility, not about "whose" money it is. Got to go with this answer. Disagree, the Wife and I split up the bills, mortgage etc twice a month. We have no financial stress and both of us work outside of the home. We also split up the chores. Dont know, works for us. Doesn't sound like an "us" at all. More like a business partnership. |
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