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Posted: 10/3/2004 1:49:01 PM EST


Girl I work with has this hyperactive mouth on her...talks about 1000mph about anything (and loud).
We were talking about men helping out around the house when she mentions that her hubby is real lazy about cleaning...so lazy in fact that she makes him sit down to pee because she was tired of cleaning up for his bad aim..

What I really like about this is that he was drunk and obnoxious at the last Christmas Party..I think I'll have to file this little factoid away for a few months.
Link Posted: 10/3/2004 1:51:06 PM EST
[Last Edit: 10/3/2004 1:51:53 PM EST by DK-Prof]
I often sit down to pee at my own house.

If I had some servant or live-in-slave who cleaned up my filth after me, I would definitely stand, but I live by myself, and I want a clean house. The way I see it, sitting to pee (at home) is easier and more pleasant than cleaning up urine on my hands and knees.

However - I would never do it anywhere else. I am NOT touching a toilet seat outside my house unelss I am desperate to take a dump, and might die if I don't
Link Posted: 10/3/2004 1:52:27 PM EST

Originally Posted By DK-Prof:
I often sit down to pee at my own house.

If I had some servant or live-in-slave who cleaned up my filth after me, I would definitely stand, but I live by myself, and I want a clean house. The way I see it, sitting to pee (at home) is easier and more pleasant than cleaning up urine on my hands and knees.

However - I would never do it anywhere else. I am NOT touching a toilet seat outside my house unelss I am desperate to take a dump, and might die if I don't



I would not have shared that
Link Posted: 10/3/2004 1:53:11 PM EST

Originally Posted By MrClean4Hire:

I would not have shared that




Standing, sitting, in the shower - I can do all of them
Link Posted: 10/3/2004 1:54:50 PM EST
I'v been known to crap, clean up, stand up and turn around and piss. In a grand avoidance of peeing sitting down.
Link Posted: 10/3/2004 1:55:39 PM EST
i tend to piss on walls and make my woman clean it up so she knows her place................
Link Posted: 10/3/2004 1:55:49 PM EST
Wow, if you can't aim your own equipment that you've practiced with your whole life, I'd hate to see you shoot an AR-15.
Link Posted: 10/3/2004 1:56:26 PM EST

Originally Posted By dport:
Wow, if you can't aim your own equipment that you've practiced with your whole life, I'd hate to see you shoot an AR-15.



Link Posted: 10/3/2004 1:56:57 PM EST

If you pee outdoors exclusively, there will be no mess to clean up.

Link Posted: 10/3/2004 1:57:21 PM EST
The following is true.

I was at a customer's house and I was dancing the PP jig pretty good. I asked the customer if I may use his bathroom. He was an ass to start with. He said "Sure.... but dont stand"... I said "Excuse me?"

He said "When a man stands to urinate, it sprays all over the place"

I told him "Then you know what, I will be right back... I dont need anyone to tell me how to piss so to respect your home, I will go to the local Mc Donalds"

Link Posted: 10/3/2004 1:58:37 PM EST

Originally Posted By AvengeR15:
If you pee outdoors exclusively, there will be no mess to clean up.




I grew up with 4 older sisters, I lived in the country, peeing outside was almost mandatory for me
Link Posted: 10/3/2004 2:01:24 PM EST
I wish I had a urinal for those late night shooting sessions.
Link Posted: 10/3/2004 2:06:32 PM EST
If I stand on the back porch and piss in the yard my wife gets mad, If I stand in the yard and piss on the porch she still gets mad.
Link Posted: 10/3/2004 2:07:38 PM EST

Originally Posted By AvengeR15:
If you pee outdoors exclusively, there will be no mess to clean up.





Nothing like walking out back to take a leak, just something about that, that is so right...
Link Posted: 10/3/2004 2:08:59 PM EST

Originally Posted By DK-Prof:
I often sit down to pee at my own house.

If I had some servant or live-in-slave who cleaned up my filth after me, I would definitely stand, but I live by myself, and I want a clean house. The way I see it, sitting to pee (at home) is easier and more pleasant than cleaning up urine on my hands and knees.

However - I would never do it anywhere else. I am NOT touching a toilet seat outside my house unelss I am desperate to take a dump, and might die if I don't



I hope your ready to hand over your man card.
Link Posted: 10/3/2004 2:09:06 PM EST

Originally Posted By mjohn3006:
I'v been known to crap, clean up, stand up and turn around and piss. In a grand avoidance of peeing sitting down.



Peeing sitting down because you happen to be already sitting down is one thing...but having your wife standing there with her arms folded and tapping her foot with her eyebrow cocked at you....I understand there are some humiliating aspects to marriage...but damn!!
Link Posted: 10/3/2004 2:09:22 PM EST

Originally Posted By byron2112:
I wish I had a urinal for those late night shooting sessions.




If I ever become obscenely wealthy, I'm totally going to have a separate urinal in my palatial bathroom.

Then again, if I was wealthy, I could have a live-in servant to clean up all the time, and would just pee standing up anayway.


Link Posted: 10/3/2004 2:10:10 PM EST

Originally Posted By 1shott:

Originally Posted By AvengeR15:
If you pee outdoors exclusively, there will be no mess to clean up.





Nothing like walking out back to take a leak, just something about that, that is so right...



i do that...only after hours. neighbor walked at the wrong time once. never did carry a conversation with him after that. just a hey, hello.
Link Posted: 10/3/2004 2:11:53 PM EST

Originally Posted By DK-Prof:

Originally Posted By byron2112:
I wish I had a urinal for those late night shooting sessions.




If I ever become obscenely wealthy, I'm totally going to have a separate urinal in my palatial bathroom.

Then again, if I was wealthy, I could have a live-in servant to clean up all the time, and would just pee standing up anayway.





Maybe you just ought to put the toilet on a lift,since you can't make your dick longer
Link Posted: 10/3/2004 2:14:06 PM EST

Originally Posted By DK-Prof:
I often sit down to pee at my own house.

If I had some servant or live-in-slave who cleaned up my filth after me, I would definitely stand, but I live by myself, and I want a clean house. The way I see it, sitting to pee (at home) is easier and more pleasant than cleaning up urine on my hands and knees.

However - I would never do it anywhere else. I am NOT touching a toilet seat outside my house unelss I am desperate to take a dump, and might die if I don't




, now that really explains alot........
Link Posted: 10/3/2004 2:18:21 PM EST
I think you should have made a poll/survey post out of this.

Do you prefer to pee:

() Standing

() Sitting

Personally, I only sit to pee if I'm in my own house, although I wish I had a urinal too. Outside my home, standing only.
Link Posted: 10/3/2004 2:21:20 PM EST
When in the ...um....library, I do most of my reading sitting down. That is the most peace I ever get. Fully stocked with gun books, woodworking books, etc.
Link Posted: 10/3/2004 2:27:08 PM EST
Hey it's a shot in the dark ya know?

You just let loose and hope to hear some contact with water...

If not

Link Posted: 10/3/2004 2:27:37 PM EST

Originally Posted By VoodooChile:

What I really like about this is that he was drunk and obnoxious at the last Christmas Party..I think I'll have to file this little factoid away for a few months.



Really rub it in and get him some of these.

www.magic-cone.com

"If you feel uncomfortable sitting on public toilets, Magic Cone is the best solution".





(actually, it sounds like some of you guys posting in this thread could use some of these yourselves).
Link Posted: 10/3/2004 2:28:56 PM EST

Originally Posted By dport:
Wow, if you can't aim your own equipment that you've practiced with your whole life, I'd hate to see you shoot an AR-15.



Sometimes the "crown" is messed up and the "ammo" does not shoot where you want it.
Link Posted: 10/3/2004 2:30:11 PM EST
i bet a woman would freak hearing the sound of someone standing while pissing in a womans bathroom.

great illistrations.

Link Posted: 10/3/2004 2:30:20 PM EST
Show on PBS a few years ago about bathroom fixtures. The person hosting said the worst germ maker was a man standing to urinate. He said it splashes all over the place. I sit when urinating at home or at someone elses house..
Gerry
Link Posted: 10/3/2004 2:31:14 PM EST

Originally Posted By Kamikazi:

Originally Posted By dport:
Wow, if you can't aim your own equipment that you've practiced with your whole life, I'd hate to see you shoot an AR-15.



Sometimes the "crown" is messed up and the "ammo" does not shoot where you want it.



Or sometimes the "bore" has an obstruction resulting in a "spray fire".
Link Posted: 10/3/2004 2:34:14 PM EST

Originally Posted By DrFrige:
The following is true.

I was at a customer's house and I was dancing the PP jig pretty good. I asked the customer if I may use his bathroom. He was an ass to start with. He said "Sure.... but dont stand"... I said "Excuse me?"

He said "When a man stands to urinate, it sprays all over the place"

I told him "Then you know what, I will be right back... I dont need anyone to tell me how to piss so to respect your home, I will go to the local Mc Donalds"




If he ever says that to movers it will be the last time. One will kindly agree with his rules then proceed to "upper deck" his tank. Not that I used to be a mover or know people who performed said "upper deck" procedure.
Link Posted: 10/3/2004 2:43:31 PM EST

Originally Posted By LoginName:



Who's turned on from looking at this picture?
Link Posted: 10/3/2004 2:45:02 PM EST

Originally Posted By DK-Prof:
I often sit down to pee at my own house.

If I had some servant or live-in-slave who cleaned up my filth after me, I would definitely stand, but I live by myself, and I want a clean house. The way I see it, sitting to pee (at home) is easier and more pleasant than cleaning up urine on my hands and knees.

However - I would never do it anywhere else. I am NOT touching a toilet seat outside my house unelss I am desperate to take a dump, and might die if I don't



Do you also use a BIDAY[sp?] (that French ass squirter machine) ? My brother's old house had one and I pissed in it by accident.
Link Posted: 10/3/2004 2:46:27 PM EST

Originally Posted By Javak:

Originally Posted By LoginName:
www.magic-cone.com/image1.jpg



Who's turned on from looking at this picture?



LMAO!!

Link Posted: 10/3/2004 2:49:34 PM EST
[Last Edit: 10/3/2004 2:50:52 PM EST by Gloftoe]

Originally Posted By ger42:
Show on PBS a few years ago about bathroom fixtures. The person hosting said the worst germ maker was a man standing to urinate. He said it splashes all over the place. I sit when urinating at home or at someone elses house..
Gerry



Urine is sterile.

What's next? Men sticking their foot in the toilet, and pissing down their leg so as to not disturb their wife/girlfriend/S.O.?! (credit to whoever told me that). Goddammit. Stand up and piss, you're a man for fuck's sake!
Link Posted: 10/3/2004 2:51:42 PM EST

Originally Posted By LoginName:

Originally Posted By Kamikazi:

Originally Posted By dport:
Wow, if you can't aim your own equipment that you've practiced with your whole life, I'd hate to see you shoot an AR-15.



Sometimes the "crown" is messed up and the "ammo" does not shoot where you want it.



Or sometimes the "bore" has an obstruction resulting in a "spray fire".



The "post-coital clog?"...dang I hate when that happens!
Link Posted: 10/3/2004 2:53:22 PM EST

Originally Posted By badeffect10:
I hope your ready to hand over your man card.




I think I turned that in already when I got my vasectomy
Link Posted: 10/3/2004 2:54:41 PM EST

Originally Posted By MrClean4Hire:

Originally Posted By DK-Prof:
I often sit down to pee at my own house.

If I had some servant or live-in-slave who cleaned up my filth after me, I would definitely stand, but I live by myself, and I want a clean house. The way I see it, sitting to pee (at home) is easier and more pleasant than cleaning up urine on my hands and knees.
However - I would never do it anywhere else. I am NOT touching a toilet seat outside my house unelss I am desperate to take a dump, and might die if I don't



I would not have shared that



Nor would I.
Link Posted: 10/3/2004 3:48:03 PM EST
I think you're ignorant as hell if you stand to piss in your own toilet.

You either have some piss cleaning fetish, or your toilet is covered in piss splatter.

So since I don't have a fetish for cleaning up piss, don't want my bathroom covered in piss splatter, and don't expect my wife or kids to be cleaning up my piss, then I'm less of a man since I don't stand to drain my dragon? (and I don't want to clean up after my boys either)

That's retarded. Period.

I don't stand at friend's houses either. I didn't come over to their house to provide the gift of a piss splattered bathroom. You can't "aim" piss splatter.

Again - retarded.

Call me a metro if you want, but you'll be way off base. (clears nose onto the floor)
Link Posted: 10/3/2004 3:55:59 PM EST
[Last Edit: 10/3/2004 3:58:07 PM EST by 199]
Slightly off topic, but …

About 15 years ago my county library system built a new library with politically correct (for the time) uni-sex rest rooms. These were maybe a half dozen or so small rooms with just a toilet and a sink.

AFAIK, they’ve never built another one like that.

Just a guess, but I suspect they had a lot of complaints!!
Link Posted: 10/3/2004 4:00:02 PM EST
I tell the wife and girls to put the seat back up when their done..
end of problem
Link Posted: 10/3/2004 4:02:34 PM EST

Originally Posted By AvengeR15:
If you pee outdoors exclusively, there will be no mess to clean up.




That's funny, sometimes during the winter, I piss behind my garage. I just like to piss in the cold sometimes. It must be a primal thing.
Link Posted: 10/3/2004 4:17:20 PM EST
Holy shit, some of you guys actually sit down to pee by choice? The only time I've ever sat down to take a leak is when I'm dropping the kids off at the pool.

I piss in my backyard. When my buddies come over and drink all of my beer, I encourage them to piss in my backyard. Better than screwing up my bathroom.

I swear to you, I'm going to install a urinal in my garage.

This is a fascinating topic. How do you guys splatter piss all over the place? Aim for God's sake! Don't give 'er all she's got! Ease up a bit, take 'er easy, stand up and take a leak like a man, damnit.

Shit, my wife is sitting here with me and SHE says she'd stand up if she could. Jesus Christ...
Link Posted: 10/3/2004 5:21:44 PM EST

Originally Posted By DK-Prof:

Originally Posted By MrClean4Hire:

I would not have shared that




Standing, sitting, in the shower - I can do all of them




Versatility! I sit to pee in the morning sometimes when I'm hung over and I pee in the shower to save time.
Link Posted: 10/3/2004 5:24:15 PM EST
[Last Edit: 10/3/2004 5:24:26 PM EST by DK-Prof]

Originally Posted By SubnetMask:


This is a fascinating topic. How do you guys splatter piss all over the place? Aim for God's sake! Don't give 'er all she's got! Ease up a bit, take 'er easy, stand up and take a leak like a man, damnit.

Shit, my wife is sitting here with me and SHE says she'd stand up if she could. Jesus Christ...




Since you obviously pee with such laser-like precisions, I challenge you to go to your bathroom right now, and lick the outside of the bowl, and the tile around the toilet.

Link Posted: 10/3/2004 5:30:37 PM EST

Originally Posted By DK-Prof:

Originally Posted By SubnetMask:


This is a fascinating topic. How do you guys splatter piss all over the place? Aim for God's sake! Don't give 'er all she's got! Ease up a bit, take 'er easy, stand up and take a leak like a man, damnit.

Shit, my wife is sitting here with me and SHE says she'd stand up if she could. Jesus Christ...




Since you obviously pee with such laser-like precisions, I challenge you to go to your bathroom right now, and lick the outside of the bowl, and the tile around the toilet.




Ever piss wearing shorts? You can feel the splash.
Link Posted: 10/3/2004 5:36:57 PM EST
If you have ever peed with shorts on, you'd know how much it splatters, 'cause you can feel it hitting your legs. I just try to aim right above the water line at the back of the toilet, under the rimhat.

YMMV

Link Posted: 10/3/2004 5:37:48 PM EST
[Last Edit: 10/3/2004 5:38:45 PM EST by Stokes]
Link Posted: 10/3/2004 5:41:33 PM EST
[Last Edit: 10/3/2004 5:42:04 PM EST by kill-9]

Originally Posted By SubnetMask:
stand up and take a leak like a man, damnit.



+1
Link Posted: 10/3/2004 5:44:21 PM EST

Originally Posted By Stokes:

Originally Posted By Stillie:

If he ever says that to movers it will be the last time. One will kindly agree with his rules then proceed to "upper deck" his tank. Not that I used to be a mover or know people who performed said "upper deck" procedure.



If you don't have the nerve to upper deck it, you could always dry dock one. Then they have to bend down and get their face right next to it to turn the water back on.




DRY DOCK!!!!!!!!! Never heard of that!!
Link Posted: 10/3/2004 6:34:36 PM EST

Originally Posted By AvengeR15:
If you pee outdoors exclusively, there will be no mess to clean up.


+1 !
Link Posted: 10/3/2004 6:59:53 PM EST
Sometimes when I come home drunk and I have to sit down and piss. The only reason is because it takes so long and my legs won't stay still and support my weight for that long...
Link Posted: 10/3/2004 7:06:17 PM EST
Stand to piss, your too too drunk to aim thats what going outside or in the shower is for
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