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9/22/2017 12:11:25 AM
Posted: 8/14/2005 6:30:42 PM EDT



My wife (the former Miss XXXX) is not planning on changing her last name, so what would her prefix/title be?

Would it be Mrs. XXXX, despite the fact that there is no Mr. XXXX, but only a Mr. DK-Prof ?
Would it be Ms. XXXX, precisely because there is no corresponding Mr. XXXX ?
Or should she just go by Dr. XXXX to avoid any and all misunderstanding?

I guess I am asking if a woman can be called Mrs. XXXX, even if there is no Mr. XXXX (and assuming she is not a widow).

Unrelated, but in case anyone is interested in WHY she is not changing her name, it's because:
1. Neither of us particularly care.
2. Profesionally, it could be problematic, as there could be confusion as to her publication record (especially when she goes up for promotions with external review).
3. We do not have, nor are we ever going to have, any children - so having a common last name is not important. (Which wouldn't matter anyway, since Denmark has now allowed a return to the traditional Danish naming system, so last names no longer have to be passed down, but instead the suffix ...søn or ...datter is added to the parent's first name)
Link Posted: 8/14/2005 6:31:10 PM EDT
[Last Edit: 8/14/2005 6:32:47 PM EDT by Bama-Shooter]
Ms.

ETA: Or Dr.

To me women should aleast to the Mrs. XXX-DK-Prof
Link Posted: 8/14/2005 6:33:28 PM EDT
[Last Edit: 8/14/2005 6:44:02 PM EDT by 4xys2xxs]
She should be addressed as Dr. XXXX.

Or hypenated as Mrs. XXXX-DkProf

Mail should be addressed to Dr. XXXX and Mr. DkProf

ETA: IBTP

Edited again
Link Posted: 8/14/2005 6:33:40 PM EDT
I added a poll !! But nobody got in a IBTP !! w00t!!


Link Posted: 8/14/2005 6:33:54 PM EDT
My boss is Icelandic and has that kind of name.... *******dottir, and her brother is ******son. I thought that was really interesting.
Link Posted: 8/14/2005 6:36:26 PM EDT

Originally Posted By jcp84:
My boss is Icelandic and has that kind of name.... *******dottir, and her brother is ******son. I thought that was really interesting.



Yeah iceland still uses it.

It was apparently discontinued in Denmark, Sweden and Norway in the 1700s (or early 1800) or something, because it made it too difficult for buraucracies to keep track of people.

However, now that computers, tax records, etc - make it very easy to keep track of people, the Danish government apparently decided that people can go back to the traditional system without it causing a problem.

It's a very recent ruling, so I'm curious to see how many people will actually start using it.
Link Posted: 8/14/2005 6:37:19 PM EDT
"the Former Mrs. XXXX"

Are you gonna have kids? Please don't tell me that they are going to have hyphenated names (this is little "Courtney Thorne-DK-prof")

You are the man and you must command her to take your name. If you Danes were tougher with your women, Sweden might not have been able to crush yall forever and over again (Amen*)



*with apologies to Randy Travis**


** retracted - is he a switch hitter? no thread hijack intended

Link Posted: 8/14/2005 6:39:32 PM EDT

Originally Posted By Merrell:
"the Former Mrs. XXXX"

Are you gonna have kids? Please don't tell me that they are going to have hyphenated names (this is little "Courtney Thorne-DK-prof")

You are the man and you must command her to take your name. If you Danes were tougher with your women, Sweden might not have been able to crush yall forever and over again (Amen*)







Bastard!
Link Posted: 8/14/2005 6:41:05 PM EDT

Originally Posted By DK-Prof:


My wife (the former Miss XXXX) is not planning on changing her last name, so what would her prefix/title be?

Would it be Mrs. XXXX, despite the fact that there is no Mr. XXXX, but only a Mr. DK-Prof ?
Would it be Ms. XXXX, precisely because there is no corresponding Mr. XXXX ?
Or should she just go by Dr. XXXX to avoid any and all misunderstanding?

I guess I am asking if a woman can be called Mrs. XXXX, even if there is no Mr. XXXX (and assuming she is not a widow).

Unrelated, but in case anyone is interested in WHY she is not changing her name, it's because:
1. Neither of us particularly care.
2. Profesionally, it could be problematic, as there could be confusion as to her publication record (especially when she goes up for promotions with external review).
3. We do not have, nor are we ever going to have, any children - so having a common last name is not important. (Which wouldn't matter anyway, since Denmark has now allowed a return to the traditional Danish naming system, so last names no longer have to be passed down, but instead the suffix ...søn or ...datter is added to the parent's first name)



4. I'm totally and completely whipped.

Aw, c'mon, you knew it was coming. I couldn't resist.

FWIW my wife was going to try Mrs. xxxxxx-giacutter but after about a day it got to be too much writing and she is now just Mrs. giacutter and she likes it.


Belated congrats on your nuptuals, BTW.



Link Posted: 8/14/2005 6:41:53 PM EDT
If she has been going by Dr., she should continue to do so. Otherwise, she would go by Ms.
Link Posted: 8/14/2005 6:41:55 PM EDT
Ergh. This shouldn't be an issue! She's now, and unless there's a divorce, "Mrs. Prof".
Link Posted: 8/14/2005 6:43:11 PM EDT
[Last Edit: 8/14/2005 6:44:12 PM EDT by MrsGloftoe]
Link Posted: 8/14/2005 6:43:19 PM EDT
Why doesn't she take your name, and still publish under her maiden name?

It shouldn't make any difference in the publishing of books.

And I don't understand how it coul affect her professional carrer by taking your name.

Professionals get married all the time, and divorced and change their names.
Link Posted: 8/14/2005 6:44:19 PM EDT
[Last Edit: 8/14/2005 6:44:54 PM EDT by kythri]
Bah.

If she's a doctor or professional, I suppose it's alright to retain the last name, but it should be hyphenated - Mrs./Dr. Blarblar-Prof

It should NOT remain unaltered.

And children take the name of the father.

NO EXCEPTIONS!

Link Posted: 8/14/2005 6:46:05 PM EDT
* Traditional Danish Wedding Reception Song *


Ow she's a Lego-house,
She's mighty mighty, just lettin' it all hang out
She's a Lego-house, that lady's stacked, and that's a fact,
Ain't holdin' nothin' back, ow she's a Lego-house,
Well we're together everybody knows,
This is how the story goes.
She knows she's got everything, that a woman needs, to get a man.
How can she lose, with such a youth,
Thirty six, twenty four, thirty six, what a winning hand!
She's a Lego-house, she's mighty mighty, just lettin' it all hang out.
Yea she's a Lego-house, that lady's stacked,
And that's a fact,
Ain't holdin' nothin back, oh she's a Lego-house,
Yeah she's the one, the only one,
Built like an Amazon.
The clothes she wears, her sexy ways,
Makes her, ole man wish, for younger days yeah yeah
She knows she's built, and knows how to please.
Sho' nuff can knock a strong man to his knees.
Cause she's a Lego-house,
She's mighty mighty, just lettin' it all hang out.
Oh she's a Lego-house,
That lady's stacked, and that's a fact,
Ain't holdin' nothin' back, yeah
Shake it down, shake it down now, shake it down shake it down now
Shake it down, shake it down now, shake it down shake it ooo ga ga
Shake it down, shake it down now, shake it down shake it down now
Shake it down, shake it down now, shake it down shake it shake it
Lego-House - Yeah, she's mighty mighty, just letting it all hang out
Ah what a Lego-house, yeah she's the one, the only one, built like an Amazon.
Shake it down, shake it down now, shake it down shake it down now
Shake it down, shake it down now, shake it down shake it shake it
Shake it down, shake it down now, shake it down shake it down now
Shake it down, shake it down now, shake it down shake it shake it
BREAK
Oh what a Lego-house, she's mighty mighty, just lettin' it all hang out.
Yea she's a Lego-house, that lady's stacked, that's the fact,
Ain't holdin' nothin' back, Owww she's a Lego-house,
Yea she's the one, the only one, built like a Amazon


Link Posted: 8/14/2005 6:51:28 PM EDT
That's a good point - if we wanted to change her name, I guess there would be nothing stopping her from still publishing under her old name (or even with a hyphenated version to avoid confusion).

I remember that she asked me if I wanted her to change it, but I really didn't care - it's not like she is desperately wanting to NOT change her name, and so neither of us see it as a big deal - especially since we're not having any kids. I guess it's particulalry unimportant when we live and work in separate states - maybe it'll seem like more of a big deal when we're in the same place.

It might also not make much of a different, practically - most people that interact with her profesionally just call her "professor" (or sometimes "doctor"), and most other people just call her by her first name. So I guess it's only really for those times when you are filling out forms, or at the DMV or whatever.

Link Posted: 8/14/2005 6:52:50 PM EDT
I still think women should take their husband's last name. If my wife hadn't I wouldn't have married her. IOW kick her to the curb.

I am HALF serious.
Link Posted: 8/14/2005 6:58:35 PM EDT
I voted Mrs., but aren't you both Dr.'s? BTW,Danmark rules!!!!!
Link Posted: 8/14/2005 6:59:50 PM EDT
Link Posted: 8/14/2005 7:00:30 PM EDT

Originally Posted By DK-Prof:
That's a good point - if we wanted to change her name, I guess there would be nothing stopping her from still publishing under her old name (or even with a hyphenated version to avoid confusion).

I remember that she asked me if I wanted her to change it, but I really didn't care - it's not like she is desperately wanting to NOT change her name, and so neither of us see it as a big deal - especially since we're not having any kids. I guess it's particulalry unimportant when we live and work in separate states - maybe it'll seem like more of a big deal when we're in the same place.

It might also not make much of a different, practically - most people that interact with her profesionally just call her "professor" (or sometimes "doctor"), and most other people just call her by her first name. So I guess it's only really for those times when you are filling out forms, or at the DMV or whatever.




I would use Dr. in her situation. If she did not hold a doctorate, then Ms..

She's a classic case of where it is an advantage to keep her own name...as she has established a reputation under her name and might dilute the reputation or create complications if she changed.

My wife, in her mid-20s when we married, chose to hypenate, which I supported. The "take my name" think was much more important to me years ago than it is now, and the compromise was fine with me. I'd have married her either way!
Link Posted: 8/14/2005 7:14:11 PM EDT
Dr. professionally


Mrs DKProf, personally/socially, IMO


Link Posted: 8/14/2005 7:17:07 PM EDT

Originally Posted By DK-Prof:


My wife (the former Miss XXXX) is not planning on changing her last name, so what would her prefix/title be?



The ex-Mrs Dk-Prof.

SGatr15
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