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9/22/2017 12:11:25 AM
Posted: 9/3/2005 8:21:24 AM EDT
The chick with a dick thread reminded me of a story. When I was in college, there is this place called Charlies Place and it had all these tables and chairs out on the sidewalk in the summer. They had it fenced off but you could see the people. I saw the most beautiful girl on campus having a beer with her girlfriends. I was mesmerized and couldnt take my eyes off her. Then WHAP! I walked right into a street sign. I instinctively back off and back right into a steel support cable for a telephone pole. My buddies who were already at the table, just busted out laughing! I mean they were rolling on the concrete. I didnt get hurt too bad, but my pride was mortally wounded.
Link Posted: 9/3/2005 8:53:14 AM EDT
Can't count the times I've almost bumped the car in front of me while checking out a hot girl...
Link Posted: 9/3/2005 8:57:46 AM EDT

Originally Posted By ARDOC:
chick with a dick thread



Excuse me? We have shemale threads here?

It's getting worse than I thought.



Link Posted: 9/3/2005 8:58:15 AM EDT
Walked into one of those bookstore ladders and knocked myself on my ass. I got a number though.
Link Posted: 9/3/2005 9:05:37 AM EDT
Yeah. I married her
Link Posted: 9/3/2005 9:08:19 AM EDT

Originally Posted By sydney7629:
Yeah. I married her

I stubbed my toe when I walked into the couch while staring at my wife's sexy butt. Live the American dream boys, marry above your league.
Link Posted: 9/3/2005 9:12:38 AM EDT
[Last Edit: 9/3/2005 9:13:24 AM EDT by AR10-A2]
Yeah, when my "current" noticed me checking one out ...
Link Posted: 9/3/2005 9:14:10 AM EDT

Originally Posted By AR10-A2:
Yeah, when my "current" noticed me checking one out ...



+1000
Link Posted: 9/3/2005 9:18:37 AM EDT

Originally Posted By AR10-A2:
Yeah, when my "current" noticed me checking one out ...

Did she pinch you in the arm or tug at your leg hair?
Link Posted: 9/3/2005 9:19:21 AM EDT
Link Posted: 9/3/2005 9:22:08 AM EDT

Originally Posted By AR10-A2:
Yeah, when my "current" noticed me checking one out ...



I forgot about that angle. You have to get so good that your head doesnt turn but your eyes do. That way you can always deny the obvious. Or pretend to be looking at something else and still scope out the chick. The things men have to do to survive.
Link Posted: 9/3/2005 9:25:30 AM EDT
Had my head turned around checking out a chick once while driving and had to slam on my brakes when I noticed the car in front of me stopped.
Link Posted: 9/3/2005 3:19:28 PM EDT
A few years ago, I was walking with a group of co-workers. This one really hot chick was walking in front of me, and I couldn't help scoping out her sweet tail section. I didn't notice the curb, and fell flat on my face. She didn't bust me, but my buddy knew what happened and was laughing his ass off.
Link Posted: 9/3/2005 3:22:09 PM EDT

Originally Posted By Justa_TXguy:

Originally Posted By ARDOC:
chick with a dick thread



Excuse me? We have shemale threads here?

It's getting worse than I thought.







And they promised me GD would get better after summer was over.
Link Posted: 9/3/2005 7:34:21 PM EDT
While in college... I was checking out a girl while a friend and I were biking, I was looking at her and she was looking at me... I fell off my bike, I was gushing blood.
It was pretty funny.
Link Posted: 9/3/2005 7:37:04 PM EDT
I was weed whacking the yard with the trimmer and a beautiful woman jogged buy. I cannot describe her beauty. Anyway as I watched her approach I nailed my foot and ankle with the trimmer. I had to pretend nothing happened as she made her way past me. As soon as she was out of sight, I ran into the house bleeding and whimpering like a wounded dog.
Link Posted: 9/4/2005 9:57:37 AM EDT
A long, long time ago I rolled an Ag Cat up into a ball while ogling a stunning South Dakota cheerleader who was flagging.

The plane owner didn't even fire my ass because he'd once done pretty much the same thing.
Link Posted: 9/4/2005 10:10:40 AM EDT

Originally Posted By KlubMarcus:

Originally Posted By AR10-A2:
Yeah, when my "current" noticed me checking one out ...

Did she pinch you in the arm or tug at your leg hair?



Oh no, much worse. Most often I got "The Look", and then... nothing that night.

Generally the next day - make up for lost time
Link Posted: 9/4/2005 10:29:48 AM EDT

Originally Posted By ARDOC:
chick with a dick



No such thing.

Those are dudes with boobs.
Link Posted: 9/4/2005 10:31:44 AM EDT

Originally Posted By WildBoar:
I was weed whacking the yard with the trimmer and a beautiful woman jogged buy. I cannot describe her beauty. Anyway as I watched her approach I nailed my foot and ankle with the trimmer. I had to pretend nothing happened as she made her way past me. As soon as she was out of sight, I ran into the house bleeding and whimpering like a wounded dog.



Real Men wear BOOTS.
Link Posted: 9/4/2005 10:32:47 AM EDT

Originally Posted By GunnFixr:

Originally Posted By ARDOC:
chick with a dick



No such thing.

Those are dudes with boobs.



Link Posted: 9/4/2005 10:33:29 AM EDT
I rear ended a woman in her 50's and her 80 year old mother as they sat at a red light while trying to scope out some hot college chicks in bikini's doing a car wash. It sucked big time.

No one was hurt, I locked up the brakes and just barely tapped the other car, did about 1400 dollars worth of damage to there car and none to mine. Made my insurance go up.
Link Posted: 9/4/2005 10:33:55 AM EDT
[Last Edit: 9/4/2005 10:34:56 AM EDT by KlubMarcus]

Originally Posted By AR10-A2:
Oh no, much worse. Most often I got "The Look", and then... nothing that night.

Ah, withdrawl symptoms. She cut you off from her supply of vitamins.
Link Posted: 9/4/2005 10:37:45 AM EDT
Almost but not quite . Now I've almost hurt other guys who "LOOK" at my daughter .
Link Posted: 9/4/2005 10:38:55 AM EDT
Patty
Link Posted: 9/4/2005 10:43:00 AM EDT
This wasn't really an injury, but I damaged by pride pretty good.

I quit my job working for an armored car company so I could go to school full time, and took a part time job in a liquor store.

Today, I had the farts...big time. I had just shat my pants with a real growler. A fart that lasted a good 15 seconds and changed octave three times. I'm not entirely sure, but there may have been lumps. Generally speaking, folks enjoy their own brand, but these had been making me gag all morning. No sooner than I had finished issuing forth my latest nasal assault, the hottest girl I've ever seen slinked through the door one hip at a time.

When she came in, the stench was still at ass level and she didn't get a whiff. She made her selections and was walking to the counter with the sexiest smile I've ever seen, and said "Hi, there" with a voice that sounded like honey. The smile quickly vanished, and her nose wrinkled, and I'm pretty sure she gagged a bit, and might have even thrown up in her mouth a little.

I had no escape, I couldn't run away, and I had no dog upon which to lay blame. I wanted to crawl under the cash register. Usually when the hot girls come in, I fumble a little with the cash register to keep them there a little longer, but I rang up her order and got her out as fast as I could.

After she was gone, I realized I've never seen her before, and probably will never see her again, so there wasn't much use to being too embarrassed about it, and spent the next 15 minutes laughing at myself...out loud. The next few customers gave me "odd" looks.
Link Posted: 9/4/2005 10:51:47 AM EDT
I've walked into various things, but never fallen down.

Going to a Catholic High school, I got really good at.....oggling without getting caught. In my 2nd year of college, I've just gotten better

God truely had a hand in designing the stairwells at my high school

WIZZO
Link Posted: 9/4/2005 11:07:39 AM EDT
I walked into a open door once .............12 sitches
Link Posted: 9/4/2005 11:38:29 AM EDT
At my high school, we had a big pool and swimming was a required PE course. I was walking next to the pool when I saw a girl who looked pretty enticing in her bathing suit. After a few seconds of watching her, I fell into the pool.
Link Posted: 9/4/2005 12:06:07 PM EDT

Originally Posted By GunnFixr:
I had no escape, I couldn't run away, and I had no dog upon which to lay blame. I wanted to crawl under the cash register. Usually when the hot girls come in, I fumble a little with the cash register to keep them there a little longer, but I rang up her order and got her out as fast as I could.

A classic!
Link Posted: 9/4/2005 12:12:05 PM EDT
wish I had a picture, but this was in the days before cameras on cell phones. We have a hot beach right by the Blvd, The local PD is cruising and checking out chicks and runs his patrol car right up under a boat on trailer in front of him. Prop right into the front window. It was awesome.
Link Posted: 9/4/2005 12:15:59 PM EDT
In college, riding a my bike to class, checking out a girl across the street, my handle bar caught cliped a parking meeter=road rash of the face and arms. And the girl turned out to have a butterface
Link Posted: 9/4/2005 12:16:22 PM EDT

I once was chili dippin down Kensington High St in London, walked into a light pole while
scopin a fine Irish lass across the road. Unfortunately, my buddies made such an uproar laffin thier asses off, she just shook her head and walked away.


DaddyDett

Link Posted: 9/4/2005 12:17:57 PM EDT
Im like 18 yrs old driving my Ford Fiesta...remember those? Not Festiva, but Fiesta...the German Ford import from 1978-1980....Sorry, Fiesta owners are sensetive!

Im with my girlfriend at the time and I see this beautiful blond walking along the road and I start staring while driving along. After just a couple milli-seconds my girlfriend screams, "ERIC!!!". I look around there is a car STOPPED directly in front of me turning left into a parking lot. I whip the wheel sooo hard the little 1800 lb Fiesta goes up on two wheels as I veer around this turning car. I must have missed the other vehicle by 12-15" while at 40-45 mph.

I bounce off the curb, crack my alloy rim, BARELY get the car back under control and pull onto the next sidestreet. She asks, "WHAT THE HELL WERE YOU LOOKING AT!!!!?????" I never had the nerve to tell her......WHEW! Was my heart beating!
Link Posted: 9/4/2005 12:20:06 PM EDT
This happened a long time ago (like middle school long ago)...

I was riding my bike with a friend around the neighborhood when I spotted an attractive girl. My head was turned to the left trying to watch for as long as possible when all of a sudden... SMACK! I had ridden my back straight into the back of a huge parked van. Took probably five minutes to regain my equilibrium and gather up my broken pride to finish my ride.
Link Posted: 9/4/2005 12:32:45 PM EDT
Had an "ALMOST" happen many moons ago while riding my 1st motorcycle a Honda 350cc.... Saw the most beautiful girl this 18 year old had ever seen and almost put my bike right up a Ford pick up trucks ass... it was as close as you can get without wrecking....but she was a doll...she was so good looking I remember exactly what she looked like to this day 32 years later..... only other girl I can remember being THAT good looking was from my old cable job and that was 25 years ago.... seen many good looking women since those days but those 2 just stand out above all the rest..
Link Posted: 9/4/2005 12:38:23 PM EDT
walked into a "open" door and busted my glasses in midddle school checking out this girl i liked at the time.
Link Posted: 9/4/2005 12:52:52 PM EDT
I crashed a car when I saw a woman walking down the street with a bra and no top on....

<­BR>

Neverm­ind...that was a Seinfeld episode...
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