Warning

 

Close

Confirm Action

Are you sure you wish to do this?

Confirm Cancel
BCM
User Panel

Site Notices
Arrow Left Previous Page
Page / 7
Posted: 11/30/2023 10:21:37 AM EST
3 am. Dead asleep. My newish German Shepherd decides she is scared and needs to cuddle in my bed.

80 pounds of dog leap into the air and two of four paws land square on me balls, the other two somewhere around my solar plexus with a snout and tongue smashed in my face accompanied  by the high pitched whine of "I'm scared dad"

So, I got to the shop about 4 this morning.


Not sure if that's better or worse than some of the other wake up incidents.

Funniest was definitely the mouse in the bed and the wife waking up, figuring out she was tangled up with the little guy, and watching her try to get out of her PJs and blanket like Jeremiah Johnson when he caught on fire sleeping on his bed of coals. I dont think she heard me say, "Didnt put enough dirt down. Saw it, right off".
Link Posted: 11/30/2023 10:23:25 AM EST
[#1]
Nightmare of my mom dying ( was suffering from cancer for 3 years).

She died that morning at 9:03am with me holding her hand.

Crazy
Link Posted: 11/30/2023 10:24:49 AM EST
[#2]
I'm sure there's worse but a phone call at 3 am never brings good news
Link Posted: 11/30/2023 10:26:48 AM EST
[#3]
Dead asleep odark thirty

Klaxon goes off, airborne about 5 minutes later.

Passing about 20,000 feet is when I realized this was not a dream and I was really flying.
Link Posted: 11/30/2023 10:27:23 AM EST
[#4]
Spider crawling on my face.
Link Posted: 11/30/2023 10:27:24 AM EST
[#5]
JDAM just outside the wire at O-dark thirty.
Link Posted: 11/30/2023 10:27:40 AM EST
[#6]
Meant to post a pic of the offender. Attachment Attached File


One month after I got her, she was still way underweight. 55 pounds the day I picked her up. She has bounced back pretty well from being adopted from the pound by some vegan idiot for 6 months who brought her back because she behaved like....a GSD.
Link Posted: 11/30/2023 10:28:01 AM EST
[#7]
My wife and I were asleep at my sister-in-law's house in Simi Valley, CA on the morning of Jan. 17, 1994 when the earth moved.
Link Posted: 11/30/2023 10:28:09 AM EST
[#8]
An earthquake at 4:00 AM.  It didn't throw me out of bed, but I wound up on the floor anyway.
Link Posted: 11/30/2023 10:28:46 AM EST
[#9]
Discussion ForumsJump to Quoted PostQuote History
Quoted:
I'm sure there's worse but a phone call at 3 am never brings good news
View Quote

Gods truth, right there.
Link Posted: 11/30/2023 10:30:14 AM EST
[#10]
Nightmares of my best friend watching me sleep for a couple years after he passed. It's when my sleep paralysis started.

My dog barking and growling at the front door like someone was breaking in. I think a dream must have woke him up, or maybe he really did run someone off.

Another sleep paralysis was someone tapping on my bedroom window in the middle of the night. I assumed it was a dream, I hope.
Link Posted: 11/30/2023 10:30:15 AM EST
[#11]
Discussion ForumsJump to Quoted PostQuote History
Quoted:
Dead asleep odark thirty

Klaxon goes off, airborne about 5 minutes later.

Passing about 20,000 feet is when I realized this was not a dream and I was really flying.
View Quote

I'm lucky. I'm one of those people who go from dead asleep to wide awake in a few seconds.

My wife and son take minutes.
Link Posted: 11/30/2023 10:30:25 AM EST
[#12]
Hey, it's your fireguard shift.
Link Posted: 11/30/2023 10:31:04 AM EST
[#13]
Quoted:
3 am. Dead asleep. My newish German Shepherd decides she is scared and needs to cuddle in my bed.

80 pounds of dog leap into the air and two of four paws land square on me balls, the other two somewhere around my solar plexus with a snout and tongue smashed in my face accompanied  by the high pitched whine of "I'm scared dad"

So, I got to the shop about 4 this morning.


Not sure if that's better or worse than some of the other wake up incidents.

Funniest was definitely the mouse in the bed and the wife waking up, figuring out she was tangled up with the little guy, and watching her try to get out of her PJs and blanket like Jeremiah Johnson when he caught on fire sleeping on his bed of coals. I dont think she heard me say, "Didnt put enough dirt down. Saw it, right off".
View Quote
Nightmares
Link Posted: 11/30/2023 10:31:30 AM EST
[#14]
Wife #3 punching me because I cheated on her in her dreams.

Most likely brought on by guilt as she jumped from bed to bed with the frequency of a cheap ham radio.
Link Posted: 11/30/2023 10:31:50 AM EST
[#15]
Katrina refugees shooting at one another in Alexandria, LA.

My coworkers truck got hit.
Link Posted: 11/30/2023 10:32:30 AM EST
[#16]
Toss-up between an earthquake and my wife violently shaking me while screaming "Someone's breaking in the house!"
Link Posted: 11/30/2023 10:32:54 AM EST
[#17]
kinda like OP. Family lab scared of thunderstorm sneaking upstairs and licking me in the ear while I was sleeping. Then realizing that I was pissed just staying an arm's length away because she realized I couldn't see her in the dark (she was a black lab) unless lightening flashed.
Link Posted: 11/30/2023 10:33:11 AM EST
[#18]
Discussion ForumsJump to Quoted PostQuote History
Quoted:
I'm sure there's worse but a phone call at 3 am never brings good news
View Quote


Absolute truth. I'm always hesitant to answer them.
Link Posted: 11/30/2023 10:35:24 AM EST
[#19]
Fell asleep on airplane, woke up bonafide
Link Posted: 11/30/2023 10:35:51 AM EST
[#20]
At Cola NW last year 0200 got a wicked sick feeling and proceeded to vomit every piece of food I ate over the last day right outside my tent.

Got up found a snow shovel and spent 15 minutes picking it up and walking it over to a ravine to toss it away.

In Feburary.  About as far north in Idaho as you can get and still be in the States. At 2 in the morning.

Link Posted: 11/30/2023 10:36:15 AM EST
[#21]
Three AM i hear water hitting the floor and wake up to my then wife peeing on the floor in front of our bedroom door. She was squatting there just peeing away as I was yelling at her "WTF" and then realized she was sleep walking.
Link Posted: 11/30/2023 10:36:42 AM EST
[#22]
When I was a kid I had a paper route that my parents helped with.  There were a few mornings where I didn't get out of bed after a few wake-up calls from my dad.  On those mornings he would throw a cup of water in my face to wake me up.  It worked.

We had hamsters as kids and one night they got out and got in my bed.  I woke up to hamsters running around between the sheets.
Link Posted: 11/30/2023 10:36:58 AM EST
[#23]
Cat barfing on my face .
Shitting myself ( meds fucked me up)
90lb dog with bad gas.....

Just a few...
Link Posted: 11/30/2023 10:37:00 AM EST
[#24]
Shelves in the closet collapsing under the weight of my Ex-wifes clothes.
Link Posted: 11/30/2023 10:37:29 AM EST
[#25]
Rocket fire from Sadr city.  Not as bad as being woken up by a dog i’m sure.
Link Posted: 11/30/2023 10:37:29 AM EST
[#26]
Quoted:
I'm sure there's worse but a phone call at 3 am never brings good news
View Quote

Yeah, that, too. In my case it was a friend calling to tell me he was going to shoot himself. I had to talk him down from it.
Link Posted: 11/30/2023 10:37:55 AM EST
[#27]
Bitten by Brown recluse spider at 4AM.

I was exploring as yet undreamt of galaxies of pain.
Link Posted: 11/30/2023 10:38:33 AM EST
[#28]
Discussion ForumsJump to Quoted PostQuote History
Quoted:
JDAM just outside the wire at O-dark thirty.
View Quote
This, but VBIED instead of JDAM.
Link Posted: 11/30/2023 10:38:42 AM EST
[#29]
Quoted:
3 am. Dead asleep. My newish German Shepherd decides she is scared and needs to cuddle in my bed.

80 pounds of dog leap into the air and two of four paws land square on me balls, the other two somewhere around my solar plexus with a snout and tongue smashed in my face accompanied  by the high pitched whine of "I'm scared dad"

So, I got to the shop about 4 this morning.


Not sure if that's better or worse than some of the other wake up incidents.

Funniest was definitely the mouse in the bed and the wife waking up, figuring out she was tangled up with the little guy, and watching her try to get out of her PJs and blanket like Jeremiah Johnson when he caught on fire sleeping on his bed of coals. I dont think she heard me say, "Didnt put enough dirt down. Saw it, right off".
View Quote
Taking the Irish thing a little far, don't you think?
Link Posted: 11/30/2023 10:39:19 AM EST
[#30]
i have two...

stung by a scorpion on my ear - just woke up to searing pain on my ear, get the light on and see the little bastard on the middle of my pillow with his tail up in the air. that fucker got his tail ripped off and held with tweezers over a lighter.

my daughter had a friend over for a sleepover one night and about 4 am the transformer on the pole about six houses down the street blew up. the boom was so loud it literally, violently jolted me out of bed - pillows and blankets tossed like a tornado went through - pitch black with that buzzing sound and lightning arcing outside, i had no idea what happened and didn't know if that was my front door being kicked in or what so i grabbed my rifle and turned the light on - for a few seconds it was like being in half life scared the shit out the girls, and i ended up having to have a chat with her parents about the whole 'going through the house with a rifle' thing because they don't like guns. that one took a while to calm down again my heart was pumping so hard.
Link Posted: 11/30/2023 10:39:48 AM EST
[#31]
Discussion ForumsJump to Quoted PostQuote History
Quoted:


Absolute truth. I'm always hesitant to answer them.
View Quote View All Quotes
View All Quotes
Discussion ForumsJump to Quoted PostQuote History
Quoted:
Quoted:
I'm sure there's worse but a phone call at 3 am never brings good news


Absolute truth. I'm always hesitant to answer them.

My daughter, God lover her, is in college and has no set hours. Texts my wife in the middle of the night with random thoughts and ideas. Her reasoning : You should have you're ringer off when you sleep.

We had a talk...if you call or text at 3am, you better be bleeding, on fire, or in jail.
Link Posted: 11/30/2023 10:39:50 AM EST
[#32]
Discussion ForumsJump to Quoted PostQuote History
Quoted:

I'm lucky. I'm one of those people who go from dead asleep to wide awake in a few seconds.

My wife and son take minutes.
View Quote
Yup.
Cricket makes a noise I jump up..ninja ready to rock.
My wife and daughter......
Could sleep through the barrage at Verdon.
Link Posted: 11/30/2023 10:40:09 AM EST
[#33]
Had a couple of bad middle of the night phone calls, but for some fun in this thread:  I was about 10, and my sister who was about 6 at the time came in my room while I was sleeping, hit me in the head with a big book, then ran to my mom and said I hit her.  From sleep to hit in the head to a spanking in a minute.   She's less of a jerk now.  :)

Link Posted: 11/30/2023 10:40:47 AM EST
[#34]
Incoming mortar detonation.
Link Posted: 11/30/2023 10:41:53 AM EST
[#35]
I'm sure our military veterans would laugh at my worst waking moments! I was awoken by a ruptured appendix (felt like someone belted me in the stomach with a Louisville slugger. I was also awoken by my son who I feared was having appendicitis (I am apprehensive). After those two things a few months ago I was woken by the room spinning and me vomiting. I thought I had food poisoning. There was nothing dainty about my wretching but it failed to wake my husband (I now know that I'm on my own for self defense!) I fell out of bed and dragged myself into the corner of my bedroom-I couldn't make it to the bathroom as I was so dizzy I couldn't maneuver the turn into the bathroom. It was one of the most uncomfortable situations I've ever been in. Turns out that I had dislodged a pearl in my inner ear. Weird af. PT and I was good to go.

Link Posted: 11/30/2023 10:42:36 AM EST
[#36]
I had a Lab that had stomach issues.  I'm talking so bad that if the same brand of kibble he was on changed shapes for some reason he'd be sick.

I went to a Ducks Unlimited banquet and got pretty tuned up as I was not driving.  About 3/4 of the way home I realized I was out of dig food at home. . . Too late to stop at a store.  I opened the swag bag they handed out and low and behold there's a one serving sample of dog food.  You see where this is headed.

Fast forward to 4am and the smell!  Oh my God the smell!  Bloody diarrhea EVERYWHERE! On the walls, carpet, heat vent, etc.

Then it continued on through the kitchen and living room in the same fashion.  Poor dog, he'd never have done this if I hadn't screwed up.

I started tearing out the entire 1st floor carpet immediately (2 year old house) I can't remember if I threw up or not.  

Link Posted: 11/30/2023 10:43:21 AM EST
[#37]
Had a kitten and it decided to try to nurse on me.
Link Posted: 11/30/2023 10:43:43 AM EST
[#38]
Got woken up by a tornado, that was a whole lot of instant WTF is going on confusion. Thankfully it didn’t really tear up the house too bad.
Link Posted: 11/30/2023 10:44:07 AM EST
[#39]
Smoke alarm/s in house.

Daughter was an infant and the wife was boiling some bottles / nipples and fell asleep on the couch. Water boiled out of the pan, melted plastic and made a nice little fire. Fresh painted ceilings all had black crap on them that looked like burning acetylene residue.

Link Posted: 11/30/2023 10:44:11 AM EST
[#40]
Discussion ForumsJump to Quoted PostQuote History
Quoted:
At Cola NW last year 0200 got a wicked sick feeling and proceeded to vomit every piece of food I ate over the last day right outside my tent.

Got up found a snow shovel and spent 15 minutes picking it up and walking it over to a ravine to toss it away.

In Feburary.  About as far north in Idaho as you can get and still be in the States. At 2 in the morning.

View Quote

Bummer.

On a scouting polar bear campouts, it was 5f. Hear a scout next tent over, zzzzzip. Hugggggggh. About every hour until morning.

Felt bad for him but, itll make ya tough. He was up and at 'em in the a.m. Just not quite ready for bacon and eggs his patrol had scheduled for breakfast.
Link Posted: 11/30/2023 10:44:25 AM EST
[#41]
Punched in the face.

I deserved it.
Link Posted: 11/30/2023 10:45:17 AM EST
[#42]
Tent full of CS
Link Posted: 11/30/2023 10:45:25 AM EST
[#43]
Discussion ForumsJump to Quoted PostQuote History
Quoted:
I'm sure there's worse but a phone call at 3 am never brings good news
View Quote



Yep. It's happened to me a few instances and it scared me. When you've got five kids, there is a high probability you'll get those calls.
Link Posted: 11/30/2023 10:45:50 AM EST
[#44]
I’m dead asleep at 2:00 in the morning when my wife gently touches my shoulder and says, “Scott, what’s the combination to the gun safe?”

I was instantly awake reaching for the bedside gun.  Turns out she wanted earplugs because the sound of insects outside was keeping her awake.
Link Posted: 11/30/2023 10:46:02 AM EST
[#45]
Discussion ForumsJump to Quoted PostQuote History
Quoted:
Rocket fire from Sadr city.  Not as bad as being woken up by a dog i’m sure.
View Quote

Well, at least the dog isn't going to possibly kill me.
Link Posted: 11/30/2023 10:46:54 AM EST
[#46]
Indirect fire.
Link Posted: 11/30/2023 10:47:16 AM EST
[#47]
Alarm going off, house on fire. That sucks deluxe.
Link Posted: 11/30/2023 10:47:26 AM EST
[#48]
Fire, fire, fire. Fire in the engine room.

Dead asleep after being on deck for 12+ hours.

Smoke filled engine room from a generator that decided to desentigrate the flywheel.
Link Posted: 11/30/2023 10:49:44 AM EST
[#49]
Link Posted: 11/30/2023 10:50:08 AM EST
[#50]
Cat sneezing directly at my face at point blank range with a full load of snot.

When it's time for breakfast she hovers about 1/2 inch from my face and breathes heavily until I wake up,
a few times I year I get this special surprise.
Arrow Left Previous Page
Page / 7
Close Join Our Mail List to Stay Up To Date! Win a FREE Membership!

Sign up for the ARFCOM weekly newsletter and be entered to win a free ARFCOM membership. One new winner* is announced every week!

You will receive an email every Friday morning featuring the latest chatter from the hottest topics, breaking news surrounding legislation, as well as exclusive deals only available to ARFCOM email subscribers.


By signing up you agree to our User Agreement. *Must have a registered ARFCOM account to win.
Top Top