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Posted: 8/25/2005 9:50:19 PM EDT
THE SURPRISE JUMP
Late last night, it was drizzling rain, Lying in bed I was feeling no pain. I heard a ringing in my head, It was the telephone, so I jumped from my bed. I tripped, stumbled, and said hello, My first sergeant said it was time to go. I got to the company, hungry as could be, The platoon sergeant gave me an "MRE". Chute on my back, destination unknown, C-130 it began to groan. Jumpmaster said now don't you know, Stand up trooper, it's time to go. Stand up, hook up, shuffle to the door, Jump right out and count to four. As I floated to the ground, I began to look around. Lights were shining up at me, Where, oh, where could I be? Jumpmaster, he had missed his spot, This LZ was mighty hot. Shake, fries and a "Big Mac" to go, We landed at McDonalds, don't cha know YELLOW RIBBON Around her hair she wore a yellow ribbon She wore it in the spring time, in the early month of May And if you asked her why the heck she wore it She'd say she wore it for her soldier who was far, far away Far away Far away She wore it for her soldier who was far, far away Around the block she pushed a baby carriage She pushed it in the spring time, in the early month of May And if you asked her why the heck she pushed it She'd say she pushed it for her soldier who was far, far away Far away Far away She pushed it for her soldier who was far, far away Behind the door, her father kept a shotgun She kept it in the spring time, in the early month of May And if you asked her why the heck she kept it She'd say she kept it for her soldier who was far, far away Far away Far away She kept it for her soldier who was far, far away Around his grave she laid the pretty flowers She laid them in the spring time, in the early month of May And if you asked her why the heck she laid them She'd say she laid them for her soldier who was far, far away Far away Far away She laid them for her soldier who was far, far away LONG DISTANCE DADDY Mamma and Papa were layin' in bed, Papa rolled over and this is what he said... Gimme some. P.T. It's good for you, It's good for me. We'll get up in morning with the rising sun, We'll run all day till the day is done. Mile one, Havin' fun. Mile two, Good for you. Mile three, Good for me. Mile four, I want some more. Mile five, Keep me alive. Mile six, Great kicks. Mile seven, This is heaven. Mile eight, This is great. Mile nine, Mighty fine. Mile ten, Let's do it again. FIRST FORMATION First formation it was pouring rain, 1 SG said it was time for pain. Then he said extend to the right, All you sick calls get out of my sight. Spent last night out drinkin' gin, Knew for sure I'd see it again. Pushup, situps, run in place, 1 SG was setting a helluva pace. High jumper, lunger, and body twist, So many others too numerous to list. By the time we assembled to the right, I was praying with all my might. 1 SG spotted me in my daze, Said where've you been the last couple of days? Told him I spent them with my girl, Oh, how she makes my head swirl. 1 SG said that's well and fine, But today, hero, your ass is mine. How many times do I have to say, If you play the game you got to pay. DOUBLE-TIME......ANYTIME......MARCH! C-130 rolling down the strip 64 troopers gonna take a little trip Mission top secret, destination unknown And they don't give a damn if they ever come home Stand up, hook up, shuffle to the door Jump right out and count to four If that main don't open wide I've got a reserve by my side And if that one should fail me too Here is all that I should do Roll over get up and run off the DZ Cause never in HELL will ya' bury me ALL THE WAY Hey! Hey! All the way, We love to run every day. If I were President and had my way, There wouldn't be a fat man in the Army today. Everyone would be fit to fight, Whether you test them day or night. When I jump onto the old drop zone, Most of the enemy had already gone. Those that remained weren't fit to fight, So enemy contact was really light. We ran the stragglers off the old drop zone, Everything is quiet and they're all gone. I ran towards an improved machine gun nest, Spraying lead, I was really at my best. The enemy tried to bob and weave, My blood curdling screams like to made him heave. I snatched him out of his well dug hole And really fixed him, God bless his soul A-10 PILOTS A10 pilots flying high A10 pilots flying by Looking down let's have some fun 5 little commies watch them run Air Force pilots sing their song I just love to drop napalm 5 little commies in the grassWatch that A10 light their ass 4 Little commies down by the lake Come on people watch them bake 3 little commies in the hut Watch that napalm light their but 2 little commies jump in the cave Come on napalm make their grave 1 little commie's getting hot Watch that napalm hit the spot A10 pilots in the sun A10 pilots out for fun Air Force pilots sing their song AIRBORNE PT Early one morning in the pouring rain, First Sergeant said it was time for pain, grab your ruck and follow me! Its time to do some PT. We jogged nine miles and we ran three, The First Sergeants yelling follow me! Then we walked two miles and ran eight! Airborne PT sure is great! AN AIRBORNE MAN I used to be an Airborne man, They dropped me from a plane in Vietnam. Lock and load your M16, Grab your gear and follow me! Take the safety off your gun, Lets go have some combat fun. Find some enemies, roamin'' around, Take your aim and mow 'em down. Find some N.V.A.. and capture them all, Line them up against the wall. Cock your Colt and line up a shot, Squeeze the trigger and kill the lot. BACKWOODS JOHNNY Backwoods Johnny was a wrestlin' fool. He wrestled alligators on his way toschool. He'd stroke their bellies and throw'em in a sack, and run off to school with a gator on his back. Teacher seen him coming, jump on a chair. She yelled at Johnny, "Get your gator outta here!" Johnny replied as he took his seat, "You better mind your manners 'cause mygator wants some meat!" BODIES BLEEDING, BODIES Load another magazine, in my trusty M16. Cuz all I ever wanna see! Is bodies, bleeding bodies. Throw another hand grenade!Should have seen the mess I made. Cuz all I ever wanna see, Is bodies, broken bodies. Stab em with the bayonet!If he squirms you're not done yet! Cuz all I ever wanna see, Is bodies, cut-up bodies. Call some more TACAIR. On that bunker over there. Cuz all I ever wanna see, Is bodies burnin bodies! THE COWBOY Hey, Hey, what do you say, I'm goin' to the rod-e-o today. I drew a bad bull, heard he was a bear, But I can hang for 8, so I just don't care. Tie up, bear down, sittin' on my bull, I'm just waitin' for the gate to pull. Out from the chute blows my old ride, It's a wonder that I'm still alive. Just right then the 8 seconds pass, I jump right off of that bull's ass. Quick, turn around and what do I see? That old bull come a-chargin' at me. I pull a cut-down 12-gauge from my hip, And send that bull on a little trip. I'm the meanest cowboy that you ever did see, U.S. Army Infantry! JOHNNY Mamma told Johnny not to go downtown, Heard the Marine recruiter was hangin around. Johnny went downtown anyways, wanted to hear what recruiter had to say. Recruiter asked Johnny what he wanted to be, Johnny said, "I am wanna be infantry". Johnny caught a plane to Vietnam, there he fought the Viet-Cong. Many he killed by knife and blade, God only knows how many lives he saved. Well Johnny was bold and Johnny was brave, Johnny jumped on a hand grenade. Saved the lives of the men he lead, but before he died, this is what he said. "Mamma O mamma please dont you cry, The Marine Corps motto is Semper Fi!" IRENE Irene's her name She's one of the best. So every night I give her the test. She looks so pretty. So sleek, so slim. The moon is bright the lights are dim. I've seen her stripped. I've seen her bare, I've felt her over everywhere. I handled her just as gentle as I could. And when I got in her I knew she was good. I rolled her over on her side Then on her back I also tried. She's just one big thrill the best in the land. She's an F-16 in the Air Combat Command. SALLY BROWN There was a girl called Sally Brown Said no man could lay her down. Then over the hill came perfect Pete He was 50 pounds of swingin' meat. He lay Sally down in the grass And shoved his dick up her ass. Sally let out a ripper fart Blew Pete's balls 20 feet apart. Over that hill went Perfect Pete's 50 pounds of damaged meat. In the Clover Roll me over, in the clover. Lay your body next to mine, roll it on down the line! So I gave her inches 1. She said baby you'er the one! Roll me over, in the clover. Lay your body next to mine, roll it on down the line. Do I gave her inches 2 She said u-wi-u-wi-u! Roll me over, in the clover. Lay your body next to mine, roll it on down the line. So I gave her inches 3, She said baby that's for me! Roll me over, in the clover. Lay your body next to mine, Roll it on down the line. So I gave her inches 4. She said baby give me more! Roll me over, in the clover. Lay your body next to mine roll it on down the line. So I gave her inches 5. She said baby I'm alive! Roll me over in the clover. Lay your body next to mine. Roll it on down the line. So I gave her inches 6, She said baby that's for kicks. Roll me over, in the clover. Lay your body next to mine, roll it on down the line. So I gave her inches 7, She said baby I'm in heaven. Roll me over, in the clover. Lay your body next to mine, Roll it on down the line. So I gave her inches 8, She said baby that was great. Roll me over, in the clover. Lay your body next to mine. Roll it on down the line. So I gave her inches 9. She said baby you look fine. Roll me over, in the clover. Lay your body next to mine. Roll it on down the line. T HEY SAY THAT IN THE ARMY They say that in the Army the coffee's mighty fine It looks like muddy water and tastes like turpentine Chorus: Oh Lord, I wanna go But they won't let me go Oh Lord, I wanna go hoo-hoo-hoooome EH! They say that in the Army the chow is mighty fine a chicken jumped off the table and started marking time Chorus: Oh Lord, I wanna go But they won't let me go Oh Lord, I wanna go hoo-hoo-hoooome EH! They say that in the Army the biscuits are mighty fine one rolled off the table and killed a friend of mine Chorus: Oh Lord, I wanna go But they won't let me go Oh Lord, I wanna go hoo-hoo-hoooome EH! They say that in the Army the training's might fine last night there were ten of us, now there's only nine Chorus: Oh Lord, I wanna go But they won't let me go Oh Lord, I wanna go hoo-hoo-hoooome EH! They say that in the Army the pay is mighty fine they give you a hundred dollars and take back ninety-nine Chorus: Oh Lord, I wanna go But they won't let me go Oh Lord, I wanna go hoo-hoo-hoooome EH CHOW Up in the morning, before day I don't like it, no way Eat my breakfast too damn soon Hungry as hell by noon Went to the mess sergeant on my knees Said "mess SGT., mess SGT. feed me please" Mess SGT. said with a big wide grin "If you wanna be Waterborne, you gotta be thin" JESSE JAMES Jesse James said before he died There's five things that he wanted to ride Bicycle, tricycle, automobile An M-1 tank and a ferris wheel Jesse James said in his final will He had five things that he wanted to kill A lion, a tiger, a kangaroo A long haired hippie, and instructor too And ifen he could kill just one He'd kill the instructor, let the hippie run NOTHING TO DO AG, AG, who are you? TDA with nothing to do Go to PT at nine a.m. Then to the pool to have a swim Racquetball from nine to ten Recover with a tonic and gin Lunch from eleven to noon, Your day will be over soon Volleyball from noon to three Keep really busy, can't you see Now it's four, your day is through I wish I was AG too BLACK BERETS Six hundred black berets Caught in a valley by the NVA Billy was worried, didn't know what to do So he called on me and you We jumped on in in the middle of the night Looks like another bloody fire fight I set my weapon on Rock n Roll I boogied and woogied and continued to stroll Killing Communists just for fun High body count now two for one If you got trouble in the world today Just call on the men of the green beret! ONE MILE One mile No sweat Two mile Better yet Three miles Gotta run Four miles To the sun SUPERMAN Me and Superman got in a fight I hit him in the head with some Kryptonite I hit him so hard I busted his brain And now I'm dating Lois Lane Well, me and Batman, we had one too I hit him in the head with my left shoe Right in the temple with my left heel And now I'm driving the Batmobile EVERY WHERE I GO Everywhere I go There's a Drill Sergeant there Every where I go There's a Drill Sergeant there Drill Sergeant Drill Sergeant Why don't you leave me alone And let me go back home When I eat my chow... (sub in for Everywhere I go) When I comb my hair... When I brush my teeth... When I get my shots... When I do PT... When I see my girl... When I get out of bed... On an FTX... COUNT CADENCE Delay cadence Count cadence Delay cadence Count (one) Can't Hear you (two) Little louder now (three) All together (four) Everybody (one) Hit it (two) Kick it three) Stab it (four) Kill it one, two, three, four, one, two, three, four we like it here we love it here It's a home away from home (A what?) a home away from home (A what?) a home away from home HERE WE GO Here we go again Same old stuff again Marching down the avenue Few more days and we'll be through I won't have to look at you So, I'll be glad and so will you |
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Side note, works well:
Caller: They say that in the Army the coffee's mighty fine ------------------------(WHO SAID THAT!) Caller: It looks like muddy water and tastes like turpentine ----(HO-----LY SHIT!) I know this doesn't look right, but during the first call of the line, this is when the platoon or company says it. I tried to show timing with the spacing of the words. It's funny as hell when you got 30-40 swinging richards sounding off with this. |
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Left Right left right left right kill (uh huh)
Left right left right ya know we will (oh yeah) Went to the school where the kiddies go to learn called for some napalm and watched them burn LRLRLR Kill LRLR ya know we will went to the special olympics where no one comes in last Set up my claymore and I prepared to blast LRLRLR Kill LRLR ya know we will Went to the local Wal-Mart where all the dirty people shop Pulled out my machete and I began to chop further verses: went to the playground where the kiddies go to play called in an airstrike and blew them all away went to McDonalds where the kiddies go to eat pulled out my KBar and cut off their feet etc. |
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A little puppy with little paws was sitting on my table saw A little puppy with liiiitle paws was sitting on my (stomp) table saw I'd lured him in with a piece of meat and then i cut off his fucking feet I'd lured him in with a piece of meat and then i cut off his (stomp) fucking feet I called the doctor the doctor said your little puppy is f'ing dead I picked him up and shook him out that little puppy began to shout ..... |
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the best ones for me are the ones that have been deemed "inapproperate"
UH-1 flying through the trees dropping bombs on the refugees what the hell the ammo is free and naplam sticks to kids a yellow bird with yellow bill flew upon my window sill I lured him in with a crust of bread and then I smashed his (stomp your foot) fuckin' head I don't know, but I've been told russian pussy is mighty cold Up jumped the monkey from the coconut grove he was a mean mother fucker, you could tell by his clothes With his 10 pound balls and his 12 inch prick He was a loud mouth-mother fuckin son of a bitch He lined a hundred women up against the wall And bet anyone that he could fuck them all He fucked 98 till his balls turn blue Then he backed off, jacked off, and fucked the other two there are a lot more......but time has a way of having you forget them.... |
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Marching Cadence
"Beret" See that man in the maroon beret Jumpin's how he earns his pay That's the only life for me Airborne Infantry See that man in the tan beret Killin's how he earns his pay That's the only life for me Airborne Ranger infantry See that man in the green beret Training nations everyday That's the only life for me Special Forces infantry See that man in the black beret Walkin's how he earns his pay That's the only life for me Straight leg infantry See that man in the blue beret Peacekeeping every day That's the only life for me United Nations infantry See that man in the orange beret Guarding the border every day That's the only life for me MFO infantry See that man with the beard on his face Ask him and he'll say he's been no place That's the only life for me Delta force infantry See that man in the baseball cap Beer in his hand, chips in his lap That's the only life for me National Guard infantry Had to tweak it a bit since the big headgear change, straight leg used to start "See that man with the leg cap on, marching marching all day long". I am also assuming that we supply troops to the Multinational Force and Observers (MFO) that guard the border ont eh Sinai Peninsula. That was happening in the 90's when I was in anyway, when 101st pulled the duty, they were all strutting around Ft. Campbell with desert cammies and orange berets. |
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C-130 rollin down the strip,
Airborne Ranger on a one way trip, Weapon in his hand, destination unknown, Airborne Ranger ain't never coming home. |
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Sapper in the wire
Holy shit! We're taking fire He was always ready to go So early So early So early in the morning Sniper on the hill He's ready to shoot, He's ready to kill He was always ready to go So early So early So early in the morning |
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Hey Hey Captain Jack
Meet me by the railroad track With a rifle in your hand I wanna be a killin' man A KILLIN' MAN!! A killin' man When I go to Heaven Saint Peter he will say How'd ya earn your livin' How'd ya earn your pay I reply with a little bit of thunder I earned my livin' killin' down under When I go to bars The girls they will say How'd ya earn your livin' How'd ya earn your pay I reply with a cool kind of suave I earn my livin' killin' commies for my God When I go home The hippies they will say How'd ya earn your livin' How'd ya earn your pay I reply as I pull out my knife Get outta my way before I take your life!! |
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hey hey captain Jack
meet me down by the railroad track with a rifle in my hand Im gonna be a killin man hey hey captain Jack meet me down by the rairoad track with a bottle in my hand Im gonna be a drinkin man hey hey captain Jack meet me down by the railroad track with those car keys in my hand Im gonna be a driving man hey hey captain jack meet me down by the railroad track with those flowers in my hand, Im gonna be a lovin man. hey hey captain jack meet me down by the railroad track with that knife in my hand Im gonna be a stabbin man |
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To the tune of "The ants go marching".
I place my hand upon her knee ya ho, ya ho. I place my hand upon her knee ya ho, ya ho. I placed my hand upon her knee, now sailer boy your teasing me. get in get out get fucking about , ya ho, ya ho, ya ho. I placed my hand upon her tit ya ho, ya ho, I placed my hand upon her tit ya ho, ya ho, I placed my hand upon her tit, now sailer boy your squessing it. get in get out get fucking about , ya ho, ya ho, ya ho. I placed my hand upon het twat, ya ho, ya ho. I placed my hand upon her twat, ya ho, ya ho. I placed my hand upon her twat, now sailer boy you found the spot, get in, get out, get fucking about, ya ho, ya ho, ya ho. Now she's moved to Boston town, ya ho, ya ho. Now she's moved to Boston town, ya ho, ya ho. Now she's moved to Boston town, with fuckin sailers all around, get in, get out, get fuckin about, ya ho, ya ho, ya ho. (slower now) Now she's got a wooden box, ya ho, ya ho. Now she's got a wooden box, ya ho, ya ho. Now she's got a wooden box, (pause) FOR FUCKING MARINES WITH WOODEN COCKS, get in , get out, get fucking about, ya ho, ya ho ,ya ho. |
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Well, up jumped the monkey from the coconut grove,
he's a mean mother fucker you can tell by his clothes, with a two pop beanie and a two button stich he's a cock sucking , mother fucking, son of a bitch. He walks through the jungle with his dick in his hand, saying "look out women, I'm a pussy loveing man". Well he lined a hundred women up against the wall, takin fifty dollar bets he could fuck'em all. Well he fuck ninety eight untill his balls turned blue, back off, jacked off, and fucked the other two. Well the monkey died and went straight to hell, he fucked the devils wife and his daughter as well. You better watch out baby or he'll fuck you! |
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Back in OCS, one of my TAC officers ordered me to delete "Tiny Bubbles" from my cadence repertoire. So I obliged him with something close to the following cadence:
Tiny bullets/In my gun Keep me happy/Having fun. Five point Five/Six Millimeter Good to go for/ 800 meters. Twenty inches/Of hot blue steel Is what you need for/Good clean kills. Hadji knows that/bullets don't tumble Fragmentation's/what giives him trouble. For some reason, the good CPT smoked me pretty good afterward |
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Anyone remember the words to "Old Kig Cole" marching cadence?
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Old King Cole was a merry old soul; a merry old soul was he. He called for his pipe and he called for his bowl and he called for his Privates three. Beer! Beer! Beer! Said the Privates. What merry men are we! but none so fair that we can compare to the Airborne Infantry! Old King Cole was a merry old soul; a merry old soul was he. He called for his pipe and he called for his bowl and he called for his Corporals three. I need a three day pass said the Corporal Beer! Beer! Beer! Said the Privates. Old King Cole was a merry old soul; a merry old soul was he. He called for his pipe and he called for his bowl and he called for his Sergeants three. Left right left said the Sergeant. I need a three day pass said the Corporal Beer! Beer! Beer! Said the Privates. Old King Cole was a merry old soul; a merry old soul was he. He called for his pipe and he called for his bowl and he called for his LTs three. What do I do now? Said the LT. Left right left said the Sergeant. I need a three day pass said the Corporal Beer! Beer! Beer! Said the Privates. Old King Cole was a merry old soul; a merry old soul was he. He called for his pipe and he called for his bowl and he called for his Captains three. Whose gunna drive my Hummer? Said the Captain What do I do now? Said the LT. Left right left said the Sergeant. I need a three day pass said the Corporal Beer! Beer! Beer! Said the Privates. Old King Cole was a merry old soul; a merry old soul was he. He called for his pipe and he called for his bowl and he called for his Majors three. I need a bigger desk said the major. Whose gunna drive my Hummer? Said the Captain What do I do now? Said the LT. Left right left said the Sergeant. I need a three day pass said the Corporal Beer! Beer! Beer! Said the Privates. Old King Cole was a merry old soul; a merry old soul was he. He called for his pipe and he called for his bowl and he called for his Colonels three. When can I play golf? Said the Colonel. I need a bigger desk said the major. Whose gunna drive my Hummer? Said the Captain. What do I do now? Said the LT. Left right left said the Sergeant. I need a three day pass said the Corporal Beer! Beer! Beer! Said the Privates. Old King Cole was a merry old soul; a merry old soul was he. He called for his pipe and he called for his bowl and he called for his Generals three. Keep those Privates straight! Said the Generals When can I play golf? Said the Colonel. I need a bigger desk said the major. Whose gunna drive my Hummer? Said the Captain. What do I do now? Said the LT. Left right left said the Sergeant. I need a three day pass said the Corporal Beer! Beer! Beer! Said the Privates. |
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Please someone tell me they know the Marine Dang Dew cadence....
Probably one of the most politically incorrect cadences ever, and I can't remember how the whole thing goes. What I do remember: Marine Dang Dew, now what is that? It's soft and warm, like a pussy cat. Well it smells like fish, and it's split in two. And that's what you call, the Marine Dang Dew. More? Anyone? |
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Heh, here's one from the files....
Cadence caller (troops) **** 1, 2, 3, 4... (You cant count to 5!) 1, 2, 3, 4... (Because your BRAIN is fried!) (On Crack, And Dope, And all that Shit you Smoke... CRACK BABY!) *** One-Oh-One Screamin Eagles Pick up your Ropes and follow me! Air-Assault Infantry! Eighty-Second All-American Pick up your chutes and follow me! Airborne Infantry! Twenty-Fifth Tropic Lightning Pick up your Rag-tops and follow me! Light-Fighting Infantry! Tenth Division Mountain Fighters Pick up your rucks and follow me We're the Mountain Infantry! First Division The Big Red One Pick up your Rifles and Follow me! Mechanized Infantry! *** (and my Own personal Favorite) In The early morning Rain In the Early morning Rain... In the Early morning rain (this line is always drawn out) In the Early Morning Rain. See the Soldier on the hill?? He is not afraid to kill. See the soldier on the Hill He is not afraid to kill. With the Enemy to my front And the Ocean to my Rear The sound of shells are all I hear In the Early morning rain. |
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Don't let your dingle-dangle dangle in the dirt,
Pick up your dingle-dangle clean it in your shirt. Don't let your dingle-dangle dangle in the sand, Pick up your dingle-dangle hold it in your hand. Don't let your dingle-dangle dangle in the grass, Pick up your dingle-dangle stick it in your AS YOU WERE. |
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