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Posted: 7/24/2013 4:28:36 AM EST
[Last Edit: 7/24/2013 4:28:52 AM EST by sitdwnandhngon]
My dad is the Varsity soccer coach at our school, small school, Class D.

Over the past few years though he has really turned the program around, they regularly defeat higher classed schools and leave the season very prepared to play in college.

He keeps asking me to coach the modified boys for him, apparently there is only one other person interested, but they never played soccer on any team. Probably just interested in the 2500 bucks it pays.

I have a one year old, and pretty steady work, so it would require a bit of a sacrifice on my part to make sure I was back in town by practice/game time every day for six weeks, but that isn't my concern.

At the modified level (7-8th grade) the emphasis is on skill building and learning the game, to prepare them to step up to JV with half a clue about what is going on. A solid program pretty much requires it be like that. That basically entails equal play time for each kid, regardless of the score of the game, you just have to match up your field the best you can and keep rotations regular, having reffed a youth league a few times I know that most parents are more childish than their children, and equal play time won't make the parents of little Johnny Superstar very happy, so it would likely just be a matter of time until I had to Randy Marsh one of them for being an asshole.

Anyone on here have tricks for dealing with douchebag sports parents? Is it even worth doing, I am still on the fence about the whole thing, since it basically means I can't order any concrete for 6 weeks during the last rush of the season, but I don't want the kids to get stuck with a shitty coach that will leave them hating life in the JV program.

Link Posted: 7/24/2013 4:45:54 AM EST
They'll be as huge pains as you let them be. There will be malcontents who will never be happy no matter what happens or what you do. It's about the kids, though. There should be some sort of Code of Conduct or Handbook that they have to sign before the season that can help "guide" their behavior and defuse shenanigans by setting the expectations.

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Link Posted: 7/24/2013 4:48:43 AM EST
Link Posted: 7/24/2013 4:52:53 AM EST
Also, try to work with your dad as part of the whole bigger program. Having that involvement will help the psychos see the bigger picture.

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Link Posted: 7/24/2013 4:59:04 AM EST
Having coached my boys football teams through Jr. High my advice is; if you have a short fuse, don't do it. Parents will push your buttons. Prepare for more work off the field than on.
Link Posted: 7/24/2013 5:02:33 AM EST
I coached high school sports for 5 years from JV to Varsity and I have seen the spectrum of not interested parents to the ones that never played the sport you are coaching giving you pointers that make zero sense. Honestly the best time I had was being an assistant Varsity coach, you get all the time with the kids and don't have to deal with the parents. As noted they only get away with as much as you let them. One thing that a lot of parents don't see is that I have been working with these kids 6 days a week 2-3 hours a day so I have a basic understanding of their skill level.

One thing to keep in mind is the parents that are on any PTA/ Sports Booster group . They have the ear of the faculty and from my dealings think they can force you to do something just because of their position. Maybe its where I live but my wife would come watch some of the games I coached and the parent were no better then their kids, they would talk shit about other parents and kids.

A lot of parents think their child is really good while they just fall flat on their face as soon as I put them in the game but it doesn't stop them from pestering me about game time. I have to take into consideration that im trying to build a kids confidence so my advise is I tune the parents out. When they have anything to say im polite and that's about it.

Link Posted: 7/24/2013 5:05:24 AM EST
Discussion ForumsJump to Quoted PostQuote History
Originally Posted By alacop:
Having coached my boys football teams through Jr. High my advice is; if you have a short fuse, don't do it. Parents will push your buttons. Prepare for more work off the field than on.
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That's what I'm scared of. I am a very easy going guy and don't really like confrontation, but if someone is just an asshole and gets right up in my face with no ability to reason or converse then the next best option is to just pop them in the nose, saves time.

I remember being that age though, and it really is an important point in the program, they are still young enough to not worry so much about making mistakes and since the focus is generally on the two older teams they can just go out and try different positions and learn to be comfortable on the field.

We have an excellent youth soccer program too each summer, and some of the parents around here are just borderline retarded when it comes to living vicariously through their kids sports.
Link Posted: 7/24/2013 5:08:40 AM EST
Lunacy in parenting is still "in". I'd pass unless I could get a feeling for the program beforehand and ensure I wasn't just volunteering to be a sacrificial lamb for a bunch of enraged shit flinging chimpanzee parents.

I've seen better behavior in some sub-saharan uprisings than is in evidence on the sidelines of many youth sports. I'm not joking. I'm not spreading it on thick. There's shit going on in youth sports today that you would not fucking believe if you don't see it yourself.
Link Posted: 7/24/2013 5:18:19 AM EST
[Last Edit: 7/24/2013 5:36:16 AM EST by htusa]
Lay down the rules on everything.
Make a syllabus and have a parent meeting.

Lay out to them what you expect, and what they are to expect from you.
Lay out to the kids what you expect from them.

Never be there alone with the kids, always have someone there to back you up.
Always walk away from everything, when practice/game its over head straight to the car.
I know some leagues include the coach needs to be there until all kids are gone.
You can do this from sitting in the car.

Tell the parents if they have an issue schedule a meeting, tell them to not do it in front of the kids.
If they do, send them packing.
Stand firm on this, do not have a one on one parent meeting by yourself. If there is a problem get the higher up in on the meeting.
This ends any confrontation, and the parents usually back down, or end up gone.

I ran AYSO for about 3 years and not once did I have a problem.
Parents respected (or feared me), I did have some other opponent coaches that did not understand the concept of a fair game and they ended up gone when I was done.
Some nice phone calls to district managers and video tape, ended their little I am a 2 year old fits.

I get fired up about games even though I am not playing, not the beat them at any cost fire. It is the my competitive juices are flowing and the thrill of competition is pulsing through me fire.
Passionate fire you can say.
I am still 100% level headed. It is a game played by humans who will make mistakes.
The thrill of a win is great and defeat is just as educational.

I run a tight ship. Let nothing go and followup on everything.
I will send you a copy of my syllabus if you want.
It is AYSO oriented but you can adapt to your needs.
Link Posted: 7/24/2013 5:22:20 AM EST
I love coaching youth football. I gave it up because of shit head parents.

My experience is you spend way more time dealing with parents than you get to spend coaching. Ain't nobody got time for that.
Link Posted: 7/24/2013 5:31:35 AM EST
[Last Edit: 7/24/2013 5:39:49 AM EST by LittleMagic]
I am going into my 4th year coaching youth football in my community. It is a development league (above pop warner but below jr high), I suppose. All of the headaches you will experience will come from <20% of the parent group as a whole. As is stated above, make a complete practice/game schedule with dates and times. Provide this to the parents at a preseason meeting. Lay down the law and stick to it. Create a group distribution list for communication of changes related to practice or other teams re-schedule of games so that you can communicate to the group via TEXT. Trust me you do not want to be on the phone for 2 hours every time you need to comm with the group.

I have had only 3 major incidents. Two of those 3 were by the same dad. Of course his son is by far the least talented, motivated, and capable on the entire team. He raised 9 kinds of hell our first year after the first game and simply could not understand why jr only got to play one 5 play series on offense. I politely explained to him that the success of the team was paramount to jr's self esteem. The seond issue was similar in nature the second year. Fortunately numbnutz has figured out we dont care and are not intimidated by all of the MMA tats.

You will need to plan your ingress/egress at practices such that you arrive in just enough time to get your necessary gear onto the practice field, but not so much time that your parents will engage you with inane bickering. Also, when practice is near completion engage the team in some mindless conditioning type activity so that you can gather your gear and load up. So that when practice is completed you can get OUT. If you linger around, every single basement commando dad will want to discuss their kids progress. Trust me. If you don't limit the amount of time you make available, all of the assholes that do not have time to work concession, gate, time clock, chain-gang, registration, etc. will tie you up until 9p talking about Martavius', or Quintel, Johnny, Billy's progress and why they are not getting playing time.
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