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Posted: 2/24/2021 11:46:06 AM EDT
[#1]
Man, this has a CoC ban written all over it....
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Posted: 2/24/2021 11:50:16 AM EDT
[#2]
 "We must not allow a monkey gap!" |
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Posted: 2/24/2021 11:53:30 AM EDT
[#3]
Peak monkey!!!!
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Posted: 2/24/2021 11:55:51 AM EDT
[#4]
Somebody, somewhere is attempting to discover the proper porn to get Chim Chim in the mood
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Posted: 2/24/2021 12:00:09 PM EDT
[#5]
this reads exactly like the beginning of a John Ringo series
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Posted: 2/24/2021 12:06:17 PM EDT
[#6]
Too many trunk monkeys in use, I suspect...
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Posted: 2/24/2021 12:09:56 PM EDT
[#7]
Quoted: strategic monkey reserve  |
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Posted: 2/24/2021 12:11:29 PM EDT
[#8]
Quote HistoryQuoted: Man, this has a CoC ban written all over it.... I guess I'm getting jaded. I didn't even think of that. |
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Posted: 2/24/2021 12:14:42 PM EDT
[#9]
ban monkeys they are dangerous.
when monkeys are outlawed only monkeys will have guns. 
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Posted: 2/24/2021 12:15:36 PM EDT
[#10]
Don't mind me, I'm just here watching the edgelords shitpost and play coy.
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Posted: 2/24/2021 12:15:37 PM EDT
[#11]
Quote HistoryQuoted: What. The fuck. Quote HistoryQuoted: Quoted: strategic monkey reserve Strategic Monkey Reserve is a great band name |
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Posted: 2/24/2021 12:17:46 PM EDT
[#12]
Research primates, primarily rhesus and cynomogus monkeys were becoming more and more difficult to obtain from the international market (either China or India) even before COVID.
Domestically raised macaques are very expensive and in short supply from commercial breeders due to USDA regulations. A young male rhesus could run well over $10,000 last time I was "in the know" about this sort of thing which has been a couple of years. However, this particular story was clearly ginned up by the the federal primate center they reference at Tulane and those in other locations to get their share of that sweet, sweet COVID cash. |
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Posted: 2/24/2021 12:18:26 PM EDT
[#13]
Texas has a bunch of dudes on Death Row.
Just sayin'. |
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Posted: 2/24/2021 12:18:29 PM EDT
[#14]
Damn dirty apes
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Posted: 2/24/2021 12:21:06 PM EDT
[#15]
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Posted: 2/24/2021 12:21:55 PM EDT
[#16]
I better de/invest my equity in Chiquita.
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Posted: 2/24/2021 12:26:10 PM EDT
[#17]
There's sig line material in there somewhere.
 In another note, my first thought was they might want to keep Detrick open! |
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Posted: 2/24/2021 1:24:20 PM EDT
[#18]
Bleeding heart lefties hounded many of the primate labs out of existence in the 90's.
Maybe we can subcontract that type of research out to the chineses where there are no ethical or cultural problems to deal with. I hear they have a really really really close analog to humans safely caged over there. |
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Posted: 2/24/2021 2:07:44 PM EDT
[#19]
A former coworker told us that he had once worked in a monkey research facility on the left coast and his job was to collect the monkeys from the cages so they could extract semen, lol. He said that they used an electric probe inserted in the monkey's rectum in order to extract the semen. We nicknamed him monkey spank
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Posted: 2/24/2021 2:30:10 PM EDT
[#20]
We do have a few swinging wild here in Florida.
But they do have that deadly herpes thing going on if that is a problem.... |
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Posted: 2/24/2021 2:33:19 PM EDT
[#21]
Vietnam has lots of monkeys as does all of SE Asia and the islands...you could raise all the monkeys you could possibly use.
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Posted: 2/24/2021 2:33:47 PM EDT
[#22]
Quote HistoryQuoted: Man, this has a CoC ban written all over it.... I had the funniest post that would have won the internet too. |
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Posted: 2/24/2021 9:07:10 PM EDT
[#23]
Maybe we need a Federal Wildlife Marshal to track down Jay and Silent Bob again to see if they have been stealing more monkeys from the labs
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Posted: 2/24/2021 9:12:12 PM EDT
[#24]
IBTL
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Posted: 2/24/2021 9:15:53 PM EDT
[#25]
 Peter Gabriel - Shock The Monkey Actually I was expecting Project X |
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Posted: 2/24/2021 9:27:29 PM EDT
[#26]
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Posted: 2/24/2021 9:37:26 PM EDT
[#27]
You can't make this shit up anymore.
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