Sorry for the delay.
Well, when I was transferred out here in 1988, kicking and screaming, it was not my intention to stay, so I didn't pay any attention to state or local politics because I figured I'd be gone before too long. So I had no idea who Joan Finney was when I encountered the woman during her run for governor.
I was eating lunch with a co-worker when we noticed this grandmotherly looking woman working the room, passing out brochures and whatnot so I asked my buddy, who's that, somebody's grandmother running for alderman or councilman or whatever it is you people have out here? He knew who it was but wouldn't tell me; that's just the way he was about anything he knew that you didn't. I'd learned his operating procedure by then and it pissed me off, to be frank about it, and I thought, I'll break your ass from playing this game right quick.
So Grandma finally gets to our table and says Hello, I'm Joan Finney and I'm running for governor in the primary and who are you gentlemen and where do you work? So my buddy identifies himself and said he worked at Company X and she nodded like she recognized the place and said oh yes, and repeated the company name, and I'm thinking jeeze lady, could you just be a little less phony about it?
And she turns to me and says how about you, sir? and in my best South Texas accent I said no ma'am, I'm not in bidniz heah in town. Oh, she said, what is it you do and swear to God, it popped out before I could even think about it, I said I was the local representative of the John Birch Society. My buddy pert neart to swallered his dentures.
And so did Ms Finney. Her lower jaw bounced off the floor and she literally sucked in a double lung-full of air, grabbed her chest and took three giant steps backward. I thought I'd given Grandma a heart attack, so I said, oh no ma'am, come on back, I'm just kidding and I work with this gentleman here and I'm pleased to make your acquaintance. She exhaled loudly and walked back over and I asked her, what political party did she espouse? Oh, she said, I espouse the Democrat political party, like a parrot, and I told her I'd be real sure to keep that in mind and she thanked us and fled at warp speed.
My buddy was schitting bricks and all pissed off and asked how come I did that and I told him, next dang time you'll answer me when I ask you a question, won't you? And it did break him from playing that little game.
So I said to my buddy, if a bullshit artist from South Texas can nail her that quick, what does she think's gonna happen to her if she gets to Topeka and my buddy says well, she's already been the insurance commissioner for about twenty years and I said a few things that really shouldn't be repeated in public; a little NSFW or around small children; that kinda thing.
And of course lo and behold, she won and did become governor and I kept thinking KBI was probably gonna come look me up but they never did, at least as far as I know........
That's it; show's over.