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Posted: 5/19/2005 6:51:11 PM EST
[Last Edit: 5/19/2005 10:47:56 PM EST by PeteCO]
Being from the IT industry, which seems to have pioneered this bullshit, what is with the incessant capitalizing of ANY fucking compound word?

Say "Compoundword", or say "Compound Word", but why "CompoundWord"? That, along with using dotted notation with phone numbers (because IP addresses are so "trendy") pisses me off - like this ---> 719.555.1212. For years people used (719) 555-1212 and 719-555-1212.

One more moronic thing is these fuckers who think their business card was designed by e.e. cummings. All of a sudden capital letters aren't cool. It's bad enough they had to turn the print 90 degrees so the card was now taller than wide, but that wasn't such a big deal (after all, NO ONE uses a card file anymore when you can just enter someone's contact info in a "PDA")

That, combined with people who say "We're not gonna do that now" as "The committee has decided that we are not going to pursue that strategic initiative at this point in time". Same goes for overuse and misuse of the phrase "data point" and the word "viable". As in "we will use your inherent dislike of anchovies as a data point for selecting a viable pizza to order for lunch".

I'll not even start with the "verbing" of nouns.
Link Posted: 5/19/2005 6:54:45 PM EST
I hate "Let's take this discussion offline" when in a meeting.
Link Posted: 5/19/2005 6:58:29 PM EST
The new trendy words that I notice are:
"share"
"space"
"stack"

My mind goes elsewhere when I hear or read any of them.

DanM
Link Posted: 5/19/2005 7:18:56 PM EST
I have seen many international phone using periods as delimiters so that style may not be from ip addresses. One thing that I do like about that style is that the country code is easy to spot since there is a + in front of it.
Link Posted: 5/19/2005 7:22:02 PM EST
Anyone who still uses the word "paradigm" should have his light punched out.
Link Posted: 5/19/2005 7:27:24 PM EST

Originally Posted By Javak:
Anyone who still uses the word "paradigm" should have his light punched out.



BIG +1


Top of my pet-peeve list:
Broadband
Global

There's more, but I'm pissed off enough about the first two I can't think of the others offhand.
Link Posted: 5/19/2005 7:31:53 PM EST
Synergy

"Going Forward"


From Dilbert:

"Leveraged Synergies across all Technology Platforms."
Link Posted: 5/19/2005 7:41:06 PM EST
we're calling some of our product enhancements "sparklers".
Link Posted: 5/19/2005 7:42:51 PM EST
Im just glad they stopped using "The Information Super HighWay"


Link Posted: 5/19/2005 8:02:59 PM EST
If you think that's bad, try working for the .gov in IT...specifically the Department of the Army...there are so many acronymns and assinine words tossed around it's ridiculous...
Link Posted: 5/19/2005 8:21:10 PM EST
Link Posted: 5/19/2005 8:25:56 PM EST

That, along with using dotted notation with phone numbers (because IP addresses are so "trendy") pisses me off - like this ---> 719.555.1212.

More people used the format with periods than the other ones you listed long before the Internet was ever created. It has nothing to do with trying to look like IP addresses.z
Link Posted: 5/19/2005 8:26:04 PM EST

Originally Posted By Javak:
Anyone who still uses the word "paradigm" should have his light punched out.



Yeah I forgot about that one. Stephen Covey should be burned in effigy for his ability to work that word into ANY fucking interview or book he has even been present for.
Link Posted: 5/20/2005 3:02:13 AM EST

Originally Posted By zoom:

That, along with using dotted notation with phone numbers (because IP addresses are so "trendy") pisses me off - like this ---> 719.555.1212.

More people used the format with periods than the other ones you listed long before the Internet was ever created. It has nothing to do with trying to look like IP addresses.z



Well, it seems to have significantly gained in popularity in the past couple of years.

At any rate, the REALLY dumbass thing is the whole "let's put two words together, and instead of a space we'll use capital letters" thing. That and the "hey, I'm important and smart too" jargon.
Link Posted: 5/20/2005 3:09:58 AM EST

Originally Posted By Javak:
Anyone who still uses the word "paradigm" should have his light punched out.



+1000

Especially when they use it incorrectly. Buzzwords are for morons who can't think but try to look smart.
Link Posted: 5/20/2005 3:16:05 AM EST
Me (circa 1995)- "We've got a serious fucking problem here."

Boss- "Don't use the word 'Problem' around clients. We only have 'Challenges' or 'Issues'".

Me- "We've got a serious fucking problem here."


I always hated consultant speak. Thank God I'm out of consulting.

But I've been doing the 555.555.1212 style since the early 90s and it is because of IP addressing. I used to do so much subnetting and crap on router consoles that it became a natural way of typing numbers. I do it with Soc Sec numbers and dates and well. 111.11.1111 and 5.20.05
Link Posted: 5/20/2005 3:19:00 AM EST
Around my company wannabes pick up the latest jargon and inject them into (pointless)conference calls that pass for meetings.

Metrics has come to the forefront.

Leveraged synergy & Quality Touches with our external customers have also been tossed around a bunch.


We are now suffering the effects of all those MBA's that were passed out in the 90's. Those marginally effective turds are in their 30's & climbing the corp ladder. They seem to be pretty desperate to at least sound intelligent.
Link Posted: 5/20/2005 3:22:18 AM EST
Reminds me of being back in Seattle, 1999-2000. My manager's entire vocabulary consisted of bullshit like this, and it was a Starbucks-fueled 10,000 words per minute.

On behalf of all former and current IT pogues, I present: The Web Economy Bullshit Generator. Fun for hours.
Link Posted: 5/20/2005 3:22:53 AM EST

Originally Posted By Handsome_Rob:
I hate "Let's take this discussion offline" when in a meeting.




+1
Link Posted: 5/20/2005 3:24:36 AM EST

Originally Posted By PeteCO:

Originally Posted By zoom:

That, along with using dotted notation with phone numbers (because IP addresses are so "trendy") pisses me off - like this ---> 719.555.1212.

More people used the format with periods than the other ones you listed long before the Internet was ever created. It has nothing to do with trying to look like IP addresses.z



Well, it seems to have significantly gained in popularity in the past couple of years.

At any rate, the REALLY dumbass thing is the whole "let's put two words together, and instead of a space we'll use capital letters" thing. That and the "hey, I'm important and smart too" jargon.




That's a common thing when writing code ... at least for me it is.

I don't do it in normal writing like email though.

Link Posted: 5/20/2005 3:31:01 AM EST

Originally Posted By PeteCO:
Say "Compoundword", or say "Compound Word", but why "CompoundWord"?



You can blame Microsoft for that one. That's VB-style variable naming.

I like it for file names too, but you're right, it doesn't belong in general writing.
Link Posted: 5/20/2005 3:43:27 AM EST
How about:

"I'm going to reach out to Jim, regarding this issue" instead of "I'll get Jim on the phoneto talk about this"

Freakin bean heads. I deal with them every freakin day.

We currently have a project named "Synergy", by a corporate dickhead. Puke
Link Posted: 5/20/2005 3:52:01 AM EST
[Last Edit: 5/20/2005 3:52:47 AM EST by XM777]

Originally Posted By TacticalMan:

You can blame Microsoft for that one. That's VB-style variable naming.




Widely taught Cobol/Fortran/Pascal (etc.) style var name coding, long before MS even existed.
Link Posted: 5/20/2005 3:53:53 AM EST
Shows my languages! I never encountered it until I started using VB!
Link Posted: 5/20/2005 4:04:39 AM EST

At any rate, the REALLY dumbass thing is the whole "let's put two words together, and instead of a space we'll use capital letters" thing.

I've churned through about a dozen idiot programmers over the past year, and every one of them named their variables something like that. Instead of naming a variable something like invoice_grand_total, they'd name it invoiceGrandTotal. They, literally, did not understand the version with the underscores. They could not comprehend it. I saw one guy that graduated with a masters in Comp Sci stare at the screen for several minutes trying to comprehend the meaning of grand_total. After he did a text search and replace to change it to grandTotal, he was ok. Aside: after I had him watch me spend six minutes and twenty seconds writing the program I had given him six weeks to write, I fired him. The problem is that the schools instead of teaching programming, they teach VisualBasic. Note the screwy capitalization in the name VisualBasic.

Whatever you think of the Micros~1 idiots' use of the capitalization, it's better than their use of Hungarian notation. Charles Simonyi from Microsoft should be shot for not only pushing its use in programming, but also pushing its use in everyday business communication. With it, instead of naming something like parent, you name it hwndParent. Instead of naming a file pointer fp, you call it lpszFile. I did some contract work a few years ago for a company that started using that notation everywhere they could. For example, rather than calling me a consultant, I was a ms-ta+hConsultant which meant I was a member that worked for the sales team that was paid hourly but not for travel. The company had hundreds of idiotic abbreviations like that. Reading a memo from them was worse than trying to decode Geek Code (geekcode.com).z
Link Posted: 5/20/2005 4:06:31 AM EST
[Last Edit: 5/20/2005 4:08:56 AM EST by PeteCO]

Originally Posted By Red_Beard:

Originally Posted By PeteCO:

Originally Posted By zoom:

That, along with using dotted notation with phone numbers (because IP addresses are so "trendy") pisses me off - like this ---> 719.555.1212.

More people used the format with periods than the other ones you listed long before the Internet was ever created. It has nothing to do with trying to look like IP addresses.z



Well, it seems to have significantly gained in popularity in the past couple of years.

At any rate, the REALLY dumbass thing is the whole "let's put two words together, and instead of a space we'll use capital letters" thing. That and the "hey, I'm important and smart too" jargon.




That's a common thing when writing code ... at least for me it is.

I don't do it in normal writing like email though.




Yeah, I'm aware of using it in code, but I've not seen hungarian notation used for shit like product names, etc. For instance, they can't call it "Microsoft Front Page", but rather "FrontPage". WTF? Same with "QuickBooks" and all the other bullshit. It used to be used just for software, now I see it everywhere.

And yes, alot of the Dilbert-speak is excessively touchy-feely. Just like the example of "I'm going to reach out to Jim". Makes me want to puke.
Link Posted: 5/20/2005 4:09:08 AM EST
The compound word thing is more likely for trademarking reasons: "Super Product" isn't unique, "SuperProduct" is. It's like the old style of changing the spelling of "cheese" to "cheez".
Link Posted: 5/20/2005 4:13:01 AM EST
[Last Edit: 5/20/2005 4:13:46 AM EST by PeteCO]
Some of the better ones I get with the Web Economy Bullshit Generator™:

incentivize next-generation models
productize one-to-one convergence
scale granular paradigms
evolve enterprise niches
incubate back-end methodologies
facilitate B2C supply-chains
architect mission-critical channels
redefine dynamic deliverables

Link Posted: 5/20/2005 4:22:57 AM EST
Extranet... Superfluous, misused word popular with pinheads. Use of which will get you shitlisted in my ACL.


Link Posted: 5/20/2005 5:10:54 AM EST

Originally Posted By Sub-MOA:
Extranet... Superfluous, misused word popular with pinheads. Use of which will get you shitlisted in my ACL.





Link Posted: 5/20/2005 5:26:31 AM EST
Conference calls with sales weenies are some of my favorites. "Let's talk offline". The latest one that I've begun to notice since particiating in these conference calls is "Ping me later" or "I'll ping you offline". That last one REALLY irks me for obvious reasons.

I had a project manager promise to "ping me offline". When he called, I saw his name on the phone. When I picked it up, the conversation went like this:

ME: "Echo"
PM: "Hello?"
ME: "Echo"
PM: "Are you okay?"
ME: "Echo"
PM: "Why do you keep saying echo?"
ME: "Echo. I've succesfully replied 4 out of 4 times"
<click>

He didn't think it was funny.
Link Posted: 5/20/2005 5:26:59 AM EST

Originally Posted By PeteCO:

Originally Posted By Sub-MOA:
Extranet... Superfluous, misused word popular with pinheads. Use of which will get you shitlisted in my ACL.








See! That's how it starts. Now I'm gonna use that phrase today to sound pithy and all hell is gonna break loose.

"My ACL" - I love it!
Link Posted: 5/20/2005 5:30:55 AM EST
[Last Edit: 5/20/2005 5:34:15 AM EST by PeteCO]

Originally Posted By SubnetMask:
Conference calls with sales weenies are some of my favorites. "Let's talk offline". The latest one that I've begun to notice since particiating in these conference calls is "Ping me later" or "I'll ping you offline". That last one REALLY irks me for obvious reasons.

I had a project manager promise to "ping me offline". When he called, I saw his name on the phone. When I picked it up, the conversation went like this:

ME: "Echo"
PM: "Hello?"
ME: "Echo"
PM: "Are you okay?"
ME: "Echo"
PM: "Why do you keep saying echo?"
ME: "Echo. I've succesfully replied 4 out of 4 times"
<click>

He didn't think it was funny.



Get yourself a book called The Story About Ping. I used to leave it lying conspicuously on my desk for the anal-probe questions about the term from non-network guys invading my office.

Some of the reviews on Amazon are great. Look at how many people found the first review helpful I bet that author is happy she chose that name for the book - I bought it, and probably thousands of others in the IT field have as well.
The Story About Ping - LINK
Link Posted: 5/20/2005 5:32:06 AM EST

Originally Posted By zoom:

That, along with using dotted notation with phone numbers (because IP addresses are so "trendy") pisses me off - like this ---> 719.555.1212.

More people used the format with periods than the other ones you listed long before the Internet was ever created. It has nothing to do with trying to look like IP addresses.z



Its Euro gay. I'll continue with good ol' American dashes in my phone number, thanks.
Link Posted: 5/20/2005 5:38:23 AM EST
Wow!!! Smart people sure are...........!!!!!!
Link Posted: 5/20/2005 6:16:41 AM EST
It doesn't end with IT lingo.
Look around here, there's stupid jargon galore.
What about IMHO?
Most often used as a smart-assed add-on to a stupid comment.
Of course it's your opinion asshole.
IMHO, guys who use IMHO can fuck off.
Link Posted: 5/20/2005 6:24:07 AM EST
[Last Edit: 5/20/2005 6:27:48 AM EST by Sub-MOA]

Originally Posted By PeteCO:

Originally Posted By Sub-MOA:
Extranet... Superfluous, misused word popular with pinheads. Use of which will get you shitlisted in my ACL.








You think getting shitlisted in my acl is a laughing matter? Wait until HR starts sending you NAKs with a list of *.jpgs in your temp file or a female COWorker files a 500 error for the sexy email that "you" sent her.

ALL data routes through layer 3!!!
Link Posted: 5/20/2005 6:33:02 AM EST

Originally Posted By PeteCO:

And yes, alot of the Dilbert-speak is excessively touchy-feely. Just like the example of "I'm going to reach out to Jim". Makes me want to puke.



"Someone reaches out to me, they better be careful or they'll pull back a bloody stump!" - Great way to counter that in meetings.
Link Posted: 5/20/2005 6:37:22 AM EST

Originally Posted By TacticalMan:

Originally Posted By PeteCO:
Say "Compoundword", or say "Compound Word", but why "CompoundWord"?



You can blame Microsoft for that one. That's VB-style variable naming.



At least they are not using Java-style:


I was at the coffeeShop and purchase a mochaLatteLightFoam.

Link Posted: 5/20/2005 6:42:16 AM EST

Originally Posted By TheCynic:

Originally Posted By TacticalMan:

Originally Posted By PeteCO:
Say "Compoundword", or say "Compound Word", but why "CompoundWord"?



You can blame Microsoft for that one. That's VB-style variable naming.



At least they are not using Java-style:


I was at the coffeeShop and purchase a mochaLatteLightFoam.




postCount++
Link Posted: 5/20/2005 6:44:38 AM EST

I'll not even start with the "verbing" of nouns.


Irony
Link Posted: 5/20/2005 6:49:16 AM EST
A few of my "favorites"...

touch base
mission critical
run with it


Link Posted: 5/20/2005 6:52:18 AM EST

Originally Posted By TacticalMan:
You can blame Microsoft for that one. That's VB-style variable naming.

I like it for file names too, but you're right, it doesn't belong in general writing.



VB Style?!?!? Come on! That's not specific to Visual Basic or Microsoft in general. I can think of any number of programming languages that use capitalization of each word in identifiers by convention. The merging of words is simply because most languages forbid spaces in identifiers.
Link Posted: 5/20/2005 6:58:26 AM EST

programming, they teach VisualBasic. Note the screwy capitalization in the name VisualBasic.


Visual Basic is two words and normally written as such, thus the capitalization of "Basic" is just good grammer as it is a proper noun. As to whether or not Visual Basic is programming, that's another thread.


Whatever you think of the Micros~1 idiots' use of the capitalization, it's better than their use of Hungarian notation.


Again, not a Microsoft invention or specific to their languages. Would you prefer to just infer the types of all variables?
Link Posted: 5/20/2005 7:03:24 AM EST


postCount++;



fixed.
Link Posted: 5/20/2005 7:06:24 AM EST

Originally Posted By idonthaveaname:


postCount++;



fixed.



Damn syntax errors!

The ARFCOM compiler is picky...
Link Posted: 5/20/2005 7:06:43 AM EST

Originally Posted By idonthaveaname:

programming, they teach VisualBasic. Note the screwy capitalization in the name VisualBasic.


Visual Basic is two words and normally written as such, thus the capitalization of "Basic" is just good grammer as it is a proper noun. As to whether or not Visual Basic is programming, that's another thread.


Whatever you think of the Micros~1 idiots' use of the capitalization, it's better than their use of Hungarian notation.


Again, not a Microsoft invention or specific to their languages. Would you prefer to just infer the types of all variables?



Oh holy dogshit on a pop-tart....just use a language where everything is a var
Link Posted: 5/20/2005 7:09:19 AM EST

Originally Posted By idonthaveaname:

programming, they teach VisualBasic. Note the screwy capitalization in the name VisualBasic.


Visual Basic is two words and normally written as such, thus the capitalization of "Basic" is just good grammer as it is a proper noun. As to whether or not Visual Basic is programming, that's another thread.


Whatever you think of the Micros~1 idiots' use of the capitalization, it's better than their use of Hungarian notation.


Again, not a Microsoft invention or specific to their languages. Would you prefer to just infer the types of all variables?



Actually, BASIC is an acronym and should be all caps...it stands for Beginner's All-purpose Symbolic Instruction Code...yes, I'm a geek...
Link Posted: 5/20/2005 7:16:15 AM EST
[Last Edit: 5/20/2005 7:20:34 AM EST by idonthaveaname]


Actually, BASIC is an acronym and should be all caps...it stands for Beginner's All-purpose Symbolic Instruction Code...yes, I'm a geek...



You are correct, should be Visual BASIC.

ETA: Reminds me of a local school that advertises during daytime TV. They had a commercial running with two supposed students discussing what they had learned there. They mentioned the programming languages Visual BASICS and C+ (note the single plus). It annoyed me so much I actually called to tell them how retarded they look to anyone in the industry. The lady thanked me for my call but they continued to run the ad for at least another two years just as it was.
Link Posted: 5/20/2005 7:21:24 AM EST

Originally Posted By idonthaveaname:


Actually, BASIC is an acronym and should be all caps...it stands for Beginner's All-purpose Symbolic Instruction Code...yes, I'm a geek...



You are correct, should be Visual BASIC.

ETA: Reminds me of a local school that advertises during daytime TV. They had a commercial running with two supposed students discussing what they had learned there. They mentioned the programming languages Visual BASICS and C+ (note the single plus). It annoyed me so much I actually called to tell them how retarded they look to anyone in the industry. The lady thanked me for my call but they continued to run the ad for at least another two years just as it was.



THAT is fucking hilarious !!!!
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