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Posted: 7/3/2012 8:23:46 PM EST
I fired off a message on a dating site the other day to a guy who has a 3 year old little boy, and he writes back:

"Nice to meet you.  Maybe we can meet for dinner sometime if you like.   If you don't mind I bring my son hes a big part of my life.  Looking forward to hearing from you"


Now, I like kids, even little ones like this and it doesn't sound like the mother of the little guy is too much in his life, but geeeez.......bringing your little boy on a FIRST date???   REALLY????     This guy is just over 50 years old, and so I am sure having a 3 year old he is an older, possibly protective dad. ––-but the thing is, a first date is all about TRYING to get to know someone new, and with a toddler there, it would be all about the child.––-most guys my age are grandparents already.  

Most guys are a little reserved when it comes to their dates meeting the kids (and I am sure you single/divorced guys on here who have kids are the same way)....and that I do get, and fully support.   If I had kids I would NOT want them meeting my dates until I know it is going to go somewhere.  

Link Posted: 7/3/2012 8:25:17 PM EST
[#1]
are you my new mommy?
 
Link Posted: 7/3/2012 8:25:21 PM EST
[#2]
A 50-year old with a 3-year old child?  Hmm..
Link Posted: 7/3/2012 8:27:58 PM EST
[#3]
Bail.

Posted Via AR15.Com Mobile
Link Posted: 7/3/2012 8:28:19 PM EST
[#4]
He is being very upfront with you.

The kid probably comes in first place in his life.
He comes in second.
If you are very lucky, you might come in third (unless there is someone else).

If this is not what you want, move on.
Link Posted: 7/3/2012 8:28:28 PM EST
[#5]
Quoted:
A 50-year old with a 3-year old child?  Hmm..

yeah his profile says he is "single" and not divorced so I suspect this is a product with a much younger woman.......an "ooops.....we forgot the B/C type thing".......

I guess I need to find out more........

I am 51 and not sure I am ready for a 3 year old........but then again, I never got to have kids.   I like grown up kids!!!!  ––-and grandbabies you can hand back to the parents!!!  
Link Posted: 7/3/2012 8:28:28 PM EST
[#6]
Quoted:
I fired off a message on a dating site the other day to a guy who has a 3 year old little boy, and he writes back:

"Nice to meet you.  Maybe we can meet for dinner sometime if you like.   If you don't mind I bring my son hes a big part of my life.  Looking forward to hearing from you"


Now, I like kids, even little ones like this and it doesn't sound like the mother of the little guy is too much in his life, but geeeez.......bringing your little boy on a FIRST date???   REALLY????     This guy is just over 50 years old, and so I am sure having a 3 year old he is an older, possibly protective dad. ––-but the thing is, a first date is all about TRYING to get to know someone new, and with a toddler there, it would be all about the child.––-most guys my age are grandparents already.  

Most guys are a little reserved when it comes to their dates meeting the kids (and I am sure you single/divorced guys on here who have kids are the same way)....and that I do get, and fully support.   If I had kids I would NOT want them meeting my dates until I know it is going to go somewhere.  




See that's the cool thing about being a man, we can have kids forever- just throwing that seed all around, skeet skeet skeet, bringing my three year old to the picnic, it's all good.
Link Posted: 7/3/2012 8:30:07 PM EST
[#7]
"If you do not mind if I bring my ex-husband, he is on work release."
 
Link Posted: 7/3/2012 8:31:20 PM EST
[#8]
Quoted:
"If you do not mind if I bring my ex-husband, he is on work release."  

you win!!!!  

Link Posted: 7/3/2012 8:31:29 PM EST
[#9]
I have a similar story.  


I was 31, she was 29.     Apparently "If you're free Friday night, how'd you like to come over, watch some TV, and i can give you that massage you've been talking about" means "come over with your daughter, we'll turn on netflix/Fraggle Rock so she stops screaming, and you can leave in 45 minutes because she's an unholy terror.


Second Date FAIL.
Link Posted: 7/3/2012 8:35:06 PM EST
[#10]
Quoted:
I have a similar story.  


I was 31, she was 29.     Apparently "If you're free Friday night, how'd you like to come over, watch some TV, and i can give you that massage you've been talking about" means "come over with your daughter, we'll turn on netflix/Fraggle Rock so she stops screaming, and you can leave in 45 minutes because she's an unholy terror.


Second Date FAIL.


Lmao thats awesome!! Why do people not realize how stupid they are???
Link Posted: 7/3/2012 8:36:06 PM EST
[#11]




You should be honored.  He could be dating younger, more self absorbed women, but instead he is offering to date a more mature, open minded woman.  
I'm betting that he has been around enough that this might be his way of cutting through the bullshit.  "This is who I am, take it or leave it"




He's in a target rich environment and he knows it.  He will eventually find an attractive woman that's interested in being a foster Mom.





It sounds like you don't want a small child in your life, so just tell him.




 
Link Posted: 7/3/2012 8:36:24 PM EST
[#12]
On to the next one.
Link Posted: 7/3/2012 8:37:47 PM EST
[#13]
Red flags dear, red flags.
Link Posted: 7/3/2012 8:39:22 PM EST
[#14]
Link Posted: 7/3/2012 8:40:59 PM EST
[#15]
That is odd.
Link Posted: 7/3/2012 8:41:14 PM EST
[#16]
lol
Link Posted: 7/3/2012 8:41:55 PM EST
[#17]
Quoted:
I have a similar story.  


I was 31, she was 29.     Apparently "If you're free Friday night, how'd you like to come over, watch some TV, and i can give you that massage you've been talking about" means "come over with your daughter, we'll turn on netflix/Fraggle Rock so she stops screaming, and you can leave in 45 minutes because she's an unholy terror.


Second Date FAIL.


Call me shallow but I would have have told her "no" and shut the door in her face.
Link Posted: 7/3/2012 8:42:24 PM EST
[#18]
You have to kiss a lot of frogs to find your prince
Link Posted: 7/3/2012 8:46:53 PM EST
[#19]
Quoted:
He is being very upfront with you.

The kid probably comes in first place in his life.
He comes in second.
If you are very lucky, you might come in third (unless there is someone else).

If this is not what you want, move on.


This. He is letting you know up front what's up.

Posted Via AR15.Com Mobile
Link Posted: 7/3/2012 8:51:07 PM EST
[#20]
Only reason daughter knows the most recent woman I've gone out with a few times is because we met as coaches for the softball team our daughters were on.  And our daughters are all 16 and up (we both have 16 year olds, she also has an 18 year old daughter).   Only reason daughter even knows I've been on other dates is she made a comment that I needed to get over her mother and get out to meet women, I laughed at her and told her I was already doing that, I just wasn't telling her when I went out on dates (nice thing about having a kid old enough to take care of herself :) ).
 
Link Posted: 7/3/2012 9:11:10 PM EST
[#21]
whoah....at first I thought the OP was a dude...


Then I saw OP's callsign
Link Posted: 7/3/2012 9:17:24 PM EST
[#22]
I agree he's just being upfront.  Your reaction to this is important to him.  That you are not happy means he doesn't have to waste his time with you.

Link Posted: 7/3/2012 9:20:20 PM EST
[#23]
Messed up.  Run away.
 
Link Posted: 7/3/2012 9:20:42 PM EST
[#24]
Know when to pull the handles...
Link Posted: 7/3/2012 9:22:36 PM EST
[#25]
At least he didn't offer to show you his toy collection.
Link Posted: 7/3/2012 9:22:36 PM EST
[#26]
Quoted:
Quoted:
I fired off a message on a dating site the other day to a guy who has a 3 year old little boy, and he writes back:

"Nice to meet you.  Maybe we can meet for dinner sometime if you like.   If you don't mind I bring my son hes a big part of my life.  Looking forward to hearing from you"


Now, I like kids, even little ones like this and it doesn't sound like the mother of the little guy is too much in his life, but geeeez.......bringing your little boy on a FIRST date???   REALLY????     This guy is just over 50 years old, and so I am sure having a 3 year old he is an older, possibly protective dad. ––-but the thing is, a first date is all about TRYING to get to know someone new, and with a toddler there, it would be all about the child.––-most guys my age are grandparents already.  

Most guys are a little reserved when it comes to their dates meeting the kids (and I am sure you single/divorced guys on here who have kids are the same way)....and that I do get, and fully support.   If I had kids I would NOT want them meeting my dates until I know it is going to go somewhere.  




See that's the cool thing about being a man, we can have kids forever- just throwing that seed all around, skeet skeet skeet, bringing my three year old to the picnic, it's all good.


Classic
Link Posted: 7/3/2012 9:30:13 PM EST
[#27]
Usually it's the women that say the kid is a "big part of my life" which translates to "I'm a single mom with no job and nobody to watch this kid so I don't have a life anymore".
Link Posted: 7/3/2012 9:56:08 PM EST
[#28]
Quoted:
I fired off a message on a dating site the other day to a guy who has a 3 year old little boy, and he writes back:

"Nice to meet you.  Maybe we can meet for dinner sometime if you like.   If you don't mind I bring my son hes a big part of my life.  Looking forward to hearing from you"


Now, I like kids, even little ones like this and it doesn't sound like the mother of the little guy is too much in his life, but geeeez.......bringing your little boy on a FIRST date???   REALLY????     This guy is just over 50 years old, and so I am sure having a 3 year old he is an older, possibly protective dad. ––-but the thing is, a first date is all about TRYING to get to know someone new, and with a toddler there, it would be all about the child.––-most guys my age are grandparents already.  

Most guys are a little reserved when it comes to their dates meeting the kids (and I am sure you single/divorced guys on here who have kids are the same way)....and that I do get, and fully support.   If I had kids I would NOT want them meeting my dates until I know it is going to go somewhere.  





Hell, I'll go for it!

55, married. 2 kids, 6 grandkids, but I won't bring any of 'em with me. Wanna meet for lunch at the motel 6 on I20 in Greenville, MS, or LA, or TX in the next 2 or 3 months?

Link Posted: 7/3/2012 10:00:11 PM EST
[#29]
Talk about a cock blocker.
Link Posted: 7/3/2012 10:13:46 PM EST
[#30]
If the OP had played her cards right, she could have gotten herself a nice evening at Chuck E Cheese.  Free pizza, and I bet he would have sprung for some tokens for his date.

OP, you missed a damn god time.
Link Posted: 7/3/2012 10:22:02 PM EST
[#31]
You marry someone with kids you are now a parent to those kids. If he is shopping for someone that is marriage material it is a pretty decent strategy to narrow the herd to those willing to take on that kind of responsibility.
 
Link Posted: 7/3/2012 10:33:35 PM EST
[#32]
What if his son is a special needs kid and he needs to bring him around?

Just be up front with him.
Link Posted: 7/3/2012 10:51:52 PM EST
[#33]
Link Posted: 7/3/2012 10:52:01 PM EST
[#34]
Quoted:
What if his son is a special needs kid and he needs to bring him around?

Just be up front with him.


Having a child with special needs does not preclude hiring a babysitter.
Link Posted: 7/3/2012 11:07:49 PM EST
[#35]
You don't bring your damn kids on a first date.  Sheesh, what's wrong with people.



I'd take you out if I wasn't already dating a cougar.  (I've seen your BODT )  I think she would be pretty pissed losing her cub
Link Posted: 7/3/2012 11:11:53 PM EST
[#36]
Quoted:
Quoted:
What if his son is a special needs kid and he needs to bring him around?

Just be up front with him.


Having a child with special needs does not preclude hiring a babysitter.


Sometimes it does.  If the child is autistic, for example, or has any condition which requires a set routine.

ETA: Army vet friend of mine has an autistic son and he brings him everywhere.

He was fortunate enough to get involved with someone that didn't hang up on that.

YMMV
Link Posted: 7/4/2012 12:00:38 AM EST
[#37]
Quoted:
whoah....at first I thought the OP was a dude...


Then I saw OP's callsign

Ñope!!  All female here.  I've met a few ARF folks.  NoloContendre is one.  
Link Posted: 7/4/2012 12:05:26 AM EST
[#38]
Quoted:
If the OP had played her cards right, she could have gotten herself a nice evening at Chuck E Cheese.  Free pizza, and I bet he would have sprung for some tokens for his date.

OP, you missed a damn god time.
funny you mention that!!!  Chuck E Cheese was the first thing that popped into my head!!  I suppose I could get a good show in as well.  Sesame Street on ice!!
Link Posted: 7/4/2012 12:24:01 AM EST
[#39]
Quoted:
Apparently "If you're free Friday night, how'd you like to come over, watch some TV, and i can give you that massage you've been talking about" means "come over with your daughter, we'll turn on netflix/Fraggle Rock so she stops screaming, and you can leave in 45 minutes because she's an unholy terror.

Second Date FAIL.


That was her way of making sure nothing happened.
Just a guess on my part.
Link Posted: 7/4/2012 12:30:45 AM EST
[#40]
Quoted:
Bail.

Posted Via AR15.Com Mobile


Link Posted: 7/4/2012 1:13:15 AM EST
[#41]
Hi,ATLPaeachGirl, your profile is awesome.
Do you mind if I bring my Honey Badger (Don't worry Waffle House is cool with service animals)? He's my life coach
Link Posted: 7/4/2012 1:27:04 AM EST
[#42]



Quoted:


Hi,ATLPaeachGirl, your profile is awesome.

Do you mind if I bring my Honey Badger (Don't worry Waffle House is cool with service animals)? He's my life coach

http://www.forkparty.com/wp-content/uploads/2011/04/Honey-Badger-Buster.jpg


Waffle House on a first date?



Why drop that kind of cash on a first date?



Get some coupons and head to BK Lounge.



 
Link Posted: 7/4/2012 1:40:24 AM EST
[#43]


Are you kidding? Babysitters are expensive!!!

Sounds like he's not sure you're worth the ten bucks an hour.


Link Posted: 7/4/2012 1:41:19 AM EST
[#44]
I'm very happy in my marriage, and I love my two step-kids. But...

If I ever found myself single again, I'd never seriously date a woman with kids again. It is the most difficult dynamic I've ever dealt with.
Link Posted: 7/4/2012 1:41:56 AM EST
[#45]
Quoted:
Quoted:
A 50-year old with a 3-year old child?  Hmm..

yeah his profile says he is "single" and not divorced so I suspect this is a product with a much younger woman.......an "ooops.....we forgot the B/C type thing".......

I guess I need to find out more........

I am 51 and not sure I am ready for a 3 year old........but then again, I never got to have kids.   I like grown up kids!!!!  ––-and grandbabies you can hand back to the parents!!!  


That statement right there tells me you should bail. No offense but any one who is not sure. And never had kids. Is not gonna be happy with a 3 year old running around. For the record I took my than 7 year old  girl on a first date. That woman is snoring next to me right now. We had talked on line. I made it clear about the fact that my kid comes first. She also had kids and understood. We celebrate 6 years this month.
Link Posted: 7/4/2012 1:46:50 AM EST
[#46]
I think it's fucked up and I wouldn't be a part of any meeting with his child in attendance just yet.  I talk to several guys who meet a woman's kids on the 2nd or 3rd date, and I think that's way too soon, too.
Link Posted: 7/4/2012 1:50:31 AM EST
[#47]
Bail on this guy peach.

On the other hand, my kids are grown.

Link Posted: 7/4/2012 1:55:08 AM EST
[#48]
Link Posted: 7/4/2012 2:17:49 AM EST
[#49]
I don't introduce the women I date to my 7 year old son and I would certainly never bring him on a first date.
Link Posted: 7/4/2012 2:23:14 AM EST
[#50]
Time to play a game of Ding, Dong, Ditch...run girl.
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