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Posted: 1/11/2015 10:00:41 PM EDT
[#1]
Nope.
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Posted: 1/11/2015 10:01:28 PM EDT
[#2]
I did something similar processing a deer last year. I encased my finger in super glue.
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Posted: 1/11/2015 10:01:40 PM EDT
[#3]
Never.
 OK, I lied, I dropped a broken pane of glass in my face back several years ago. Turns out one reason your nose sticks out is so it can absorb some stupidity instead of your eyes. |
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Posted: 1/11/2015 10:01:52 PM EDT
[#4]
I cut my finger dicing onions yesterday!
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Posted: 1/11/2015 10:01:59 PM EDT
[#5]
It doesn't seem dumb until I try it out.
Then it rapidly becomes evident. |
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Posted: 1/11/2015 10:02:14 PM EDT
[#6]
Every day I do something stupid.
Every. Fuckin. Day. 
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Posted: 1/11/2015 10:02:18 PM EDT
[#7]
Super glue and ice?
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Posted: 1/11/2015 10:02:23 PM EDT
[#8]
... "just the tip"?
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Posted: 1/11/2015 10:03:33 PM EDT
[#9]
Quoted:
Last night was my turn, slicing carrots on the Japanese mandolin. Yep, got the finger tip. I would say I skived the distal 1/16" plumb off. now I get to enjoy the pain. Nothing docs can do, not even sewing the flap on. No sense in wasting $500 at the ER. Thankfully I have some hydrocodone 7.5 mg Norcos so I am Greg House of the engineering world. I got married, VERY DUMB 
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Posted: 1/11/2015 10:03:53 PM EDT
[#10]
Yep, I've got the scars to prove it too. 
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Posted: 1/11/2015 10:04:22 PM EDT
[#11]
No.
I have never done anything dumb before. 
Okay, okay. So there WAS that car engine that I caught on fire once. But let's just not go there.
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Posted: 1/11/2015 10:05:29 PM EDT
[#12]
Quote HistoryQuoted: I got married, VERY DUMB Quote HistoryQuoted: Quoted: Last night was my turn, slicing carrots on the Japanese mandolin. Yep, got the finger tip. I would say I skived the distal 1/16" plumb off. now I get to enjoy the pain. Nothing docs can do, not even sewing the flap on. No sense in wasting $500 at the ER. Thankfully I have some hydrocodone 7.5 mg Norcos so I am Greg House of the engineering world. I got married, VERY DUMB |
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Posted: 1/11/2015 10:05:56 PM EDT
[#13]
post on here drunk
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Posted: 1/11/2015 10:06:48 PM EDT
[#14]
I won't say how, but I once jammed the whole blade from a utility knife into my left forearm. That hurt. 4 stitches.
When I was a small lad of about 4, I bought into that Mary Poppins shit. I climbed up onto my garage roof, and jumped off with an umbrella. Yes, I'm a special kind of stupid at times.
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Posted: 1/11/2015 10:09:52 PM EDT
[#15]
I took the tip of my index finger off with one a few weeks ago. I reckon there was an eighth inch of fingertip sitting on the table amongst the potato slices. Superglued the sumbitch back on and finished cooking dinner, minus the fried potatoes
It's mostly healed by now. This stuff 
works pretty well. Stings like a fothermucker when you slather it on. |
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Posted: 1/11/2015 10:10:25 PM EDT
[#16]
Quote HistoryQuoted: I married an ER RN. I only hurt myself when she is around. I need to see a shrink about that. She also doesn't like me taking the Norcos for the pain, I only take them at night and only one. They must learn that in college. My sister inlaw is a doc, real nice has patched me up on several occasions. When it comes to pain management she just tells me, "Take 3 Advil every four hours and if you quit doing stupid things it wouldn't hurt." |
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Posted: 1/11/2015 10:12:06 PM EDT
[#17]
I've done that. Went to the ER, waited for 6 hours until they got to me. They bandaged it up, didn't need pain meds as it only hurt when I touched it.
I threw the mandoline away when I got home. That was 3 years ago and it's all healed back. |
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Posted: 1/11/2015 10:13:22 PM EDT
[#18]
Quote HistoryQuoted: Yep, I've got the scars to prove it too. |
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Posted: 1/11/2015 10:14:24 PM EDT
[#19]
Melted my thumb to a hot bowl from the microwave. Melted. Melt. Ed.
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Posted: 1/11/2015 10:15:17 PM EDT
[#20]
pics
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Posted: 1/11/2015 10:16:35 PM EDT
[#21]
Yup...
It was fucking awesome |
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Posted: 1/11/2015 10:16:53 PM EDT
[#22]
Yup.....ND.
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Posted: 1/11/2015 10:16:56 PM EDT
[#23]
I do dumb stuff all the time. Hell, some times I even impress my self how dumb I can be.
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Posted: 1/11/2015 10:17:49 PM EDT
[#24]
Intentionally jumped off a motorcycle doing 150 +/- mph.
In hindsight, wasn't dumb at all, the bike went into a bad place. Everybody watching the mess said afterwards 'it was the right thing to do.' |
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Posted: 1/11/2015 10:18:28 PM EDT
[#25]
Yep
A couple times |
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Posted: 1/11/2015 10:19:25 PM EDT
[#26]
I stabbed an ESEE 5 into my forearm while caping out a buck. The ER staff is more surprised to see a guy show up with a self applied izzy than I would have thought. The nurses had never seen one. It was like magic.
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Posted: 1/11/2015 10:19:29 PM EDT
[#27]
You mean like when you're welding on the fireplace grate and you grab it with your bare hand to flip it over, thus burning the shit out of yourself?
And then doing the exact same thing five minutes later? No, never.
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Posted: 1/11/2015 10:22:26 PM EDT
[#28]
I've done lots of stupid stuff. Bicycles can be the most fun. There's nothing like a concrete slab rapidly approaching your face, to let you know that you fucked up a long time ago.
<-- Basically like that.
Machine tools can be great too. Especially when darwin taps me on the shoulder and says "Take a deeper cut next time, your part won't move." Yeah... right.... I've launched quite a bit of stuff across the room. Lots of cutters have been broken. But the upside is, now I know what "that sound" is on all of the machines I run at work. You know, that split second sound that lets you know you are walking on a very thin line. Like when shit is about to get very real, very fast and you have exactly 2 seconds to make up your mind and react. But hey, at least they don't have any blanchard grinders. One lathe at work throws work pieces with such accuracy, that you can predict which dicrection they will go, how high and far they will fly, and how far they will roll or bounce, all based on the RPM of the chuck. I think they need a new chuck, beacuse it doesn't grip for shit. The upside is, I usually know which way to duck. I sent one piece right over my right shoulder one day. I heard the whistle as it went by.
Forgetting to flip my welding hood down is always great. Now when I do it three times in a row.... It's time to clock out and go home. It's not like I have ever made any mistakes that were THAT dumb... 
I love that sound of tires leaving the pavement. I haven't had it happen in a few years, but it has a good way of making clean underwear dirty rather rapidly. |
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Posted: 1/11/2015 10:25:00 PM EDT
[#29]
Yep, too many to recount and frankly I don't care to revisit
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Posted: 1/11/2015 10:25:02 PM EDT
[#30]
I drilled through a Pinewood Derby car and into my hand with a 1/2" bit. I suppose that qualifies.
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Posted: 1/11/2015 10:25:43 PM EDT
[#31]
Yeah, I still have a numb fingertip because somehow in my fully equipped kitchen and stone sober I was undone by the challenge of opening a bag of coffee. Lessons learned: steak knives are not scissors, and surprisingly enough they're pretty good at cutting flesh.
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Posted: 1/11/2015 10:26:23 PM EDT
[#32]
I do almost everytime I post in GD.
 
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Posted: 1/11/2015 10:27:07 PM EDT
[#33]
Rode the mountain bike yesterday for a few hours. Broke one of my XTR shifters.
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Posted: 1/11/2015 10:27:21 PM EDT
[#34]
Quote HistoryQuoted:
I did something similar processing a deer last year. I encased my finger in super glue. SG is the answer |
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Posted: 1/11/2015 10:28:49 PM EDT
[#35]
I do stupid shit like that all the time. Last summer on the first day of our Yellowstone vacation I damn near sliced the pad of my left index finger off opening a packet of hotel room coffee with my pocket knife. Wrapped it in a non stick pad, gauze and tape and went on with the vacation. Could have used a few stitches but I wasn't going to burn the time to go get it sewn up. One time at the shop I cut a u-joint out with a torch. Instead of using pliers or something to grab the hot cross of the joint to get it off the table so some dumbass didn't walk by and burn themselves with it I just grabbed it up. Didn't take me long to let go of it either. And don't weld near the pile of oily rags either. |
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Posted: 1/11/2015 10:29:46 PM EDT
[#36]
Quote HistoryQuoted:
I married an ER RN. I only hurt myself when she is around. I need to see a shrink about that. She also doesn't like me taking the Norcos for the pain, I only take them at night and only one. Quote HistoryQuoted:
Quoted:
Quoted:
Last night was my turn, slicing carrots on the Japanese mandolin. Yep, got the finger tip. I would say I skived the distal 1/16" plumb off. now I get to enjoy the pain. Nothing docs can do, not even sewing the flap on. No sense in wasting $500 at the ER. Thankfully I have some hydrocodone 7.5 mg Norcos so I am Greg House of the engineering world. I got married, VERY DUMB See if she can get you some DuoDERM. Change it every few days and it will heal up nicely. |
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Posted: 1/11/2015 10:30:47 PM EDT
[#37]
Over the years I've always had good luck duct taping flaps of skin back
in place while it was still bleeding and leave it alone for a few days. I might be a lucky "good healer" but most of the time it doesn't even leave a scar. Not kidding...your results may vary.
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Posted: 1/11/2015 10:35:03 PM EDT
[#38]
Putting new porch rail up. 10 years ago. Welded the main portion, put an oak cap on it. Wanted to curve the ends to match the columns. Got my Porta-band saw out and started cutting in my hands over my leg. The blade bound in the wood and flipped it over in a flash. I cut the tip of my left middle finger off at the edge of the bone. The worst pain was the shot in each side of the finger at the hand to numb. It was unbearable. Then the pain for days and days. They stitched through the nail.
Then later I impaled my right leg on a fence just under my ass inside thigh. Tore a hole the size of a silver dollar. I could see my muscle moving back and forth like a window into my leg. |
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Posted: 1/11/2015 10:36:48 PM EDT
[#39]
Pics or it didn't happen.
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Posted: 1/11/2015 10:43:33 PM EDT
[#40]
I'm an afficianado of dumb; a connisuer of sorts. |
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Posted: 1/11/2015 10:48:31 PM EDT
[#41]
I was 10 or 11, and hanging out down at the local pond, fishing and doing stuff that 10 or 11 year olds do.
The previous evening I had watched some TV show where the bad guy picked up a bottle, smashed the end off, and threatened the good guy with it. So I'm looking down, and what do I see but a beer bottle. Not just any beer bottle, but one of those older, non-longneck Budweiser bottles. I reach down, pick it up, and attempt to emulate my cinematic observations. I smash that sucker against a rock and it shatters in my hand. Blood EVERYWHERE. Only one thing to do; go walk home and tell Dad (Dad is a pathologist, and while I ain't dead he IS a doctor and was always my first stop for medical attention). I'm walking down the street, holding my cut up hand in the air, gripping my wrist, with blood sheeting down my arm and dripping off my elbow onto the road. Neighbor cars stopping, "ARE YOU ALL RIGHT??!?", "Sure. Just cut my hand. Thanks...". I get home and Dad is snoozing in his favorite Sunday afternoon chair. "Hey Dad! Cut my hand!" "Erm?? Oh, you'll be OK. Wash it, bandage it, don't get blood on the floor." The whole thing was amazingly undramatic. I learned I'm NOT a bar fighter, and smashing bottles wasn't my thing. |
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Posted: 1/11/2015 10:48:45 PM EDT
[#42]
Quote HistoryQuoted:
I've done lots of stupid stuff. Bicycles can be the most fun. There's nothing like a concrete slab rapidly approaching your face, to let you know that you fucked up a long time ago. <-- Basically like that.
Machine tools can be great too. Especially when darwin taps me on the shoulder and says "Take a deeper cut next time, your part won't move." Yeah... right.... I've launched quite a bit of stuff across the room. Lots of cutters have been broken. But the upside is, now I know what "that sound" is on all of the machines I run at work. You know, that split second sound that lets you know you are walking on a very thin line. Like when shit is about to get very real, very fast and you have exactly 2 seconds to make up your mind and react. But hey, at least they don't have any blanchard grinders. One lathe at work throws work pieces with such accuracy, that you can predict which dicrection they will go, how high and far they will fly, and how far they will roll or bounce, all based on the RPM of the chuck. I think they need a new chuck, beacuse it doesn't grip for shit. The upside is, I usually know which way to duck. I sent one piece right over my right shoulder one day. I heard the whistle as it went by.
Forgetting to flip my welding hood down is always great. Now when I do it three times in a row.... It's time to clock out and go home. It's not like I have ever made any mistakes that were THAT dumb...
I love that sound of tires leaving the pavement. I haven't had it happen in a few years, but it has a good way of making clean underwear dirty rather rapidly. 
After 2 years of working in a machine shop, I have never seen a part get launched across the shop. |
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Posted: 1/11/2015 10:49:38 PM EDT
[#43]
Yeah but usually women and tequila were involved, not a ronco carrot slicer
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Posted: 1/11/2015 10:51:31 PM EDT
[#44]
Quote HistoryQuoted: Yeah but usually women and tequila were involved, not a ronco carrot slicer  |
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Posted: 1/11/2015 10:52:18 PM EDT
[#45]
You mean like running a 7" grinder without the guard.
When the blade exploded and the grinder kicked back into my face, I got a quick trip to the ER. Doc had to sew up my nose and right arm. |
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Posted: 1/11/2015 10:53:20 PM EDT
[#46]
Sure. All the time. What did you do?
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Posted: 1/11/2015 10:54:07 PM EDT
[#47]
I'm doing dumb shit right now, and tomorrow I have to fix a dumb thing I did in a dumb way.
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Posted: 1/11/2015 10:57:06 PM EDT
[#48]
Look at the bright side- you won't be leaving fingerprints wherever you go.
But, damn, that's gotta hurt. I hope you fished out the finger slice and kept it from ruining the salad. My story of stupid pain involves a torch of burning polyester fabric on a stick and 3rd degree burns hidden from my parents. No gangrene but lots of pus. |
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Posted: 1/11/2015 10:57:12 PM EDT
[#49]
Quote HistoryQuoted:
Nope. Lol Ok Mr Flawless Ever clean a deli meat slicer ? I have the knuckle scar to prove it. |
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Posted: 1/11/2015 10:58:27 PM EDT
[#50]
I wrote the book on idiot shit. I found out that the tip of the index finger has more nerve endings than anywhere else on your body. I wish I didn't know that. I also poured over-cooked caramel down a sink drain. Don't do that.
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