Posted: 4/30/2001 7:56:24 AM EDT
Someone sent this to me...certainly hits the nail on the head!
Today we mourn the passing of an old friend - by the name of "Common Sense."
Common Sense lived a long life but died from heart failure at the brink of
the millennium. No one really knows how old he was since his birth records
were long ago lost in bureaucratic red tape. He selflessly devoted his life
to service in schools, hospitals, homes, factories and offices,
helping folks get jobs done without fanfare and foolishness. For decades,
petty rules, silly laws and frivolous lawsuits held no power over Common
Sense. He was credited with cultivating such valued lessons as to know when
to come in out of the rain, the early bird gets the worm, and life isn't
Common Sense lived by simple, sound financial policies (don't spend more
than you earn), reliable parenting strategies (the adults are in charge, not
the kids), and it's okay to come in second. A veteran of the Industrial
Revolution, the Great Depression, and the Technological Revolution, Common
Sense survived cultural and educational trends including feminism, body
piercing, whole language and "new math." But his health declined when he
became infected with the "If-it-only-helps-one-person-it's-worth-it" virus.
In recent decades his waning strength proved no match for the ravages of
overbearing federal regulation. He watched in pain as good people became
ruled by self-seeking lawyers and enlightened auditors. His
health rapidly deteriorated when schools endlessly implemented zero
tolerance policies, reports of six year old boys charged with sexual
harassment for kissing a classmate, a teen suspended for taking a swig
of mouthwash after lunch, and a teacher fired for reprimanding an unruly
student. It declined even further when schools had to get parental consent
to administer aspirin to a student but cannot inform the parent when the
female student is pregnant or wants an abortion. Finally, Common Sense lost
his will to live as the Ten Commandments became contraband, churches became
businesses, criminals received better treatment
than victims, and federal judges stuck their noses in
everything from Boy Scouts to professional sports.
As the end neared, Common Sense drifted in and out of logic but was kept
informed of developments, regarding questionable regulations for asbestos,
low flow toilets, "smart" guns, the nurturing of Prohibition Laws and
mandatory air bags. Finally when told that the homeowners association
restricted exterior furniture only to that which enhanced property values,
he breathed his last.
Common Sense was preceded in death by his parents Truth and Trust; his
wife, Discretion; his daughter, Responsibility; and his son, Reason.
He is survived by three stepbrothers: Rights, Tolerance and Whiner.
Not many attended his funeral because so few realized he was gone.
You would be surprised how many people never met your friend!
Boy, aint that the truth! [:|]
Sign up for the ARFCOM weekly newsletter and be entered to win a free ARFCOM membership. One new winner* is announced every week!
You will receive an email every Friday morning featuring the latest chatter from the hottest topics, breaking news surrounding legislation, as well as exclusive deals only available to ARFCOM email subscribers.