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1/25/2018 7:38:29 AM
Posted: 6/23/2003 2:12:46 PM EST
I have a Bro-in-Law in one and a cousin in another. Guess which one sent this. Subject: FW: Rabbit Hunt: LAPD, LASD, FBI AND THE CIA > > > Rabbit Hunt: LAPD, LASD, FBI AND THE CIA > The LAPD, LASD, FBI And The CIA are all trying to prove that they are the best at apprehending criminals. The president decides to give them a test. > He releases a rabbit into a forest and each of them has to catch it. > > The CIA goes in. They place animal informants throughout the forest. They question all plant and mineral witnesses. After three months of extensive investigations they conclude that rabbits do not exist. > > The FBI goes in. After two weeks with no leads they burn the forest, killing everything in it, including the rabbit and they make no apologies. > The rabbit had it coming. > > The LAPD goes in. They come out two hours later with a badly beaten bear. > The bear is yelling "OKAY!" "OKAY!!" I'M A RABBIT, I'M A RABBIT!!! > > The LASD goes in. The administration, learning that deputies are in the woods looking for a rabbit, makes the deputies wear orange vests for safety. They make announcements every 5 minutes so as to not surprise the rabbit and to let all other forest creatures know their business. They then insist that the rabbit be caught in a non-violent, not confrontational manner, being mindful of it's feelings at all times. > Briefings are developed and directives published on proper rabbit catching techniques with forms to be filled out by any deputy involved in the rabbit operation. Those deputies that actually see the rabbit are de-briefed and re-assigned, so as not to unduly influence the objectivity of the search for the alleged rabbit. Supervisors are tasked to be on scene at any rabbit apprehension, and conduct an investigation of the incident to ensure that the rabbit's rights were not violated. Eventually the rabbit is captured. The bear makes an anonymous 3rd party complaint that excessive force was used and deputies are found to be in violation of policy and procedures, the deputies are disciplined. The rabbit, which is represented by PETA, sues and wins a multi-million dollar judgement. As part of the settlement, rabbit sensitivity training is mandated for all department members. Department executives issue directives that prohibit any further rabbit operations, in order to reduce departmental liability. >
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