Just to follow-up, I think it was a combination of wet tumbling, and the Lyman M-die mandrels are a bit small, making for a very tight neck with 0.003"+ of swelling once seated. So I ordered a Sinclair Mandrel die and expander, and those open up the neck an extra 0.002" (ish). For the sizing, that I do before the M-Die, I also ordered a bigger ring for my neck sizing portion (0.290", vs the standard 0.288" I've been running); but for now am going to stick with the 0.288", and see what happens. I also ordered some of the neck powders, as an option to use while seating, though will sit on that at first.
I have a lot of already processed brass, so for the next few hundred rounds, will just try it with the bigger Sinclair mandrel. When I get to seating some more bullets, I'll post on if that fixed it.