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Posted: 8/15/2007 10:27:55 AM EDT
[Last Edit: 8/15/2007 10:29:23 AM EDT by Beltfedleadhead]
I was mowing the lawn the other day when I approached an old stump that I had been meaning to remove for some time.

Suddenly my legs began to burn as four or five bees had their way with my milky white calves.

I *ahem* urgently egressed the area while emitting a high-pitched, involuntary warning tone to others who may have been nearby.

I have since determined that the heretofore undiscovered nest needs to leave in as rapid and violent a manner possible.

I have at my disposal:

Six bottles of Tannerite

Three gallons of gasoline

RAID long-range stand-off style wasp killer

Pointed sticks

A rock: M-1 designation, Gray, 8 lb. Granite. NSN: 5312-27234-2121-D

A hammock

5lb sledge

17 assorted firearms


Any suggestions?

Link Posted: 8/15/2007 10:29:13 AM EDT
Any idea what type of bees?
Link Posted: 8/15/2007 10:29:15 AM EDT
[Last Edit: 8/15/2007 10:29:44 AM EDT by LOW2000]
Link Posted: 8/15/2007 10:29:55 AM EDT

Take it on at night. They can't see in the dark.
Link Posted: 8/15/2007 10:30:19 AM EDT
With extreme prejudice?

Chemical warfare is the way to go. I assume you have access to bleach and ammonia?


Also, gasoline is more fun when mixed with Styrofoam to create napalm.
Link Posted: 8/15/2007 10:33:23 AM EDT
You know what to do.......fire is the only way to be sure.
Link Posted: 8/15/2007 10:34:40 AM EDT
must involve copious amounts of gasoline

you get points if you can work a firearm in but a good flare will add bonus points also

is there any possibility that you could find the time to take some pictures and post them after the carnage?
Link Posted: 8/15/2007 10:34:51 AM EDT
[Last Edit: 8/15/2007 10:38:35 AM EDT by jrkarp]
Distance to neighbors?

ETA: If you want chemical warfare, ordinary organophosphate insecticides are actually the same kind of chemicals found in nerve gas. Look at the front of a can of RAID and see how small the percentage of active ingredient is.
Link Posted: 8/15/2007 10:36:10 AM EDT
Like Low2000 said...



If that's not going to work, is there a way to combine the tannerite and gasoline?

_MaH
Link Posted: 8/15/2007 10:37:45 AM EDT
Step 1. Tannerite. Video tape this as well please!

Step 2. Gasoline. Video optional.
Link Posted: 8/15/2007 10:43:30 AM EDT
Link Posted: 8/15/2007 10:43:32 AM EDT
[Last Edit: 8/15/2007 11:07:23 AM EDT by FordGuy]
Hey junior hold on a sec...get a good ID on them first...if yellowjackets, kill at will, if honeybees, why not call a beekeeper? Do you know how beneficial honeybees are? If you absolutely MUST kill them, just go out there at night with one of those headlamps on and squirt them with a little 409.
Link Posted: 8/15/2007 10:48:27 AM EDT
[Last Edit: 8/15/2007 10:50:55 AM EDT by Tacberry]

Originally Posted By Beltfedleadhead:
I was mowing the lawn the other day when I approached an old stump that I had been meaning to remove for some time.

Suddenly my legs began to burn as four or five bees had their way with my milky white calves.

I *ahem* urgently egressed the area while emitting a high-pitched, involuntary warning tone to others who may have been nearby.

I have since determined that the heretofore undiscovered nest needs to leave in as rapid and violent a manner possible.

I have at my disposal:

Six bottles of Tannerite

Three gallons of gasoline

RAID long-range stand-off style wasp killer

Pointed sticks

A rock: M-1 designation, Gray, 8 lb. Granite. NSN: 5312-27234-2121-D

A hammock

5lb sledge

17 assorted firearms


Any suggestions?



After thinking this through I believe you should do the following:

In the middle of the night sneak up to the stump and place the tannerite against the far side of the stump and the gasoline can sitting on top of the stump. Suspend the rock in the hammock, directly over the raid can, which will be on the wasp nest side of the stump.

Shoot the tannerite from afar. The explosion should rupture the gas can and ignite the gas. The heat and flame from the burning gas/stump should cause the hammock to release the rock, dropping it directly on the can of raid. The toxic clould/fire/concussion/crushing weight of the rock should kill a majority of the bees. Rush upon the survivors with your sledge hammer.

You will be a hero.


I will hold your beer. Edit to add: And video camera


Dibs on your surviving guns.
Link Posted: 8/15/2007 10:48:45 AM EDT
WHAT KIND OF BEES???

If they are honey bees, call a beekeeper. They'll come and get them.

Wasps, yellow jackets, hornets, etc let fly the dogs of hell!
Link Posted: 8/15/2007 10:51:05 AM EDT
rag, axe handle, kerosene, lighter, and bee spray are all you need.

You should be able to figure out how to use them.
Link Posted: 8/15/2007 10:52:42 AM EDT
[Last Edit: 8/15/2007 10:53:06 AM EDT by DragoMuseveni]
Break or carb cleaner.
Link Posted: 8/15/2007 10:56:10 AM EDT
I just found a small (3" diameter) hornet's nest hanging from my house yesterday. Will brake or carb cleaner work for me too? I've got aluminum siding, so I'm worried about whatever I use messing that up.

Kharn
Link Posted: 8/15/2007 10:57:29 AM EDT
tannerite

and video camera

its for the children
Link Posted: 8/15/2007 10:59:00 AM EDT

Originally Posted By FordGuy:
If you absolutely MUST kill them, just go out there at night with one of those headlamps on and squirt them with a little 409.


What fun would that be???
Link Posted: 8/15/2007 11:02:09 AM EDT
[Last Edit: 8/15/2007 11:03:41 AM EDT by Sturmwehr]
Tannerite.

And, btw, don't forget to videotape it.
Link Posted: 8/15/2007 11:06:00 AM EDT
Gasoline and tannerite.
yeah.
Link Posted: 8/15/2007 11:08:12 AM EDT
[Last Edit: 8/15/2007 11:08:42 AM EDT by macman37]

Originally Posted By FordGuy:
Hey junior hold on a sec...get a good ID on them first...if yellowjackets, kill at will, if honeybees, why not call a beekeeper? Do you know how beneficial honeybees are? If you absolutely MUST kill them, just go out there at night with one of those headlamps on and squirt them with a little 409.


+1

edit: voted for "Stoning, Iranian heretic style" because that has some pizzazz to it.
Link Posted: 8/15/2007 11:08:29 AM EDT
Link Posted: 8/15/2007 11:09:54 AM EDT

Originally Posted By jnojr:

Originally Posted By FordGuy:
If you absolutely MUST kill them, just go out there at night with one of those headlamps on and squirt them with a little 409.


What fun would that be???


you have NO idea....
Link Posted: 8/15/2007 11:10:19 AM EDT

Originally Posted By scrum:
WHAT KIND OF BEES???

If they are honey bees, call a beekeeper. They'll come and get them.

Wasps, yellow jackets, hornets, etc let fly the dogs of hell!


What he said. A beekeeper will gladly come out and take them off your hands if they produce honey. To kill honeybees would be a waste.
Link Posted: 8/15/2007 11:11:10 AM EDT
Just out of curiosity, would it be legal to shoot a can of RAID? If so, would that do anything?
Link Posted: 8/15/2007 11:11:35 AM EDT
How about some WD-40 and a lighter?
Link Posted: 8/15/2007 11:11:40 AM EDT

Originally Posted By scrum:
WHAT KIND OF BEES???

If they are honey bees, call a beekeeper. They'll come and get them.


I'd say leave them alone. Honeybees don't bother anyone.


Wasps, yellow jackets, hornets, etc let fly the dogs of hell!


Yes, but only use RAID or Ortho long-range stand-off style wasp killer. Anything else will likely get you stung or make you have to stay in the house from all the swarming angry hornets/wasps. Ask me how I know....


The stand-off insecticide hits them like Tabun or Sarin! An entire nest dead in three seconds!
Link Posted: 8/15/2007 11:13:36 AM EDT

Originally Posted By Beltfedleadhead:
I was mowing the lawn the other day when I approached an old stump that I had been meaning to remove for some time.

Suddenly my legs began to burn as four or five bees had their way with my milky white calves.

I *ahem* urgently egressed the area while emitting a high-pitched, involuntary warning tone to others who may have been nearby.

I have since determined that the heretofore undiscovered nest needs to leave in as rapid and violent a manner possible.

I have at my disposal:

Six bottles of Tannerite

Three gallons of gasoline

RAID long-range stand-off style wasp killer

Pointed sticks

A rock: M-1 designation, Gray, 8 lb. Granite. NSN: 5312-27234-2121-D


FUCK AROCK!

A hammock

5lb sledge

17 assorted firearms


Any suggestions?




i VOTED TANNERITE


bRYAN
Link Posted: 8/15/2007 11:14:46 AM EDT
[Last Edit: 8/15/2007 11:16:26 AM EDT by Essayons]
All of the above.

Cover the area with plastic and pump in insecticide. Then demo the stump and general AO with tannerite, buckets of gasoline and gunfire. Then throw the rock in the scorched hole.

Seriously, though, if they are honey bees please have a beekeeper come and get them. Bees are having enough problems without ARFCOM terminating them with extreme prejudice. If they are wasps or hornets, OTOH, then game on!
Link Posted: 8/15/2007 11:15:09 AM EDT
icepick
Link Posted: 8/15/2007 11:17:09 AM EDT

Originally Posted By jnojr:
How to get rid of bees


That guy is a moron....
Link Posted: 8/15/2007 11:18:10 AM EDT

Originally Posted By 95thFoot:
Yes, but only use RAID or Ortho long-range stand-off style wasp killer. Anything else will likely get you stung


Well, that's why I asked about shooting a can of RAID. I don't know the legality of that nor if it would be effective.

The redneck inside of me wants to say "HELL YES! Hold mah beer!"
The rationalist inside me is thinking "Tannerite."
My brain is telling me everything short of NBCs.
Link Posted: 8/15/2007 11:22:46 AM EDT
[Last Edit: 8/15/2007 11:23:24 AM EDT by Hawkeye]
Link Posted: 8/15/2007 11:29:05 AM EDT

Originally Posted By Hawkeye:
You people do understand that wasps, hornets, yellow jackets, etc., are NOT bees dont you? They are two seperate families. There are Bees, and then there are Wasps (hornets, yellow jackets, etc...). Just for clarification.

If you have wasps, destroy at will.

If you have bees, then PLEASE call a beekeeper to come get them. They are far to valuable to destroy.


Calling TBK!....calling TBK1...........



Link Posted: 8/15/2007 11:30:00 AM EDT
Link Posted: 8/15/2007 11:35:40 AM EDT

Originally Posted By Sturmwehr:

Originally Posted By 95thFoot:
Yes, but only use RAID or Ortho long-range stand-off style wasp killer. Anything else will likely get you stung


Well, that's why I asked about shooting a can of RAID. I don't know the legality of that nor if it would be effective.

The redneck inside of me wants to say "HELL YES! Hold mah beer!"
The rationalist inside me is thinking "Tannerite."
My brain is telling me everything short of NBCs.


Link Posted: 8/15/2007 11:35:53 AM EDT
Link Posted: 8/15/2007 11:38:58 AM EDT

Originally Posted By dneal33:
icepick


So you're saying to shoot them with .223?
Link Posted: 8/15/2007 11:39:10 AM EDT
[Last Edit: 8/15/2007 11:39:59 AM EDT by Sturmwehr]

Originally Posted By 95thFoot:



What? Like I said, I don't know the legality of it, but tannerite is just as unsafe. Tannerite can throw debris big and fast enough to hurt you.

EDIT: There was one guy here that used tannerite to try and clear a stump. A piece blew off and was lodged into the siding of his house.
Link Posted: 8/15/2007 11:46:00 AM EDT

Originally Posted By Hawkeye:
You people do understand that wasps, hornets, yellow jackets, etc., are NOT bees dont you? They are two seperate families. There are Bees, and then there are Wasps (hornets, yellow jackets, etc...). Just for clarification.

If you have wasps, destroy at will.

If you have bees, then PLEASE call a beekeeper to come get them. They are far to valuable to destroy.


Calling TBK!....calling TBK1...........


+1

If they are wasps, the only correct answer involves tannerite, gasoline and firearms. What I'm trying to say it, your poll is flawed
Link Posted: 8/15/2007 12:46:12 PM EDT
Assuming the hostiles are perfidious wasps:

Link Posted: 8/15/2007 12:50:06 PM EDT
Kill it with fire
Link Posted: 8/15/2007 12:52:25 PM EDT
Link Posted: 8/15/2007 1:58:29 PM EDT

Originally Posted By Torf:
www.unifac.com/altorfer/tannerite_hornets.jpg
VIDEO



How did he get it up there? And did it kill all of them immediately? (I sure hope it did!)
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