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9/22/2017 12:11:25 AM
Posted: 9/20/2005 10:32:00 AM EDT
A blonde was sitting on the train reading the newspaper. The headline blared, "12 Brazilian Soldiers Killed."

She shook her head at the sad news, then turned to the stranger sitting next to her and asked, "How many is a Brazilian?"
Link Posted: 9/20/2005 10:33:22 AM EDT
A blonde walks into a bar . . . and she wakes up in the hospital with a concussion.
Link Posted: 9/20/2005 10:33:43 AM EDT
Good one!!
Link Posted: 9/20/2005 10:33:54 AM EDT
Not bad.
Link Posted: 9/20/2005 10:34:19 AM EDT
What do you call a blonde behind the steering wheel? an Air Bag!
Link Posted: 9/20/2005 10:37:02 AM EDT




Link Posted: 9/20/2005 10:38:59 AM EDT
A police officer responds to a call about a car crash. He walks up to the car, which is folded around a tree, and he finds a redhead in the driver's seat. She seemed OK.
"What happened?" asked the officer.
"I was driving along, when suddenly this tree pops up out of nowhere! I swerved to miss it, but then there was another tree! I swerved the other way, and there was another one! Finally I lost control and crashed."
"Tell me, do you dye your hair?"
"Why, yes, I'm actually a blonde."
"I thought so. You were dodging your air freshener."
Link Posted: 9/20/2005 10:40:39 AM EDT
A blonde, a brunette, and a redhead are sitting in a third grade class - which one has the better body?

The blonde. She's 18.
Link Posted: 9/20/2005 10:49:32 AM EDT
Link Posted: 9/20/2005 11:25:38 AM EDT

Originally Posted By Old_Painless:
A blonde was sitting on the train reading the newspaper. The headline blared, "12 Brazilian Soldiers Killed."

She shook her head at the sad news, then turned to the stranger sitting next to her and asked, "How many is a Brazilian?"



I hadn't heard that one.
Link Posted: 9/20/2005 11:35:28 AM EDT
My (blond) wife will get a kick out of that one.

(She likes lawyer jokes too, even though she is one. )
Link Posted: 9/20/2005 11:39:00 AM EDT
A blonde police officer pulls over a blonde in a convertible sports car speeding. She walks over to the car and asks the blonde driver for some for I.D.

The blonde convertible driver searches through her purse in vain.
Finally she asks, "What does it look like?"
The blonde police officer tells her, "It's that thing with your picture on it."

The blonde driver searches for a few more seconds, pulls out her compact, opens it, and sure enough sees her picture.

She hands the compact to the blonde cop. The blonde cop looks at the compact for a few seconds, then rolls her eyes, hands the compact back to the blonde convertible driver, and says, "If you had told me you were a police officer when I first pulled you over, we could have avoided this whole thing!
Link Posted: 9/20/2005 11:40:37 AM EDT
Look at the rascism in this thread! You all are blonde-o-phobes, oppressing a minority that deserves special protection.
Link Posted: 9/20/2005 12:04:06 PM EDT
A guy was out in his yard doing some mowing and weedeating. He noticed his next door blonde neighbor come out to her mailbox and open the door and look inside. She looked puzzled and shut the door and went back inside the house. About 5 minutes later she came back out and did the same. Another 5 minutes later and she came back out and did this another 4 times. Finally, after seeing all this the nextdoor neighbor walked over and asked her what was going on. Her reply was, "every time I turn on the computer it says "you've got mail"!"
Link Posted: 9/20/2005 1:17:04 PM EDT
[Last Edit: 9/20/2005 1:17:40 PM EDT by cruze5]

Originally Posted By TexasEd:
A blonde police officer pulls over a blonde in a convertible sports car speeding. etc etc




Link Posted: 9/20/2005 1:22:29 PM EDT

Originally Posted By KlubMarcus:
Look at the rascism in this thread! You all are blonde-o-phobes, oppressing a minority that deserves special protection.



That is very true...if any hot blondes need some refuge, my door is always open...
Link Posted: 9/20/2005 7:07:31 PM EDT
A blond hates the fact that everyone thinks she's dumb, so she takes it upon herself to memorize the state capitals to show how smart she is.

The next time someone calls her dumb she announces that she's no dummy that she knows the capitals of every state.

Her accuser decides to test her on this so he says "So what's the capital of Wyoming?"

The blond closes her eyes while thinking intently and then announces "I know it!! It's 'W' "

Link Posted: 9/20/2005 7:12:44 PM EDT
A man at an alligator farm put his balls in a gator's mouth
and let the gator chomp down. After a minute he took a glass
jar and smashed it over the gator's head, which made it release
it's toothy grip on his nuts.

After looking into the audience the man said, "is there anyone
in the audience who is willing to try that?"

After a minute of silence a cute blond in the back raised her hand
and said, "I'll try it, but you can't hit me on the head with a jar."

Link Posted: 9/20/2005 7:21:45 PM EDT
My true-blond wife loves it, O_P!



HH
Link Posted: 9/20/2005 7:26:24 PM EDT
All great ones guys!
Link Posted: 9/20/2005 7:28:10 PM EDT
how do you drown a blond....... scratch and sniff on the bottom of a pool

whats the difference between a blond and a cloths washer..... the washer does not follow you around for a week after you drop a load in it

Link Posted: 9/20/2005 7:30:40 PM EDT
Link Posted: 9/20/2005 8:11:55 PM EDT
What does a blonde call a blow job in a Honda?

Her Civic duty!
hahahahahahaha!
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