Years ago I managed to learn code well enough to pass the test and never went any further. I sold my key & keyer some years ago. For some reason I really miss my old Bencher & now I have the inkling to give it another go. I wish I had my old Heathkit tapes as they made it easier than any number of other tapes. Now I'm using The Morse Elmer app and lcwo.com and I run the speed at 30 wpm with 5 wpm spacing which seems to work for me. I run 10-20 minutes of practice during my daily commute adding more letters as I progress and listen to code on the bands and just pick out what letters I know so far though I know the real goal ultimately is to hear whole words. For those of you who are proficient, besides practice, what helped make it all come together for you?

Ha...I've been at it for six years, and I'm still not proficient.  

But I guess what helps me most, is just getting on the air and making contacts.  I'm not much of a rag chewer, so the SKCC sprints are helpful for me.  The exchange is more like a "proper" QSO (RST, Name, state, SKCC number) than a contest exchange, and most guys add in a little small talk like "GL in WES", "tnx for new nr", and of course "73".  Plus, everyone is friendly, and slows down to help the new operators.

For practice, I used the G4FON Morse Trainer.

I had to break the 13/20 word gap between General and Extra. I found that tuning to the CW part of the Extra band and just listening to the higher speed code was helpful.

I had NO expectations of copying everything, but I'd catch a character or two.. then three... then whole words!

Give it a try. Take the attitude that "There's NO WAY I'll copy all of it but I'm gonna be happy with a few characters here and there."

I only got my toes wet in HF, for a while.  I used CWget software to read out CW, and depending on bandwidth settings I could copy quite a few conversations at once or narrow the bandwidth and copy just one.   There's software that would transmit code that I typed in on the keyboard as well, and while not everybody would approve of using these crutches,  they can support you while you listen, practice, and learn...maybe a bit faster than without them helping you.

Don't be afraid to try them out.  Especially CWget, which can help you to look for specific operators by looking for them to transmit their calls,  when you're not yet good enough to reliably pick them up by ear.

I used Just Learn Morse.  Used to use it during lunch and breaks etc.  Like others said.  Best way to really speed up is get on the air.  I tune to the CW part of 40M when I drive and just listen.  Could get a letter then a few letters, then a word or two.  Abreviations still get me when Im trying to head copy.  But I can pick up some words now.  And I am by no means an expert.

I am by no means as proficient as I'd like to be but...
I found this to be a great read on the subject.

The Art and Skill of Radio-Telegraphy

I used code quick not sure if it's still a thing.

Don't be a one-trick pony, add a straight key into your repertoire. Then join in our SKCC weekend (WES) and two-hour (SKS) sprints. You can also find slow-speed OPs hanging around our operating frequencies.

Use the ARRL code practice files. They're real-world text from past issues of QST.

For added realism, use the W1AW practice sessions. The 40 Meter frequency (7.0475 MHz) will sometimes "feature" SSB QRM from hams in Regions 1 and 3.

HINT: Start a notch or two above the speed you want to practice, then after a couple of minutes, drop back. I found it helped to kick back in the recliner, close my eyes and just listen. It bumped my "head copy" speed up in a hurry. Use the W1AW daily bulletins once you become comfortable around 18 WPM.

Seems I'm on the right path based on your suggestions. As stated I've been running 30WPM characters which is fast enough, for now, that I hear the letter and not the combination of dits & dahs making up the letter, I'll bump that up when I master the full alphabet and numbers again. The 5wpm spacing gives my brain some processing time. I seem to recall the Heathkit training differed from the Koch method by grouping the letters with the same number of elements: E T, A N M I, U R S O K D G W etc. Numbers were left for last and grouped by themselves.

I've had a couple of slow & sloppy CW QSO's, but really want to get better at it.

I 'know' my characters and numbers, just not well enough to immediately recognize them. So not yet ready to ragchew. I'll feel better about it once I can accurately copy call signs.

I've been working on it using the scphillips Morse Code Trainer. I'm running it at 25 WPM characters, with 20 to 23 WPM Spacing. All with the text hidden.

I'll replay each word or call until I think I have it right, then view and see how I did. As of now, I'm correctly recognizing words hearing them one to four times, but call signs still trip me up. I've been having to play them a few more times to correctly copy. My short term memory isn't helping me either. I'll hear the first part, then while concentrating on the latter part I forget the first...

I'm going for the head copy thing, as I know writing will add another thing to mess with me.

I know it takes time, and I'm at it a couple of times a day. I'll get there. I'm definitely seeing improvement.

what helped me pass the 13wmp test, was to call CQ every night and work a few

then have a beer

What worked for me was to not have a microphone on the property. I came into HR with the approval of the no-code tech program abt ‘91. This was fine for 6 months or so but I didn’t feel like a real “ham”. Several times in my life I wanted to learn the code you know with the boy scouts. I set myself up with a good stenographer pad and very smooth writing pens. Every night after work I would go listen in the novice bands. Write down everything including unsure letters as a underscore. Took me about 3 months and I felt that I could pass the 5 WPM test. I did very well on the 5 wpm test but failed terribly on the 13. No surprise there. Every night and I meen every night I worked code. I might work 10 QSO’s and this went on. Passed the 13 wpm test about 5 months later and grabbed the 20 wpm ring.

I then changed my call sign when I passed the 20 wpm test (the written was passed almost a year earier) and I received AA7VY. Then came the Vanity callsign program  and I applied for the vacant N7VY. I received that and 26 years later I still have it.

Look at what your trying to accomplished. It’s a small goal and it can be won with repetition. Do it slow and get rid of all distractions. I worked CW contests. I know, it’s for the experience. I rambled on long enough. Enjoy and have fun.

Gordon. N7VY

I've been using the Morse Elmer app and doing 20-30 minutes of code practice a day. Years ago I did well enough to pass the General. I've been doing pretty well thus far with the app anyway. I need to get on schedule with the ARRL sessions. I'm torn at the moment, I really want a decent key like the Kent to start practicing with but I don't want to shell out the $$ just yet in case something else distracts me. I don't want to buy something cheap either.

In Red! Yes!

I’ve jumped back in and make a CW QSO or two a day...slow code...getting faster..I get tripped up by guys who are all out of rhythm and don’t know how to space their words...and guys trying to learn how to use a cootie....

I'm going to get the Arrl sked and set a timer on my phone. They xmit on echolink so it's convenient. I've got thirteen letters down pretty consistent at 30WPM with 5wpm spacing. Didn't really realize it but Morse Elmer apparently sequences the letters based on the most frequently used. So most signage and common words you see I can already sound out & send in my head. I'm starting to have little Zen moments where I "hear" the letters without hearing the code and have gone back and "heard" a letter that I missed in a string or I hear letters when I'm distracted so maybe there is hope  The 30WPM letter rate really seems to be the trick for me, thought about kicking the speed up a little more even. "O " & "." sound terribly long.