Dealing with Mall Ninjas..................

Posted: 6/7/2003 10:40:38 PM EDT

OK it's been a while since I went to a real mall, but I'm pretty much neutral toward them.

Posted: 6/7/2003 11:13:38 PM EDT

[#1]

I was just at the mall today. Man, these are some bad mother fvckers. He must have been wearing a fat suit to conceal his war beaten body from the public eye.

Posted: 6/7/2003 11:16:58 PM EDT

[#2]

I totaly crap my pants!

lucky for me, I haven't been to a mall in quite some time!

Posted: 6/8/2003 12:04:14 AM EDT

[#3]

They got rid of em at my local mall and the city cops opened an "outpost" in a vacant space. What would you call them, Kojack Ninjas?

Posted: 6/8/2003 12:38:20 AM EDT

[#4]

fscking rent-a-cops.

They are absolutely useless. All they can do is call the police.

IT's such a joke.

Posted: 6/8/2003 5:09:13 AM EDT

[#5]

I went to the Great Lakes Crossing mall in Michigan, to get some cheap .223 ammo, and their mall ninjas slipped in their cover. Even though they were wearing their fat siut and wrinkled want to be cop shirts, they were wearing their Marine Corps Drill Instructor covers, by accident I'm sure (or were they sending a message to evil doers smart enough to read the hint?)

Posted: 6/8/2003 5:30:58 AM EDT

[#6]

Beefing up the ranks of Mall Ninjas (undercover as greeters):
[url]http://www.syracuse.com/search/index.ssf?/base/business-3/105497495684000.xml?syrbubiz[/url]

Posted: 6/8/2003 5:40:03 AM EDT

[#7]

I had to vote for a "Hearty Thanks". I love seeing them beam with pride, then I go piss my pants.

Sometimes, I think you guys are a bad influence. [lol]

Posted: 6/8/2003 6:08:19 AM EDT

[#8]

OK, WTF are mall ninjas?

Posted: 6/8/2003 6:18:49 AM EDT

[#9]

Ironically enough, even though I have worked as a "rent-a-cop" in a mall for some time, I have to agree with Nam. There's only so much that can be done unless they're like beating the crap out of someone. Usually it's on the store employees to prove they actually saw a theif steal something, and usually they just "know" someone did something. Doesn't help us out much at all. There are no special powers with the job, nothing more than your average Joe wearing a uniform with a cloth badge. Man, I HATED that job, very frustrating.

Posted: 6/8/2003 6:22:54 AM EDT

[#10]

I love Mall Ninja's with my whole body, including my peepee. They're totally awesome, & by awesome I mean cool!.

Posted: 6/8/2003 6:38:44 AM EDT

[#11]

I love the way they wear their campaign covers like yarmulkes (sp?).

Posted: 6/8/2003 7:14:16 AM EDT

[#12]

My last encounter they didnt care for my mery fxckin xmas shirt.

Posted: 6/8/2003 7:28:37 AM EDT

[#13]

Quoted:
My last encounter they didnt care for my mery fxckin xmas shirt.

View Quote

You have one also? Neat! Where'd you get yours? My mother, knowing what a Bah!Humbug! type I am had one of her friends who did profesional embroidry work make mine. The "Merry Christmas" part is in red thread while the "Fxcking" part is in light green thread with the shirt itself being a darker green. From a distance it looks like a legit xmas shirt.

Posted: 6/8/2003 7:35:09 AM EDT

[#14]

Quoted:

Quoted:
My last encounter they didnt care for my mery fxckin xmas shirt.

View Quote

You have one also? Neat! Where'd you get yours? My mother, knowing what a Bah!Humbug! type I am had one of her friends who did profesional embroidry work make mine. The "Merry Christmas" part is in red thread while the "Fxcking" part is in light green thread with the shirt itself being a darker green. From a distance it looks like a legit xmas shirt.

View Quote

Insane clown posse's webstore. [url]http://store.yahoo.com/psychopathic-records-store/psy3110blkm.html[/url] Its a good one a hell of alot more people want to find where to get one the get upset.

Posted: 6/8/2003 7:57:03 AM EDT

[#15]

I'd have to say that they are totally useless and a waste of resources. They can't do anything.

Posted: 6/8/2003 8:26:06 AM EDT

[#16]

What...no Point & Laugh option?

Posted: 6/8/2003 8:46:38 AM EDT

[#17]

I notice a lot of "MALL NINJAs" or security
guards are very obese? wonder why they hire so many fat people as security guards?

I just ignore them, they dont look very impresive or intimidating. [beathorse]

Posted: 6/8/2003 8:53:48 AM EDT

[#18]

At astroworld, the ninjas were everywhere. 2 of my friends removed their shirts because it was freakin HOT. every 3 minutes or so a 6 flags ninja would appear and tell them to put their shirts on. finnally they decided to alternate. one left their shirt on while the other kept theirs off. when someone said somthing, they'd switch. LOL. all these ninjas were really old too so we could outrun them. we pretty much ignored them. What are they gonna do? Worst case, try and kick us out. course we'd just run and hide in a different part of the park. Unless a certified peace officer of the state of texas came up to them and said somthin, they werent gonna listen to the ninjas.

Posted: 6/8/2003 8:57:53 AM EDT

[#19]

You guys still hang out at malls? Sears never has anything in stock, I buy my music, reading material, and clothes via the web (though I occasionally buy a magazine at B&N), the mall movie theatres SUCK, I've never liked funnel cakes, there are better places to buy jewelry, and I just generally hate large groups of people.

Posted: 6/8/2003 9:43:56 AM EDT

[#20]

Quoted:
What...no Point & Laugh option?

View Quote

Well, it was late and both brain cells were slowing down.

Now I would edit the low-scoring "bear-baiting" option to make it P&L, but can't figure a way to do it.

Also, next time I have to enable multiple voting on something like this.

Posted: 6/8/2003 12:25:53 PM EDT

[#21]

[haiku]

The mall ninja rocks

You will crap your pants and pee

If you break the rules

[/haiku]

Posted: 6/8/2003 12:58:18 PM EDT

[#22]

I work a part time job as a armed guard and we arrest people all the time. How? You come to a concert or night club I'm working and get out of line I tell you to leave. You choose not to leave then I arrest you for criminal trustpass. I do call the police to come transport you though. Then you are the one getting laughed at in jail when all of the other losers find out a rent-a-pig maced yur ass and sent you to jail.

Posted: 6/8/2003 1:56:52 PM EDT

[#23]

I just started as a local mall ninja. I work 3rd shift at the local Mecca of Capitalism. I can't do much of anything, I am basically a walking customer service rep. If I see some punk grab something off a rack and bolt for the mall door about the only thing I can do is open the door for him and tell him to have a nice day.

In this day of sue-happy folks, liability worries basically render the "security" staff impotent. I just sit back in my office watching DVD's and playing Playstation2 from 11pm-7am getting off my ass occasionally to ride around the mall in the new Jeep Liberty and check the doors every couple of hours while they pay me.

I acknowledge and accept the fact that I am a rent-a-cop, but at least I am secure in the fact I don't have to work much and I have no supervisor looking over my shoulder at every turn and that I have run of the mall for 8 hours a day (granted I am one of 3 people there). It is a quiet job that allows me to read and think and get a little excercise while walking around the mall.

Posted: 6/8/2003 2:33:44 PM EDT

[#24]

Quoted:
OK, WTF are mall ninjas?

View Quote

[url]mallninja.com[/url]

[ARCHIVED THREAD] - Dealing with Mall Ninjas..................

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