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9/22/2017 12:11:25 AM
Posted: 11/23/2002 10:39:47 AM EDT
Here's my last 20 hours: Wife comes home. She insists on parking in a driveway next to ours (neighbor lets her) so she can get out easier. Have told her before just to use our driveway since she has trouble backing in. This time she backs into a chunck of concrete with the tire. Tire gone, wheel damaged, both need to be replaced. Cost: $200 (guess we didn't need that washing machine after all, dear). So I spend my day driving her to work and looking around for tires. Every place I can get a wheel from is closed until monday. So she asks her mother, who is unemployed, if she can borrow her car to go to work while I get the other car fixed. She says no. This is the same mother who several years ago charged up a joint credit card she held with my wife to $5K and never paid it back. She and her husband (who also used the credit card) now basically deny they ever changed anything on the card. I am so pissed. I'm never, ever visiting her parents again. They have been written off. Bastards.
Link Posted: 11/23/2002 10:42:56 AM EDT
[Last Edit: 11/23/2002 10:43:28 AM EDT by sgtar15]
I understand your anger towards the In-Laws, but I really think it is mis-directed. After all, it ain't thier fault that you have car problems, but rather the wifes fault. Sgtar15
Link Posted: 11/23/2002 10:44:34 AM EDT
And all of this happening right before the family oriented holidays Thanksgiving and Christmas! WOO HOO!
Link Posted: 11/23/2002 11:01:11 AM EDT
In-Laws = Cheap Reactive Targets!
Link Posted: 11/23/2002 11:36:01 AM EDT
Your wife's own mother won't let her borrow her car to goto work ? What a bitch.
Link Posted: 11/23/2002 11:36:09 AM EDT
sounds like you need a beer, my AR15.com brother
Link Posted: 11/23/2002 11:55:46 AM EDT
Originally Posted By bastiat: I am so pissed. I'm never, ever visiting her parents again. They have been written off. Bastards.
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Sounds like you need to hitch-up the trailer and move to a new neighborhood.
Link Posted: 11/23/2002 12:04:49 PM EDT
Originally Posted By coltcarbine: sounds like you need a beer, my AR15.com brother
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or atleast a Mike's Hard Lemonade
Link Posted: 11/23/2002 12:07:50 PM EDT
[Last Edit: 11/23/2002 12:11:48 PM EDT by bastiat]
I know the damage is my wife's fault. I'm going to talk to her on the long drive home (yay, I'm 800+ miles over my oil change due to previous emergency runs, now I get to add more on because MIL doesn't want to be without a car while she sits at home.) Here's a little more background so you can understand my anger towards them: MIL wanted a credit card, but had no credit record. My wife co-signed on a credit card. Wife used it for less than $100 a month, and paid balance every month. Four or so years ago, MIL buys EVERYBODY on her side of the family XMAS presents with wife's credit card. FIL also charges up model trains (his hobby) on the same credit card. Credit card gets maxed out. FIL/MIL start making token payments, but never on time. FIL loses job. MIL quits job. FIL and MIL enter into a grudge match with each other (this is per my wife) to see who can hold out the longest without getting a job. BTW, FIL is an experienced electrical engineer. He's even owned his own business. Doesn't want to do engineering work for 'just $30 an hour', so he stays unemployed. After unemployment runs out, he takes a part time delivery job that pays less than $10 an hour. MIL doesn't want to find work (Because she can't find a job that pays more than her last job), but unemployment runs out. Finds PT job. Quits that for a fulltime job. Gets fired two weeks later. Tries to get on unemployment again. Denied. Refuses to go back to the part time job. They're 2 people living in a tri-level 4 bedroom house they rent for $1400 a month. They don't have the sense to move into an apartment or condo (no room for FIL's train setup). Wife has been making payments on credit card for past 4 years but it's still at the limit, since her previous employer went out of business and she had to take a lower paying job. Card is still at $5K. We both work two jobs while the two of them work a total of 3 days a week. But they still manage to smoke a couple packs of cigs a day, though. (While I try to find ways to eat for less than $3.00 a day). And the greatest thing? They now are starting to deny they ever made those charges at all! Add to that the fact that FIL could take an EE job through a temp agency and have the card paid off in 2 months, but would rather deliver crap for $9 an hour 3 days a week. And if we had that credit card available, getting a new tire would be trivial. Now we have to take money we needed to spend on something else and put what we needed on hold. And MIL can't be troubled to let her daughter borrow a car- that she doesn't even need because she doesn't work - for a day and a half. NEVER AGAIN WILL I VISIT WITH OR TALK TO THESE PEOPLE!! I married into an episode of Jerry Springer!!
Link Posted: 11/23/2002 12:10:08 PM EDT
Originally Posted By QCMGR:
Originally Posted By bastiat: I am so pissed. I'm never, ever visiting her parents again. They have been written off. Bastards.
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Sounds like you need to hitch-up the trailer and move to a new neighborhood.
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We live in a very nice 1500 sq ft house (need a house for business reasons) in a nice suburban neighborhood. No trailers here. It's the in-laws that are acting like a Springer family.
Link Posted: 11/23/2002 12:54:16 PM EDT
Bastiat, What state do you live in?
Link Posted: 11/23/2002 1:01:38 PM EDT
Link Posted: 11/23/2002 1:03:03 PM EDT
Wasn't there a hint of this possibility before the wedding????You are in a no win situation in this battle. Hopefully you've cancelled the card. You will most likely eat the 5G. Look on the bright side, when they become old, they can move in with you and the bride!!!!
Link Posted: 11/23/2002 1:22:32 PM EDT
Originally Posted By mmsig229: Wasn't there a hint of this possibility before the wedding????You are in a no win situation in this battle. Hopefully you've cancelled the card. You will most likely eat the 5G. Look on the bright side, when they become old, they can move in with you and the bride!!!!
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Not really. At that time, they were still both working. Payments were being made, although slowly. Thought they were just having some problems and things would improve. Didn't realize they'd be going insane instead. MIL's name is off the credit card. Can't be used anyway since it's still over the limit. They are not EVER moving in with us. Once all our bills are paid off and I have some money in the bank (like I did before I got married and the tech sector sank [:(!] ) I'll be moving out of state, preferably to texas. If I have extra money, I'll encourage and help the rest of MY family move there, too. But the MIL and FIL can fend for themselves. They've given up any generosity I might ever show to them by screwing us during difficult times.
Link Posted: 11/23/2002 4:52:46 PM EDT
Originally Posted By bastiat:
Originally Posted By QCMGR:
Originally Posted By bastiat: I am so pissed. I'm never, ever visiting her parents again. They have been written off. Bastards.
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Sounds like you need to hitch-up the trailer and move to a new neighborhood.
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We live in a very nice 1500 sq ft house (need a house for business reasons) in a nice suburban neighborhood. No trailers here. It's the in-laws that are acting like a Springer family.
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That's what I meant.
Link Posted: 11/23/2002 6:02:09 PM EDT
Aint going into the holidays with a dysfunctional family fun ? and here I thought I was the only one -- only in our household it was MY family that played credit card games and estranged the whole family. Before I got married to my now wife my ex-girlfriend/fiance runs off with some guy and used my Visa card which she had a duplicate of and permission to use (prior to the breakup) to pay for a dress and a marrige licence in whereever the hell she ran off too. I eneded up contesting the charges but in the end I had to pay them to get my credit rating back on an even keel. So right about the time Me and my wife (who was herself paying off a bankruptcy from her early college days) get our credit back to a good place and get married, buy a house, a second car, and maintain our budget,payments etc; this new charge account from one Mchale FXXXX starts showing up on my TRW/Equifax reports. Mchale being my Grandmothers (deceased) maiden name but being close enough to Michael to count especially when the address on the account is only a few houses away from mine at the time our address being 18 and thiers being 12 on the same street/town/zip/st. Initally when asked My father denies the account even exists but when he goes away on vac the bills start comming in his mail that I am picking up for him and I demand an explanation when none is forth comming I tell him to pay off and close the account. In the meantime My daughter is born, on the night Rachel was brought into the world ( we had to induce due to complications ) I spent the 2 days of inducement/labor/afterwards in the Hospital alone with My wife until My MIL flies in from Salt Lake and takes a shuttle bus from Newark to Newburgh and then a taxi to the hospital using up Her monthly navy widows pension money in the process. I get home and get a few hours sleep and head back to the Hospital to bring My wife and MIL some Wendys and give MIL a chance to sleep Herself -- on the way I stop by mom and dads to see what emergency kept them from comming to see thier first and only grandchild or from picking Maggie up at the airport and giving Her a ride up. Well they had just HAD to go to the monthly F.O. Hibernians dinner the night before and as such could not get by the hospital.Hmmmph! BTW I had wrecked the cherokee a month before and the new one had not come in yet. And the Wrangler was at Quality engine getting the block replaced due to jiffy-lube's fantastic work. So I am down to a rental car. I just got so fed up with them about 6 months later they had only come buy the house 2-3 times to see Rachel and I heard from My sister that My wonderful Mother had some rather uncomplimentary things to say about my Wife when confronted she did not deny it but refused to aplogize after that call she has refused to talk to ME and I am happy to accomidate her.I finally told My dad if he did not pay down and close the CC account which he continues to use (and I get letters and phone calls about)I would contact the NYS AG and file a complaint about CC fraud ( He obtained a CC in a name other than his own and I assume a false SSN.) I had My wife write a letter to Him and copied it to My sisters (including My older sister who belives they can do no wrong) and the family's Atty detailing what I knew and what my course of action would be if he does not comply which must have gotten thru since he has started making real payments to the account. We have recently learned that someone at that address has applied for credit under My daughters name (She is 18 mo's old)and after a call from some people checking on refrences and such I think I have quashed that one. In all of this keep in mind that My Mother ran for office in our hometown on a "family values" ticket !!!!!!! WTF??? What family values ?? My daughter calls a neighbor "grandma" and I did not realize that CC fraud and theft were family values. The ex-girlfriend musta taught'em some new tricks. Good Irish Catholic family --- Whatever. I feel your pain bud theres no accounting for family. and Yeah holidays around here are a blast!!! Now that We moved to PA we dont have to deal with it anymore. Look at it this way I have plenty of time to go to the range on my days off unless we go to Utah for the holidays which we do every few years.
Link Posted: 11/23/2002 6:35:57 PM EDT
Every family has its trash. When my Grandpa died a couple of years ago my aunt and her family moved in and claimed everything in the name of the Garrisons before the rest of the family could fly in and take the things that Grandpa left specifically to them. They knew they would get away with it because the rest of the family has too much respect to dishonor Grandpa's memory by fighting over his posessions before the body was cold. My roomate's grandmother just died, and his family is going through the same crap now. Kyle
Link Posted: 11/23/2002 7:02:23 PM EDT
I don't want to be an asshole about it, but you do realize that credit is easy to establish without a co-signer. Oil companies and department stores will give credit cards to german shepherds and preschool children. No, it's not a $5K Visa or MC right off the bat, but the rule of thumb should be to start small and work your way up... just like you and your wife did. Why should your in-laws be any different? It wasn't yours or your wife's fault they are ignorant about finances and waited 20 years to establish credit. It sounds like these people are trying to live in some fantasyland diven solely by their egos. These kinds of narcissistic people are extremely dangerous and would not think twice about taking you and/or your wife down with them (misery loves company). RUN AWAY... RUN AWAY....
Link Posted: 11/23/2002 7:41:06 PM EDT
Winter time and the spring thaw leaves potholes the size of meteor craters around here. Fourtantly though I've ony damaged one rim and only ruined about 3-4 tires beyond repair in about 10 years. I got tired of paying $65.00 or more for a single tire from 'established' tire retailers a long time ago... and that was for non-brand name rubber. I think the current price is around $80-$100. Now I go to a salvage yard. At the one I go to the tires are tested and are about NRA %85-%95 condition [:)]. paid $30.00 for a decent Firestone and they mounted it for free (off the vehicle). I think I paid around $15.00-$20.00 for the rim.
Link Posted: 11/23/2002 8:01:06 PM EDT
Originally Posted By DrFrige: Bastiat, What state do you live in?
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State of Dysfunction?
Link Posted: 11/23/2002 8:35:39 PM EDT
Originally Posted By NOVA5:
Originally Posted By DrFrige: Bastiat, What state do you live in?
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State of Dysfunction?
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Not me - that's the inlaws. They also vacation in the state of denial... They're living in a big, nice house in an expensive suburb, just like they were when they were working. They could move a few miles away and save $700 a month easy. But they won't do it. FIL could sell of his train set that was partially financed with wife's CC, but he won't. FIL had credit, MIL didn't. I have no idea why the FIL didn't just co-sign for wife. Maybe he knew better... And don't worry about holidays. I'm not going over. I rarely went over because they all smoked like chimneys and I can't stand being in the same room that people are smoking in. No more trips over there. Life and Death emergencies? Yes. Visits where I can act like everything is peachy keen? Hell no.
Link Posted: 11/23/2002 8:40:59 PM EDT
bastiat You got rid of your mother in-law for 5 grand,thats cheap and I would say this is a happy ending of sorts. Count your blessings.
Link Posted: 11/23/2002 8:41:42 PM EDT
Two bright spots: Washing machine might not need to be replaced after all (think I can fix it myself for a few bucks) and tire doesn't seem to be damaged - so I'll just need to get a new rim (or a salvaged one if I can find it). But a more important lesson in all this is that when the chips were down and we needed just a little help from her parents who have already screwed us for $5k + interest, they couldn't be bothered. Guess the MIL wanted to have her car available to run for smokes in between daytime TV shows.
Link Posted: 11/24/2002 7:46:40 AM EDT
ive got a spare for my bronco you can borrow for a few days. 35x12.5x15 might fit yours. sorry .i'm glad to see you are better off than you thought. same sh%$ happens to the rest of us at the most inopportune time ,good luck...
Link Posted: 11/24/2002 1:10:27 PM EDT
Throw in a couple of "Who's your daddy" paternity suits, and you can go on the Maury Povich show instead of Jerry. You beat me to the punch. I was going to ask you how much fun the holiday season was going to be.One more tidbit though...If you try to escape to Texas, all that means is that when they come to visit, you can have them stay at your house!!!!!!Gee, that'll be fun.The FIL will plant his fat butt in your favorite chair and swipe the remote. This is while they're both smoking up a storm. Your air will look like a Zeppelin concert from the 70's............
Link Posted: 11/24/2002 1:20:40 PM EDT
Bastiat how about making your drive a little more user(wife)friendly? Bob [:D]
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