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Posted: 9/2/2004 9:58:49 AM EDT

HundredPercenter News
September 1st, 2004
by Malachy Joyce

HundredPercenter Infiltrates the Anti-Everything Protests

Being a lifetime resident of New York, I felt it was necessary to check out,
first hand, what these protesters were all about. So I got together with a few
friends from work and set off to walk the same pavement as these
malcontents. We converge on the corner of 42nd street and 5th ave, near the
library. As soon as we get there, we see at least 100 police officers and
countless vehicles. The protesters were supposed to mass a rally at the library
at 6PM. It was almost 6:30 and I was getting impatient. We wait, and wait
some more and all we see are a few gay guys with anti-Bush rainbow flags and
several awkward looking individuals with 'Buck Fush' T-shirts.

My friends and I, realizing that liberals are unable to keep to a schedule,
decide to head over to Herald Square, where we heard that many protesters
had formed.On the way to 34th street we saw about 100 protesters being
arrested and hauled into a city bus by police, nice.So we get to Herald Square,
near Macy's, and we are right in the middle of a mediocre ranting contest. The
make up of the crowd consisted of women with hairy armpits and men with
un-kept beards holding up 'pro-choice', 'stop exploiting 9/11','buck fush' and
many other hateful signs. Their favorite rallying cry was 'Fu*k Bush, fFu*k the
War' and 'republicans go home',which was amusing since many of the 'testers
were from out of state.Quick note, never question a liberals patriotism.
Speaking of patriotism,there were many New York Lawyers Guild observers
and New York Civil Liberty cranks amongst the dreg.

My friends and I, being thoroughly unimpressed by the weak rally, crossed
the street and decided to get as close to Madison Square Garden as possible.
However, while walking a half-block, near Macy's, about 10 of the biggest
police that you can imagine rush through the anti-everything crowd screaming
'out of the way', 'out of the way.' The cops moved in front of Macy's exits and
closed the doors. Apparently, something had occurred inside the store and the
police wanted to block all exits,'nobody in, nobody out.' It was a surreal
moment. You should have seen the fear and panic on the tough guys with the
'buck fush' signs when these shock troopers mowed them down in full riot

After that, which was pretty cool, we stood next to MSNBC's trailers to view
the absurdities. I saw J.C Watts( ex- republican congressman) on his way to
Mr. Hardball himself,which was a surprise. Other than that, the protests were
non-eventful. There was no organization whatsoever. Do not believe the crap
you read. These people are just wandering around with their treasonous
slogans aimlessly. There was plenty of hate and marijuana to go around, but
no substance. The people protesting are complete morons and should
addressed as morons until they leave my city.

I am not exaggerating, not one of the protesters that I saw resembled a decent
American. In layman's terms, I felt dirty just standing next to them. Their
hygiene was noticeably impaired and there mental status was questionable.
I were a drug dealer, I probably would have made a million dollars in the short
time I was amongst them.

The New York City police were very impressive and very intimidating. I loved it.
They were highly organized and demonstrated excellent crowd control
methods. In short, the morons that are failures in life were absolute failures
at protesting. They sucked.

From the pics I have seen...I wouldn't be able to fool anyone into thinking I am a liberal!

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