I met this chick on MySpace who lives locally and took her out to dinner - uneventful. .  A week later i asked if she wanted to go out again and she agreed to and and suggested she bring her cute lesbian friend along. Ha! Why not?!  So after we ate it was decided that we'd go to an adult book store and browse around. (Her friend is a cute red-head and only 19!)   So we paid for our stuff and decided to come back to my place to watch this raunchy dvd i bought - Whoo hoo!

We were sitting around talking and i was preparing to play the dvd, but the damn dvd player wasn't F'n working!WTF!?  
The girl i was 'dating' asked to have a smoke while i got things right with the dvd player. I suggested she go outside on the balcony 'cause it was a nice day.  Meanwhile i was distracted with this cute, flirtatious 19yr old lesbian chick in the livingroom(whoo hoo!)and trying to fix the damn dvd player
After (we'll call her crystal)  was finished having a smoke she said that she received an important phone call and they both had to go immediately - WTF!??

Fast forward three days later . . .  i'm fixin' to do a load of laundry and notice all of my coins are missing from the container i had them in!?

So i call 'crystal' and ask if she knew anything about my missing coins($25 - $30) - she replys 'yeah i took em, f*ck-off'   Hmmm ok.. I called the lesbian friend, and she said that 'crystal' has an expensive habit and is a clepto because of it.

Long story short, i called the cops and she had to repay me $25 to keep me from pressing charges of theft against her. The local PD is familiar with her and her endeavours.

MySpace junkies . . .

Live and learn

Well, that story started out like a Penthouse letter and went downhill real fast...

you know what to do........

hit the redhead lesbo.

post pics.

So, you gonna try to hook up with the red head?

If she's a crackwhore might as well make it worth it..For $20 you could probably get 3-4 BJ's

Yeah, those types of chicks have serious issues.  Good for sex, but don't trust them as far as you can throw them.

Paging Kangaroo...

Quoted: If she's a crackwhore might as well make it worth it..For $20 you could probably get 3-4 BJ's

LoL
I guess from her perspective she made $20 without having to perform oral

The redhead is a hardcore lesbian. . She's not a man-hater but pretty close. I'd still put a hump on her though(edit - if she'd let me)

Quoted: Well, that story started out like a Penthouse letter and went downhill real fast...

[sigh]  They usually do.

Your lucky she didnt skin you and where you like buffalo bob

Dear Penthouse:

Another MySpace Success Story!!

Quoted: Your lucky she didnt skin you and where you like buffalo bob

Wow.
Well it sounds like someone didn't read the interweb dating tutorial

Don't give up, you gotta weed thru a bunch before it gets good.
Takes practice.

From the topic title, I was expecting a story about a date with a 13 year-old.

You are lucky you're still alive.

Lucky you didn't wake up in a tub of ice.

Quoted: Lucky you didn't wake up in a tub of ice.

Missing a kidney.

Quoted: From the topic title, I was expecting a story about a date with a 13 year-old.

More like a 50 year old bald fat guy with a jungle on his back.

I had high hopes for the story and then it went down hill fast.  OK.  Repost with a happy ending for all us married old guys.

Quoted: I had high hopes for the story and then it went down hill fast.  OK.  Repost with a happy ending for all us married old guys.

+1.  You can masturbate to this thread, but it'll cost you!

Cyanide & Happiness @ Explosm.net