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Posted: 10/27/2004 6:35:10 PM EST
[Last Edit: 10/27/2004 6:37:40 PM EST by Daytona955i]
So today my Fiancee tells me she doesn't feel the same sort of love for me that she used to, and decided to break it off... She hopes we can be friends, and she says she's not sure if we will get back together or not. Yeah it hurts... I really care for her still, and I'm going to stay on good terms for now... However, the first thing I did was go out and buy a pack of cigarettes and drive around with the music as loud as I could play it. She hates loud music and smoking... On the brighter side, I won't be spending as much money on her, obviously, so it looks like I'm getting that ARFCOM membership soon. I guess she never liked shooting that much anyway Just figured I'd rant, I know other guys here have been through the same type of things.
Link Posted: 10/27/2004 6:37:06 PM EST
You'll get over it. Two years from now you'll be fucking some porn star saying thanks.
Link Posted: 10/27/2004 6:43:57 PM EST
As a foot note... Don't you hate it when something happens(you wreck your truck, you break up, or your dog gets hit by a car), and every TV show you watch has something to do with that same thing that just happened to you? It's like salt in the wounds... they know.... [tinfoil/]
Link Posted: 10/27/2004 6:44:02 PM EST
New dick syndrom. It will make them tired of your ass every time.
Link Posted: 10/27/2004 6:44:50 PM EST
It'll be OK.
Link Posted: 10/27/2004 6:44:53 PM EST
Sorry to hear that
Link Posted: 10/27/2004 6:45:23 PM EST
You'll be fine Daytona. Avoid her as well as you can. You don't want to see her with other guys.

Find a bimbo and have fun.
Link Posted: 10/27/2004 6:46:31 PM EST
Women are like the tide,

they come and go

Good luck
Link Posted: 10/27/2004 6:47:01 PM EST
Link Posted: 10/27/2004 6:47:38 PM EST
Better to find out NOW then after you said "I do".

Don't spend a lot of time worrying about what MAY happen, just live your life a day at a time until you get back on your feet.

Watch out if she decides to try and make a comeback in your life somewhere down the road. If that happens evaluate the situation (and yourself) AT THAT TIME, not based on memories of the past.

Good luck. You've got a LOT of people here that have been down that road to support you.
Link Posted: 10/27/2004 6:52:35 PM EST

Originally Posted By thebeekeeper1:
Assuming you have no offspring with her, this is MUCH better/easier/cheaper/quicker/BETTER than a divorce later.

I'm sorry to hear it, but you will be fine with time and eventually will realize what a huge favor she did you.




Yep, better to get out now!
Link Posted: 10/27/2004 6:54:29 PM EST

Originally Posted By Daytona955i:
So today my Fiancee tells me she doesn't feel the same sort of love for me that she used to, and decided to break it off...


If might feel like you've been stomped on, but it's better now than later when you're far more invested.


She hopes we can be friends, and she says she's not sure if we will get back together or not.
Make her your past, stop all contact. Friends, nope... She'll forever have that power over you. A break means BREAK.

Is she manipulative? 'being friends' after a romantic relationship is woman code for 'pilot light'. Don't be a sap, walk away...
Link Posted: 10/27/2004 6:55:40 PM EST
Link Posted: 10/27/2004 7:01:49 PM EST

Originally Posted By Aimless:

Originally Posted By thebeekeeper1:
Assuming you have no offspring with her, this is MUCH better/easier/cheaper/quicker/BETTER than a divorce later.

I'm sorry to hear it, but you will be fine with time and eventually will realize what a huge favor she did you.

Amen, what really sucks is seeing guys who have been with the same woman for YEARS AND YEARS and having children with them get this speach, you are better off not having to waste further time with this person or getting in any deeper.

Get out of the house and do something active to take your mind off her. Or screw her younger sister, your choice.



Hmm... her younger sister is a cheer leader... and 18.... I like the way you think.
Link Posted: 10/27/2004 7:03:59 PM EST
Link Posted: 10/27/2004 7:04:49 PM EST

Originally Posted By Daytona955i:

Originally Posted By Aimless:

Originally Posted By thebeekeeper1:
Assuming you have no offspring with her, this is MUCH better/easier/cheaper/quicker/BETTER than a divorce later.

I'm sorry to hear it, but you will be fine with time and eventually will realize what a huge favor she did you.

Amen, what really sucks is seeing guys who have been with the same woman for YEARS AND YEARS and having children with them get this speach, you are better off not having to waste further time with this person or getting in any deeper.

Get out of the house and do something active to take your mind off her. Or screw her younger sister, your choice.



Hmm... her younger sister is a cheer leader... and 18.... I like the way you think.




Share the love! I can be there in three days to steal the sister away. You can have the mother.
Link Posted: 10/27/2004 7:04:52 PM EST
Bummer, dude...BTW, the Red Sox just won the World Series...
Link Posted: 10/27/2004 7:05:40 PM EST

Originally Posted By thebeekeeper1:

Originally Posted By Daytona955i:
Hmm... her younger sister is a cheer leader... and 18.... I like the way you think.



Just don't get her knocked up--she's probably worse, once you get past the thin outer surface.



HAHA! Now that would be some revenge on the older sister!

A lot of this might be that her parents are in a nasty divorce and she's freaking out, but that's not really the best way to do things. However young people in love have never been the brightest... I'm just glad I know that fact.
Link Posted: 10/27/2004 7:06:51 PM EST

Originally Posted By IamtheNRA:
Bummer, dude...BTW, the Red Sox just won the World Series...



Ouch man, way to rub it in (diehard Yankee's fan, pre-birth)
Link Posted: 10/27/2004 7:11:37 PM EST
[Last Edit: 10/27/2004 7:13:16 PM EST by Daytona955i]

Originally Posted By Combat_Jack:

Originally Posted By Daytona955i:

Originally Posted By Aimless:

Originally Posted By thebeekeeper1:
Assuming you have no offspring with her, this is MUCH better/easier/cheaper/quicker/BETTER than a divorce later.

I'm sorry to hear it, but you will be fine with time and eventually will realize what a huge favor she did you.

Amen, what really sucks is seeing guys who have been with the same woman for YEARS AND YEARS and having children with them get this speach, you are better off not having to waste further time with this person or getting in any deeper.

Get out of the house and do something active to take your mind off her. Or screw her younger sister, your choice.



Hmm... her younger sister is a cheer leader... and 18.... I like the way you think.




Share the love! I can be there in three days to steal the sister away. You can have the mother.



Settle for cheerleader friends? They've always liked me because I can change their oil and tell them how to do math
Link Posted: 10/27/2004 7:14:34 PM EST
best cure for getting over an ex.... a new ex gf
Link Posted: 10/27/2004 7:21:00 PM EST
[Last Edit: 10/27/2004 7:21:48 PM EST by warlord]
Sorry to hear that, 2 years is a long-time. You guys should've got married within a year, but it's better to break now, than to get a divorce later. She wants to do the "be friends" so that she can come back if she can't find anyone/anything better. My feeling is, run and not walk far far away and consider yourself fortunate.
Link Posted: 10/27/2004 7:28:04 PM EST
I feel for you. That shit hurts. It can hurt for years... depending on the person.

But all I can say is..... better now than later.... when it would have/could have been a LOT worse. Count your blessing and find someone who is a better mate for you.
Link Posted: 10/27/2004 7:30:38 PM EST
Your fiance dumped you? Shooo... that was a close one. Imagine, you almost got married.
Link Posted: 10/27/2004 7:33:36 PM EST
I agree with Beekeeper. Be glad you didn't marry and have kids. Do NOT reconcile, you will only regret it.

Don't look back.
Link Posted: 10/27/2004 7:40:49 PM EST
I just went through it my self and there is no question that it hurts bad. Guys here actually gave me a lot of good advice but most of all assurance that everyone faces this at some point in their life and that the pain ebbs with time. It sounds like you are on the right track not to dwell on her though in my case it was easier in the beginning than a month later so do not be surprised if the feelings now are different in a few weeks. You will at some point hit a low but know that from there all you can go is up. This did happen for a reason and it is good that it happened now and not years into marriage. If she fell out of love with you then the match was not right, even if you still love her. It has to go both ways and finding out later could only hurt worse. Now you have been given the opportunity to step back, find yourself, and then move onto to a bright future with some one else. Good luck man.
Link Posted: 10/27/2004 7:45:16 PM EST
Screw the bitch and forget being friends, that will only make it harder for you since you still have feelings for her. There's plenty of other girls out there and right now the best thing for you to do is go out and find a "miss right now" and have fun and forget about the ex. I've been where you are before and it's not fun, but I believe that all things happen for a reason, so even though you may not know why it happened now, you'll know soon and be happier because of it. My ex girlfriend broke up with me out of the blue and I was devistated and then two weeks lafter that I met the woman of my dreams and we got married this past August.
Link Posted: 10/27/2004 7:48:54 PM EST
[Last Edit: 10/27/2004 7:50:32 PM EST by drew5337]

Originally Posted By DriftPunch:

Originally Posted By Daytona955i:
So today my Fiancee tells me she doesn't feel the same sort of love for me that she used to, and decided to break it off...


If might feel like you've been stomped on, but it's better now than later when you're far more invested.


She hopes we can be friends, and she says she's not sure if we will get back together or not.
Make her your past, stop all contact. Friends, nope... She'll forever have that power over you. A break means BREAK.

Is she manipulative? 'being friends' after a romantic relationship is woman code for 'pilot light'. Don't be a sap, walk away..



+1,000,000

This is the ONLY way to get over a serious realtionship. "Friends" afterwards won't work, not until you stop loving her. Trust me, learned it the hard way.
Link Posted: 10/27/2004 7:49:11 PM EST
Sure she hopes you can still be friends. That just means she'll continue to dump all of her emotional shit on you and she doesn't have to blow you afterwards.

Avoid the "friendzone" like the plague.
Link Posted: 10/27/2004 7:50:22 PM EST

Originally Posted By Daytona955i:
So today my Fiancee tells me she doesn't feel the same sort of love for me that she used to, and decided to break it off... She hopes we can be friends, and she says she's not sure if we will get back together or not. Yeah it hurts... I really care for her still, and I'm going to stay on good terms for now... However, the first thing I did was go out and buy a pack of cigarettes and drive around with the music as loud as I could play it. She hates loud music and smoking... On the brighter side, I won't be spending as much money on her, obviously, so it looks like I'm getting that ARFCOM membership soon. I guess she never liked shooting that much anyway Just figured I'd rant, I know other guys here have been through the same type of things.



Drive to the first singles bar you come to...find another...
Link Posted: 10/27/2004 8:07:42 PM EST
Thanks guys... it does make me feel better to see that other people have been through the same problems as I have. Makes me feel less alone in the world... I'm a real internalized person, and I don't want to give my friends a bunch of drama, it isn't my style. However I'm glad I can always turn to the kindness of gun-toting strangers
Link Posted: 10/27/2004 8:10:36 PM EST
[Last Edit: 10/27/2004 8:10:51 PM EST by Panzerwolf]

Originally Posted By Daytona955i:
Thanks guys... it does make me feel better to see that other people have been through the same problems as I have. Makes me feel less alone in the world... I'm a real internalized person, and I don't want to give my friends a bunch of drama, it isn't my style. However I'm glad I can always turn to the kindness of gun-toting strangers



The best thing for ya now...is to hit the sweet poontang with a vengence...been there done that...sittng here now with a nice drink and some young chick to tell about it.
Link Posted: 10/27/2004 8:22:08 PM EST
+1 on the "no such thing as friends" advice. Give her the cold shoulder. If you fall for the "friends" trick you just show her that you're her bitch. If she was your "friend" she wouldn't be dumping you. Avoid the phone calls, don't answer her knocks at the door, if there are any. Done means done, she made her decision now she gets to live with it. Smoke, play loud music and get some new girls in your life.
Link Posted: 10/27/2004 8:26:42 PM EST
this ones for you
Link Posted: 10/27/2004 8:35:18 PM EST
"Friends"=she nails someone else, and you're her emotional tampon.

Move on, and don't look back.
Link Posted: 10/27/2004 8:36:25 PM EST
See if you can hit it one last time for old times sake....then post pics
Link Posted: 10/27/2004 8:40:42 PM EST
invest your next two years in someone who appreciates it. Just get yourself a few new guns. Trust me, it will all get better, especially now that you won't have to take her out and do all that dating crap. I been married 4 years now with two kids and I can honestly say the dating part of it sucked compared to where I am now.
Link Posted: 10/27/2004 8:40:48 PM EST

Originally Posted By Combat_Jack:
See if you can hit it one last time for old times sake....then post pics



Ha, yeah... she'll probably get upset one night and want to "get together" I probably would too... That doesn't make me weak, that makes me a man. I'll see if I can get a camera near by if it does happen. What sweet revenge it would be if she became the stuff...pooper...pics girl! haha
Link Posted: 10/27/2004 8:41:47 PM EST
Sorry buddy ... I know the feeling. YOu will be happier in the long run .. I know you probably don't believe that now, but take it from all of us who've been there.
Link Posted: 10/27/2004 8:42:01 PM EST
Platinum membership.....I'll get one for you if you do
Link Posted: 10/27/2004 8:52:11 PM EST

Originally Posted By Combat_Jack:
Platinum membership.....I'll get one for you if you do



That'd be a waste... Unless I can do it without being banned....
Link Posted: 10/27/2004 9:06:32 PM EST

Originally Posted By Daytona955i:

Originally Posted By Combat_Jack:
Platinum membership.....I'll get one for you if you do



That'd be a waste... Unless I can do it without being banned....



Well, thats been done before!
Link Posted: 10/28/2004 4:09:01 AM EST
Walk away.
Be a man.
Let her go and never urn back. NEVER.

Link Posted: 10/28/2004 4:21:14 AM EST
Link Posted: 10/28/2004 4:25:02 AM EST
Trust me, dude. You'll not only be fine, you'll be BETTER!

I wish to hell I had broken off my engagement instead of now having to break off my MARRIAGE with two kids involved!

BELIEVE me, you just received a BLESSING!

Good luck!
Link Posted: 10/28/2004 4:30:10 AM EST
walk away - avoid contact- especially if she wants to "talk" or try to get back together- tell her to get lost- do not let her back in
Link Posted: 10/28/2004 4:53:43 AM EST
Whoo, lots of good advice here, as always!!

Got divorced a little over a year ago after being married about 8 years. Let me just summarize a few things:

1. Just say to her, "Ok, thanks for the good time" and move on. DO NOT EVER call her again, drive by her house, etc.......you're done with her.
2. Don't gravel, plead, tell her you want it to work out...........see item one again.
3. Pull your panties on and go find another girlfriend. Just get to the bar or wherever and get driving again.
4. You can't be friends with this woman.......move on.
5. Lots of women out here........start working out, getting out and mingling with the ladies, running, eating correctly, go do hobbies that you want to, etc.


The boys here helped me so much on getting back on my feet after my divorce. I'm eating the way I should now, have 50% physical and joint custody of my girls, am having a great time with the girls, have a KICK ASS girlfriend (5'2", 115 pounds........a fuckin' hard body), lifting weights............in a way, the best thing my ex said to me is that she didn't want to be with me any longer. This was the beginning of the rest of my life.........it is now your turn to take the bull by the horns, improve yourself, and move on. It is time.

I use to think I needed to "get even" with her, to somehow get back at her. Believe me, when people say the best revenge is get on with your life and don't look back, trust me friend, that is the best revenge. Work on you, start running, lifting weights, eating right, and your pain will slowly creep away, happinness will return into your life, and the women will start showing up.......chicks want to be with happy, fun guys, not mopey guys. I'm in the best shape of my life, I'm having a ball with my girls, I've got a classy chick for a girlfriend..............

Sorry to ramble on, but my divorce was the hardest thing I ever went thru and feel obligated to help out someone else if I can. Good luck, man............there are lots of chicks out here, trust me!!

vmax84
Link Posted: 10/28/2004 4:59:46 AM EST
Sorry to hear that man. When I was 22 my GF was 25 and was in a hurry to get married. After 2 years she she tried to pressure me into putting a ring on her finger. This was on a Friday. I told her I was going up north and all her shit better be out of my apartment when I get home Sunday. She was gone when I got home. I am 32 know and married 5 years with 1 daughter and another on the way. I am sooo glad I broke up with her. It would have been one of the biggest mistakes of my life. Anyway, what I am saying is you will get over it. Do like I did and go on a 2 year shagging spree. Stuff it in any good looking chic that is willing.
Link Posted: 10/28/2004 5:19:56 AM EST
Run away and ditch her from your mind fast.

Getting dumped is a part of life...don't worry about it. We've all been unloaded on. It usually works out for the best in the long run. Here is how I learned to get even: Become VERY successful. She and her parents will then rue the day they let you escape instead of becoming the tree of life for her offspring. That type of revenge is sweet!

One thing is for SURE...better NOW than after you two were married. You don't even want to go there!
Link Posted: 10/28/2004 8:05:22 AM EST
This has happened to a couple of my good friends - FORGET HER QUICKLY, because she may reveal something you don't want to hear. Why open yourself to psycho babble and mind games? There are great women out there, and it is just a matter of odds and time for meeting them. Remember, THERE ARE MORE WOMEN IN THIS COUNTRY THAN MEN! DON'T FORGET THIS! IN THE LONG RUN, YOU GET TO PICK, NOT THEM! So, date as many chicks as you can, and have fun.

BTW - Get that ring back....sell it......and buy a new AR! Trust me you will feel better
Link Posted: 10/28/2004 9:54:20 AM EST

Originally Posted By Tele-Skier:
This has happened to a couple of my good friends - FORGET HER QUICKLY, because she may reveal something you don't want to hear. Why open yourself to psycho babble and mind games? There are great women out there, and it is just a matter of odds and time for meeting them. Remember, THERE ARE MORE WOMEN IN THIS COUNTRY THAN MEN! DON'T FORGET THIS! IN THE LONG RUN, YOU GET TO PICK, NOT THEM! So, date as many chicks as you can, and have fun.

BTW - Get that ring back....sell it......and buy a new AR! Trust me you will feel better



Hmmm a new rifle would be really nice...
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