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Posted: 9/2/2010 3:45:28 PM EDT
[Last Edit: 9/8/2010 4:00:34 PM EDT by Cpt_Kirks]
Tomorrow morning I get the snip.

Supposed to be no needle, no scalpel.

Bring on the horror stories, but they all have to begin with "...this one time, at band camp..."

Link Posted: 9/2/2010 3:46:41 PM EDT
Uh, good luck with that.
Link Posted: 9/2/2010 3:50:11 PM EDT
[Last Edit: 9/2/2010 3:52:00 PM EDT by PETman]
Don't do what a coworker of mine did,drove his motorcycle!!!!!
Enjoy the weekend doing nothing.

Edit: Don't go and ride the lawn mower this weekend either. (my mistake )
Link Posted: 9/2/2010 3:51:23 PM EDT
On behalf of the entire species... thank you.
Link Posted: 9/2/2010 3:56:43 PM EDT
Originally Posted By DKing:
On behalf of the entire species... thank you.


Ha.

Too late. I already shit in the gene pool!

Link Posted: 9/2/2010 3:58:18 PM EDT

Originally Posted By Cpt_Kirks:
Tomorrow morning I get the snip.

Supposed to be no needle, no scalpel.

Bring on the horror stories, but they all have to begin with "...this one time, at band camp..."


?? What is he using? Scissors and a hammer?

I had mine done 12/31 (met last year's deductible).
Honestly, it was pretty horrible. Afterwards wasn't too bad, but the needlesticks and the cauterizing weren't 'pain free' as advertised.
If it hadn't worked I was ready to say screw it and stay fertile rather than go through it again.
I'm not a wuss either, have a pretty high tolerance for pain. Sorry, not trying to scare you OP...
Link Posted: 9/2/2010 4:00:07 PM EDT
Better you than me.
Link Posted: 9/2/2010 4:03:35 PM EDT
[Last Edit: 9/2/2010 4:03:59 PM EDT by VoodooChile]
Shave yourself ahead of time..

make sure you have the frozen peas ready
Link Posted: 9/2/2010 4:04:34 PM EDT






Link Posted: 9/2/2010 4:05:50 PM EDT
Have fun.

Vasectomy is like a golden ticket at bars.
Link Posted: 9/2/2010 4:06:54 PM EDT
you'll never forget the burning smell when the cauterizing begins....
Link Posted: 9/2/2010 4:07:49 PM EDT
Originally Posted By ksmedman:

Originally Posted By Cpt_Kirks:
Tomorrow morning I get the snip.

Supposed to be no needle, no scalpel.

Bring on the horror stories, but they all have to begin with "...this one time, at band camp..."


?? What is he using? Scissors and a hammer?

I had mine done 12/31 (met last year's deductible).
Honestly, it was pretty horrible. Afterwards wasn't too bad, but the needlesticks and the cauterizing weren't 'pain free' as advertised.
If it hadn't worked I was ready to say screw it and stay fertile rather than go through it again.
I'm not a wuss either, have a pretty high tolerance for pain. Sorry, not trying to scare you OP...


Air gun to blow the numbing agent in, sharp hemostat (or whatever) to poke a little hole.

"...poke a little hole." In my sack. Ouch.

Link Posted: 9/2/2010 4:07:58 PM EDT
+100 on the frozen peas ....

I had the no needle, no scalpel method... Get movies and snacks ahead of time and do absolutely nothing.....I paid $650 cash to have mine done..


Son
Link Posted: 9/2/2010 4:08:50 PM EDT
Originally Posted By VoodooChile:
Shave yourself ahead of time..

make sure you have the frozen peas ready


I think these are documented requirements.

I had this done two years ago. Got 30 days of legal narcotics which I abused with beer over a long weekend while playing Left4Dead multiplayer on PC. I still have 3/4 of the narcotics left, they wound up making me itchy.

Plenty of frozen peas, ice packs, etc. will keep down the swelling.

Just take it easy for a few days. No golfing.

The worst is smelling the singe of your tubes, or maybe the poor nurse that has to come in and wipe down your junk with antiseptic.
Link Posted: 9/2/2010 4:09:34 PM EDT
Piece of cake, you will need the frozen bag of peas though.
Link Posted: 9/2/2010 4:17:04 PM EDT
Piece of cake.
Link Posted: 9/2/2010 4:17:34 PM EDT

Originally Posted By Cpt_Kirks:
Originally Posted By DKing:
On behalf of the entire species... thank you.


Ha.

Too late. I already shit in the gene pool!


Oh Well, it was worth a try!
Link Posted: 9/2/2010 4:20:31 PM EDT
How much can I drink tonight?

Link Posted: 9/2/2010 4:22:03 PM EDT
I shit you not I have a scar on my sack that looks like someone cut into it with a rusty, dull, axe................................and then theres the pain........hope this helps...
Link Posted: 9/2/2010 4:23:23 PM EDT
Originally Posted By Cpt_Kirks:
How much can I drink tonight?



Can or should?
Link Posted: 9/2/2010 4:24:17 PM EDT
whats a cobra without its venom?
Link Posted: 9/2/2010 4:25:06 PM EDT
If the doctor offers a shot of valium, take it. If not, ask for one.
You won't care what happens then.
Link Posted: 9/2/2010 4:25:43 PM EDT

Originally Posted By Riply21:
whats a cobra without its venom?

It's a snake that gets handled a whole lot more...





Link Posted: 9/2/2010 4:32:18 PM EDT
So you'll be Lt Sulu from now on?
Link Posted: 9/2/2010 4:33:40 PM EDT
he'll need to change it to capt_picard
Link Posted: 9/2/2010 4:34:08 PM EDT
Meh, your sons will mock you for getting your dick cut off. Other than that, no problems.

Assuming your family is like mine...
Link Posted: 9/2/2010 4:34:21 PM EDT

Originally Posted By DKing:
he'll need to change it to capt_picard

nice.
Link Posted: 9/2/2010 4:35:29 PM EDT
Hmm...no needle, no scalpel; that must mean the doc will use two pairs of needle-nose pliers, one set in each hand. Let us know how the ripping of flesh feels!

Link Posted: 9/2/2010 4:46:26 PM EDT
Gettin it done isn't bad, it's the reversal that's a bitch.
Link Posted: 9/2/2010 4:46:53 PM EDT
Originally Posted By Mxpatriot51:

Originally Posted By Riply21:
whats a cobra without its venom?

It's a snake that gets handled a whole lot more...










Link Posted: 9/2/2010 4:48:37 PM EDT
Originally Posted By fxntime:
So you'll be Lt Sulu from now on?


Oh, MY!

Link Posted: 9/2/2010 4:52:46 PM EDT
Originally Posted By DKing:
he'll need to change it to capt_picard


Link Posted: 9/2/2010 4:53:16 PM EDT
Got mine about 10 years ago. Money well spent.
Link Posted: 9/2/2010 4:57:34 PM EDT
[Last Edit: 9/2/2010 5:23:04 PM EDT by Hanzerik]
Originally Posted By Bill247:
Got mine about 10 years ago. Money well spent.


Me too.

If they tell you to keep them puppies supported by wearing a jock strap, don't be a dumbass and disregard that advice. The less they move around the better you will feel.
Link Posted: 9/2/2010 4:57:57 PM EDT
Got mine ...errrr This one time at band camp, the Nazi who was masquerading as a nut doctor told me their would be no pain after wards,(havin sex wise).

Dude, get the ear plugs for your ole lady , the first time you bust a cap in her after the appropriate waiting period.

The worst fuckin pain ever , I was curled up like a little girl after finding out her mom was bangin her boyfriend

It hurt so fucking bad, I held off the ole lady (ex now) for another 4 weeks after that.

that first shot is gonna be a doozy

Good luck
Link Posted: 9/2/2010 4:59:32 PM EDT
I had it done 20 years ago

Link Posted: 9/2/2010 5:02:29 PM EDT
[Last Edit: 9/2/2010 5:04:02 PM EDT by riggins]
Got mine December of 90. Nothing to it. The burning smell is not good as others have said.

Don't be a bad ass like my old boss and build fence the next day. It took him weeks to recover. Lie around and do nothing for the entire three day weekend you will be gtg.

Take in the two samples. My neighbor didn't and got a third son for his effort. Not a bad thing just not what they were expecting.

If your doc didn't tell you bring a jock with you and wear it..

ETA: corrected spelling.
Link Posted: 9/2/2010 5:02:41 PM EDT
[Last Edit: 9/2/2010 5:02:52 PM EDT by glazer1972]
Make sure that Son of B1+ch numbs both sides before he starts pulling.
Link Posted: 9/2/2010 5:03:33 PM EDT
Take EVERY painkiller they are willing to give you...both before and after. Tell 'em to give you something in advance that will numb you from the neck down.

My vasectomy in a nutshell: It hurt like hell, I passed out three times, and my nuts hurt for a long time afterward...despite following the docs instructions to the letter.

If it was something that had to be re-done every few years or so, I wouldn't do it.

Have fun tomorrow!
Link Posted: 9/2/2010 5:06:58 PM EDT
Hope you don't have any autoimmune problems afterward. I had mine in dec and by feb I was off work for 57 days ended up with knees and ankles swollen the size off softballs and lymps nodes in chest swelled also.took meds for 3 months and so far everything is ok.
Link Posted: 9/2/2010 5:08:26 PM EDT
Nope. Not going to take part in this one... I will hole out for no shave November
Link Posted: 9/2/2010 5:08:30 PM EDT
Been there done that. Afterwards the doctor told me they wouldn't have to change the seats on the operating table as I was so nervous that the only thing that touched the table was my heels and the back of my head. But really, nothing to it and well worth the inconvenience.
Link Posted: 9/2/2010 5:11:43 PM EDT
My cousin had it done and he is an anastiesiologist (sp).

He puked everywhere and said it really hurt.
Link Posted: 9/2/2010 5:12:29 PM EDT
Doc said jock or tightie whities.

They never mention Valium until this morning, I am going to take them up on it.

Will he give me Hydrocodone? I REALLY like hydros. Got some of them for a root canal last year.

Crap, I was going to brew beer and build some gear this weekend. Guess that's out.
I just kegged a batch, so I don't have to worry about that.

Link Posted: 9/2/2010 5:15:59 PM EDT
Originally Posted By Cpt_Kirks:
Tomorrow morning I get the snip.

Supposed to be no needle, no scalpel.

Bring on the horror stories, but they all have to begin with "...this one time, at band camp..."



When I was in med school, I remember a patient who had that procedure. He developed a horrible infection that ate away his testicles and penis.
Link Posted: 9/2/2010 5:17:13 PM EDT
Define Macho: Jogging home after a Vasectomy. I to have been thinking about having this done.
Link Posted: 9/2/2010 5:17:16 PM EDT

Originally Posted By C-4:
Originally Posted By Cpt_Kirks:
Tomorrow morning I get the snip.

Supposed to be no needle, no scalpel.

Bring on the horror stories, but they all have to begin with "...this one time, at band camp..."



When I was in med school, I remember a patient who had that procedure. He developed a horrible infection that ate away his testicles and penis.

But I'm sure it was an isolated incident.
Link Posted: 9/2/2010 5:20:32 PM EDT
Originally Posted By Mxpatriot51:

Originally Posted By Riply21:
whats a cobra without its venom?

It's a snake that gets handled a whole lot more...







The analogy fails in this case.
Link Posted: 9/2/2010 5:22:10 PM EDT
[Last Edit: 9/2/2010 5:24:18 PM EDT by ToeTag]
Mine was 16yrs ago. I can still smell the vasdeferans burning. The first 5 injections into the testicles was the worse. Afterwards, it felt like a dull tooth ache for a day or two. I had talked to an older gent who had it done. He told me about the results of his. He said "it feels the same, smells the same and according to his wife, it tasted the same". I told him mine didn't swallow so that didn't matter.....to her anyway.

My advice is grab every mirror in the house and shave your ball sack. If you don't or do it wrong, the nurse will do it for you but won't be as gentle as you would be on yourself. Oh yeah, get a bag of frozen corn or peas to help ease the pain afterwards.
Link Posted: 9/2/2010 5:32:03 PM EDT
Originally Posted By Pegasus6:

Originally Posted By C-4:
Originally Posted By Cpt_Kirks:
Tomorrow morning I get the snip.

Supposed to be no needle, no scalpel.

Bring on the horror stories, but they all have to begin with "...this one time, at band camp..."



When I was in med school, I remember a patient who had that procedure. He developed a horrible infection that ate away his testicles and penis.

But I'm sure it was an isolated incident.


Very rare. But when it happens . . . gone. They even put him in a hyperbaric oxygen chamber and did manage to save a small piece of the right scrotum.
Link Posted: 9/2/2010 5:39:02 PM EDT
I've said it before and I'll say it again:

Skip the pain meds and let the pain be your guide. My doc said I'd be back to my old routine within a few days. I believed him. I was on Vicodin, it didn't hurt, so I went and mowed the lawn and stuff. Ended up with a huge sperm granuloma - it was like I had 3 testicles and hurt like hell.

Take advantage of the opportunity to lay on the couch.
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