Here's a case the Colorado Court of Appeals just handed down today ass raping a guy in a huge, major way.

LINKY

The couple was wealthy, but only because the husband's family left a lot of property to husband and this property appreciated during the marriage.    Note the biased way the Court describes this, saying:  "wife explained that the case involved assets worth millions of dollars . . . many of these assets came from husband’s parents. . ."    That's a shorthand way of saying that many of those assets were bequeathed to husband when his folks died, or gifted to him over the years individually.   In Colorado, like most states, inheritance and gifts are separate property of the spouse that receives them, but APPRECIATION on those things becomes joint marital property.  

The wife worked every day doing a horse boarding operation at the couple's ranch, but once she filed divorce she, you know, claimed she couldn't actually go out and get a job doing that.   She was awarded spousal support as if it would be impossible for her to earn a wage .

In a lesson for all those guys who give their spouse an "allowance" each month, be prepared for that to become the floor for alimony, as that's what happened here.   Husband was ordered to pay his wife $3000 a month in maintenance.    I would suspect that her "allowance" -- given she was a homemaker -- also included HIS food costs and other joint housekeeping expenses, but you will see they didn't do anything with that.

Moreover, dude was ordered by the court to ADVANCE $150,000.00 to prepay his ex-spouses attorneys' fees war-chest and the cost of appraising all that property.

She's stealing from his family legacy, money and things his parents handed down to him.   A prenuptial agreement would very easily have taken care of this issue, by providing that separate property AND appreciation on separate property remains the property of the spouse that receives it.

This lady did one MAJOR thing right.   You'll see that the case is in Garfield county, and that's where the Husband's lawyer was from.   But the wife hired Bill Hunnicutt, one of the "huge guns" out of Denver.   And the Husband is getting PWN3D quite mightily.

So, lets review:

1.   Don't treat your spouse like a teenager with an allowance.  Even if you're a sole breadwinner and she's a homemaker, come up with a different mechanism for each of the spouses' folding money.   I like separate accounts and a single "bill paying" account where both spouses earn a wage.

2.   PRENUP  PRENUP PRENUP!    Get one.   A good one.

3.   Hire the best lawyer in the state, because if you don't she will.  If your wife brings in a big gun you're already two strikes down, as she's got that and the biased laws on her side.

I didn't get raped this badly in my divorce, but my spousal support was about that much each month (roughly 63% of my take home pay, plus there was child support).

That is a stright kick to the nuts.

Child support is one thing but I've always felt alimony was the most fucked up thing ever.

And this one is nothing folks...

... I had to subpoena the divorce papers of a big gun cancer doctor in Colorado.   His take home pay was $75,000.00 PER MONTH.

His ALIMONY payable to his wife (who left him, surprise surprise, for someone who wasn't so busy) was $37,500.00 per month.   And it lasted for TWENTY YEARS.  

The only good thing about alimony is that the dude gets to deduct the alimony from income on his taxes, and the wife has to pay taxes on it.   But dayum, that's the screwing you'll get for the screwing you got, for sure.  

Every guy who wants to get married should go sit in the back of a divorce court for an afternoon.

I've been divorced for 13 years now. My ex is in the process of taking me back to court right now for the 20th time. No shit.

My running-tally legal bill is a bit over $654,000.

It's one of those things you just can't believe until it happens to you. Sometimes it's hard to believe even while it's happening.

Every day I see more examples as to why government should get out of the marriage business.

They've screwed it up, just like the screw up almost everything else.

Quoted: Every guy who wants to get married should go sit in the back of a divorce court for an afternoon. I've been divorced for 13 years now. My ex is in the process of taking me back to court right now for the 20th time. No shit. My running-tally legal bill is a bit over $654,000. It's one of those things you just can't believe until it happens to you. Sometimes it's hard to believe even while it's happening.

I've read this before but forgot-  for what is she taking you back to court all these times? Alimony? Child support???

Quoted: Every guy who wants to get married should go sit in the back of a divorce court for an afternoon. I've been divorced for 13 years now. My ex is in the process of taking me back to court right now for the 20th time. No shit. My running-tally legal bill is a bit over $654,000. It's one of those things you just can't believe until it happens to you. Sometimes it's hard to believe even while it's happening.

Fucking, OUCH, dude.

Quoted: Every day I see more examples as to why government should get out of the marriage business. They've screwed it up, just like the screw up almost everything else.

A big +1 to that.

Quoted: Every guy who wants to get married should go sit in the back of a divorce court for an afternoon. <Snip>

That's the honest truth.

The best prenup is not to get, er, "nupted".  It blows my mind that men are still getting married at all.

Quoted: Quoted: Every guy who wants to get married should go sit in the back of a divorce court for an afternoon. I've been divorced for 13 years now. My ex is in the process of taking me back to court right now for the 20th time. No shit. My running-tally legal bill is a bit over $654,000. It's one of those things you just can't believe until it happens to you. Sometimes it's hard to believe even while it's happening. I've read this before but forgot-  for what is she taking you back to court all these times? Alimony? Child support???

She wants more child support, child support to continue while the kids are in college, a court order for me to sell the house I've been building and to use the proceeds to pay for "all post-secondary expenses without limit", and for the court to find me in contempt (although she's graciously offering to accept "punitive damages in lieu of incarceration".  

i wonder what % of recruits for the french foreign legion are just guys who got shafted in their divorce and don't want to spend the rest of their lives as slaves to their ex-wives.

Maybe if you marry the right person in the first place this would not happen.

This is what happens when you marry somebody with no morals or scruples.

CRC

Quoted: Quoted: Quoted: Every guy who wants to get married should go sit in the back of a divorce court for an afternoon. I've been divorced for 13 years now. My ex is in the process of taking me back to court right now for the 20th time. No shit. My running-tally legal bill is a bit over $654,000. It's one of those things you just can't believe until it happens to you. Sometimes it's hard to believe even while it's happening. I've read this before but forgot-  for what is she taking you back to court all these times? Alimony? Child support??? She wants more child support, child support to continue while the kids are in college, a court order for me to sell the house I've been building and to use the proceeds to pay for "all post-secondary expenses without limit", and for the court to find me in contempt (although she's graciously offering to accept "punitive damages in lieu of incarceration".

Sounds like she just wants to ruin your life.

Quoted: She wants more child support, child support to continue while the kids are in college, a court order for me to sell the house I've been building and to use the proceeds to pay for "all post-secondary expenses without limit", and for the court to find me in contempt (although she's graciously offering to accept "punitive damages in lieu of incarceration".

Sometimes hit men are cheaper.

Quoted: Maybe if you marry the right person in the first place this would not happen. This is what happens when you marry somebody with no morals or scruples. CRC

Oh please.

This is why you shouldn't will property to children if you are concerned about this.  Instead, will it to a corporation that only direct decendants can become parteneners of.  If there is no ability to sell the individual membership, then the property has no value to the individual.  Lifetime membership only revocable by 100% approval by memebers.  No buy out options.  Property can only be sold to members by 100% proxy.

My brother's wife's family did this with their property in Michigan to prevent this very thing from happening.  It works.  It should.  Her father and mother were both judges.

Quoted: Quoted: Maybe if you marry the right person in the first place this would not happen. This is what happens when you marry somebody with no morals or scruples. CRC Oh please.

For once I agree with you. They all seem like "the right one" until you get married...

or so I've heard.

motown(thehappilysingle)steve

Only the lucky ones get the same woman they married, most of the time you probably can't predict it.  That can go both ways of course but how many women pay their ex-husbands thousands a month in alimony?

Quoted: Maybe if you marry the right person in the first place this would not happen. This is what happens when you marry somebody with no morals or scruples. CRC

Hey have one that turns Bi-Ploar 7 or 9 years into the deal!!

I am in the middle of a Divorce right now - and will be glad when it is over!!

Later,

Badredfish

Marriage is a union between God and the man and the woman.

It's a Judeo-Christian institution.

You need to seek God's guidance in getting married.

Quoted: Marriage is a union between God and the man and the woman. It's a Judeo-Christian institution. You need to seek God's guidance in getting married.

It's nothing but a legal contract, and the contract says that if either one of you ever wants to stop playing house then she gets some lovely parting gifts.

Quoted: Every guy who wants to get married should go sit in the back of a divorce court for an afternoon. I've been divorced for 13 years now. My ex is in the process of taking me back to court right now for the 20th time. No shit. My running-tally legal bill is a bit over $654,000. It's one of those things you just can't believe until it happens to you. Sometimes it's hard to believe even while it's happening.

Geez...thank you for sharing that with us. I will either remain single or take it nice and slow at least 5 years before I marry a woman...

It's pretty messed up when the legal system basically encourages you to kill her, rather than divorce her.

Quoted: Quoted: Quoted: Every guy who wants to get married should go sit in the back of a divorce court for an afternoon. I've been divorced for 13 years now. My ex is in the process of taking me back to court right now for the 20th time. No shit. My running-tally legal bill is a bit over $654,000. It's one of those things you just can't believe until it happens to you. Sometimes it's hard to believe even while it's happening. I've read this before but forgot-  for what is she taking you back to court all these times? Alimony? Child support??? She wants more child support, child support to continue while the kids are in college, a court order for me to sell the house I've been building and to use the proceeds to pay for "all post-secondary expenses without limit", and for the court to find me in contempt (although she's graciously offering to accept "punitive damages in lieu of incarceration".

Not too many people I'd say this about here, but I hope she wins.

Anyone know off the top of their head what OJ or Robert Blake's legal bills totaled?   Just trying to determine which one is cheaper.

eta:  My grandfather alway said "Hell hath no fury like a woman scorned".

Quoted: Maybe if you marry the right person in the first place this would not happen. This is what happens when you marry somebody with no morals or scruples. CRC

I don't think you can base divorce on this. I think sometimes people change. The girl you married is not necessarily the one you have 10 years later.

And I know of two divorces because the woman became born again and got upset with hubby for not joining her in switching faiths.

War of the Roses.

Quoted: Here's a case the Colorado Court of Appeals just handed down today ass raping a guy in a huge, major way. LINKY The couple was wealthy, but only because the husband's family left a lot of property to husband and this property appreciated during the marriage.    Note the biased way the Court describes this, saying:  "wife explained that the case involved assets worth millions of dollars . . . many of these assets came from husband’s parents. . ."    That's a shorthand way of saying that many of those assets were bequeathed to husband when his folks died, or gifted to him over the years individually.   In Colorado, like most states, inheritance and gifts are separate property of the spouse that receives them, but APPRECIATION on those things becomes joint marital property.   The wife worked every day doing a horse boarding operation at the couple's ranch, but once she filed divorce she, you know, claimed she couldn't actually go out and get a job doing that.   She was awarded spousal support as if it would be impossible for her to earn a wage . In a lesson for all those guys who give their spouse an "allowance" each month, be prepared for that to become the floor for alimony, as that's what happened here.   Husband was ordered to pay his wife $3000 a month in maintenance.    I would suspect that her "allowance" -- given she was a homemaker -- also included HIS food costs and other joint housekeeping expenses, but you will see they didn't do anything with that. Moreover, dude was ordered by the court to ADVANCE $150,000.00 to prepay his ex-spouses attorneys' fees war-chest and the cost of appraising all that property. She's stealing from his family legacy, money and things his parents handed down to him.   A prenuptial agreement would very easily have taken care of this issue, by providing that separate property AND appreciation on separate property remains the property of the spouse that receives it. This lady did one MAJOR thing right.   You'll see that the case is in Garfield county, and that's where the Husband's lawyer was from.   But the wife hired Bill Hunnicutt, one of the "huge guns" out of Denver.   And the Husband is getting PWN3D quite mightily. So, lets review: 1.   Don't treat your spouse like a teenager with an allowance.  Even if you're a sole breadwinner and she's a homemaker, come up with a different mechanism for each of the spouses' folding money.   I like separate accounts and a single "bill paying" account where both spouses earn a wage. 2.   PRENUP  PRENUP PRENUP!    Get one.   A good one. 3.   Hire the best lawyer in the state, because if you don't she will.  If your wife brings in a big gun you're already two strikes down, as she's got that and the biased laws on her side. I didn't get raped this badly in my divorce, but my spousal support was about that much each month (roughly 63% of my take home pay, plus there was child support).

Hmmmm...sounds like a really good MBA Thesis Topic: Business Case Analysis of Hookers vs. Ex-Wives

These laws are obviously screwed up.  Clearly a well written prenup that will stand up in court is the only answer.
Consider the impossible juxtaposition of moral imperative vs temptation:

1.  The moral and 'right' thing to do is to stay faithful to your husband, dutifully acting as a partner within a time honored institutuion, assuming that the husband is capable of a functional relationship.

2.  Opposed to this is a temptation to, in some states, increase your net worth drastically (especially in the case of a woman with no prior assets in a 50/50 split state) by walking away from everything.

Stacks of cash you've never had before and can get simply by leaving someone must play powerfully on a womans psyche.  Wouldn't it affect some of us?