Did your father have a saying?

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[ARCHIVED THREAD] - Did your father have a saying? (Page 1 of 4)

Posted: 10/13/2004 6:00:10 AM EDT

You know how in movies a lot (I think it's kind of corny and cliche by now) fathers have a saying they always say to the son and somehow it is tied into the theme of the movie. Usually some feel good thing or moral instruction. Just wondering if anyone's father here actually had a unique thing they always said. Mine didn't.

Posted: 10/13/2004 6:03:44 AM EDT

[#1]

I said DO IT NOW, ya bastard. If you were working for me, I'd fire you.

Posted: 10/13/2004 6:04:49 AM EDT

[#2]

yea...

shut up.

Posted: 10/13/2004 6:05:05 AM EDT

[#3]

"A deal is a deal."

Tj

Posted: 10/13/2004 6:05:38 AM EDT

[#4]

Every nite..when I went out........HEY!...NO DRINKIN!

yes dad...

Posted: 10/13/2004 6:05:54 AM EDT

[#5]

"lay around f@ck around, I AINT WAITIN ON YOUR ASS!"
"i dont mind if you play the piano, but dont do it in the middle of the G@D D@MN ROAD!!" (only in traffic)

"If you arent doing things different by the time youre 18, i think you should grow a pony tail...SO YOU CAN PULL YOUR HEAD OUT OF YOUR ASS!"

And the most recent one i hear:
"Your mom and i love you, and we're very proud. Be careful, and come home in one piece"
I don't mind hearing that one.

Posted: 10/13/2004 6:06:08 AM EDT

[#6]

Pop's two favorites:

"That really frosts my ass"

and

"Cut it out or I'm gonna kick your ass up between your shoulder blades".

Posted: 10/13/2004 6:06:49 AM EDT

[#7]

"Shove it in her pooper and post pics."

Posted: 10/13/2004 6:07:36 AM EDT

[#8]

My father said:

Don't SHIT where you eat, and Don't JIZZ (sp?) where you work.

Blood Is Thicker Than Water. (Meaning Family First - ALWAYS)

What goes around, comes around.

Posted: 10/13/2004 6:07:52 AM EDT

[#9]

100 ata-boys and you can live here for free,.....one Aww-Shit wipes em all out.

Posted: 10/13/2004 6:09:45 AM EDT

[#10]

'A liar is worse than a thief...'

Posted: 10/13/2004 6:11:32 AM EDT

[#11]

The two that I remember are:

“shit in one hand and want in the other”

“beggars can’t be choosers”

Posted: 10/13/2004 6:11:58 AM EDT

[#12]

"If you never change your course in live, you'll end up where you're headed"

Posted: 10/13/2004 6:14:35 AM EDT

[#13]

"quit that monkey shines", he got that from my grandfather, I used to here my grandfather say that more than he did. They were always talking to me, not my siblings ...

Posted: 10/13/2004 6:17:00 AM EDT

[#14]

Your ass is grass and I am the lawnmower.

Posted: 10/13/2004 6:17:51 AM EDT

[#15]

hold your water

Posted: 10/13/2004 6:19:54 AM EDT

[#16]

"It just goes to show you..." ["it's always something", but that part's understood]

"With you women it's always a soap opera" - to my mom or three sisters.

Posted: 10/13/2004 6:20:40 AM EDT

[#17]

Quoted:
"A deal is a deal."

Tj

That pretty much sums up law school TJ!

Posted: 10/13/2004 6:21:09 AM EDT

[#18]

"A place for everything, everything in its place."

"Jesus Christ on a crutch!"

"There's the right way, the wrong way, the Air Force way, and there's my way. Do it my way, and we'll all get along."

(I later found out he stole that from "The Caine Mutiny"...)

My mom's dad:

"Don't do as I do, do as I say."

"If a Soviet bomber pilot ever dropped an A-bomb on West Virginia, he'd be court-martialed for wasting government property." (He was from WV)

My dad's dad:

"Money is the only real friend you will ever have."

"A stick on the bottom, cheers the day up."

Posted: 10/13/2004 6:21:23 AM EDT

[#19]

"step at a time" My pop

"We'll see" My pop

Posted: 10/13/2004 6:21:56 AM EDT

[#20]

"If it's illegal to fantasize about teenage girls, we'd all be in jail."

He only said this once, but I use it all the time...

Posted: 10/13/2004 6:23:40 AM EDT

[#21]

"Everyone likes ass, but no one likes a smart ass." Granddad
"You behave, but if you can't behave be careful." Granddad

Posted: 10/13/2004 6:26:00 AM EDT

[#22]

mine would always say "Oh well"

Posted: 10/13/2004 6:27:21 AM EDT

[#23]

"Don't do as I do, do as I say"

"Get your head out of your ass!"

And, one that was actually helpful (after numerous attempts to disprove the theory)

"When using a knife, always cut away from any body parts that you want to keep permanently attached, dumbass."

Posted: 10/13/2004 6:28:00 AM EDT

[#24]

"Quit your gasping! I didn't hit you that hard."

Posted: 10/13/2004 6:29:48 AM EDT

[#25]

My Dad still says, "Always expect the worst. Anything less than that is a bonus!"

Posted: 10/13/2004 6:30:39 AM EDT

[#26]

And I quote, "God damn son of a bitchin' Arizona ragtime cowboy Joe."

My dad was pretty good at swearing, if need be.

Posted: 10/13/2004 6:41:23 AM EDT

[#27]

Your mom and me brought you into this world. We can take you out of it and make another kid that looks just like you.

Only had to say it to me once because I BELIEVED HIM!

Posted: 10/13/2004 6:46:21 AM EDT

[#28]

When I say jump, you ask how high.

Dad wanted his word followed to the letter.

Posted: 10/13/2004 6:47:05 AM EDT

[#29]

"Fool me once, shame on you.

Fool me twice, shame on ME."

Posted: 10/13/2004 6:50:50 AM EDT

[#30]

Say you want something - "How does it feel to want?"

Ask a question - "It depends" - Usually followed by how much time or money

"Go ask your mother"

Luv ya dad

Posted: 10/13/2004 6:53:40 AM EDT

[#31]

The only one that sticks in my mine comes from my grandfather. While in the hospital,one week before he died from cancer, he remarked about a nurse that had just left the room. "I'd drink a gallon of her piss just to watch her fill the jug".

Posted: 10/13/2004 6:55:31 AM EDT

[#32]

yeah...............

"see ya"
..................bastard!

Posted: 10/13/2004 7:02:40 AM EDT

[#33]

"Stay away from women. They ain't nothin' but trouble."

I could certainly understand his perspective on that one.

Posted: 10/13/2004 7:10:29 AM EDT

[#34]

"I feel more like I do now, than I did then."

"Only one rule... no back-talk."

"I love you, son."

Posted: 10/13/2004 7:11:28 AM EDT

[#35]

"You may be smarter, but I'm meaner."

"Youth and talent are no match for age and treachery."

"That really chaps my butt."

"No, I think liberals are born dumb."

Posted: 10/13/2004 7:12:28 AM EDT

[#36]

"Remember son, if you sleep with a girl, you'll expose yourself to everyone she's slept with."

Posted: 10/13/2004 7:13:52 AM EDT

[#37]

"Do good in school."

Posted: 10/13/2004 7:15:28 AM EDT

[#38]

its only a scratch, it will grow shut before your asshole does.

Posted: 10/13/2004 7:18:03 AM EDT

[#39]

Hey!

My old man enjoyed a pint or two

He would tell me "Never lay your head on the bar...your finished then!" When drinking shots.."Check the booze..light a match and put it to the top of the shot glass if the booze don't light up the bastards watered down the bottle!"

Posted: 10/13/2004 7:20:37 AM EDT

[#40]

Nothing in this world is free

Meaning eveything will cost you somthing one way or the other.

Later,

Badredfish

Posted: 10/13/2004 7:25:12 AM EDT

[#41]

"Awww... GOD DAMNIT!"

Posted: 10/13/2004 7:29:24 AM EDT

[#42]

"What did you learn from this"
My Grandfather
My best friend

Posted: 10/13/2004 7:30:24 AM EDT

[#43]

Regarding a woman's monthly cycle vs. a man's needs:

Remember boy, if the paint on the front porch is wet, go for the back door..

Posted: 10/13/2004 7:37:58 AM EDT

[#44]

"When you go out in the rain... wear a raincoat." (condom)

Posted: 10/13/2004 7:39:56 AM EDT

[#45]

"If 'if's' and 'but's' were candy and nuts, we'd all have a merry Christmas!"

Posted: 10/13/2004 7:40:19 AM EDT

[#46]

"I stepped on a duck"

Oh how orig was that one, only man I ever hear say it.

Posted: 10/13/2004 7:43:40 AM EDT

[#47]

"If life was fair, there wouldn't be wheelchairs."

"When you lie to me, that makes me think that you think I'm stupid. And THAT fucking pisses me off!"

Posted: 10/13/2004 7:44:23 AM EDT

[#48]

"Never confuse your job with your life"

Posted: 10/13/2004 7:56:35 AM EDT

[#49]

Dad--

"If a job's worth doin', it's worth doin' RIGHT!"

"But did you LEARN anything?"

"Someday you'll learn to listen to the Old Man."

"My dad taught me, and his dad taught him, and now I'm teachin' you--you rinse your dirty soap out of the sink when you're done washing your hands."

"I'm only gonna tell you ONCE!"

"That paper will lay there and let them write anything on it." (Didn't believe everything I read)

"God dammit--everything you buy you have to bring home and rebuild to make it work right."

"Engineers only exist to torment the men who actually DO stuff."

"Some damned engineer got paid a lot of money to fuck that up."

"Now THAT required a real education to so royally fuck up."

"He's an educated idiot if I ever saw one."

"He's a triple-dipper." (Means a guy put 20 years in the military, then enough for a pension at another job, and drawing Social Security.)

"You can't buy good lumber any more." (said sadly)

"If you're man enough to get yourself into jail, you'll have to be man enough to get yourself out--don't call me."

Grandpa (maternal)--

"Children should be seen and not heard."

"I'm not goin' through that riga-marole."

Is grandma (paternal) okay to include?--

"Don't talk so much--you already know everything you're going to say. Be quiet and learn."

Posted: 10/13/2004 8:03:32 AM EDT

[#50]

Oh, there was a ton of them. I could give you quite a handy list. But the one that I heard the most and is always the first to recall was simply:

Think, before you do anything.

[ARCHIVED THREAD] - Did your father have a saying? (Page 1 of 4)

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