My county Sheriff's office paperwork for submitting a Form 4.
The answers I wanted to put.

Internal Affairs
Questions for Investigation of ATF Form 4 Transferor Requests

1. Do you have any criminal history in your background?
I think my family lynched a few people back in the good ol'days.

2. Do you have any mental health history in your background?
My dog told me to tell you to shut the hell up and not to answer this question.

3. Have you been in the military? If Yes, then type of discharge?
In college I played more hours of Counter Strike than I did in the classroom.  Discharges were often and always while alone.

4. What is your citizenship status?
I was born here.  Were you?

5. Are you or have you ever been part of a militant organization?
The Cub Scouts.  ARFCOM. The International House of Pancakes

6. Do you currently or have you ever had a substance abuse problem?
I can stop any time I want to bitch.

7. Have you ever had any domestic violence in your history or had a protective order issued?
One was issued, but it was removed the next day when they found her body.

8. What type of security do you have in your home for your weapons?
Bullets

9. Do you have a security system for your home?
See number 8.

10. Are there any children in your home?
The dog?

11. What is your profession?
Does post whore count?  The silencer is for my new endevors.

A friend of mine once told me, that when asked at a Border Patrol checkpoint: "were you born in this country?", his reply was:  "Yes, were you???"

Hah hah.

Ha ha ha ha he spent the next six hours watching them tear his truck apart and the next six after that putting it back together himself.

Needless to say, he now just answers a simple "yes".

Ask a stupid question, get a stupid answer.

mjohn3006 seems to be on a role with funny threads this week... First the "how to park" thread now this!

Quoted: My county Sheriff's office paperwork for submitting a Form 4. The answers I wanted to put. Internal Affairs Questions for Investigation of ATF Form 4 Transferor Requests 3. Have you been in the military? If Yes, then type of discharge? In college I played more hours of Counter Strike than I did in the classroom.  Discharges were often and always while alone.

At this I laughed the laugh of one who has been there and done that

Quoted: A friend of mine once told me, that when asked at a Border Patrol checkpoint: "were you born in this country?", his reply was:  "Yes, were you???" Hah hah. Ha ha ha ha he spent the next six hours watching them tear his truck apart and the next six after that putting it back together himself. Needless to say, he now just answers a simple "yes".

Similar experience.
At the customs, I was asked "Do you have any illegal drugs, explosives, weapons with you?"
"No. Has anybody been stupid enough to answer yes?"
I and my luggage then are subjected to a throughout search
They even found a pocket on my suitcase that I didn't know that I had.

Quoted: Quoted: A friend of mine once told me, that when asked at a Border Patrol checkpoint: "were you born in this country?", his reply was:  "Yes, were you???" Hah hah. Ha ha ha ha he spent the next six hours watching them tear his truck apart and the next six after that putting it back together himself. Needless to say, he now just answers a simple "yes". Similar experience. At the customs, I was asked "Do you have any illegal drugs, explosives, weapons with you?" "No. Has anybody been stupid enough to answer yes?" I and my luggage then are subjected to a throughout search They even found a pocket on my suitcase that I didn't know that I had.

You're lucky they didn't try to search pockets you didn't know YOU had.

Internal Affairs
Questions for Investigation of ATF Form 4 Transferor Requests

1. Do you have any criminal history in your background?
I think my family lynched a few people back in the good ol'days

so your saying if we still had those days it would be good?

Quoted: Similar experience. At the customs, I was asked "Do you have any illegal drugs, explosives, weapons with you?" "No. Has anybody been stupid enough to answer yes?" I and my luggage then are subjected to a throughout search They even found a pocket on my suitcase that I didn't know that I had.

I wonder if they put questions like this on there knowing a smuggler is not going to consciously put yes down but maybe do it without thinking. Sort of a Freudian slip?

Quoted: Internal Affairs Questions for Investigation of ATF Form 4 Transferor Requests 1. Do you have any criminal history in your background? I think my family lynched a few people back in the good ol'days so your saying if we still had those days it would be good?

Um.  Okay.  Everything I said was a complete and total farse except for that one word which is obviously a cornerstone of my beliefs and personality.  I  should be castrated, quartered and drug around the town squar as an example that others may witness the devil that is me.  

In case I need to be more clear.  The above responce was sarcasim.

Do you need further clairification thet the entire post is meant to be a joke?


ETA.  I just realized where you might be coming from.  And just so you know, lynching was not even close to an exclusive black thing, and did not even cross my mind when writing the post.  If your mind immeadeatly went there, that is your problem.

heheh...


when i put in my form 1 for an SBR, CLEO said "you don't need that.... there's a minimum length for shotguns, but not rifles".

Needless to say, i got it signed anyway....

lol

Quoted: Internal Affairs Questions for Investigation of ATF Form 4 Transferor Requests 1. Do you have any criminal history in your background? I think my family lynched a few people back in the good ol'days so your saying if we still had those days it would be good?

"Lynching" means stealing someone from custody, not administering vigilante justice by hanging, etc.

Quoted: Quoted: Similar experience. At the customs, I was asked "Do you have any illegal drugs, explosives, weapons with you?" "No. Has anybody been stupid enough to answer yes?" I and my luggage then are subjected to a throughout search They even found a pocket on my suitcase that I didn't know that I had. I wonder if they put questions like this on there knowing a smuggler is not going to consciously put yes down but maybe do it without thinking. Sort of a Freudian slip?

I think that they want to see how one reacts to the question.
If the person looks uneasy, glances at his luggage, fumbles with the detonator, he is flagged for extra searching.

Quoted: 7. Have you ever had any domestic violence in your history or had a protective order issued? One was issued, but it was removed the next day when they found her body.

Border checker asked my wife if she was born in the U.S.  She said no, Alabama.  They waived her through

Quoted: Quoted: A friend of mine once told me, that when asked at a Border Patrol checkpoint: "were you born in this country?", his reply was:  "Yes, were you???" Hah hah. Ha ha ha ha he spent the next six hours watching them tear his truck apart and the next six after that putting it back together himself. Needless to say, he now just answers a simple "yes". Similar experience. At the customs, I was asked "Do you have any illegal drugs, explosives, weapons with you?" "No. Has anybody been stupid enough to answer yes?" I and my luggage then are subjected to a throughout search They even found a pocket on my suitcase that I didn't know that I had.

Glad I'm not the only one.

Back in college, I got pulled over in Nacogdoches, Texas, for going 47 in a 35.  Two cops, male and female.   I had all of my camera gear in the car - strobes, background paper, two camera bags, tripods, you name it.  While the male officer was writing the ticket, the female looked around the inside of my car, lokked my in the eye, and asked, "Are you a photographer?"

My mouth replied before my brain could kick in - "Yeah, are you a cop?"  

I got to sit on the curb and watch them go through all of my gear.  Young and dumb was a pretty good description of me that day.

Quoted: Border checker asked my wife if she was born in the U.S.  She said no, Alabama.  They waived her through